Eternal Moon
by LMRaven
Summary: Dring New Moon. Bells jumps off the cliff to die.Alice sees her jump but does not see Jacob save her. Alice returns to Forks.Edward finds out about her "death" and stops in Forks on his way to die to say his last goodbyes.
1. Jump to End the Pain

First off, I did not abandon my other story, "Darkness Before the Dawn" but this idea came to me and it begged to be written. So, I have to get it out of my head before it is forgotten.

I know there are many varying themes of the same general plot but I think this one is a bit different. In short; During New Moon- Bella does jump off the cliff but not in an extreme sports way. She is actually trying to kill herself. Alice does see her jump but does not see Jacob save her. Alice returns to Forks. Edward finds out about Bella's "death" and makes a stop in Forks on his way to the Volturi to say his last goodbyes. Written in various POV's. Reviews welcome and I hope you enjoy.

Bella POV

It was all too much. I couldn't keep up the façade of normalcy anymore. The hole where my heart was gone after Edward left me that fateful day in the forest kept getting bigger and bigger until it threatened to consume me whole. The pain and the effort of just waking up in the morning knowing I had to face another day, another moment without _him_ was more than I could bear. I tried every day to keep my promise to _him_ though I didn't know why I bothered any more. He kept none of his.

Poor Charlie and Jake and Renee, I thought as I made my way to the edge of the cliff. They all tried so hard to help and maybe they did, for a little while at least. But that just delayed the inevitable. I just couldn't live without Edward. It was just that simple and maybe just that complicated.

I took small solace in the fact that I had written all my goodbyes. Even a letter to _him_, though I did not know if he would ever receive it or even read it for that matter. Maybe if he cared, even a little bit, he would. But I could not think about that now. My path had already been chosen the minute he left me in the forest, maybe even before that, maybe since we first met.

"_Your number was up the first time I saw you."_ He had said and I couldn't help now but think that he was right.

What a stupid lamb, I thought.

I heard the crash of the waves beneath me and could feel the spray of seawater hit my face. The violent white caps of the waves rolled toward the shore beneath me and for a moment I felt dizzy looking down at what would ultimately be my watery grave. Closing my eyes, I breathed deeply of the salty air.

The voice, _his_ velvet voice, came to me then. Of course it did. I was waiting for this. I was begging for this.

"_Bella, don't do this." _The Edward of my hallucination whispered pleadingly_._

I smiled sadly as I approached the very edge, feeling my sneakers teeter precariously on the dirt below my feet.

"_You promised." _ My imaginary Edward whispered again.

"You wanted me to be human, so watch me."

I jumped then feeling the upwards wind blow through my clothes as if it were trying to push me back up to solid ground. The water hit me hard as I landed and it came crashing over my head without remorse. Part of me wanted to fight the current and I felt my body begin to rise to the top as my mind kept trying to push me back down.

"_Fight Bella Fight! Don't you dare give up" He_ was frantic now in his pleading, desperate and angry.

I don't want to fight the pain anymore, I thought.

"_Please, Bella. For Me."_

How fitting, I thought as I was losing consciousness, that the last words I would hear were Edward's.

Jacob POV

I was wandering on the beach looking for any sign of that leech, Victoria. She was the reason that Harry Clearwater had a heart attack and died in the forest, I was sure of it. Instead of going back to the reservation with the others, I had to do something to feel useful. I smelled nothing but the sea.

Looking up, I scanned the area looking for any sign of red hair amongst the green around me. That's when I saw it, a lone figure on the cliff's edge, preparing to jump. Not Victoria, but who?

I recognized her them, fear shooting through me like an arrow. Bella? What the hell was she doing up there? I started running down the beach keeping my eyes her. I couldn't yell out to her, my throat clogged with panic and I didn't want to scare her to the point where she would fall.

Then to me amazement, I saw her jump. Her body hit the water and it swallowed her like a snack.

"NO!" I yelled, changing course and diving into the ocean. I couldn't think of anything else but finding her. There was a storm approaching and the violence of the water predicted that. With the current so strong, I doubted Bella would be able to survive.

What if she doesn't want to? A little voice inside my head whispered. I shook off the thought. No, she was getting better. Wasn't she? Maybe I was just too blinded by my feelings for her, my hope of what could be, to see it clearly.

That damn leech stole everything when he left reducing Bella to a shell of what she once was. I dived under the water, frantic in my search.

Nothing, I saw nothing under the murky depths that resembled the girl I had come the love; the girl that could not love me back. I came back up for air and dove down again.

There, wisps of brown hair! It was Bella. She wasn't fighting, she was floating, her body still with the exception of the movement of the water making her body sway with such bittersweet grace. I wanted to howl in pain.

Grabbing her, I pulled us to the surface and swam quickly to the shore. She was so still and her lips were blue, but I had to try. Bella could not die today too. One death was enough. I took a deep breath and blew into her mouth while trying to pump the water from her.

"C'mon Bella. Breathe! Just Breathe for me, damnit." I pumped harder, praying I wouldn't add cracked ribs to the extent of her injuries. "You don't get to die on me, not on my watch."

I breathed into her mouth again. Suddenly I heard it. A gurgle in her throat before the water rushed out of her mouth. I bowed my head in thanks to the higher being that allowed me to bring her back.

She looked into my eyes then with such pain in their brown depths.

"Why couldn't you just let me go?" she whispered hoarsely.


	2. Returning to Forks part 1

I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. On an aside note, I have seen some clips from the movie at .org/eclipse-trailer/ and I must say they are quite different from the book. I know they have to change the story for the sake of the time for the screenplay but never the less, I wish they had stayed more true to the story. The scene with the confrontation in the parking lot is disappointing to say the least. It doesn't show how Jacob tried to hurt Edward with his thoughts about how Bella was found in the forest and in the clip, Bella actually takes off with Jacob on the cycle right in front of Edward, which NEVER happened in the book. The confrontation clip where Edward and Jacob "get into it" after Bella breaks her hand from punching Jacob is different from the book as well.

Bella POV

Water spurt out of my lungs and I knew I had failed. Opening my eyes, I saw Jacob leaning over me breathing heavily.

"Why couldn't you just let me go?" I whispered to him hoarsely.

He moved away from me then sitting on the sand, his arms over his knees.

"I always knew he would kill you one day. I just never figured it would be by your own hand. God Bells, how selfish are you?"

"Selfish?" I asked angrily. If I had the strength to get up, I would hit him.

"Harry Clearwater died today, Bella.. You want to put another death on Charlie? How much can that man take without breaking?"

"Harry died? When?"

"A little while ago. Heart attack. But don't go changing the subject. Why would you do this Bella? Was the pain really that bad?"

My mind raced. I had to lie and convincingly so. Charlie could not know about this or he would send me back to Jacksonville or worse.

"I was cliff diving Jacob."

He snorted. "You really think I believe that? C'mon Bella, in violent water with a storm approaching? How much of a fool do you think I am?"

"But it's true." I pleaded. "I've seen you guys do it all the time. I didn't realize a storm was on the way. I swear." He needed to believe me. If he didn't, he would tell Charlie for sure. "You know I have expressed interest in doing it before." That part was true, I had wanted to try it. But not this time. No, this time I wanted it to be the end of me.

Jacob sighed seemingly weighing what I told him against what he thought to be true. He shook his head. 'I don't know whether to believe you or not."

I touched his bare shoulder tentatively. "I know" I whispered. "But please don't tell Charlie about this. He'll worry needlessly and you are right. I don't think he will be able to handle this on top of Harry's death."

He looked at me searching my face to try and find some sort of hidden truth there. I tried to keep my face as impassive as possible. "I won't tell Charlie. But I need your word Bella. You will not do this again without someone with you."

"I promise." I said. I could keep that promise. I wouldn't try the cliffs again but I would find another way. 'Please take me home. I'm cold." That, at least wasn't a lie. I was starting to shiver and the wet clothes weren't helping.

He stood up and grabbed my hand to help me up. "On top of all this, I don't want you getting a cold too. C'mon, let's go."

Alice POV (4 hours earlier)

I was getting tired of Alaska and the Denali clan and of everything in general. The whole family seemed to be falling apart at the seams right after our departure. Edward barely called anymore, maybe once every month, if that much. He had left soon after we reached Alaska claiming he couldn't be around anyone. So gone was he in his depression, he just left. A part of me was relieved that he did so, saving the rest of his family from going through his pain with him. Especially, Jasper, who felt Edward's anguish more than anybody. A part of me also hated Edward, hated him for forcing me to abandon my best friend, hated him for destroying Bella. You didn't have to be psychic to know that would be inevitable. Couldn't he see that leaving to protect her would cause the opposite effect? He hadn't even considered that the depth of Bella's love matched his own. But no, she was human, he had said. Humans inevitably forget and go on. He said he had read the minds of enough humans over the years to know. Stupid fool, I thought. Damned stupid fool.

Suddenly I was thrust into a vision.

_Bella was standing on the edge of a cliff looking at the waves below her. She looked haggard and gaunt as the wind blew her hair back from her face. She jumps into the rough waves of the ocean. Everything goes black._

"What do you see?" I heard Rosalie shouting at me. Her voice coming to me as if she were speaking through a tunnel. It echoed eerily in my ears. I hadn't realized I was rocking back and forth, moaning until just that moment. I jumped up then running to my room to quickly pack a bag. I needed to get to Forks now. I didn't even know if I would be on time to stop it from happening. I doubted it and I felt the sadness of it overwhelm me.

Rosalie followed me up the stairs shouting at me the whole time.

"Where are you going? What did you see Alice?"

I turned to Rosalie with a look of pure horror on my face. "It's Bella." I said shaking. "She is going to jump off a cliff. I saw her do it. Then I saw nothing."

A saw a faint glimpse of shock on her face then she slipped back to her normal demeanor.

"Oh is that all" She shrugged.

"Is that all?" I asked seethingly. 'She is going to die"

"Maybe we can go back to Forks then. Irina and Tanya are starting to get on my nerves."

"Do you even hear what you are saying? Bella is going to die and I can't get there in time! Edward is going to be devastated, not to mention everyone else."

"Oh, he'll get over it."

"He'll get over…" I couldn't even finish the sentence. I shook my head violently. "Don't you know Edward at all?" I was aghast. I always knew Rosalie was cold and self centered but this went beyond the pale. All she could think about was herself.

I ran past her back down the stairs and towards the front door and turned back to her. "Please tell everyone where I went. But don't call Edward, whatever you do." I turned the knob on the door ready to leave.

"Wait!" she called out.

I turned to look back at her not bothering to hide the disgust I felt for her on my face.

"If you're so sure you won't make it time, why go back to Forks at all. Why not just wait?"

She never understood how I felt about Bella either. She was more than my best friend, she was the sister to me that Rosalie could never be.

"Because I have to try. Because if I am too late, I at least want to see what I can do for Charlie."

"And how will you explain conveniently showing up."

"I don't know. I'll think of something on the plane. Goodbye Rosalie."

With that, I was out the door.

When the plane landed on the tarmac at Port Angeles Airport, I could tell by the sun's position in the sky that I was too late. Too late to save Bella and too late to save Edward. Dejected, I called Jasper on the phone.

"Alice, Rosalie told me what happened. Are you in Forks? Is Bella okay?" Jasper said frantically before I had a chance to speak.

"No." I whispered brokenly. I swallowed once not knowing what to say. "The plane just landed. I'm too late, Jazz. Too damn late."

"I'm so sorry." He said. And I knew he was. He felt this was all his fault. I knew Bella never blamed him but Jasper blamed himself.

"I know. Look, I'm going to see how I can help Charlie. I don't know how long I'll be here."

. "I understand. Please give Charlie our condolences."

"I will. Oh and Jazz, please don't tell Edward. Not yet at least. He should come home first. We should tell him in person. It may not change anything but I would like to try and prevent him from doing anything foolish."

He blew out a breath. He knew exactly what I meant.

Bella POV

Jacob took over the driver's seat of my truck forcing me to be the passenger. The rain started and soon it was torrential. Wanting to play it safe, Jacob pulled over to the side of the road to wait for the weather to become more drivable.

He turned to look at me, starting to speak when my cell phone rang. The number was Charlie's. I tried to make my voice sound as normal as possible when I answered. Jacob was eyeing me warily.

"Hi Dad" I said.

"Hey Bells. I'm not sure if you heard by now but Harry Clearwater died earlier today from a heart attack."

"Yes, I did. I'm so sorry. I know how close you were."

I heard him clear his throat trying to cover up the fact that he was near tears. Charlie hated to show too much emotion. "uh, yeah..thanks. I hate to ask this but do you think you would be alright on your own tonight. I'm helping with the funeral arrangements and I'll be spending the night at Billy's. We'll go straight from here to the funeral tomorrow."

"No problem." I said quickly. I would rather be by myself tonight.

"If you want to come, it'll be at the Forks Cemetery at 9 am."

"Not the one on the reservation?" That was a surprise.

"His wife is buried at Forks and he would've wanted to be rested next to her."

"Oh. Sure dad, I'll see if I can make it."

'You don't have to…I mean.."

"It's okay Dad."

The rain had let up some and Jake had continued driving. It was growing darker now. Twilight, I thought and suddenly felt a sharp pain in my chest as I remembered _his_ words.

"_Twilight. The safest time of day for us."_

I felt the tears started to form and willed them away. Hopefully Jake wouldn't notice. When we started to drive down my block, I saw Jacob's face scrunch as if he smelled something awful.

"What is it Jake?"

"Leech." He spat.

It was then that I saw it. A rental car parked in my driveway. My breath hitched. It was one of them. I went to run out of the truck when Jake's hand clasped my arm.

"Don't " was all he said.

"I have to. It's one of the Cullens. I can tell. Victoria wouldn't park a rental car in front of my house."

"It could be a trap."

"Let go of my arm Jacob." I said yanking it back from him. I was desperate.

"If you go, I can't follow you."

"I never asked you to."

"Fine." He said getting out of my truck and loped down the street after one last look at me. Part of me wanted to chase after him but I quickly shook that thought off. After seeing the car in my drive, I almost felt happy for the first time in months…almost.

I ran into the house and what I saw nearly staggered me. Alice was sitting on my couch. He face was sad. She turned at the noise of my entrance and for a moment it looked like she was expecting someone else to enter. Alice stared at me as if I were a ghost.

"How are you still alive?" She said running over to me and embracing me.

I was confused and then I realized that Alice "saw". "It's a long story." I mumbled.

She pulled back and looked at me and from the expression on her face I could tell she didn't like what she saw.

"Bella, why do you smell like dog?"

I smirked then. "That must be my friend Jacob you smell. He just dropped me off."

"Jacob?" He face scrunched as she pulled further back away. 'Does he work in a kennel ir something?"

I looked down knowing she wasn't going to like what I was going to say next. "No..he's sort of a werewolf."


	3. Returning to Forks Part 2 Alice's Fury

Bella POV

"Bella, why do you smell like dog?"

I smirked then. "That must be my friend Jacob you smell. He just dropped me off."

"Jacob?" He face scrunched as she pulled further back away. 'Does he work in a kennel or something?"

I looked down knowing she wasn't going to like what I was going to say next. "No..he's sort of a werewolf."

"A werewolf?'She shrieked. "We leave and you go to the first monster you can find?" She shook her head. "What are we going to do with you, Bella?"

I smiled sadly. "Put me out of my misery I guess." I mumbled half hoping she would. As much as I loved seeing Alice, having her here brought back the pain of him leaving much more magnified than the intense pain I felt every day since he had walked out of my life.

"Yes, about that." She said with a hint of anger. "What the hell were you thinking? Are you aware of how that would affect Charlie, Me, Edwa...?"

I held up my hand to stop her. "Please, I begged, please don't say his name. I can't…I..." Coherent speech stopped and I sunk down on the sofa and tried very hard to keep the tears from cascading down my face. But I couldn't. Wrapping my arms around myself, I sobbed.

Alice sat down next to me and placed a hand on my shoulder. 'Oh, Bella. What have you done to yourself? What did _he_ do to you?"

"It's not his fault Alice that he couldn't love me. I always knew it would end, that he would get tired of me. Who am I next to him anyway? I just couldn't stop myself from loving him. And when he left, Oh God, when he left, my heart and soul felt like they were ripped from my body and torn to shreds." I wiped my palms across my eyes to try to stop the tears.

I looked over at Alice and she looked positively livid. 'I'm sorry Alice. I should've never said anything. Now you're mad at me."

ALICE POV

Bella had it all wrong, I wasn't mad at her. I was furious with Edward. That she would think he didn't love her was preposterous. Edward was dying without her only he was too stubborn to turn around and come back where he belonged. He thought he was damning her, that he didn't have a soul. He was wrong. He did have a soul, Bella is his soul. I had to know what he had told her that day.

"Bella, I never looked in on that day we left…I promised Edward I would give him his privacy but I am asking you. What exactly did he tell you when we left?"

If possible, she wrapped her arms tighter around herself. I knew this was painful for her to relive but I had to know what damage he caused so I could begin to repair it. Bella wasn't our Bella anymore. She was this shell of the person I knew and loved.

"He…he said that he didn't want me anymore…that he loved me...in a way…but his kind were easily distracted. He said I….he said I wasn't good for him."

If I hadn't been furious before I certainly was now. Of all the things he could have told her, he chose what would destroy her. Only he was too foolish, too arrogant to see it. I wanted to break something. As it was, I felt my fingers dig holes into the couch.

"You just had to twist the knife a little more, didn't you leech?"

Startled, we both turned around. There stood one of the Quileute boys, it looked like and judging by his stance, he was angry, very angry.

"Jacob?" Bella questioned. "I thought you left."

So this was the werewolf, I thought as I recognized the smell. I was too focused on my anger to sense him coming and mentally chastised myself.

"I did leave but I had to come back." He looked pointedly at me then. 'To make sure you were okay."

"I'm not going to hurt her." I said insulted that this dog would think that I would consider harming Bella.

"It's okay Alice. He thought you might have been Victoria."

"Victoria!" I shouted. Damnit, I didn't see her either. Things were more dire than I thought.

"Yeah." Bella said. "She and Laurent both mad special guest appearances after you left. It seems I am more of a danger magnet than anybody realized." She shrugged nonchalantly and seemed apologetic.

That's it, I thought. Edward or no Edward, the Cullen's were moving back to Forks.

"No thanks to you." Jacob told me menacingly.

"Jacob" Bella warned then looked at me. "Do you think I could have a moment to talk to Jacob? There are a few things he needs to hear."

I nodded dumbly still processing all that I had heard. 'It's okay. I should hunt some and I have a phone call I need to make."

Bella grabbed my hand then almost desperately and I looked into her dead, gaunt eyes. 'Please, you'll come back won't you?" She almost begged.

I hugged her. "Nothing can stop me" I whispered to her looking at the mutt in a warning.

Walking out the front door, I dialed home. It was Rosalie who picked up.

"Bella's okay." I said knowing that Rosalie would care less one way or the other. "She did jump off a cliff but she was saved by a werewolf no less. That's why I couldn't see her come out of the water." I said in a rush.

"Oh" was Rosalie's only response. The tone of it sounded so odd that I could feel worry creep into my spine.

"Oh? Is that all you have to say?"

"Well, I kind of told Edward…" her voice trailed off. I gripped the phone as tight as I would dare without breaking it.

"You told Edward what?" But I already knew. I was in full panic mode.

"I told Edward that you went back to Forks, that Bella killed herself. That she jumped off a cliff."

"YOU WHAT?" I was enraged. "I told you not to say anything Rosalie."

"But Jasper confirmed it after he got off the phone with you. I just wanted everything to go back to normal again." He voice sounded smaller like a child who knew they did something wrong.

"I always thought you were selfish Rosalie, I just didn't realize how much until now. What did he say when you told him?"

"Well I don't think he believed me at first. He first thought Bella had moved but when I told him that she jumped off a cliff...well he was silent and the phone just disconnected. I tried to call him back but he wouldn't answer."

No he wouldn't, I thought. If he knew his whole reason for existing no longer existed, his time would be limited. I knew that. Poor Edward, I thought only able to guess at the utter anguish and torment he was going through. I tried calling him then hoping if he wasn't picking up Rosalie's call that he would at least pick up mine, but there was no answer.

I could hear Bella and Jacob arguing in the house.

"Who was that on the phone Jacob?" She shouted.

"No one, wrong number" was his response.

"You lie!"

"It was one of your leeches okay."

"Which Cullen?"

Did Edward call? Did Jacob answer the phone?

"It was Carlisle okay."

"Why didn't you let me speak to him?' Bella was raging now. I decided it was time to go back into the house. I didn't trust this Jacob Black. If he phased in front of Bella, he could kill her.

"Why didn't you let me speak to him?"

"Because, he didn't want to speak to you. He asked for Charlie" Jacob spat back.

I walked into the kitchen to see Bella seething at Jacob. He seemed to be taking Bella's ranting in stride. I stopped in my tracks as a vision assaulted me.

_Edward, his face tormented with purple circles under his eyes stood in front of the Volturi, begging for death. _

I gasped and looked at Bella. "What Alice?"

"Was it really Carlisle on the phone?" I asked shaking.

'What, you don't believe me, leech? That's who he said he was."

"When he asked for Charlie, where did you tell him Charlie was?"

Jacob didn't say anything and just looked at me smugly. Bella answered for him.

"He told him he was arranging a funeral. Harry Clearwater died today."

I closed my eyes feeling defeated. Of course. Edward wouldn't make a snap decision without verifying first. Based on what Jacob Black had told him, he thought Charlie was arranging Bella's funeral.

I looked at Bella very seriously. "Bella, that wasn't Carlisle on the phone. It was Edward. He thinks you're dead."

She didn't look like she understood me at first. "Okay, so call him back; tell him it was a misunderstanding."

She didn't get it. Of course she didn't. She didn't think Edward loved her.

I shook my head. "It's not that simple. He won't pick up his phone. He is going to Italy, to the Voturi."

I saw the dawning of understanding on her face as it clicked. "NO!" she shouted. 'Why? Why would he do that?"

"He loves you Bella." I told her. "He never stopped. If he thinks you're dead than he wants to die too."

She looked as panicked as I felt. "Can we stop him?" She asked.

"No Bella." Jacob cut in.

"Shut up Jacob." She said to him then looked at me. "Is there time?"

I nodded. "We would have to leave immediately for Italy."

"Okay then" She nodded "I'll throw some clothes in a bag." She went to run up the stairs when Jacob grabbed her arm.

"Please don't do this Bella. After all that he has done to hurt you, you want to save his life."

She looked at him sadly. "I have to do this Jake. I can't let him kill himself over guilt for me." And with that she ran up the stairs.

Jacob turned to look at me sullenly. "How can you take her to him knowing what he has done to her? You call yourself her friend. That's a joke. He is going to break her all over again."

"He loves her" I said. "More than you could ever imagine. And I love her too. So back off dog!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Next up...Edward POV. I know you all have been waiting for it.


	4. To Wish Impossible Things

I took a bit of artistic license and didn't copy Rosalie's phone call to Edward verbatim. As always, all characters are property of Stephanie Meyer.

_Remember how it used to be  
When the sun would fill up the sky  
Remember how we used to feel  
Those days would never end  
Those days would never end_

_Remember how it used to be  
When the stars would fill the sky  
Remember how we used to dream  
Those nights would never end  
Those nights would never end_

_It was the sweetness of your skin  
It was the hope of all we might have been  
That fills me with the hope to wish  
Impossible things_

_But now the sun shines cold  
And all the sky is grey  
The stars are dimmed by clouds and tears  
And all i wish  
Is gone away  
All i wish  
Is gone away_

"To Wish Impossible Things" The Cure

Edward POV

I couldn't remember the last time I fed on anything besides the rats that shared the dark hole of an attic I confined myself to. There was no desire to go out and hunt for something more substantial. Each day after I had left Forks bled into one another until they were just a massive blur of pain. Leaving Bella was the hardest thing I ever had to do. If I had a soul like she believed I did, I had left it with her. There was nothing left of me anymore. Even now, I deliberated going back, I imagined myself entering her open window enveloping myself in her sweet, scented embrace and begging, on my knees if I had to, to take me into her heart once more. I would spend decades if needed to convince her of my love.

But no, I couldn't do that. I had left for a reason and those reasons had not changed. I was still a vampire and only brought danger into her life. I could not go back knowing I would put in her harm's way, again. I couldn't allow myself to be that selfish. But, oh, how I was tempted. Just to see her face again. She wouldn't even have to know I was there. I banished the thought as soon as it entered my head. No, I couldn't do that. If I went back, nothing on heaven, earth or even hell could drag me away again.

The phone rang for what it seemed was the 25th time in 24 hours. As tempted as I was not to answer it, someone was trying desperately to get in touch with me. Perhaps something was wrong.

"Hello" I answered the cell. Was that _my_ voice? It sounded almost rough with misuse.

"Oh, so you can answer the phone..I had wondered." It was Rosalie. Her sarcastic tone reassuring me that there was nothing dire I needed to worry about.

"What is it Rosalie? I don't have the inclination to play your games."

"Oh can it with the attitude, Edward. I…"

I hung up on her not in the mood for her petty games. The phone rang again. I answered it, knowing I should just let Rosalie sat what she needed to say so I could be done with her. Otherwise she would keep calling.

"What is it Rosalie?" I hissed.

There was a brief hesitation on the other end of the phone. "I just wanted to let you know that Alice was in Forks."

I closed my eyes pinching the bridge of my nose with my fingertips. Alice just couldn't let it alone, could she? Maybe she saw a vision of me going back and wanted to beat me there first to ease the way for me. No, I thought. I hadn't made the decision yet. _Didn't you?_ A little voice inside my head asked.

"Edward, Are you there?"

"I'm here" I said.

'Well, you know how Alice thinks she knows everything. Like You." She laughed humorlessly then. Something was off about her voice. It had a nervous edge to it that I couldn't place. "Don't' you care why Alice is in Forks?"

I did but I didn't want to let her know that. "Not particularly" I said. Meanwhile my mind was racing. Alice in Forks, why?

"Well she is not exactly breaking the demands you placed on everybody." She sounded smug now. I wondered briefly if she became schizophrenic in my absence. "You only wanted us to stay away from Bella, right? Forks was never the issue."

I tried to wrap my head around this new tidbit of information. Bella was not in Forks. Where was she? Did she perhaps move back with her mother in Florida? Part of me was glad that she would be in the sunshine again; the selfish part of me despaired at the idea, knowing I could never follow her there.

"So really, there is no need to be upset with Alice." She said.

"So then, why the hell are you calling me?" I asked angry then. Did she think that changed anything? That I would go back if the rest of them did? Did she not know that Forks would be filled with painful memories for me? In every corner, in every shadow, there would me a vivid painful memory. Even here, in the depths of Brazil, I was overwhelmed with memories.

"You can come home now" She said. It was just as I suspected. "Everyone is depressed here without you. We all, myself included, miss you."

"There is a reason why I left everyone. I was not fit to be around anyone. That reason remains."

"But I thought once this Forks thing was finished, you would get over it."

And now I had to explain the real reason why I could never set foot in Forks again but I doubted Rosalie would understand. "Look, Rosalie. Forks was never the issue. Just because Bella..." the pain of saying her name out loud was nearly my undoing. '…just because Bella moved to Florida doesn't mean I am able…" Forget explaining, I thought. I was done. "I am not just fit to be around anyone" I finished.

"Um"

There was that nervous edge again. Something was definitely off.

"What is it Rosalie? Is something wrong with Carlisle? With Esme..?"

"No, no" she rushed. I sensed that she didn't want to give me the wrong impression. "It's just, well; it's just that I didn't say Bella moved, Edward."

What did she mean, Bella didn't move. Isn't that what this whole conversation was about? Bella moved so we could go back. Isn't that what she said? I felt like I was missing some vital piece of information. There was something not right about this and I couldn't put my finger on it.

She continued on in a rush. "No one thought you should know, but I thought that was crazy. I mean the sooner you knew, the sooner things can get back to normal again"

She was circling around something, something important and I couldn't put my finger on it. The way she was speaking, it sounded like I should've known right away, that it was that obvious. Only it wasn't.

"I don't know what you are getting at Rosalie." I said tiredly wishing she was off the phone already.

She paused then and I waited for her to continue. "She's dead Edward…I'm sorry. I thought you had a right to know. She threw herself off a cliff yesterday. Alice saw it and tried to get there in time but she called saying it was too late. She stayed to see what she could do for Charlie. You know how…"

I hit the "end" button on the phone effectively cutting her off. Bella, dead? No I refused to believe it. It was a lie, a mistake. It had to be. Because if it was the truth, my whole reason for existing was gone. There was nothing else.

With trembling hands I dialed a number, I didn't intend on dialing again. If Bella answered, I would hang up. If Charlie answered, I would get the information I needed.

"Swan residence" A young male voice answered.

'This is Dr. Cullen." I said in perfect imitation of Carlisle's voice. "Is Chief Swan there?"

"He's not here." The boy answered anger evident in his voice.

"Where is he then?" I asked getting impatient.

"He's arranging a funeral"

I shut the phone again feeling it crush to dust in my fist. More than my hands trembled now. My whole body shook. Bella was dead. No, No No. It couldn't be. She promised nothing reckless.

"YOU PROMISED!" I screamed flipping over the bed in my rage and fury, making the rats scurry in fear. Nothing in the small attic room was left undamaged in my wrath of grief. Loud sobs wracked my body as I destroyed the entire contents of the room.

Memories assailed me.

_Bella and I in the meadow for the first time. Her marveling at how my skin glistened in the sunlight. _

_Watching her sleep _

_Our first kiss_

All of it, everything came back to me in perfect clarity making the pain all the more severe including that very last day...the day I left her in the forest, one of the most painful memories I had with the exception of how I found her in the Ballet studio after James' attack…until now.

"_You…don't...want…me"_

I could still feel the anguish in her small voice.

But nothing compared to this.

I sunk down to my knees amongst the rubble that was my room, my hands pulling at my hair. Tearless sobs shaking my body.

"You promised." I said brokenly.

Suddenly I knew what had to be done. There was only on course left to me now. The Volturi. I hoped they took pity on me and would put me out of my misery. There was no point in going on in a world if Bella wasn't in it.

I jumped from the window, not caring who saw me and made my way blindly through the noisy streets to the airport. Everyone gave me a wide berth. I could only imagine what I must've looked like to them. Perhaps a man that has seen hell. That would be apt, I thought humorlessly. Bella dead was my hell and I needed to escape it.

I was fully intending to purchase my ticket on Alitalia to Florence but somehow, without any premeditated thought, I found myself at the American Airlines desk purchasing a ticket to Seattle. It was as if some unseen guide was leading me back to Forks, to where it all began. And I knew I needed to go, to say one last goodbye to Bella. No matter what pain it cost me. I owed her that much.


	5. Last Letters

"_Once I had the rarest rose  
That ever deigned to bloom  
Cruel winter chilled the bud  
And stole my flower too soon  
Oh loneliness  
Oh hopelessness  
To search the ends of time  
For there is in all the world  
No greater love than mine"_

**Love Song For A Vampire – Annie Lennox (from Bram Stoker's Dracula Soundtrack) **

Bella POV

Alice had purchased 2 first class tickets for the flight. I had promised to pay her back but she would have none of it, dismissing my offer completely with a wave of her hand.

"Oh, Bella, you're a part of this family whether you know it or not." She had said. I was confused by her statement and wondered what she meant by that. I had hoped that someday that would have been true but Edward's cold departure completely and effectively disabused me of that notion.

I was thankful to have had a passport even though I really never travelled anywhere. It was thanks to Renee that I had one at all. Upon a visit to a psychic, she was convinced that we were going to go to Paris and she made me apply for a passport the very next day. We never did go to Paris.

We were in midflight to O'Hare in Chicago, where we would have to transfer to the second leg of our journey. There were no non-stop flights to Florence from Seattle. Alice was reading a fashion magazine as I gazed out the window. In my nervousness, I had bitten my fingernails all the way down and I was starting to pick at my cuticles.

"You know it's not going to help any if you start bleeding on the plane." Alice said looking pointedly at my fingers.

"Oh, sorry." I said putting my hands under my legs where I couldn't get to them.

'It's okay Bella. You're just out of practice."

Alice's eyes suddenly glazed over and I could tell she was having a vision. I resisted the urge to question her, knowing any answers would have to wait until she was done. I didn't want to interrupt her seeing anything important.

"Damnit." She finally said.

"'What?" I demanded.

"It's Edward." She said. Those two words had the bile of fear rising to my throat. Was he dead already? No, he couldn't be. Alice would be much more upset. "He is not going straight to Italy. He must have made a last minute decision I didn't see until now."

"Where is he going then?" I asked frantically.

"He's going back to Forks. To say his last goodbye, you see, before he tries to convince the Volturi to end him. We'll have to go back." She sighed.

"But, but how?" I asked confused. "We won't get there in time. We won't be able to get a plane back to Seattle that quickly."

"Since when do you know me not to have a trick or two up my sleeve?" She patted my arm."Don't worry, I have my resources."

I watched her confused as she picked up the air phone and looked at me with a slight grin on her face.

"Hello, Donald" she said. "yes, it's Alice Cullen…I'm well, so is Jasper…yes that new piece of real estate you picked up was a real bargain…well I wanted to ask you if you still had one of your private jets at O'Hare….You do?...that's great…yes I do need it… family emergency…to Port Angeles airport…can you have it ready in say an hour?...great…thank you so much…yes, I'll let you know..take care, bye."

She hung up and looked at me smugly. My jaw hung open in disbelief as I was putting the pieces of Donald, Real Estate and private jet together in the puzzle. "Donald?" I sputtered. "You mean Donald..?"

She held up her hand and nodded. "Yes, _that_ Donald."

"But how? Why? I am confused."

"I had met him at a cocktail party some years ago and passed on a stock tip to him." She said as if it were the most casual thing in the world.

"Let me get this straight" I was still in disbelief "He gives you complete access to his jet on a moment's notice because you gave him a stock tip."

Alice crossed her legs and once again picked up the magazine. "Let's just say it was a _very _good stock tip." She said.

I leaned back in my seat and felt the first genuine smile on my face in a long time. I didn't want to think of what was waiting for me once Edward saw that I was alive. I would ease his guilt with no promises this time and he would be out of my life once more.

We didn't have to wait for baggage claim at O'Hare since we had none and ran straight to the non commercial part of the airport where a plane was fueled and ready to go for us and we were headed back from whence we came.

Edward POV

Forks seemed to have changed. It was darker and gloomier somehow. Thunder rolled in the distance threatening rain. I knew, though, that it wasn't Forks that had become darker, it was I. The brightest, the only light in my existence had been snuffed out and my world succumbed to everlasting darkness.

Charlie wasn't home, I noted as I stared up at her window. It was open as if she were still waiting for me. I answered the invitation and jumped onto the ledge and into her room. Her scent was still strong here and it nearly brought me to my knees. I took in the room, noting the subtle and not so subtle differences. All her beloved books were stacked neatly on the bookshelves, a fine coat of dust covering them. It was if she had stopped reading altogether. Clothes were strewn about the floor as if she had dumped them in haste. They were still clean and held the smell of detergent on them.

It was then that I noticed them. Four Envelopes on the floor. They must have been blown off the desk by the breeze coming in from the window. I picked them up and read the names on the back of each one; _Mom & Dad, Jake, Alice, Edward._ Her last letters, I thought.

So hasty in my greed to read her final words, I tore open the first envelope, not caring if it weren't meant for me. I wanted, no, I _needed_ to read all of them. Unconsciously, I sat on her bed, the bed we had lain in together so many times. Her scent was so much stronger here, entwined into the fabric of her sheets and pillow. Opening the tri-folded letter, I read.

_Dear Mom & Dad,_

_Please forgive me. I can't do this anymore. Dad, I am so sorry for what I have put you through these last few months and Mom, I know you couldn't be burdened with it either. It is better this way. Really. The both of you need to be happy and it just wasn't happening with me continually bringing my pain into your lives. I love you both._

_Yours,_

_Bella_

I let out a sob and clutched her pillow to my chest. So like Bella to be thinking of others feelings before her own. But didn't she know, didn't she realize that her death would bring on the worst pain of all?

The next envelope was for Jake and briefly I wondered who he was to her.

_Dear Jake,_

_I am so, so sorry. Sorry that I couldn't be to you what you so desperately wanted me to be. I know your feelings towards me changed along the way from friendship into something else. But I could not give you what you needed from me when my heart and soul so completely belonged to another._

_Please know that if only for a little while, you helped. You did bring some sun into my dark world and for that I am profoundly grateful. But the pain and misery of heartache would not go away. It kept getting stronger and stronger until it consumed me._

_Don't feel sad. I will be happier, at peace. And someday, I hope you will share with someone the same love I had with him, even if mine was only one sided._

_Be happy Jake, you deserve it._

_Your Bells_

I gripped the letter tight within my grasp crumpling it. One-sided? She thought it was one-sided? And who exactly was this Jake that was a rival for my love. Though it didn't matter now. Nothing did.

_Dear Alice,_

_What can I say? You were my best friend and my sister and for a little while I felt part of your family To leave so suddenly like you did hurt me but I understand that you did it for Edward as he is your brother and your first loyalties reside with him._

_Please let Jasper know that I never blamed him for what happened on my birthday. I could never be upset with someone for doing what it is in their nature to do. Please don't be too mad at Edward either. He couldn't help that he couldn't love me._

_Let Carlisle, Esme, Emmett and even Rosalie know that I have missed them as well. I am sure this would shock Rosalie down to her toes but she cannot help how she is no more than I can._

_Your sister,_

_Bella _

I was a burning man. Burning in my own misery. These words, Bella's words were wrong. All of it wrong. I did love her. So utterly, so completely. And finally, with dread, I opened the letter that was addressed to me. It would be the most painful yet but I had to know, in the end, what her final thoughts were to me. The page was tear-stained. Bringing it up to my face, I could almost taste the saltiness of those tears on the paper.

_Dear Edward,_

_I almost didn't write this letter not knowing if you would ever receive it or even want to read it but something compelled me to write it anyway. Call me masochistic._

_Whoever said "It is____**better to have loved and lost**____than never______**to have loved at all" was wrong. That person, had no idea what it was like to have loved and lost **__**you**____**, Edward. Even still, I am grateful for the little time you had given me. I felt the kind of love that poets and those authors I read so much only write about; all consuming, powerful.**_

___**You were wrong too, that last day in the forest. Human memories, well mine anyway, are not like a sieve. If that were the case, the pain of losing you would have decreased. It didn't. It got stronger somehow until pain was all I had.**_

___**I always knew that I was on borrowed time with you. That you could never love me the way I loved you. It shouldn't have come as such a shock when you left me. But it did.**_

___**Despite all this, please don't feel guilty as I know it is in your nature to do. It is really not your fault that I fell so deeply in love with you and you couldn't reciprocate. It is better this way for me, for everybody.**_

___**Love always,**_

___**Bella**_

_**Broken sobs tore through my body as I lay in her bed prostrate with grief. She died believing I didn't love her. As if I couldn't **____**not**__** love her. She was my everything and now my everything was gone. How, after all that I told her, could she not think I loved her so completely?**_

___**Isn't that what you wanted her to believe?**__** The little voice inside my head whispered to me. **____**Didn't you think it would be easier for her to let go if she thought that?**_

_"**Not like this." I whispered brokenly shaking my head. "Not like this."**_

_**I didn't know how long I lay on her bed, with her letters crumpled in my hand. I was too far gone to notice the passage of time.**_

_**Making myself get up, I took one last look around the room searing it into my memory. I had one more stop to make, the most painful yet before going to Italy to beg for my death. And then, my pain would be gone as well.**_

_**XXXXX**_

_**Hopefully you like this chapter. Please review. I am curious to know what you think so far.**_


	6. I am Stretched on Your Grave

I have received so little reviews so far and would like to hear more…please!

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_I am stretched on your grave and will lie there forever,_

_If your hands were in mine, I'd be sure they'd not sever,_

_My appletree, my brightness 'tis time we were together,_

_For I smell of the earth and am worn by the weather…_

…_The priests and the friars approach me in dread,_

_Because I still love you, my love, and your dead._

_And still would be your shelter through rain and through storm_

_For with you in the cold ground I cannot sleep warm._

Excerpts from "I Am Stretched on Your Grave" – 17th century Irish poem sung by Dead Can Dance

Bella POV

After we landed in Port Angeles, skipping Seattle all together since we were on a private jet, Alice gave the pilot a very big tip and maneuvered me to the entrance of the airport.

"Wait here." She said "I'm going to rent a car."

I nodded dumbly as she pranced off. Now that we were so close, my nerves were getting to me again. Once I saw Edward, what would I say?

"_I'm not dead so you don't have to kill yourself from guilt. But I will be soon after you leave, so don't even think of going to Italy."_

I shook my head. Definitely not the thing to say. If he knew my plans once he left, he wouldn't go. He would feel too blameworthy and stay chained to my side out of some forced sense of obligation. I loved him too much to do that for him.

A red Mustang drove towards me and the driver lowered the window.

"Get in." Alice said from inside the car.

"A Mustang?" I inquired getting in the car and shutting the door as we drove off.

"Well, they didn't have any Porsche 911 turbos." She made a disgusted look on her face. "And I needed something that goes fast."

"How long do you think it will take to get back into Forks?" I knew normally, it was an hour drive but I was curious to see what time estimation Alice would come up with.

"20 minutes at the most." She said. "In a Porsche, it would have been less." She sulked.

"20 minutes?" I was incredulous.

"I didn't think you would be opposed to Grand Theft Auto, Bella. We don't have much time."

She was right; I wouldn't be opposed to speeding. "Why don't we have much time Alice?"

"He's heading to the cemetery now."She explained. "He read your letters...you're like a sister to me too by the way...anyway he read your letters and he is making one last stop to what he thinks is your grave. After that, we won't have much time."

"My letters, Oh my God! We have to stop at my house so I can get the letters. I can't have Charlie see them." Crap! Why didn't I think to get rid of them? I was in too much of a hurry to get to Ital, that's why.

"Relax." Alice said patting my leg reassuringly. "Edward took them."

This I did not understand. "Why would he take them?"

She sighed and looked upward apparently annoyed. "Really, Bella? Can't you can't guess? They were supposedly you last words, he wants to keep them with him until the end."

"I am confused." And I was.

Alice rolled her eyes then "Because he loves you so completely, you idiot. He never stopped, will never stop."

I shook my head, my brain not wanting to believe the words even if my heart fervently hoped they were true. "No, you're wrong." I whispered. "If he loved me he wouldn't have left. He would have never said those words to me in the forest."

"Oh, Bella, Bella, Bella. He only left because he is a self-sacrificing, arrogant ass." She shrugged her shoulders. "But this is a conversation you need to have with him...and you will."

I usually didn't bet against Alice but I knew in this instance she was wrong.

"I know you don't believe me." She said. "But trust me."

Dare I trust her? Dare I hope? I shook my head, No. If I did, then when he left again the pain would be that much more magnified. I threw myself off a cliff before, If, I allowed even a margin of hope, what would I do when he left again?

Edward POV

I watched from a distance as the cemetery workers shoveled the last of the earth on her grave and wondered briefly how she was found. Was her body discovered on the shore, broken and bruised? Had they thought it was an accident? Clearly no one had found her letters yet. And they wouldn't I thought. Selfishly, I stole them and they would remain with me until I left this world.

There was no headstone yet. No markers to name the grave as hers and it surprised me that there weren't many flowers either. It also astonished me that Charlie had not hung around but maybe the pain was too great at seeing her coffin being engulfed in the earth.

When there was no one left around, I made my way slowly to the grave. It took every mental restraint I had not to dig it up and embrace myself around her cold form and lay there forever with her.

It started to rain then. I turned my face to the sky letting the droplets run down my face. How fitting, I thought, that the heavens would open up and shed the tears for me that I could not. My knees buckled then and gave way until I was kneeling in the dirt that covered her.

This was not how it was supposed to be! She was supposed to live a long, healthy life.

"Why Bella? Why?" I sobbed brokenly.

My hands fisted in the mud underneath me. I wanted to slay myself for my arrogance in believing that her love for me was not as great as mine for her. How could it have been? She was a human. Vampires felt emotions so much more amplified. But then hadn't I always underestimated my Bella. Hadn't she always continued to surprise me?

I was drowning in my grief. I heard light footfalls behind me but they barely registered. I was too wrapped in my own anguish to care who saw me.

"It's not mine." Whispered a small voice from behind me. _Her_ voice. It cannot be!

My head whipped around and there I saw her, standing in the rain. It was impossible. Had the Volturi somehow discovered what I had planned and killed me while I was standing here? I didn't care, I'll take it. But no, they wouldn't do that, out of respect for Carlisle, if anything. My brow furrowed as I tried to understand. This had to be a hallucination. But this image of Bella was nothing like the ones that invaded my mind during my months away. In this hallucination, Bella was gaunt, haggard and dangerously thin, but she was still beautiful to me.

"The grave, it's not mine." My fantasy whispered again. Then the realization dawned on me. The vision on front of me wasn't a hallucination. It really _was_ Bella.

I was on my feet so fast and over to her in less than a second. I had to touch her, _needed _to touch her to reassure myself that I wasn't imagining things. Cupping her face in my hands, I let out a small sob of gratitude that she was indeed real and put my lips on hers.

Bella POV

Alice dropped me off at the cemetery saying she would be back out the house awaiting the arrival of everyone else.

"This is something you need to do on your own." She had told me. "It'll all work out, you'll see. Trust me." And she had driven off into the distance.

It started to rain as I was making my way to the area where I knew the grave would be. Part of me wanted to run to see Edward again but I slowed my steps down and walked softly.

What I saw was nearly the undoing of my resolve. There Edward was, on his knees sobbing, his whole body shaking with the force of it. His hands were fisted in the dirt atop Harry's grave as if he were poised to dig it up with his bare hands.

"It's not mine" I whispered knowing with his vampire senses that he could hear me.

His head turned to me and the raw anguish that I saw in his face nearly staggered me. His brows furrowed then as if he were confused. Did he think I was a ghost coming to haunt him?

If possible, he looked even more confused, as if he were trying to do a very difficult math equation in his head.

"The grave." I said looking pointedly at where he knelt. "It's not mine."

I saw understanding in his features and before I could blink he was standing right in front of me, his hands cradling my cheeks. Then his lips descending on mine and suddenly we were kissing in the rain. This kiss wasn't the passionate yet cautious kisses I was used to from him. No, this kiss was raw. Raw, desperate and hungry and my body responded in kind.

Without any recollection of what was happening, we were flying backwards to the shelter of a nearby mausoleum. My back was pressed against the wall, his body molding against mine, his hands fisted in my hair, his mouth on mine. He pulled back slightly and looked me in the eyes with what seemed like reverence and wiped a tear from my cheek. I hadn't even realized I was crying. What caught me off guard were his eyes. They were black as if he hadn't been feeding and there were dark purple smudges under them. They matched my own.

"Bella" He whispered and his mouth was on mine again. I felt whole again and I wanted to shout from the joy of it. But this was wrong. He was kissing me like this out of guilt and relief. As much as it pained me to stop, I had to. For both of our sakes. This intense display of emotion wasn't real, at least for him anyway. For me, it was what I had dreamed of for months.

I pulled away, pushing him away with my hand against his chest. We were both breathing heavy. His hands still didn't let me go but he had stopped kissing me and was now looking at me perplexed.

"We have to stop." I said and it nearly killed me to say those words.

"Why?" He said leaning in to kiss me again. I turned my head away.

"Because it isn't real." I whispered turning to look at him again, tears making tracks down my cheeks. "Because it's a lie."


	7. You are Everything

_You are everything I need to see  
Smile and sunlight makes her way to me  
Love incarnate looking into me  
Breaths of moonlight washing over me  
Can I show you what you are for me?_

Angel of mine, can I thank you?  
You have saved me time and time again  
Angel, I must confess  
It's you that always gives me strength  
And I don't know where I'd be without you

After all these years, one thing is true  
Constant voice within my heart is you  
You touch me, I feel I'm moving into you  
I treasure every day I spend with you  
All the things I am come down to you

Angel of mine  
Let me thank you  
You have saved me time and time again  
Angel, I must confess  
It's you that always gives me strength  
And I don't know where I'd be without you

Back in the arms of my angel  
Back to the peace that I so love  
Back in the arms of my angel I can finally rest  
Feeling you again around me

Angel of mine  
Let me thank you  
You have saved me time and time and time and time again  
Angel, I must confess  
It's you that always gives me strength  
And I don't know where I'd be without you

Angel of mine  
Can I thank you?  
You have saved me time and time again  
Angel, I must confess  
It's you that always gives me strength  
And I don't know where I'd be without you

...without you

"Angel of Mine" – Evanescence

Edward POV

"Because it isn't real." She whispered turning to look at me again, tears making tracks down her cheeks. "Because it's a lie."

I turned my back to my glorious vision then bringing my hands to my hair wanting to rip it from my skull. Not real?…A lie?

"Could the fates be so cruel to bring me a hallucination that engaged all five of my senses? I couldn't just see her and hear her but I could taste, touch and _smell_ her as well." I said out loud in what could only be a tortured voice.

My angel came around to face me then, grasping my arm. I closed my eyes to dispel the illusion that tormented my very soul.

"Edward, Edward, look at me." Her voice pleaded. I opened my eyes and she was still standing before me. "I am real. Not a hallucination." She smiled sadly then with some hidden meaning I did not understand. "It's this that is not real." She sobbed pointing to me and then to herself.

Maybe she was real, I finally was willing to admit but I still did not understand what she was saying.

"I don't understand." I finally said.

She paused, swallowed and paused again. "It's us..kissing like this…that is the lie."

Was she saying that she did not love me? What about the letters she had written?

"But the letters? I am confused. Don't you love me any longer?" If that was the case it would be painful but I would accept and move on happy just knowing she was alive.

"What kind if idiotic question is that?" She demanded. "Of course I love you."

"Then what?"

"It's you Edward" she said sorrowfully. "It's you that doesn't love me. You had said so yourself. But you must listen to me Edward. You can't go and try to have yourself killed because I wanted to die, you can't feel guilty that you couldn't love me as I love you." Her words broke at the end.

Finally, I was comprehending what she was trying to say and it made me very angry that she could think that way. Didn't she realize the depth of what I felt for her?

"Isabella Marie Swan, do you think that I was trying to kill myself because I felt guilty?"

She looked warily at me now. "Well didn't you?"

"Feel guilty? Immensely so. But that wasn't the reason I was going to Italy."

"Now I am confused."

"I was going to the Volturi because I thought you were dead, because I cannot live in a world where you don't exist."

"But you said…" I knew what she was getting at and I had to put a stop to it right there and clear up any misapprehension.

I cut her off. "I _know_ what I said that day. _That_ was the lie. All of it. I had to lie. You wouldn't let me go otherwise and I needed to leave. I was doing it to protect you. Protect you.." I ended muttering mostly to myself "and I nearly ended up killing us both." I laughed humorlessly. "But to have you believe me so completely, that was excrutiating. Why could you believe the lie and not the truth? Why did it take just one word to break your faith in me, _in us_?"

She looked down but I needed her to see me, to see the truth in my eyes of what I was telling her. I cupped her face again in my hands and made her look at me.

"I always knew I wasn't good enough for you and for a little while I let myself believe the fantasy that was woven before me but when you said it the words out loud, the reality of what I had always knew came crashing down around me." She finally said, her voice pained and it broke my non-existent heart.

"I. Love. You." I said to her. "I am so, so, sorry that I gave you the fuel to doubt that and I will gladly pay the penance for it every day of my existence if you would only spend it by my side."

Her eyes went downcast again but I thought I had seen a tiny spark of hope. I needed to make her believe me fully.

"Please let me attempt to explain what you mean to me." I started trying to find the right words but how can one express in mere words how completely and deeply I loved her, how completely and deeply she changed me. "Bella, before you came into my life, my world existed of only muted colors, shaped and forms. But when I met you, everything changed, everything was clear and bright and vibrantly colorful. When I thought you were…dead" I said stumbling over the word. "There were no more colors, not even muted ones, everything went black. Now that I have you safe in my arms again, knowing you feel the same way, everything is vibrant again."

She looked at me in awe. "That's exactly how I feel."

I nodded. 'Because, we belong together. You are my soul mate Bella. One cannot exist without the other and I am so sorry that I tried to make us do that….I was coming back anyway you know."

"You were?" she asked disbelievingly.

"I couldn't live without you anymore. The pain was just too unbearable. When I received the telephone call from Rosalie, I was already debating on coming to you and begging on my knees if needed, to get you back."

Bella POV

Could what he was saying be true? Oh, I had so wanted to believe that but the overwhelming doubts still plagued my mind. I looked at him trying to read the truth of his words in his eyes. I saw it then, all of it. All of my feelings were mirrored in his eyes. The misery, the anguish, _the love_ and I was once again complete.

"Kiss me" I whispered pleadingly."

His lips bent to hover over mine and he spoke again. "You have my solemn vow that I will _never, ever_ leave you again." His lips were on mine once again, kissing me tenderly. I wrapped my arms around him, never wanting to let him go.

I shivered in his embrace finally feeling the cold and dampness from the weather.

"You're cold" He said rubbing his hands up and down my arms to create friction. "I just got you back, I won't risk you getting sick on me now." He turned around, his back to me. "Hop on spider monkey" He said grinning. "We'll go back to my house."

"Just like old times." I grinned jumping on his back. In the back of my mind I knew there would be a lot of explaining to do about the wolves, Jake, Victoria and Laurent. But I did not want to think about that now. Time for explanations would come later. For this moment, I just wanted to relish in the fact that I was here with Edward as we flew through the trees.


	8. Noticing

Jacob POV

I was still reeling from the fact that Bella just took off in search of that bloodsucker with his "sister". Why had she bothered? Couldn't Bella see that if it weren't for him, she wouldn't be in the pain she was in? I didn't really believe her when she said she wasn't trying to kill herself; that it was only cliff diving like she had seen the other members of my pack do. I almost told her she was full of shit but she had seemed so sincere that I didn't try and push it.

What bothered me the most was that I _had_ thought she was getting better, that the anguish she felt over that bloodsucker was fading, that she may have been falling for me as I had fell for her. It angered me that her loyalties and her heart still belonged to that freak show of an ex-boyfriend. That much was obvious when I witnessed her expression when she saw his sister. I didn't know if I was angrier at Bella or him or myself.

She hadn't come back yet, at least to her house anyway and I wondered if they had been successful. I hoped not. What state would she be left in when he did leave her again, if they found him in time? Why the hell would he kill himself if she were dead anyway? Stupid leech!

If he did dare show his face back here, I would not be responsible for my actions. Treaty or no treaty.

"We can't start a war over this." Sam said coming up behind me. "No edicts have been broken."

I turned swiftly to him. He shrugged. "The pack hears your thoughts, you know." He finished.

"Damn inconvenient at times if you ask me." I mumbled kicking a rock.

"But a necessity." He replied. "Look, Jacob. I understand your feelings, I really do. But if they come back, there is nothing we can do. I won't sacrifice any members of the pack over your jealousy when there's been no breach."

"So what am I supposed to do?" It sounded like a whine and I hated myself for showing that vulnerability to the Alpha. I knew that if I had imprinted Bella it would've been a different story. The pack would back me then but as much as I wanted to I couldn't stake that claim.

"You'll have to figure that one out on your own. But I will tell you, if you decide on any violence against them and they have committed no wrong, we will not back you."

"Thanks for nothing." I mumbled. I could feel his eyes boring into my back as I walked away. For now, I could only wait until I saw Bella again then I would figure out what I would do.

Edward POV

I slowed down as we approached my house that I had not seen in seven months. Satisfied that we could walk the rest of the way, I gently took Bella off of my back and we walked slowly hand in hand. I had an overwhelming need to touch her in any way possible fearing that if I didn't have that physical bond with her, she would slip away from me.

"Did you need to go to your house?" I asked her. "I don't want to get you in trouble with Charlie." Charlie would be angry enough at me as it was and rightfully so. I had nearly destroyed his daughter with my mistake and prayed that even if he never fully forgave me, he would tolerate me on some level.

"No, he probably went back to the Clearwater's after the funeral."

Ah, yes, the funeral, I thought. In my joy at seeing Bella alive, I had not thought to ask whose funeral it was. "Who was the funeral for?" I asked her.

"Harry Clearwater." She said. "He had a heart attack."

"I'm sorry" I said trying to remember what he looked like. He didn't seem like he was unhealthy but I knew that heart attacks can claim anyone at anytime.

"Yeah, Charlie was upset. They were close and he feels like it was his fault."

"Why would he feel that?" I was genuinely curious.

"They were…ah…chasing...ah...someone when it happened." She mumbled, stumbling over the words. There was something she was not telling me but I let it go for the moment. We were closer to the house now and I suddenly had a thought. I had not seen Alice yet. Was she waiting at the house?

"I assume Alice had a hand in all of this." I said with a wave of my hand. I knew she knew what I meant about "all of this."

Bella nodded and she seemed to rush through an explanation. "She was at my house when I came home. After you spoke with Jake, she had a vision that your decision to go to Italy had been made. We were in flight to O'Hare when she realized you were coming back here, so in short, we took a private jet back and here I am." She shrugged.

Yes, here she was and I was profoundly grateful. But what she had been through the past few days to save me astounded and amazed me. If possible, my love for her grew that much more. So, it was this Jake from her letter that I spoke with. I felt a burn of jealousy but kept it carefully hidden. There was one thing I didn't understand however.

"Rosalie." I swallowed almost painfully. Just thinking about what I felt when Rosalie told me the news and what I had confirmed with the boy almost took me back to that dark place. Mentally, I tried to shake it off. "Rosalie said that Alice never saw you get out of the water. That it went dark."

"Jake saved me." She said.

It appeared that I would have to be grateful to Jacob, no matter how much the envy burned like venom in my throat. I had to appease myself with the knowledge that although he was in love with my Bella, she only felt friendship for him.

"Why wouldn't Alice have seen that?' I said more to myself than to Bella. Did her vision cut off before it had finished? I wondered.

She hesitated, seeming to deliberate over her words. "Well, Alice has a theory on that." She started. Did she sound guilty? I couldn't imagine why.

"And?" I prompted.

"And…I'll let her explain that one."

I didn't push but I had a feeling that I would not like Alice's theory.

When we entered the house all was quiet but the coverings had been removed from the furniture and I knew Alice had been there making preparations for everyone to come home. I also smelled food coming from the kitchen and led us both there.

"I guess Alice isn't here." Bella mumbled.

On the table was a bag from one of Forks' many fast food restaurants and a note for me from Alice. How odd, I thought. It must be for Bella. I removed the contents of the bag which consisted of a double cheeseburger, large fries and a vanilla shake. I pushed the food over to her motioning that she should eat as I read Alice's note. Bella waited as I read even though I could hear her stomach grumbling.

_Edward,_

_I am glad you came to your senses. FINALLY! Obviously, the food is for Bella. In case you haven't noticed (but I am sure you have) our Bella isn't exactly the picture of health these days. _

_Be back later with the family._

_Alice_

I had noticed that Bella hadn't looked well, albeit briefly. My mind was preoccupied with other things but now that it was brought to my attention again, I couldn't help but look, really look at Bella. And I didn't like what I saw. My eyes narrowed as I took in the way her normally form fitting clothes hung on her frame, how her collar bones jutted out looking like they might break through her skin, the taut skin stretched over her cheekbones and the sunken eyes with purple smudges. No Bella definitely did _not_ look the picture if health.

I heard Bella's heartbeat quicken and a blush rose to her cheeks. How I missed those blushes! But I knew she sensed that I didn't like what I saw.

"When was the last time you ate?" I asked her sitting down and pulling her into my lap as I brought a French fry to her mouth. "And the sparse peanuts on the plane do not count."

She took time to chew the fry seeming to think about it. "Um…"

"Well?"

"Wait a minute, I'm trying to think" she said taking a bite of the burger.

"It's not trigonometry Bella." I said rolling my eyes. If you don't remember off the top of your head then it's obviously been awhile."

"It was the day before yesterday." She said proudly.

I sighed. "We're going to have to have serious talk."

Suddenly, Bella stiffened in my arms. I had unintentionally hurt her. Would I never stop hurting her? My arms snaked around her and I held her to my chest.

"Bella, I love you. I am not leaving you. I just meant we had to have a talk about what my leaving did. To _both_ of us. We can't move forward until we have that in the open. I won't let it fester between us."

Some of the tension left her body and she relaxed back into me. "Oh" she said nodding in understanding. "Just don't…don't scare me like that again." There was a shiver in her voice, like she was on the verge of tears. I realized that the mention of having a "talk" brought back the memory of when I said much the same thing before I left.

"Oh, love. I am so, so sorry." I said closing my eyes and burrowing my face in the crook of her neck. The burn of her blood was not as strong as it had been although it smelled just as sweet. I supposed the anguish of believing she was dead had overridden any desire to subconsciously hurt her in anyway.

Her hand came up and caressed my hair and I shuddered with the sheer pleasure of it.

"Eat." I growled, mumbling into her hair. "We'll talk later…amongst other things" I said with a leer.

She laughed then, the most beautiful sound I ever heard and popped another fry into her mouth. I heard my family outside, too far off into the distance for Bell to hear.

"Company's coming" I said sighing, knowing our alone time together had come to an end for now.

"We're back!" Alice cried happily swinging the front door open announcing their arrival.


	9. Family Reunion

I only had a brief idea of where I wanted this chapter to go and didn't spend much time with any revisions so I was hesitant to post it but then I thought what the hell. So, here it is. Please tell me what you think

XXXXX

Bella POV

"Company's coming" Edward said with a sigh.

"We're back!" I heard Alice cry happily as I heard the front door open with a bang.

"Be careful Alice." I heard Esme scold, obviously fearful of any damage Alice might have caused the unsuspecting door.

I heard 6 pairs of footsteps come up the stairs, the sounds of Emmetts's nearly drowning out the rest. I tried to get up to greet them but Edward held me tighter to his lap.

"Eat, please." He whispered into my hair.

"But.."

"No buts." He said picking up the messy cheeseburger and holding it to my mouth gesturing me to take a bite.

"I can feed myself you know." Really he was being too much.

I could feel his grin as he sensed my annoyance. "Please, just humor me."

"Bella!" Emmett yelled loudly startling me and making me jump. I turned to see him grinning and could not help but grin back.

"Hey Emmett"

Alice looked at Edwards restraining arms wrapped around my waist and gave him a glare. "You know Edward, it wouldn't kill you to let her go so she can greet us properly."

Edward glared back at her but released me. I jumped up and hugged Alice first even though we had just spent the past 2 days together. Emmett wouldn't be denied though and grabbed me as soon as Alice released me picking me up and swinging me around.

"I missed you Bella." He said. "These guys were no fun without you."

"I'm glad I amuse you Emmett." I said when he finally put me down. "I've missed you too."

Esme grabbed me next and pulled me tightly to her. "Thank you" she said, her voice full of emotion. "Thank you for saving my son." Save her son? I thought. My actions very nearly killed him. She appeared to look at Edward over my shoulder. "And you Edward, don't you ever scare me like that again."

"Sorry Mom." He mumbled and she grabbed him into the embrace as well.

"Bella," Carlisle said taking my hand in his and looked directly at me with his warm butterscotch gaze. "Please know that I speak for all of us when I say that we have missed you terribly and are so sorry for what you went through in our absence."

I heard Rosalie snort in the background. Apparently, not _everybody_ missed me. Carlisle silenced her with his frown.

Jasper seemed the most hesitant to greet me, well, besides Rosalie. He stood leaning against the doorframe of the kitchen eyeing me warily. I was no empath like he was but I could tell he was still suffering guilt for what happened at my birthday party last year. It was up to me to approach him.

"Jasper," I started. "I just want you to know, I in no way blame you nor have I ever blamed you for what happened last year. I blame myself, actually. I am the one that gave myself the damn paper cut." I heard Edward sigh behind me as if he disagreed. "In fact." I said cheerily wanting to lighten the suddenly tense mood in the room." If clumsiness was classified as a disability, I would be able to get better parking spaces."

Jasper grinned then feeling that my words matched my mood, that I honestly didn't blame him. "Alice told me." He said. "But it means so much to hear it from you."

I saw Alice mouth a "thank you" to me. I also saw some sort of silent communication happening between Edward and Carlisle. It looked very serious and I knew it was about me judging by the way Carlisle had glanced in my direction.

Edward raked his fingers in his hair and sighed in frustration. "I'm well aware of that Carlisle." He said. I looked at him. "Nothing, don't worry about it." He said to me. I hated when he kept me in the dark like that as if I was a child that needed to be protected. Before I got a chance to voice my disagreement with him, Rosalie stepped forward.

"I just wanted to say, I'm…"

"Can it Rose." Edward said unwilling to hear her apology.

"Edward, let her finish." I said, not wanting to be the cause of anymore discord in the family.

"Thank you Bella." She said looking at me directly, which surprised the hell out of me. "Look, I just wanted to apologize to you and Edward both. I truly had no idea what he would decide to do when he found out. I just thought he would come home and we could all be together again."

"I told you Rosalie. It told you not to tell him." Alice said.

"You're always trying to coddle him. I just thought it would be better if he knew." She responded haughtily.

"Girls" Esme scolded looking at Rosalie and then Alice.

"Forget it Rosalie." I said "I'm the one that jumped off the damn cliff. I should be the one apologizing."

Edward obviously disagreed judging by the way he shook his head. "You have nothing to apologize for." He said moving behind me and wrapping his arms around me. I leaned back into him savoring the feel of his arms encasing me. No matter how long I lived and hopefully that would be forever, I would never be able to get enough of that.

"Absolutely not." Esme agreed. "Bella, dear, there is no need for you to apologize."

Rosalie's eyes lost any pretense of remorse then and she looked almost smug as her eyes narrowed at me. Her it comes, I thought.

She played idly with the charm around her neck as she spoke her next words. "Well I can't say I'm 100% sorry. In fact, Bella, you should be thanking me. After all, if I never told Edward what you did, he wouldn't be here with you now. So yes, I do believe you owe me a 'thank you' at the very least."

Edward growled menacingly behind me and I heard a collective gasp from around the room. I was so shocked I couldn't think. Carlisle and Esme both looked horrified and disappointed, Emmett looked disgusted with his wife, Jasper's expression seemed to be a mixture of everybody's all at once. It was Alice however, that went in for the proverbial kill.

"You selfish bitch!" Alice screamed at her slapping her so hard across the face, I swore it shook the whole house. "You never cared what it would do to Edward if he found out Bella was dead. You only cared about yourself and your own self centered agenda. You didn't care if it _destroyed_ him. Because of you, it almost did."

Rosalie moved in to attack but Emmett held her back.

"You know you deserved that." He said.

"Are you turning against me too, Emmett?" She said to him.

"No one is turning against anybody." Carlisle said holding his hands up. He turned to Rosalie. "I have to say though Rosalie, your mother and I are very disappointed in you. Why would you deliberately try to hurt Edward this way?"

Rosalie sobbed. "I didn't mean to hurt him, really. I feel horrible that I did. I just wanted everything to back to normal again, like it was before _she_ arrived."

Edward snarled at her.

"And what 'normal' would that be Rosalie?" Alice sneered. "Would it be the 'normal' before Bella when all Edward would do was mope around the house or would it be the 'normal' after we left when he did nothing but lay in fetal position day after day ceasing to even exist before he couldn't take it anymore and just left us. Because, frankly, I can't see the better alternative with either one!"

The mental image I got from that made me wince because it mirrored exactly what I did. This animosity could not go on any longer. I was ruining their family.

"Stop!" I yelled. "Just stop."

I could feel everyone's eyes on me waiting to hear what I had to say and suddenly I felt very small. Disentangling myself from Edward's arms, I moved into the center of the room and looked at them all each individually stopping at Rosalie.

"This has to stop." I said. "You are a family. The enmity is this room is so palpable I can taste it. Families shouldn't be like this, especially yours. I remember when I first used to come here, how so in tune with each other you all were. Don't any of you remember how happy you used to be? Because I do. Rosalie, you were right." She looked at me in surprise.

"Bella?" I heard Alice question me as she took a step towards me.

I held my hand up to her. "Please Alice, let me finish." Rosalie is right because ever since I came into your lives, you've all been miserable. I've seen it happening and I was selfish too because I love you all so much that I didn't want to see it."

"No, Bella." I heard Edward behind me and I knew I couldn't face him. If I did, all my resolve to do what was best even if it killed me (and it would) would disappear.

"May I?" Carlisle said to Edward. He must have nodded because Carlisle continued. He took my hand in his once again.

"Bella, we are not, as you say, miserable because you came into our lives, we are miserable because we _left_ yours. Bella, before you became a part of this family, and yes you are a part of this family, we were all just existing, going through the motions, as it were. Edward, especially. He never felt the joy in anything…until you."

"I just brought him pain." I mumbled.

Carlisle shook his head. "No, you brought him great happiness and opened his heart to feel a love like he has never felt before. Unfortunately when you open your heart like he did, you also leave it open for the other not healthy emotions. Esme and I were ecstatic that you came into our lives. You changed Edward. He was happy, for the first time since he was turned, he was happy and I am thankful everyday for you. As for the rest of us, well you brought back our humanity and perhaps that is why Rosalie feels such animosity towards you. Just being in close proximity to you forced her to remember her own human experiences and she is jealous of yours."

Rosalie, jealous of me? I nearly laughed at the thought. With a hmmph, Rosalie left the room. Emmett went to go follow her but Esme stopped him.

"Don't Emmett. She needs to think about what she has done."

Carlisle spoke to me once again. "I am not asking you to forgive her. I'm not sure I would be able to do that at the moment were I in your shoes. I am just asking that you understand." I nodded at him. "And Bella, don't ever feel have ruined our lives or our family. We love you as our own, dear daughter. Never forget that."

He kissed my forehead and I felt the tears slipping from my eyes.


	10. Telling Charlie

Edward POV

I was glad Rosalie had left the room otherwise I would have reacted much worse than Alice did regardless of what Emmett would do. It infuriated me that she had made Bella believe she was the guilty party in all of this when not one damn thing was her fault. Even though Carlisle told Bella differently, I could still see the doubt in her eyes. There was nothing that I wanted more than to erase that uncertainty from her mind.

_You should get her home Edward. Charlie is wondering where she is. I'll stop over later and we can hunt together There are some things I need to speak with you about. _I heard the warning tone in Alice's thoughts. I needed to speak with her as well. As much as I hated to be away from Bella for even the briefest of moments now, I knew I had to get her home. I also knew that I had to speak with Charlie.

Wrapping my arms around Bella from behind, I lowered my head and whispered in her ear. "Bella, love, I need to get you home. Charlie will be worried."

She nodded mutely wiping the tears from her eyes. "Yes, he'll be wondering where I am."

"Catch" Alice said throwing a set of car keys at me. In a fluid motion, I plucked the keys from the air. Noting the Mustang insignia, I looked at Alice for an explanation. "We needed a really fast car. "She said unapologetically. "And our cars are in Alaska." She wrinkled her nose in disgust.

I waited for Bella to say her goodbyes to my family and we went on our way. I drove uncharacteristically slow wanting to extend every amount of time I had alone with her. If she noticed, she didn't say anything. She just kept looking at me with those beautiful brown eyes of hers.

"I would love to know what you are thinking right now." I told her caressing her cheek with my finger before I took her hand in mine.

"Just that you look thirsty." She whispered. "If it bothers you, being so close to me, I can move to the back seat." I must look worse than I thought because she went to unhook her seatbelt so she could go to the back. My hand tightened on hers to prevent her. I needed her close to me.

"I've never been in more control of _that_ side of my nature than right now. Don't worry about me. Alice and I are going hunting later."

"You better." She said in a reprimanding tone.

I grinned. "So eager to get rid of me are you?"

She looked dismayed. "No, never. I just worry about you."

"Relax, Bella. I was just teasing. I worry about you too. We all do. I didn't want to mention it now but it might be a good idea if Carlisle checked you out."

"Is that what that silent communication was about with you and Carlisle?" She inquired.

"Noticed that, did you?"

She nodded and let out an exasperated sigh. "I'm fine Edward, really."

I wasn't too sure about that but I was willing to drop it for now. It was bound to be a long conversation and we were coming up onto her block. She started to fidget and I could tell she was nervous about confronting Charlie.

"Will I see you later?" She asked me.

Obviously she didn't realize that I would be speaking with Charlie as well. "I'm coming in with you Bella." I told her.

"What? Are you crazy?" She looked mortified as she stared back at me with her eyes wide.

I shook my head. "No, but I have to make things right. It's all part of the penance love. If your father is ever to forgive me, I need to speak with him."

"What are you going to tell him?"

"Mostly? The truth with the obvious exceptions."

"You do remember that Charlie has a gun, right?"

I smiled at her and rolled my eyes to show her I was not worried. "He's not going o shoot me Bella. He's too honorable."

She snorted. "His trigger finger could slip and then we'd have _a lot_ of explaining to do when you don't fall on the floor bleeding." I couldn't help it, I laughed. She was too cute. "What?" she asked.

"You are so adorable for wanting to protect me form your father."

"You find life preservation adorable?"

I nodded and gave her a quick kiss and pulled back before the chaste kiss turned into anything more. It wouldn't be ideal for Charlie to witness me making out with his daughter before my grand apology

"Seriously, Bella. I know he won't forgive me easily. Truthfully, if I was your father, I don't know what I would do but I _do_ know that if I were in his shoes, I would, at the very least, want an apology and explanation as well."

She seemed to mull this over in her head. "Okay." She said finally. "But let me go in first. To pave the way, so to speak."

I nodded. "Fair enough." I got out of the car and opened the door for Bella. Letting her take the lead, I walked behind her. Before she opened the door, she turned to look at me for what seemed like assurance.

"It's okay" I mouthed to her, not wanting Charlie to hear me if he was by the door.

"Dad, I'm home." She called into the house. She left the door open as she proceeded inside. I waited just to the side of the door, out of sight.

"Bella? Where were you? I thought you were going to be there today." He answered her. _She's finally home. I was starting to get worried. Damn Jacob for putting thoughts in my head._

My fists clenched when I heard her father think of Jacob. I knew he was no rival for my Bella's love, but I also knew he wanted to be.

"I'm sorry about that Dad. I kind of ran into some old friends."

_Old friends? _"Bella, you haven't lived here long enough to have old friends." _She couldn't mean? Nah._

"It was Alice." Bella simply replied.

"Alice? As in Alice Cullen?"

_Well, I've always liked her. It was that other one. The one that put her through hell and back. Wait a minute, she said friends with an 's' _I didn't need to see Charlie to know he was narrowing his eyes suspiciously. "You said 'friends'?"

"Uh, yeah Dad. Alice and well all of the Cullens."

"All of them? Even...him?" He said my name with the sound of a sneer. I didn't hear Bella answer so I supposed she just nodded. "NO! NO! NO!" Charlie screamed. "You can't just let him walk into your life again after his leaving _destroyed_ you." _Catatonic, depression, nightmares, hell_

Suddenly I almost fell to my knees from the onslaught of Charlie's memory. Bella being carried in a catatonic state in the rain…the day I left her. Bella, not eating, Bella crying with her arms wrapped around herself, Charlie waking Bella up from screaming nightmares. _Don't go, Edward Don't leave me. _I gripped my head with my hands from the throbbing of it. What had I done? Did I even deserve her forgiveness or Charlie's for that matter? No, I had to make it right. There was no way I would _ever_ leave Bella again.

"Dad, please stop. He's here."

"He's here?" _He's lucky I don't kill him now. Does he think he can just waltz right back into Bella's life and everything is hunkey dorey again? Not in this lifetime buster._

"Right outside and he wants to talk to you."

_Sonofabitch "_Well maybe _I_ don't want to talk to _him_."

"Dad, please." Bella pleaded.

_Wait; is there a spark back in her eyes again? I was hoping Jake would be the one to put it there. Shit! _

I didn't wait for Charlie to answer her plea. Instead I walked right in.

"Hello Chief Swan." I said cordially.

"Edward." He said coldly eying me up and down. _He doesn't look like he did any better. Good. Serves him right for throwing Bella away like yesterdays trash._ I had to hold back from wincing. "How are your folks?"

"Better now." I said. "Charlie, I just wanted to say that I am sorry. So sorry that I left Bella. You need to know that I love her with all that I am and I would never hurt her again."

He crossed his arms over his chest. _Words mean nothing _"I understand your father leaving for his career but what about you? If you love Bella so much, why no calls, no letters, no emails?" _Gotcha! Try coming up with an answer for that._

I knew Carlisle would back me on this so I forged ahead. "Carlisle thought it would be best to break off contact completely. A clean break so to speak. He knows how hard long distance relationships could be and he wanted to spare me that… spare us that. But he was wrong, we all came to realize. I was miserable but I didn't want to contact Bella in case she had moved on."

_She could have, she would have _Charlie thought.

I continued as if I didn't hear his mind. "But I found out she didn't, that she was doing just as bad as I was, from Alice. So we're back"

"Just like that?" He asked. "Dr. Cullen packed up his family and left his cushy job in L.A. because you were miserable." Charlie scoffed disbelievingly.

"Yes, just like that. You see, Mr. Swan, not only do I love Bella but my family does as well" I took Bella's hand in mine " and for our own reasons, we all wanted to come back."

_He does look like hell so maybe he is not lying exactly but _"You hurt my daughter, Cullen, a lot. As her father, I don't know if I can forgive or forget that easily."

"Dad." Bella said.

"It's alright, Bella" I told her caressing the hand that I held with my thumb trying to sooth her. "I don't expect you to forgive, sir. I am only asking for a chance to earn your forgiveness and maybe someday your trust just as I must earn Bella's." She opened her mouth to protest but I tugged on her hand to silence her. Whether she knew it or not, she didn't trust me, didn't trust me not to walk away, didn't trust the depth of my love. But that was okay, I would earn it back even if it took me decades or more to do it. "I know I have a lot to make up for but Bella is worth it."

_Is this kid really 17? He does look miserable. Good. Hmm, Bella looks frightened that I'll kick him the hell out. I should. But look at her. She looks alive again. She looks happy. If I kicked him out or forbid her to see him, I would lose her too. Damn this is hard. _"One chance" Charlie said. "But if you _ever _hurt her again, I _will_ kill you."

I nearly smiled then and Bella let out a sigh of relief. "I would expect nothing less" I told Charlie solemnly.

He eyed me skeptically. "Humph, just as long as understand each other." He turned to Bella then. "What about Jacob?" He asked her. I felt myself tense interested in her answer as well.

"What about him?" She asked.

"He's been a good friend to you. I would hate to see you shut him out now that Edward's back." _Damn, I really had hopes that he and Bella…maybe there still is._

"Dad, he _is_ a good friend but that's all he'll ever be. I've told him that."

_I've seen the way he looks at her. She may have told him but that doesn't mean shit._ "Yeah, but does he believe it?"

I noticed her worry her bottom lip with her teeth and could tell she wasn't sure. For my own sanity, I knew I would have to keep an eye on this Jacob. Maybe Alice would have more information.

XXXXXX

Next up: Angry Alice gives Edward the scoop on Laurent, Victoria and Jacob. Here's a hint: he's not too happy about any of it.

Near future (chapter undecided): Jacob gets physical and not in a good way


	11. Alice Gives Edward A Clue

Alice POV

The longer I waited to get Edward for our little "hunting" trip, the angrier I became with him. As if I wasn't livid enough already. So, when darkness finally fell, I went to wait for Edward on the tree limb outside of Bella's window.

I saw them through the window cuddling on her bed. At least she seemed happier now, though still very vulnerable. Part of me was irked that she could let him off the hook so easily. It was almost like she was afraid to get well and truly mad at him for fear he would leave or because it would cause him too much grief and remorse for him to hear. I did not suffer from any such notions. I could not forgive him as easily as Bella had.

He knew I was out here waiting for him. I was certain he was aware of my angry thoughts. Tired of literally hanging around, I started throwing pebbles at the window. Edward may choose to ignore me but Bella certainly wouldn't. With a smile of satisfaction, I saw them separate after a kiss.

"Alice is waiting." Edward told her.

Bella looked out the window and smiled at me, waving. "Hi Alice" She called out to me happily.

"Hey Bella…ready Edward?"

He nodded curtly and kissed Bella goodbye. "I _will_ be back later, okay."

You most certainly will, I thought. When Edward jumped out the window and onto the tree where I was perched, I briefly glimpsed the turmoil wash over Bella's features at the thought of him leaving before her face went back to normal again. Hiding her emotions from Edward was no good for her _or_ for him. It deeply saddened me that my own brother was responsible for putting that look on her face, for giving her the reason to have that look.

"Can you at least wait until after we have hunted before you rake me over the coals?" Edward whispered to me angrily.

"Of course" I said jumping out of the tree. I needed to be more careful in hiding my thoughts from him on this little excursion until we got a chance to speak.

5 Elk and 3 deer later, Edward and I sat deep in the forest as I contemplated what I was going to say.

"I know you have some things you want to say to me Alice. You might as well get it over with."

So, he knew I was still fuming then. I got up and started to pace unsure of where to start.

"You are an arrogant ass." I finally said. "Who are you to make decisions for someone else, let alone a whole family? We shouldn't have listened to you. I knew it what leaving would do. Do you have any idea what you left in your wake?"

"I think I have some clue." He said softly.

"No, I don't think you do. Because of your egotistical choices, Carlisle and Esme lost a daughter and when you went off globetrotting to God knows where, they lost a son too. They were just going through the motions. Emmett never laughed or joked anymore, Jasper was literally prostrate with grief from the tumult of emotions coming off everyone and even Rosalie missed Bella in her own way. And _me_, Edward, you took away the only true friend I ever had. My best friend, my _sister_. You told me I couldn't even look for her future. Do you know how that made me feel? I couldn't even say goodbye to her. That killed me." If vampires could sob, there would be a puddle at my feet but I couldn't stop now.

"It seems like I'll be busy making amends." He said.

"I'm not done yet!" I shouted. "Do you know she told me what you said that day? God, Edward. You might as well have ripped her heart out with your bare hands and stomped on it. That would have been more humane."

He winced. "I had to say something to make her believe me." He said almost pleadingly. "She wouldn't have let me leave otherwise and we had to go for her safety. It's always been about her. I wanted her to live a normal, happy, human life."

I was beyond irate now. I actually saw red. Was he kidding? "She tried to kill herself Edward. Kill. Her. Self." I said emphasizing each syllable and let him see the vision I had of Bella jumping off the cliff. The agony in his eyes was stark and deep. "Does that sound like a raving endorsement of a _happy_, human life because it sure as hell doesn't sound like one to me?"

Edward shot up to a standing position running his fingers through his hair in agitation. "I made a mistake, okay, a huge mistake."

"One that almost cost Bella her life." I said digging the knife in a bit deeper but my anger had lost much of its edge. I really didn't like seeing Edward in this much turmoil but I had to let him know how I felt otherwise it would just fester between us.

"I know Alice." I didn't know if he was responding to my words or my thoughts. "Both" he replied.

"You underestimated her love for you, you know. She _does_ feel for you what you feel for her with the same magnitude. Well, you read her letters."

He nodded bleakly, patting his chest pocket where they still were close to his heart. "It never occurred to me that she would, that she could. She is human after all."

"Since when has Bella ever been a normal human?" I said grinning for the first time since earlier today. It felt good.

"You were right Alice." Edward said after awhile.

"I'm usually right about a lot of things but what in particular are you referring to?"

"I _am_ an arrogant ass."

I couldn't help it, I snorted. Bella's habits were rubbing off on me. "So we're staying?" I asked him already knowing the answer but wanting to hear it from him.

He sighed then. "I don't have the strength to leave her, ever. I can't live without her and it seems she can't live without me either. In fact, when Rosalie called me, I was already debating coming back. Even if I didn't get that phone call." He said shuddering from the memory. "I would've come back. It was only a matter of weeks, if not days."

"I know" I told him. "I saw that. I just wanted to hear the words from you."

"We'll have to register back at Forks High School. At least it's spring break there now until Monday."

"Monday is in two days." I said trying to calculate. It had been a hectic couple of days so it took me a bit to figure out what day it was. "I am sure Carlisle will make all the necessary arrangements."

Edward was silent seemingly mulling over his thoughts. Even though I could not read minds like he could, I knew there were some things he wanted to ask me. I just hoped he wouldn't over react to the answers.

"When you had that vision" he started, "about Bella…jumping." His features twisted to reveal his glaring torment. "Do you know why you never saw the outcome? Bella mentioned you had a theory although she was hesitant to tell me what it was."

Of course he would ask the question that was the hardest to answer. "This is going to be difficult for you to hear." I told him truthfully.

"Alice, I just lived through a whole day believing Bella was…dead. I think anything you told me now would be anticlimactic."

"I wouldn't be too sure about that." I said under my breath.

"Just tell me."

"Jacob saved Bella." I said simply

"So? Why would you not be able to see that?"

How to explain this one? I thought. "Well, I can see vampires because I am one and I can see humans because I was one but I can't see…" My voice trailed off.

"Can't see _what_ Alice?" He was getting impatient.

"Werewolves." I finished.

"WEREWOLVES!" Edward shouted so loud it echoed through the forest. 'You mean to tell me that this Jacob is a werewolf."

"Keep it down!" I yelled at him.

"Fine" He said through gritted teeth. "Bella's been hanging out with a werewolf?" To say he was horror-struck would have been a gross understatement.

"I know. I couldn't believe it either but there was no disguising the smell and when Bella told me, I kind of freaked out on her."

"I left to keep her safe and she starts hanging out with the most lethal monsters there is besides vampires?" He was incredulous and very angry. "Doesn't she realize how dangerous they are?"

"Obviously not." I shrugged. "She's been hanging out with them for months."

"Them? You mean there's more than one?"

"A whole pack apparently."

"No, No, No!" He shouted stomping his feet at the same time. "I absolutely forbid it. She cannot be near those volatile mutts. What was she thinking?"

My eyes narrowed at him. "I don't think you're in the position to forbid her to do anything. As much as I hate to say it, Jacob is her friend Edward. He was there for her when we weren't."

He flinched at the reminder. "He's in love with her." He murmured.

"So what? She only loves you. Besides, he saved her life. More than once."

He turned to me so swiftly then and I wanted to curse my big mouth. "What do you mean by more than once?" He said his hands clenching into fists.

"Well, you know about the cliffs already. And before that there was a visit from Laurent."

"Laurent? What the hell was he doing here?" he growled.

"He came as a favor for Victoria. He was supposed to bring Bella to her but decided he wanted Bella's blood for himself. Jacob and his wolf friends chased him down and ripped him apart."

"All that agony and torture from being away and it was all for nothing. Nothing!" Edward dropped to his knees with a broken sob. "Is there anymore Alice?" He asked despondently.

Did I tell him? Should I? He was so raw as it was I didn't think he could take anymore.

"Just tell me." He whispered hoarsely. I was looking at a broken man and my dead heart went out to him.

"Um, Victoria was here as well. Just a few days ago. She wants to avenge James. You know a mate for a mate but she managed to get away."

Edward hissed as he looked up at me, his fingers digging into the dirt. "Please. No more" He begged.

I hugged him then wanting to take all his remorse away. I knew he was beating himself up inside. Everything I had said to him earlier, I knew, paled in comparison to self flagellation he was giving himself now.

"There's no more." I assured him as he sobbed into my shoulder.

Suddenly he stopped and looked at me with alarm. "We have to go back!" He said frantically. "I need to watch over Bella. She's in danger."

"She's fine tonight." I promised him. "Do you think we would have gone hunting if I had the slightest inkling Bella was in danger?"

He shook his head. "No Alice. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply that. I just have to get back to her. I _need_ to be with her."

"I understand." I told him. If the situation was reversed I would be the same way. Edward needed to be with his mate. They had been separated far too long.


	12. Nightmares and Paper Airplanes

Edward POV

My thoughts were still whirling with everything that Alice had told me as we made our way back through the forest. I felt like I was in physical agony from the knowledge that all I had done, all the sacrifices I made to keep Bella safe had all been in vain. Had I stayed, I would have been able to protect her from everything and we would have both been happy. Instead, I might as well have sentenced us both to die and I was the judge, jury and executioner. Alice was right. However, arrogant ass was too kind a phrase.

I felt myself move instinctively towards Bella's house as if propelled by some magnetic force I couldn't control almost as if the very nearness of her presence pulled me to her. The need to be with her, touch her after being without her for so long was extremely powerful.

"I guess this is where we part ways." Alice said shaking me out of my reverie. I had completely forgotten that she was with me, so driven was I in my desire to be with Bella.

"Please let everyone know I will see them later." I asked her. "I just have to be…"

She held up her hand silently interrupting what I was about to say. "Say no more. I feel the same way when Jazz and I have been separated for an extended period of time. And I'll do you one better with the family. I'll tell them not to be so hard on you about the last few months. I've already lectured you."

Alice was being too kind. I knew I deserved everything my family dished at me, with the exception of Rosalie. Rosalie could rot for all I cared.

"She will be safe, won't she, Alice?" I asked her suddenly anxious.

She shrugged. "As safe as one can be hanging out with vampires and werewolves." _Tigers and lions and bears, oh my!_

Not what I wanted to hear, I growled.

She rolled her eyes at me._ Really_ "Relax Edward. It was a joke."

"Not an even remotely funny one." I responded gritting my teeth. She should know better than to joke about Bella's wellbeing with me. A thought occurred to me then about the wolves and it scared the hell out of me. "Alice, can you not see Bella at all when she is with Jacob?"

"Sorry, Edward." She responded sadly, looking at me. "Like I told you, her future goes completely dark, almost as if she were…" he voice trailed off.

"Dead." I finished for her suppressing my body from trembling.

She nodded. "That's why I thought she was when she jumped from the cliff. It's really rather annoying to have a complete blind spot like that." She said wrinkling her brows in irritation.

"Hmm" was my only reply. There was no way I would be able to tolerate Bella being friends with the mutt if her future disappeared every time she was with him. To not know if she was safe, hurt or God knows what else would be going beyond the boundaries of what my sanity would allow.

Alice went home and I raced the rest of the way to Bella's house though I had to slow down to a human pace when I got into town. Her window was open for me and I stopped for a moment to savor the fact that after all I had put her through and even though I didn't deserve her forgiveness or her for that matter, she was mine.

I felt panic overwhelm me when I heard Bella's screams. Without care for my human pretense, I ran to her and jumped in her window poised to attack any being that dare harm her. What I found was something I could not fight against.

Bella was violently thrashing around in her sleep, tears leaking from her eyes.

"No! No! Edward! Don't' go. Don't leave me…he's gone, he's gone, he's gone…why couldn't you love me?...why couldn't I be enough?"

I choked back a sob. I did this to her, I thought in utter despair and ran to her, trying to get her to waken from her nightmare.

"Bella, Bella love" I whispered expecting Charlie to come in at any moment to see why Bella was screaming. Listening intently, I just heard his snores. I gently grabbed her shoulders to stop her thrashing, trying to prevent her from harming herself. "Bella, Bella please wake up. It's Edward, love. I'm here. I'm never leaving again. Please wake up."

Bella POV

"_I don't want you to come with us. You're not good for me Bella." I watched Edward as he walked away from me, from us and from all that I thought we were only to find out is was all a lie._

"_No! No! Edward! Don't' go. Don't leave me"_

_My knees buckled and wracking sobs consumed me. "He's gone, he's gone, he's gone…why couldn't you love me?...why couldn't I be enough?"_

_He was back or was it a hallucination? _"_Bella, Bella love" He cried to me. "Bella, Bella please wake up. It's Edward, love. I'm here. I'm never leaving again. Please wake up."_

My eyes creaked open to see Edward looming above me with a stricken expression on his face. I wept when I saw him and he gathered me in his arms.

"You're real. Please tell me you're real." I pleaded.

"Shh" he said and placed a tender kiss on my forehead. "I'm real. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

I pulled back slightly to see the blazing sincerity in his eyes. Letting out a stuttered breath, I wiped the remaining tears from my eyes.

"Okay, I'm okay now." I didn't know if I was trying to convince him or myself.

"Are you sure?" he asked trying to assess my honesty and if I really _was _alright. I knew he could hear my heart racing. "I thought you were going to wake Charlie. There would have been quite a bit of explaining to do if he caught me in your room at this hour."

I shook my head. "He sleeps through them now. He used to rush in here but not anymore."

Edward flinched. "Do you have these types of dreams very frequently?"

I didn't want to tell him that I had them every night since he left. He was feeling guilty enough already.

"Bella?" He prompted.

"Not too often" I said looking away, my voice hitching just a notch but enough for him to eye me suspiciously.

"You're such a bad liar, Bella." He raked his hand through his hair in typical Edward fashion. "Don't tell me you're not letting me know the truth because you are afraid it will hurt me. After everything I have put you through, don't be less than honest to spare my feelings. Please."

I worried my lip with my teeth. The last thing I wanted to do was cause him more grief. He turned my face back towards him and looked at me intensely.

"Please." He said again.

I nodded. "Almost every night."

"Since when?"

"What's with the interrogation, Edward?' Can't you just let it be?" I asked flinging my hands up in the air.

He got up off the bed and started to pace the room. "It's been going on since I left, hasn't it?"

"Edward, stop. Just stop."

He rushed over to me sitting on the bed beside me and tilted my head up with his forefinger. His eyes looked tormented and I felt guilty for putting that look on his face.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered to him.

He closed his eyes tightly as if he were in a great deal of pain. "Don't. Don't apologize to me. You have done nothing wrong. _Nothing._" He said with conviction. "This whole mess has been my responsibility entirely."

"It's not your fault that I fell so hopelessly in love with you. Your parting words last year might have worked with anyone less mental than me." I grimaced.

Edward looked at me with his lop-sided smile. "And I am so hopelessly in love with you and that is _entirely_ your fault. I guess I am just as mental as you are."

Holding my head between his hands, he trailed soft kisses down my jaw line, on my cheeks and finally his lips rested on my mouth kissing me softly. He moved over me then straddling me in between his legs taking care to not press down on me with his weight. I gripped his shoulders urging the kiss into something less chaste. He groaned and I whimpered. One of his hands skimmed down my side to rest right under my breast. Moaning I surged my body upward unconsciously seeking more.

Edward tore his mouth from mine and stared at me with his heated molten gaze noting the quick rise and fall of my chest. I licked my bottom lip. They were swollen from his kisses. We were both panting from unfulfilled passion. He touched his forehead to mine and rolled over to lie on his side facing me, one hand entwined with mine the other caressed my cheek.

"You should get some sleep." He whispered. "I'll stay until dawn."

Sleep? He wanted me to sleep now when by body was burning and throbbing with all this pent up desire with no place to go. He was kidding, right?

"You are kidding? You think I can sleep? Now?" I said disgruntled, stifling a groan. Well, at least he wasn't apologizing. That was progress.

Edward grinned and gave me a quick peck on the lips. Before I could deepen the kiss he pulled away and shook his finger at me like I was a misbehaving child. "Uh, uh uh. Ms. Swan, are you trying to seduce me?"

"Apparently I wasn't trying hard enough." I said frowning.

He chuckled. "Ahh, Bella, how I love you. Now go to sleep." He said and started to hum my lullaby. I nearly cried. I hadn't heard it in so long and my fractured memories of it did not do it justice. Feeling my eyes slowly close, I drifted into a dreamless slumber.

When I awoke, Edward was gone but he left a note on my pillow.

_Bella My Love,_

_There is French toast in the kitchen for you when you awaken. Please eat it. I'll be by later to see you. Perhaps we can go to our meadow. Please take care of my heart, I left it with you._

_Forever Yours,_

_Edward_

I couldn't help the blush that rose to my cheeks or the grin that spread over my face. Just then a paper airplane flew into my window. What the hell? I plucked it out of the air, confused. Written in almost unintelligible scrawl on one of the wings was the phrase "Read Me." Shrugging, I unfolded the paper airplane to read what was written inside.

Bella,

We have to talk. Meet me in the forest at noon.

No bloodsuckers.

Jake

I cringed at the obviously commanding tone of the letter and crumpled it up, tossing it in my waste paper basket. Looking out the window I saw Jacob's retreating form. He didn't look happy.

"Sorry Jake." I whispered. Jake was still my best friend. I owed it to him to speak with him, to tell him about Edward and me. I didn't want him hearing it from anyone else. Jake wouldn't take the news well at all.

The chances that Alice told Edward that Jake was a werewolf were high although we didn't discuss it last night. If that were the case, I had a niggling feeling that he would never approve of me meeting Jake alone. As much as I did not want to worry Edward, I also couldn't hurt Jake by abandoning him. Resolved, I would meet Jake in the forest


	13. Confrontations

Jacob POV

I needed to make Bella see reason. That was all there was to it. She needed to see that I was the better choice for her, that the leech would only hurt her just like he had before. And if I had to use every cruel trick in the book to get her to realize that, I would

It was clear she wasn't in love with me. Not yet anyways. But she could. Couldn't she? I never came out and told her how I felt, just hinted at it a few times and I wanted to kick myself for being a coward. Maybe if I had told her that I was in love with her, the idea of _us_ would be planted in her head and she wouldn't have run back into the ice cold arms of her stinking bloodsucker.

Time wasn't on my side anymore. He was back and because of that sister of his, he probably knew what I was. As his natural enemy, he would never allow Bella to see me. Would she fight him on that, I wondered.

I could still feel her lifeless body in my arms as I pulled her from the ocean. She had lied to me that day. I knew she was trying to kill herself. All for that bloodsucking leech. And she just took him back, no questions asked. That just pissed me off.

I stopped outside of Bella's open window. As far as I could smell, he wasn't there although I knew he had been, probably all night. The thought made me sick. Gritting my teeth against the anger, I threw the note I made into a paper airplane and it sailed into her window. If I wasn't so pissed off, I would be giving myself a high five for my great aim. I felt Bella's gaze on my back as I walked away. I wanted to go to her then but willed myself to wait. My rage was too much on edge to speak with her at the moment and I couldn't risk phasing too close to her. In all honesty, depending on how our conversation went later, I didn't know if I would be able to keep a cool head, even then.

Edward POV

Rosalie came out of the house to meet me as I approached the house. I immediately tensed. Hadn't she said enough? Done enough damage for one day?

_Relax \Edward. _I hear her think as she noticed my none too welcoming expression.

"What is it Rosalie? Another back handed apology?"

"No." She said shaking her head with a self-deprecating smile on her face. "I wanted to speak with you alone, without the others about." _I tend to feel backed into a corner that way and I lash out, saying things I really don't mean._

I sighed. "So talk." I demanded unwilling to give an inch. I knew I was being a bastard but I couldn't help myself. While her actions may have brought about the reunion between Bella and I that much sooner, I couldn't easily forgive her for all that she had done and said for her own self centered reasons. I always knew she was narcissistic but she had never been cruel until now.

She looked down and I knew she was ashamed. Not something she felt too often, if ever. "I just wanted to say, that despite what you think of me, I really am sorry. I had no idea of the depth of your love for Bella, or hers for you for that matter. If I for one second thought you would go to the Volturi because of her death, I wouldn't have told you like I did. It was very callous of me."

I nodded. I couldn't disagree with her. "Yes it was."

A thoughtful expression crossed her face then. "I also didn't really mean what I said earlier about being thanked for you coming back here. It felt like everyone was ganging up on me and I reacted…badly…without thinking."

"I was already thinking about coming back." I told her. With or without your interference."

"I know. Alice told me. We had a long talk. So did Emmett and me. It made me see things a lot clearer."

"I just don't understand why you hate Bella so much." And I didn't. Bella had been nothing but kind to her and Rosalie threw it back in her face every time.

Her brows furrowed. "I don't hate her, Edward. I'm not a big fan, but I don't _hate_ her." She sighed as she shrugged her shoulders. "I suppose much of what Carlisle said was true. Bella represents what I can't be anymore. I know what she wants and what she is willingly throwing away for that."

Unfortunately I knew too although Bella and I had yet to discuss it. If I had my way she would not become a monster like me. But unlike me, she believed I had a soul. There was a selfish part of me that was becoming more evident that wanted Bella to be like me so we could be with each other forever. I was forced to recognize that after I had seen her alive in the graveyard. Believing her dead was the most excruciating thing I had ever been through, a thousand times worse than my transformation. There was no way I could ever go through that again.

"I have no immediate plans to change her." I finally told Rosalie.

"Whether or not you have plans for it, Bella will be a vampire." _Alice has seen it._

"Alice's visions can change. It's happened before."

"I don't think that this is one of those times."

Truth be told, neither did I.

Bella POV

It amazed me that for someone who didn't eat, Edward could cook so well. I knew he was concerned about my weight, that it had dropped so much while he was away but I couldn't help feeling like Gretel in the old fairy tale with the witch trying to fatten her up. I giggled involuntarily. If I was Gretel then that made Edward the witch.

I took my shower, washing my hair with the strawberry scented shampoo that Edward loved so much. I felt complete…whole again but I couldn't help the pessimistic voice in the back of my head. _What if he leaves again? Would I survive a second time around when I barely survived the first?_ The thought would not shake from my head_. How can he want you now that you're broken when he didn't want you when you weren't?_ He promised me, I wanted to scream at the inner voice. _It wouldn't be the first promise he hadn't kept._

"Enough!" I said out loud to myself. I could feel the panic starting to set in. Mentally pushing it to the far corners of my mind, I got ready to meet Jacob.

He was standing there at the edge of the forest wearing only a pair of shorts. He looked grim and as I walked towards him he turned and went further into the woods beckoning me to follow. A wave of apprehension washed over me. Jacob was my best friend but at this moment he scared me.

There was an expression unwavering determination on his face as he stopped and turned sharply to look at me.

"So they're back?" He spat accusingly. I winced at the hateful tone in his voice.

"Yes."

"Even _him_?"

"Yes." I said again.

"And he is back in your life? Just like that?"

What could I say? He already knew the answer. I stayed silent letting him come to his own conclusions.

"I love you Bella." He said after a few moments.

"I love you too Jacob. You are my best friend."

"No, Bella. I am _in_ love with you. There is a big difference."

I knew that, of course I had known that even without him saying the words and stupidly I never told him that we could never be anything than the closest of friends. Selfishly, I had needed him too much and now I've hurt him.

"I'm sorry Jake." I looked down feeling the prickling sensation of tears. "But you know who I love. Don't make me choose because it will be him, it's always been him."

He walked closer to me; almost crowded me and I instinctively stepped back.

"So that's it, huh? He gets to walk back into your life just like that after breaking your heart and nearly breaking _you_ and all is forgiven. I could have given you everything Bella. I still can if you just let me."

The anguish in his voice ripped into me but he had to know the truth. "No, Jake you can't. I don't think of you that way. I never have. That type of love only belongs to Edward and it always will." I swallowed past the lump in my throat. "I understand if you don't want to be my friend anymore, if it hurts too much and as painful as it would be to let you go, I would."

If anything, Jake seemed to get angrier. He barred his teeth reminding me of the wolf he was.

"You tried to kill yourself, Bella. Over a damn bloodsucker" He snarled. "Don't think I fell for that asinine story you gave me about cliff diving for fun because I never bought it." He moved closer to me then. So close, I could feel his hot breath on my face. Before I could move, his hands gripped my upper arms painfully."What happens when he leaves you again Bella? Huh?" He snarled, shaking me so hard my teeth rattled.

"You're hurting me Jake." I whispered. I didn't know if I was in more pain from his grip or from his words that played upon my own insecurities. There would be handprints bruised into my flesh. I already felt them forming. But Jake was relentless. It was as if he didn't hear me.

"And he will leave you again Bella. He will, regardless of any promises he made. What will it be next time, Bella?" He shook me again causing me to bite my own tongue. "Another cliff, a bottle of pills, _Charlie's gun_?" He sneered. "Because I may not be around next time to pick up the pieces for you."

"Let go of me!" I screamed at him. I felt the tears cascading down my face and tasted the blood in my mouth.

Edward POV

_I need to speak with you privately _I heard Carlisle's thoughts as soon as I walked into the door. I followed him into his office. Carlisle was always the most diplomatic out of all of us but the admonishment in his gaze as he looked at me made me feel like a 5 year old boy that just got caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"I'm sorry Carlisle. For everything." I told him

"You put this family through hell." He scolded. "Not to mention what you've put Bella He through." He stopped, shook his head and sighed. "But I partially blame myself for agreeing to what you had asked of us. I knew better and did it anyway. God knows there is enough blame to go around. Alice informed me we are staying?"

I nodded. There was no way I could be without Bella anymore."I can't live without her." I said.

"You do realize what you are saying Edward." _You will turn her then?_

He thought I would change her to be a monster like me. "I don't think I can do that Carlisle."

"So you want me to do it then assuming she still wants this life."

"No, I love her too much to condemn her to this half life."

_I don't understand _ "You said you can't live without her. There aren't any options left."

"I've always wanted her to live a full, happy human life. I still want that. I won't condemn her to be a monster like me. She deserves more."

"So you would condemn her to a life of growing old and frail while you stay young. You think it would make her happy that everyone thinks her mate is her son or grandson as time goes by. Is that the happy life you envision for her because it has already been proven that there could be never anything other than short term separation for either of you?"

Bella wouldn't want that. I knew this. It had always been a bone of contention for her. She wouldn't be happy. But to risk her soul?

"I don't know Carlisle. Selfishly, I want it. I want it more than I have ever wanted anything. But to turn her into a monster like me. How would I forgive myself for that?"

Carlisle was silent for a moment. "Do you think I am a monster, Edward?"

I looked at him shocked. "No, of course not."

"Then why would you think you are? We are the same after all."

"You've never killed anyone." I told him.

He chuckled then. "As much as I hate vigilantism, you have only killed those that deserved it. The prisons are filled with murderers and the Bible even they have souls."

Could it really be as simple as that? Never had I thought that Carlisle was a monster like me. But he was right, we were the same. I felt a touch of elation as I mulled over what he was telling me but I was afraid to embrace it.

_I see I have given you something to think about._

Alice ran in the room then interrupting any further conversation. The panicked expression on her face erased any sense of elation I had started to feel.

"What is it Alice?" I asked her just as anxious as she looked.

"It's Bella. Her future disappears in five minutes."

The wolves, I thought with a hiss. "Where did you last see her?"

"The edge of the forest by her house."

I charged out of the office and put the front door, all rationality gone. She was meeting Jacob, I was sure of it. I cursed myself for not telling her to stay away from him last night. He knew I was back and he would be angry especially given his feelings for her. If he phased near her, she could die.

NO! I would not let that happen. I pushed myself to run faster, the branches from the trees barley an obstacle as I cut through them.

It was then that I heard him before I saw them and what I heard made me want to rip him apart.

"You're hurting me Jake." I heard Bella whisper.

"And he will leave you again Bella. He will, regardless of any promises he made. What will it be next time, Bella?..,. Another cliff, a bottle of pills, _Charlie's gun_?" …Because I may not be around next time to pick up the pieces for you."

I was a second away when I saw his hands wrapped around her arms, squeezing her, shaking her. I saw red. The venom pooled in my mouth and my only thought was to kill him.

"Let go of me!" Bella screamed at him.

"Get your hands off of her!" I snarled at him, shaking in my fury.


	14. Negotiations

Edward POV

"And he will leave you again Bella. He will, regardless of any promises he made. What will it be next time, Bella?..,. Another cliff, a bottle of pills, _Charlie's gun_?" …Because I may not be around next time to pick up the pieces for you."

I was a second away when I saw his hands wrapped around her arms, squeezing her, shaking her. I saw red. The venom pooled in my mouth and my only thought was to kill him.

"Let go of me!" Bella screamed at him.

"Get your hands off of her!" I snarled at him, shaking in my fury. My eyes were focused on his hands that held her arms in a vice like grip and all I wanted to do was lunge at him and rip him limb from limb. There was a small rational part of my brain that held me back. Jacob was dangerously close to phasing and if I made one move towards him, he would. Bella could die if I gave in to my bloodlust.

Much to my relief, he let her go. Stealthily, I placed myself in front of Bella. I could hear her accelerated heartbeat and felt the tremors of fear vibrating through her. "Are you okay love? Did he hurt you?" I spoke to Bella but never took my menacing glare off of the mongrel.

"I'm fine. Edward, please let's just go." She pleaded with me.

Jacob gave me a taunting look practically begging me to attack. _Bring it on Bloodsucker _I heard him in my mind.

There was nothing at this moment that I wanted more but I couldn't risk it. Not here where Bella could so easily be hurt or worse. "You may be willing to risk her safety, mutt but I'm not." I told him.

_Did he just read my mind? _"Ugh, I would never hurt her." He said rolling his eyes.

"Then what the hell do you call manhandling her? A gesture of affection?" I scoffed. Unbelievable.

Jacob relaxed some of his fighting stance understanding that there would be no fight today, not while Bella would get hurt. "I'm sorry Bella." He said looking past me to where Bella stood behind me. "I didn't mean it. I only wanted…"

Bella cut him off. "I know what you wanted Jake but I told you it could never be."

_We'll see about that. _I heard him. My eyes narrowed at him. She told him no, why couldn't he accept that? She was _mine_, has always been and would always be _mine_.

"If that's how you want to play it…fine." I told him throwing down the gauntlet.

_He _is_ reading my mind. Damn him. _"Stay out of my head." He growled.

I could feel Bella tugging on my sleeve signaling for us to leave but I couldn't, not yet, not before I said what I needed to say. He had to understand in no uncertain terms that hurting Bella was an immediate death sentence. Treaty or no treaty.

"Fair warning Jacob. If you ever touch her again, if you even so much as breathe in her direction, I _will_ kill you."

_I'd like to see you try_ He was imagining different scenarios of a fight between us, all of which he was the victor."This isn't over." He said before giving one last hopeful look at Bella and ran off into the distance.

I let go of the breath I didn't realize I was holding and turned to Bella to embrace her in my arms.

"I hurt him so much." She cried gripping her small fingers into my shirt. I sighed. He had practically attacked her and _she_ felt bad that he had his feelings hurt. I wasn't surprised though. It was so typically Bella.

I pulled back from her and wiped a tear away from her cheek. "He'll be fine love." I picked her up in my arms to carry her back to her house so I could check Bella for any injuries Jacob may have caused.

"You don't have to carry me. I can walk." She said sounding so adorably indignant; I just wanted to pull her closer.

"Trust me, I _have_ to carry you." I told her. She looked at me curiously. How could I explain the almost primitive need to hold her, to verify she was safe in my arms? That carrying her, feeling her glorious heartbeat against my chest as if it were my own, was the only thing keeping me from giving in to my primal urges to run after that dog and kill him? "_You_ may not need me to carry you, but believe me, _I_ need carry you." Was all I said and left her to come up with her own conclusions.

Thankfully, Charlie wasn't at the house when we got there although a selfish part of me wished he would see what Jacob had done to Bella. Maybe he would finally stop rooting for him to win her heart and see him for the danger that he was. The irony wasn't lost on me that only mere days ago, I considered myself to be the most dangerous being in Bella's life.

Setting her down gently on the sofa, I pulled up the sleeves of her shirt to examine the areas where I suspected that mutt might have harmed her. My gut clenched in fury and I hissed when I saw the nearly black bruising in the shape of fingers on Bella's upper arms. I should have killed him on the spot, I seethed inwardly.

Bella must have noticed my murderous expression because she looked at me concerned. "I bruise easily." She said shrugging.

"Don't" I bit out trying to control my vehemence at what he did to her. "Don't defend him to me. Not when I can so clearly see how much he hurt you."

Her brows furrowed. "I can't help but think that maybe what he said was right." She whispered her voice breaking.

I tried to recall exactly what he was saying to Bella as I was trying to reach them. He had been taunting her, saying I would leave her again and damn his soul, putting ideas in her head of how she would kill herself the next time around. I sucked in a breath as realization struck. Did she really think I would, that I _could_ leave her again? "No." I said forcefully. "If I have to tell you every day that I am not leaving to make you believe it then I will. I could quite literally kill him for playing on your insecurities."

She turned from me then, hugging her arms around her. "Isn't that what _you_ did when you left?" She said. "Use my insecurities against me? You're not good enough for me Bella, you told me."

I sighed raking my fingers through my hair. "I didn't say that." My memories of that tragic day were so clear, so vivid in my mind. I remembered every word, every thought I had, every expression on her face. I would _never_ say that to her when the opposite was true. "I said you weren't good for me, not good enough."

"Semantics." She said turning to face me again. "It amounts to the same thing."

I couldn't stand the physical separation from her any longer. It had only been moments since I had her in my arms but I craved her touch even if only for consolation that she was still mine. Embracing her, I kissed her forehead. "Bella, they were lies. I didn't mean any of it. I told you that. I'm sorry. It was unforgivable of me to say those things but don't let…him...win. Don't let him plant those seeds of doubt in your mind when the exact opposite is true. Please." I looked into her teary eyes pleading with her to understand. "I promise you Bella. I am not going anywhere. I love you too much to ever let you go."

Bella POV

Oh, how I wanted to believe him. He looked so sincere, so wounded that I doubted him. But he had made promises before and broken them. All in the name of some foolish notion to protect me, but even knowing that, it provided no solace from the memories of the utter desolation I felt when he abandoned me. Didn't he realize that the one thing, the only thing that truly had the power to hurt me was him walking away out of my life? Anything else, even Victoria was nothing compared to that.

If I let myself trust him fully, there would be literally nothing left were he to leave me again.

"You're too quiet." Edward said tracing his finger down my cheek. "What are you thinking?"

"It's nothing." I didn't want to hurt him anymore than I already had.

"Bella." He warned. "Just tell me."

I shook my head refusing to meet his eyes. He tilted my head up to meet his tender gaze.

He sighed deeply in resignation and even without me telling him, he understood. "You don't believe me do you? You actually think I could leave you again."

"It's not that I don't believe you…exactly. It's just that you have made promises before." He winced, remembering. I continued before he could interrupt. "I am sure you mean what you say… _now…_ but what happens if Jasper tries to take another bite out of me or if something else occurs that makes you feel the need for you to leave me again for my own protection?"

He sat down next to me and pulled me onto his lap. "Oh, Bella. I already tried that once with nearly disastrous results. What will it take to convince you to believe me?" he paused momentarily. "Time, I suppose."

I readily agreed, nodding my head. "Time. I can do time."

"I will not attempt to leave you again." He reiterated with so much conviction that I let myself believe him. "Not ever, especially knowing what the outcome would be." It was my turn to wince. I knew exactly what he was referring to. He sighed again, pressing his face into my hair. "You broke your promise too. Nothing reckless, remember? When I heard…what I had seen from Alice…" He shuddered "To think that you would take your own life, Bella. It…destroyed me."

"I'm sorry." There wasn't much else I could say. I wouldn't promise never to do it again knowing if he ever left I wouldn't be able to keep that promise. He must have known or at least guessed because he didn't ask me for it. "So, can I have my stuff back?" I asked with a smile trying to lighten the mood recalling the items he had taken with him.

He looked bewildered at first then a broad smile came over his face. "You've always had them. They've been under your floorboards in your room the whole time."

"They have?"

He nodded. "Selfishly, I wanted to keep a piece of me…of us with you."

Giddy with excitement, I jumped off his lap and ran up to my room with Edward following me laughing.

"Which floorboard?" I asked checking the floor trying to figure out where the loose board was, wondering if I had ever tripped over it since I tended to trip over everything else. Edward moved past me prying open the floor just below my window and pulled out the cd's and the pictures we had taken at my birthday party. When he gave them to me, I looked at them greedily and felt tears come to my eyes.

"Love, what is it?" Edward asked immediately concerned at my reaction.

"It's just that so much has changed since then and yet…"

"Yet our love is stronger, as if that could be possible" He walked over to me and kissed me briefly. "You feel it too, don't you? This overwhelming need to be together, to be physically connected."

I nodded. That was exactly how I felt. Knowing that he felt the same made some of my earlier fears drift away. "So does that mean you'll change me?" I asked him hopefully looking up at him.

I braced myself for his typical retort so it surprised me when he laughed. "It always comes back to that doesn't it?"

"Well, yeah." I wanted to be with him forever and I assumed he wanted the same, didn't he. Forever couldn't happen if I got old and died.

He pulled back from me turning to look out the window and I immediately felt the loss of his embrace. He was going to turn me down again. I knew it.

"It would be the epitome of selfishness on my part…to take away your soul…just so I can have you with me forever."

"Don't you want me?" I asked him meekly unwillingly stirring the painful memory that lay just beneath the surface for both of us. He sucked in a breath and turned to me instantly and I could see the tortured look in his eyes.

"Of course I want you...it goes so much beyond want…I _need_ you."

A thought occurred to me. "Are you afraid that you won't want me anymore, that I won't be me anymore, that I won't smell the same?"

"Don't be absurd Bella. I'll always want you. Of course I would miss your scent and your heart beat, the most significant sound in my world now but you will always be _my_ Bella."

"I don't understand then. You want to be with me but you won't change me? What happens when people think, I am your mother or worse, your grandmother." I said with horror evident in my voice. Was I to look like a dirty old woman with her teenage boy toy? The thought sickened me.

His face took on so many expressions as if he were resolving something within himself.

"Give me five years." He said with a resigned sigh.

I did the calculations in my head. I would be 23 and him 17. "No way. Isn't that like statutory rape?" Of course we were nowhere near that in our relationship not for any lack of wanting on my part. "or..er…something." I amended.

"3 years." He said. Well at least we were negotiating. This would almost be fun if there wasn't so much on the line.

"If you are staying in your teens than so am I. You are aware that you're not the only vampire I know." I said in a mock threat. I wanted him to be the one to do it but I would ask Carlisle or even Alice if it came down to it.

"I'm hurt. Don't you want me to be the one to do it.?" He smiled.

"Of course I do but your options leave a lot to be desired."

"You are still so stubborn." He chuckled shaking his head. "Okay, but this is my final offer."

"What is this? A game show? Edward, show her what she's won." I said in imitation of a game show host.

He laughed then and I couldn't help but laugh with him. Then he turned serious on me and took my hand in his. "Seriously. If you want me to turn you, give me one year."

I agreed readily. I would be nineteen. I could do that. "Done." I said. "Was that so bad?"

"I wasn't finished yet."

"Oh" What other thing could he want other than time?

"One year and you have to marry me first."

I gulped. Marriage? "Marry you?" I was literally dumbstruck.

He nodded slowly cupping my face in his hands. His eyes a molten gold filled with love. "Marry me Bella."

XXXX

Next up: Bella's answer

Back to school

Edward finds out about some of Bella's other reckless behavior while he was away


	15. Time to Think

Edward POV

I took her hand in mine, my decision made. The idea had lingered in my mind since the moment I realized I could no longer resist her lure. The concept had grown and then fizzled with nary a hope when I left. Now that I was back, I couldn't deny it any longer. I wanted Bella for my wife. After reflecting on what Carlisle had told me earlier and what Bella herself had confirmed, I knew there was no other choice, not if we were to both be happy. Time for negotiations, however entertaining they were, was over.

"Seriously. If you want me to turn you, give me one year."

Her answer was quicker this time. "Done." She said. "Was that so bad?"

"I wasn't finished yet." I told her.

"Oh"

"One year and you have to marry me first."

I could tell I surprised her and I suppressed a smile. "Marry you?"

I nodded slowly cupping her face in my hands, my eyes trying to convey to her the depth of my feelings on this matter.

"Marry me Bella." My voice had grown hoarse with emotion and I held my breath waiting for her answer. Surely she couldn't deny me.

But she answered me with a question of her own. "Which comes first the marriage or the year?"

There was no hesitation on my part. There was no way I would wait a year for her to be mine officially. "Marriage."

Her brows furrowed and not for the first time I wished I knew what was going on in that beautiful head of hers. I was growing impatient. She was taking too long to answer and I started to fear her response would not be what I had hoped, what I had craved.

"You do realize that the only reason girls get married at my age is if they are knocked up"

It wasn't a yes but it wasn't a no either. There was room for persuasion. "Are you worried what people will think, is that it?"

She turned from me and started to pace. "Well…that's certainly part of it.

Cursing inwardly, I heard the motor of Charlie's car as it came down the block. I knew I had to leave but I didn't want to leave it like this, with this air of uncertainty between us.

"Charlie's coming" I said and winced at the relieved look on her face.

"I guess you have to go." She said coming over to me and wrapping her arms around me. I held her close breathing in her freesia scent and I didn't want to let go. She looked up at me "Can I have some time to think before I give you an answer?" She asked he brown eyes pleading for understanding.

I kissed her forehead reveling in the warm flesh beneath my lips. 'Take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere." I gave her a half smile then "Well figuratively anyway. I do have to go home now. It wouldn't be good if Charlie caught me in your room."

"I know." She said holding me tighter. "So I guess you'll be going into school early tomorrow to re-register."

"Yes. Just Alice, Jasper and myself. Emmett and Rosalie are supposed to be a college." I said with a smirk.

"Will you come by later after Charlie goes to sleep?" She sounded hopeful and a bit uncertain.

"Nothing could keep me away." I heard the front door open and Charlie walked in the house.

"Bella!" he yelled out. "Bella are you here?"

"Down in a minute, Dad!" Bella yelled back. "I guess you should go." She said to me with a frown on her face.

I nodded hating the thought of being separated from her once again. Could vampires get separation anxiety? "Yes, I should…but first I want to do this." I bent down and kissed her as deeply and passionately as I dared. I felt her response, felt her body lean into mine and wanted nothing more than to push aside my carefully laid boundaries. My tongue moved across her lips seeking entry into her mouth and she gave it willingly. I groaned tasting the warm honey of her mouth and pressed my body closer. Unconsciously, I grinded my hips against hers and smelled the sweet ambrosia of her arousal. I knew I had reached my limit. When I pulled away, we were both breathing harshly.

The passion glazed look in Bella's eyes and the pout of her kissed swollen lips were nearly my undoing. If I didn't leave now, the results could be disastrous. I still didn't trust myself in that regard. "I really have to go." I whispered huskily. With one last caress to her cheek, I jumped from the window already missing her touch.

Alice POV

Stupid, stupid man! I kept repeating to myself pacing back and forth waiting for Edward to come back so I can tell him what I thought in person. He could have asked my advice but nooo; he had to wing it and botched it all. Thankfully, all was not lost.

I heard Edward approach and as soon as I saw him walk in the door, my temper got the best of me and I slapped him upside the head.

"Ow! Alice. What did you do that for?" He seemed genuinely surprised and more than a little annoyed.

"What the hell was that?" I countered. _For someone so smart you can be so dumb._

"If I knew what you were talking about I'd answer you." He growled.

"You call that a proposal, Edward? What girl in her right mind would accept a half assed proposal like that? You didn't even ask. You demanded. As part of a stupid negotiation no less. Ugh." I said disgustedly throwing my hands in the air.

He grimaced raking his fingers through his hair. "Okay, I'll admit. I botched it. It wasn't like I planned it…not really. It just came out."

_No kidding. I expected better from you. _"Well, I'm sure we can fix this."

"We?" he didn't sound too enthusiastic for my help and I narrowed my eyes at him.

"You've already proven you can't do this on your own. You didn't ask her for one" I starting counting off on my fingers of each element that went wrong. "Two, where were the flowers, Edward? A girl likes to have flowers."

"Bella is not like other girls, Alice. She doesn't go for all that stuff." He was sounding more exasperated by the minute. I watched him almost gleefully.

_Thankfully, I'll have lots of time to teach her. _"And third and most important Edward, THERE WAS NO RING! How can you expect to propose without a ring?" I shouted.

"Who's proposing?" Emmett said coming into the house and literally plopping himself down on the couch with his feet automatically settling on the coffee table.

"Feet on the floor, Emmett." Esme said walking in behind him.

"Sorry." He put his feet on the floor. "So who's proposing?" he repeated.

"Someone's proposing?" Esme asked.

"Edward." I announced smugly.

I watched a bright smile light up Esme's face. "Oh, Edward that's wonderful. I know she'll say yes."

"She would have already if he didn't screw it up." I muttered under my breath.

Emmett guffawed loudly. "What did ya do bro? Go all caveman and demand marriage?"

"Essentially." I answered.

If possible, Emmett laughed louder.

"What's going on?" Rosalie, Jasper and Carlisle asked simultaneously coming in following Esme.

"Our Eddie here is getting married." Emmett never could resist gossip.

"Thanks Alice" Edward said sarcastically. I could tell he was uncomfortable and felt sorry that I opened my mouth.

Leaving our family to their own reactions, I grabbed Edward's hand and pulled him up the stairs with me.

"We have some planning to do." I told them over my shoulder.

Edward was grumbling behind me. Poor Edward didn't like to be on display anymore than Bella did.

"So what happened with the wolf?" I asked curiously because I couldn't see anything of that confrontation though I knew that obviously nothing extreme happened or we wouldn't be discussing marriage plans.

Edward growled and his body tensed. Maybe I was wrong. "He had his hands on her Alice. He _bruised_ her…badly. I wanted to kill him. I really did. But I stopped myself." His fists clenched at his sides.

_Good thing too, Edward. Things would have been very bad if you didn't. _"She is okay then, right?"

"Physically, she'll be fine." He shook his head then "But the things he was saying to her Alice. They were cruel and completely unjust. I won't repeat what he said. I don't think I can force the words through my mouth but suffice it to say, it left her badly shaken, especially in her trust in me."

"That's why you have to do it right this time." My mind quickly flitted through different scenarios all meeting with Edward's disapproval judging by the expression on his face. Then my mind settled on the meadow…their meadow and was met with a smile. The meadow would be in bloom of course so the flowers requirement was met.

"Of course" he said in wonder. "That's _perfect_."

I am a genius, I thought congratulating myself. "Now you just need a ring. Something from Tiffany's perhaps?" I queried.

"No." He said thoughtfully with a small smile. "I have something much better."

I followed him to his room where he pulled out a velvet box from his drawer.

"I was still debating when I took this from the safety deposit box at the bank yesterday." He opened the box to reveal an exquisite long oval ring that glistened with stones. "It was my mother's." he said softly with reverence in his tone. "I had always imagined giving it to the woman I was going to marry, to Bella" He amended. "And now, over 100 years later, I finally get the opportunity." He gave a lopsided grin.

"Oh Edward. It's beautiful. I am sure she'll love it." And it really was perfect. I could see it on Bella's finger without a doubt. As to when, well that was another story.

"Can you see Alice? Do you know if she'll accept?" He sounded so hopeful and so uncertain; I didn't want to disappoint him.

"She hasn't made her final decision yet so I can't tell you that." I tried for a vision, hoping to block him from my mind at the same time. "She's making a list." I said amused. How typical of Bella.

"A list." He responded his voice flat.

"Yes, a list. Of pros and cons. Why she should and why she shouldn't… _right now_" I said emphasizing the last 2 words to let him know that no matter what the outcome was now, she _did_ eventually intend to marry him.

I could tell by his tense body language that he wasn't at all amused that I was keeping him from my thoughts.

"And?" He asked through gritted teeth.

The list was really funny actually. On one side there really was only a few cons; too young, gossip and _that_ girl? The last one I didn't get. On the pros side, all down the page listed Edward Forever.

"And" I said "I would say the odds are in your favor."

Bella POV

I had hidden my pros and cons list in my drawer. I knew Edward would respect my privacy but I didn't want to take the chance he would accidentally see it and question me about it. There was no denying that I did want to marry Edward. That desire had always existed but now with the actual question laid right out in front of me, I couldn't help but be hesitant. What if I wasn't _enough_ for him? Pulling the list from my drawer, I quickly wrote that on the cons side and tucked the list away again.

When Edward came back later that night there was no more talk of marriage or vampire transformations. We just laid in a comfortable silence on my bed, arms wrapped around each other, lightly kissing and caressing each other. He was always careful to stay within the limits of his self control and it irked me that he was able to when I had such a difficult time respecting his boundaries.

As we lay there, my mind wandered to thoughts of school in the morning and the questions from our classmates and friends that Edward's sudden return would inevitably bring. As if sensing my inward frown, Edward traced his finger down my cheek in a comforting gesture.

"Why do you look so troubled?" Edward asked. I could hear the concern in his voice and debated on whether or not I would answer truthfully.

"It's nothing" I finally replied feeling a slight blush rise to my cheeks. His lips flattened into a thin line. Apparently he wasn't happy with my answer.

"Bella, please be honest with me."

I sighed looking up at the ceiling. "If you must know, I was thinking about tomorrow."

"What about it?"

Obviously, he wasn't as concerned as I was. Didn't he realize that he would be faced with at school? "It's bound to be tough…for you I mean. I'll be on the receiving end of lots of questions about your return but at least I won't be able to read their minds. I just want to warn you that it may not be very pretty."

Although I couldn't see into my friend's minds, I could guess what types of memories they would recall of the toll Edward's departure had taken on me.

"I didn't expect it to be. I am sure though whatever I hear will be no less than what I deserve."

"How can you be so nonchalant about it?" I asked turning to look at him.

It was his turn to sigh. "Bella, love, what I did to you was unforgivable." I opened my mouth to interrupt him but he silenced me by placing a finger over my lips. "Let me finish. I thank the heavens above that you could forgive me so easily not that I am worth of it in the least. Even if you had not, I would never stop trying to gain it but I never expected others to grant me that same forgiveness. I deserve every bit of censure I get. I know it will be difficult to hear but I need to hear it, none the less."

"And I thought I was masochistic." I told him.

He smiled at me then kissing me on the forehead. "Let's not talk anymore if this. You need your sleep."

He started to hum my lullaby and I slowly drifted off into oblivion.

When I woke up in the morning, Edward was gone as I knew he would be but I still felt the loss of his presence. For the first time in a long time I was grateful for the chilly wet air that embraced Forks for I could wear a long sleeve shirt that covered up the dark bruises that Jake had given me. _Jake._ I thought wistfully and angrily at the same time. In one afternoon, he had effectively ruined our close friendship. I supposed I had played a large part in that but that didn't lessen the hurt I felt over his actions.

Edward's Volvo was parked in its usual spot as if he had never left. As soon as I walked into school, Jessica and Angela both ran up to me. Angela looked concerned but Jessica had what could be considered a malicious gleam in her eye. I didn't need Alice's gift to know that she couldn't wait to inform me of Edward's return and not in a way that was compassionate.

"Hey" I said in greeting, playing it off as if I didn't know anything.

"Bella" Angela looked at me. "I just wanted to warn you that…" Her voice trailed off as her eyes narrowed staring off at some point behind me. I could sense rather than see Edward coming up behind me. I felt his arms circle around my waist as he bent down to kiss my head.

"Hello, love." He whispered to me in that soft velvety voice that always reduced my legs to jello. I leaned back into him.

"Hi back." I said.

Angela's eyes were still narrowed and she looked like she was poised to say something. Jessica's mouth had gaped open, the malicious gleam turned to shock. I felt some inner satisfaction to her stunned reaction.


	16. School Days 1 Angela's Warning

Edward POV

At the administration office I put my dazzling skills, as Bella affectionately called them, to use to arrange my new school schedule to match Bella's. Under Alice's advisement, the only class I would not be sharing with Bella was gym. Alice had sighted that due to my over-protective nature where Bella was concerned; being in the same class where there was even the smallest threat of bodily harm would not bode well for our other classmates. I had to agree with her. Given Bella's less than coordinated nature, even track and field could become a contact sport

We had gotten to the school early enough so we weren't bombarded by the inquisitiveness of other students but as the clock progressed nearer to the first bell, more and more students started to filter in bringing with them stares and ultimately questions that I really did not have the inclination to answer. Behind their prying questions, however, were accusations and memories.

I had expected this, even braced myself for it but for each former classmate I passed came on onslaught of guilt so staggering, I felt like Atlas himself with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Their memories of Bella after I had left were much worse than what I had been told.

_Bella staring mutely out the window_

_Bella sitting alone at our old lunch table_

_Bella, arms wrapped around her thin body as if to hold it together._

I didn't know what affected me the hardest, the visual recollections or the accusations swirling around in the heads of every person, even the teachers, that I passed. It was then that I saw Bella at the opposite end of the hallway. She was being approached by Jessica and Angela. I knew Angela had seen me because her eyes narrowed.

"_I don't care how scary he is. If he hurts her again, I'll kill him." _I almost smiled at her words. She sounded like a mama bear protecting her cub and once again I was grateful Bella had a friend like her. It was the other one, I could do without. Why Bella chose to be around Jessica had always baffled me.

"_Maybe I'll get a shot now. I mean he dumped her right. I am much prettier than she is…especially now." _I wanted to growl at her. She didn't even compare to my Bella. Even if her features could be considered pretty, as soon as she opened her vile mouth, it branded her for the ugly vindictive bitch that she was.

Coming to stand behind Bella, my arms circled around her waist as I bent down to kiss the side of her head.

"Hello, love." I whispered to her. She smiled and leaned back into me slightly and I couldn't help but inhale her sweet scent. For some reason, it had a calming effect on me

"Hi back." She said.

Angela's eyes were still narrowed and she looked like she wanted to say something out loud to me but her mouth remained in a grim line. It didn't matter. Her thoughts were as loud to me as if she were speaking. "_I won't say anything in front of Bella, but I got my eye on you mister"_

Jessica's mouth had gaped open, the malicious gleam in her eyes turning to shock. I gave her a fixed stare. Did she really think she was fooling anybody, especially me, with her falsely sweet nature?

"Catching flies, Jessica?" I queried innocently. I heard both Bella and Angela try to suppress a giggle. Jessica abruptly closed her mouth. I knew she was feeling foolish and rightly so.

Satisfied that I shut her up for now, I turned my full attention to Bella. I noticed she opted for a long sleeve shirt to cover the bruises on her arms. I imagined they had not faded much for I could still feel the intense heat of them under her skin.

"Ready to go to first class?" I asked her.

She gave me a happily surprised look. "You're in my first class?"

"I am in _all_ your classes." I told her smugly. "Well…all except gym." I shrugged. I wouldn't bother explaining to her the reason why.

Bella looked relieved. "That's great."

I heard Jessica snicker under her breath. It was so low neither Bella nor Angela heard it. "_Too bad. If he saw what a klutz Bella really was compared to me he so would not be interested in her." _I glared at her she instinctively took a step back.

Alice and Jasper approached us then. _Be nice Edward. _She warned. _No matter how much you want to throw her down the hall like a bowling ball. It's bad form._

"Hi guys." She trilled happily. "I am so happy to be back. Californians are sooo fake. I much rather be where people are natural."

It was my turn to snicker. Alice definitely had a way of putting people in their place in the nicest possible way. A talent I never had the patience for.

Jasper only nodded a terse greeting to Jessica. "Hi Angela, Hey Bella…long time no see."

Bella, as if on cue, rolled her eyes. "You just saw me the other day, Jasper." She laughed and I knew she was playing along with us. Maybe she was aware of who Jessica really was a just dealt with her anyway. It was something Bella would do.

Most of the morning passed without incident although there were a few times I wanted to slam my fists into some of the other boys that still had loud vulgar thoughts about Bella even though it was clear that she was with me. If Bella noticed the tension in me every time some boy talked to her, she never said anything. I must be a better actor than I thought. It seemed all every teacher could concentrate on was college applications and driving the need to get them out promptly if they hadn't been already. I made a mental note to ask Bella, which, if any, colleges she had applied to. Maybe I could convince her to apply to Dartmouth. I always liked New Hampshire and I knew she would too.

When Bella went off to gym, the period before lunch, I went out to my car to sit out the 45 minutes until I saw Bella again. I inserted Vivaldi's Four Seasons hoping that it would put me in a better mood. From my rearview window, I could spot her antiquated Chevy truck whose only redeeming quality as far as I was concerned was it would barely sustain any damage if in an accident. I cringed at the thought of Bella driving down an icy Forks road, swerving and hitting a tree. It occurred to me then that while the truck wouldn't be harmed, Bella would. The thing was so old, it didn't have air bags.

I pressed Emmett's number on my cell phone, an idea coming to my head.

"Emmett. I need you to do me a favor." I said speaking quickly.

"Hello Edward, I'm fine and how are you?" He said sarcastically.

"Sorry" I apologized.

He snickered. "What do you need bro?"

"Do you think you can ask Rosalie to put install airbags into Bella's truck? She owes me."

"Are you insane? Why don't you ask her yourself or better yet just buy Bella a brand new car?"

I rolled my eyes even though Emmett couldn't see me. "As if Bella would ever let me do _that. _And Rosalie might do it if you asked her."

"Yeah and bears don't shit in the woods." Emmett could be so crass sometimes.

"Please."

"Fine but then _you_ are the one that owes _me_."

"Done." I said quickly.

He let out a loud guffaw and hung up the phone most like amused at his own private joke. It didn't matter, as long as I knew Bella was safe, that was all I cared about. I closed my eyes letting the music soothe me.

There was a soft knock at the window of my car. Turning to view the intruder of my peace, I saw Angela, she looked both determined and frightened. I lowered the car stereo and opened my window to her.

_You can do this Angela, you must. For Bella._ Suddenly I got it. She was on a mission of warning.

"What can I do for you Angela?" I asked trying to be as unintimidating as possible. She backed up a couple of steps, no longer looking so determined. Then she straightened her back in her resolve. I was almost amused.

"I just wanted to say if you intend on hurting her again or leaving her again, you might as well go back to where you came from and not look back."

"I'm not leaving her again." I told her sincerely. As far as not hurting her, I did not know how to promise that. It seemed that I was always hurting her, no matter my good intentions. Yes, the road to hell was definitely paved with good intentions. Hadn't I already proved that?

She nodded stiffly. "Well, that's that then. I'll be watching you." She threatened and turned away. It was then that I felt the need to ask Angela what when on in my absence. After all, besides Alice, she was Bella's closest friend and probably would have more information than Charlie. She would also be brutally honest, not trying to spare my feelings. Knowing Bella, she would have tried to protect him from her pain. Who better to ask? I didn't question why I felt the need to torture myself this way.

"Angela" I called to her as she was walking away. She pivoted on her heel and looked at me warily. "Please tell me what happened to Bella when I left."

_Should I?I don't think Bella would want him to know that. Maybe he should hear it. It would serve him right. _

Angela strode up to me and looked at me very seriously. "Do you know what it's like to watch a person die a slow death?"

The dim human memory of my mother came back to me. Her will to live diminished with each wracking cough that tore through her sick body. I watched helplessly just a few days behind her from the same fate. Mutely, I nodded at Angela.

A sympathetic look came over her features. _Oh he must be thinking about his parents. Should I even continue? _Despite her internal uncertainty, she went on. "That's what it was like." She said gravely. "After the search party found her, she was out of school for a week."

This new piece of information shocked me to my core. "Search party?" I asked managing somehow to get the words out of my mouth. Why was it necessary to have a search party to look for her?

"Yes…er…on the day you left, Bella kind of disappeared. Charlie was frantic. No one knew where she was. Ben and I even helped to look. She was found later that night, deep in the forest by one of the Quileute boys. Physically she was okay with the exception of a few scratches but it wasn't her physical state that scared everybody." Angela shuddered from the memory and I saw what she had seen. Bella being carried out of the woods. Her eyes were open but looked like they saw nothing. One would almost think she was dead except she was speaking. "_He's gone. He's gone"_

How could she have gotten lost in the woods that day? I had spoken to her within full view if her house. Unless…unless she tried to chase after me. Again it struck me what a stupid fool I was to have ever left in the first place.

Angela waited while I absorbed what she had said and continued. "From what Charlie had told me, Bella had given up all together. She didn't eat, didn't talk and on those rare occasions where she actually slept, she suffered from horrific nightmares that made her wake up screaming. I visited her that week she wasn't at school hoping to coax a response from her but…there was nothing. It was Bella's body but Bella was gone." She sounded sad as if recalling the memories were going to make her cry. Hell, I wanted to cry if I could.

I saw her through Angela's eyes, rocking back and forth on the rocking chair in her room, arms wrapped around herself, a dead, haunted look in her eyes. I recognized that look. It was the same one that had been on my own face since I had left. All the time I had been away, I never once thought that Bella would wear the same expression. And once again I wondered how I could have been so blind.

"Surely she improved after time." I said. I couldn't believe, wouldn't let myself believe that Bella could be like that for seven months even though I had been, even though her attempted suicide was what provoked our reunion in the first place.

"It depends on what you mean by improve." Angela said wryly. "She did come back to school and went through the motions, only speaking when spoken to trying to stay below the radar of any potentially concerned teacher and most especially Charlie. Every day, at lunch, she would sit at your old table, _alone_. Like she was waiting for you. As I said, Bella but not _Bella_."

It very nearly broke my dead heart to hear this and I almost asked Angela to stop but I didn't. I had to know. It was very painful, extremely, so but _nothing_, no torture could _ever_ compare to what I felt when I thought Bella was dead. So I let Angela resume, masochist that I am.

"This went on for a few months. Then out of the blue, she asked Angela to go to a movie in Port Angeles with her." _I wished she would have asked me instead…maybe then… _"Well the next day Jessica seemed kind of freaked out about the whole thing."

That in and of itself didn't surprise me, Jessica would freak out over a hair out of place, she was much like Rosalie in that fashion; consumed by her own appearance except Rosalie lacked the ditz factor but it was the tone of Angela's words that set me on edge. "What happened?" I couldn't help myself from asking. Judging from the expression on Angela's face, did I really want to know?

"Jessica told me that after the movie Bella approached this group of guys on motorcycles, claiming she knew them."

That threw me off guard as I remembered the night in Port Angeles, the night everything had changed for us. I had just rescued her from a group of ruffians that had intended her harm. Was this the same group she thought she was approaching that night? I was glad that Angela could not see my hands as they were surely making holes in the leather of my seat.

_He looks very angry. Perhaps I should stop. _"Should I go on?" She asked tentatively sensing my mood.

"Please" I whispered hoarsely fighting to retain my composure.

"She took off with one of them on the back of his motorcycle. Didn't come back for 20 minutes. Angela yelled at her of course but Bella really didn't seem fazed by it. It was after that night that Bella started hanging out with one of the boys from the reservation, Jacob Black, I think his name is. Anyway, she appeared to get a little better, more like Bella but different in many ways. I almost fooled myself into thinking she _was_ better but I knew that wasn't the case."

"How could you tell?" I asked curiously. My mind reeled. Bella on a motorcycle with a complete stranger? Just the images of it and the possibilities of what could have happened made my guts churn in dread.

Angela smiled sadly then. "Every once in a while her mask would slip and I would see that girl again, the one that was broken and found in the forest."

We were both silent then as Angela. It was not a pretty tale and not an experience I would wish on my worst enemy and here I sat, the one that claimed to love her above all else and it was _me_ that had put her through that.

"So now you know." Angela said nearly whispering.

"So now I know." I murmured repeating her words. And I wished I didn't.

"Uh, Edward, I have to go and meet Ben before lunch. Please don't tell Bella that I told you all this." _Knowing her she would feel guilty that I told him about the pain he caused._

Apparently I wasn't the only one who knew Bella was selfless. No, these were not things that Bella would tell me on her own. "Don't worry. I won't. "And Angela? " I called to her as she turned away. She looked back at me. 'Thanks."

She nodded once and walked away leaving me with my guilt and my shame. Shame because I had accused her for lacking faith in my love; that she could so easily believe the lies I told her when in fact it was _I _that lacked faith in _her_ love. I had foolishly let myself believe that she would forget and move on like others of her kind would do. Since when had Bella ever been like other humans? Wasn't that part of the reason I loved her so much? I had underestimated her once again.

The ringing of my cell phone distracted me from my morose musings. It was Alice.

"Get your brooding butt to the cafeteria, Edward."

"I'll be right there." I replied. It was time to see my Bella again.


	17. School Days 2 Bella's Anger

Bella POV

Alice, Jasper and I stood on the line waiting to have our meals rung up at the register. I sensed rather than saw Edward enter the cafeteria due to the increase of buzzing conversation around me. He slipped in line behind me placing a kiss on the top of my head.

"Hi" I said smiling and automatically leaned into him. Somewhere in the vicinity I heard Jessica make a gagging noise and I rolled my eyes at her display of immaturity.

"She just wishes she were you." Alice whispered to me under her breath but loud enough that Jessica could hear.

"Hey, no cutting Cullen!" Mike Newton shouted from behind us.

"It's not cutting if we're on the same tab." Edward retorted back which surprisingly shut Mike up. He then sighed deeply sounding almost disappointed or exasperated, I couldn't tell which and before I knew it Edward put 2 slices of pizza on the tray next to the lone apple that I had put there before he arrived. Of course, I thought. I'm not even allowed to make my own decisions about what to eat.

"I'm not going to eat all of that." I told him.

"Don't be absurd, Bella. One slice is for me of course."

"Of course" I muttered. "I suppose you're paying as well."

In answer to my statement, he already had taken out his wallet and gave the money to the lunch lady. For some reason Jessica and Mike joined Angela, Ben, Alice, Jasper, Edward and I at the lunch table. I knew the next 45 minutes would be awkward at best. My eyes darted between the pizza and the apple on my tray and in an act of what I knew was childish defiance, I took a big bite of the apple completely ignoring the pizza. I could feel Edward's disapproving gaze on me as I chewed but at that moment, I didn't care.

"I got my acceptance to UCLA over the break." Jessica announced excitedly.

"That's great Jess." Angela told her. "I'm still waiting to hear back from my schools."

"Do you know where _you're _going Bella?" Jessica asked me.

Startled by the question, I started to choke on the half chewed chunks of apple in my mouth. College was something that was not on the list of my priorities over the last several months especially when getting out of bed in the mornings had been a challenge. I think Jessica knew this judging by the malicious gleam in her eye as she looked at me smugly.

"Are you okay Bella?" Edward asked alarmed, gently patting my back.

I nodded as I coughed once more. The apple I had begun to eat so heartily now felt like a piece of lead at the bottom of my stomach as I realized where this conversation was heading. I hadn't told Edward that my grades had been less than stellar this year in his absence. It would only cause him more guilt and he was harboring enough already. The truth was I hadn't planned on having _any_ future until a few days ago. They all were looking at me expectantly, waiting for an answer and suddenly I couldn't breathe. I felt like I was suffocating.

"Excuse me for a minute?" I said getting up from my chair and running out of the cafeteria feeling Edward's eyes at my back until I escaped from the doors. I didn't even know where I was headed until I found myself outside, opening the door of my truck and climbing into the seat. My trembling hands gripped the steering wheel and I leaned my head forward against it letting the hot tears flow down my cheeks.

It was only a matter of time before I broke really, considering the events of the past days that turned my world completely upside down even though it was turned completely right again. Who knew the break would come sooner rather than later? I supposed it was the culmination of everything including how much of a mess I made my future with all the stupidity of the previous months. On top of that was Edward treating me as a child incapable of making any decisions for myself _again_, as if I hadn't been competent in making my own choices for years before he came along. At this moment I _did_ feel incapable, incapable _and_ useless.

Edward POV

Even not being able to read Bella's mind, I knew she was annoyed with me as soon as she started to eat her apple and not the pizza I had picked out for her. Didn't she realize that I only wanted her to be healthy again? I supposed she thought I was being controlling and perhaps I was but it was only for her own benefit. She looked even more breakable now than before I left.

"I got my acceptance to UCLA over the break." Jessica announced.

"That's great Jess." Angela told her. "I'm still waiting to hear back from my schools."

"Do you know where you're going Bella?" Jessica asked Bella directly. Maybe I would finally get to know what Bella's college plans were, if she had any. What am I thinking? Of course she would although I still think that Dartmouth would be the best choice for both of us.

Bella started to choke on the apple she had been chewing. Apparently, she didn't expect the question.

I started to gently pat her back, beginning to get alarmed that she was still choking.

"Are you okay Bella?" I asked her concerned.

She nodded and coughed once more. "Excuse me for a minute?" She said getting up from her chair and ran out of the cafeteria. I watched her back as she ran and had no idea what to do. Did I go after her? Maybe she was running off to the bathroom and would be back in a few minutes.

"Was it something I said?" Jessica asked feigning innocence. _Bella's probably embarrassed because she's not going anywhere. _

With the exception of Victoria, I was never tempted to hit a female until now. I turned to Jasper, who looked just as disgusted as I with Jessica. However, he answered my silent question regarding Bella's mood.

_Shame, anger, despair. _Those three words he silently uttered caused my brain to go into overdrive. Why? I wondered. Was she _that_ distressed over college? The matter could be so easily fixed. But of course she wouldn't see it that way. I looked to Alice for any advice she could give me about how to proceed.

_Go to her, Edward. She's crying in her truck _Alice conveyed to me. I didn't need to think twice about it.

"Excuse me." I said getting up to head out the doors to Bella.

_Edward wait._ Alice called out to me in her mind. _What she says to you, you need to listen to her, I mean really listen. It's important. Don't worry, all will be well._

With Alice's words echoing through my head, I ran outside into the rain. I spotted her, huddled over her steering wheel, shoulders moving up and down with what I assumed were sobs, deep heart wrenching sobs. Moving without conscious thought, I made my way to her, opening her truck door and getting in beside her. Her tears didn't stop but she turned to me and I could do nothing but cradle her in my arms, my chin resting gently on top of her head.

"Love, please. Tell me what's wrong. I hate seeing you like this. Tell me what to do to make it better." I pleaded with her.

"No" She shook her head, her voice muffled by my shirt.

"Why not?" She could be so exasperatingly stubborn sometimes.

Her fingers gripped tighter onto my shirt. "I don't want to hurt you." Of course, I thought. How utterly like Bella to be more concerned about my feelings than her own.

"Bella, look at me please." I said tilting her head up so I could look into her tearful eyes. "You're already hurting me by keeping whatever it is that is upsetting you bottled up inside. Tell me what it is. We can fix it together." I promised.

She looked at me and I knew she was trying to judge the sincerity of my words. Nodding, she reached over to the glove compartment, pulled out a box of tissues and blew her nose.

"It's a few things actually." She started.

Obviously Bella was keeping a lot more in than she let on. It disturbed me that she had gotten so accomplished at hiding her emotions while I was away. I could no longer read her as easily as I once did and I knew, thanks to Angela, she learned how to camouflage because of me. "Okay then let's go through them one by one. Jessica asking about college plans is what set you off, correct? Why don't we start off with that?"

She let out a deep breath and I could feel her heart beat pick up in pace. "Okay…" She shook her head again. "No Edward, I can't."

"Bella" I sighed. "I went through 24 hours believing you were…dead" I said forcing the bitter tasting word out of my mouth. "There is no greater pain than that. So please." I asked her once more.

"It's just that I never applied to any colleges. After you…well you know, my grades suffered. I went from a straight 'A' student to getting B's and C's. I didn't think about college because…well because frankly I hadn't planned on living past a few days ago."

She looked up at me to see how I was taking this, trying to gauge my guilt. It was hard to hide but I did it for her. I needed her to tell me these things and she wouldn't if she thought for one moment it was causing me pain.

"It's okay love. We can work on your college applications together. I'm sure it's not too late. I think Dartmouth will allow late entries." In fact I would make sure of it. A large donation would do it.

She pulled back from me then. "Dartmouth, Edward? Be serious. Even if I could get in, which I seriously doubt by the way, I would never be able to pay for it."

Didn't she get it yet that I would do anything, pay any price for her and be glad to do it? Money was of no consequence to me. "I could…"

"No!" she shouted. "I know what you're going to say and don't"

"But Bella…"

"But nothing, Edward. I mean it."

I knew I wouldn't be able to get through to her now. Perhaps I could arrange a scholarship, anonymously of course. "Okay fine but I will help you with your applications, including one to Dartmouth. You never know."

She looked skeptical but finally nodded.

"There's something else that is bothering you?" I asked her remembering that she said there were a few things on her mind.

"Uh, yeah but we don't have to discuss that now."

"I think we should. It's better to get it all out in one shot." Whatever else was on her mind, I didn't want sitting between us. I heard Alice's words reverberate through my head. "_You need to listen to her, I mean really listen."_

She smoothed her hands down my cheek then. "You know I love you, right?" She questioned.

I nodded slowly. "As I love you." I replied wondering where she was headed.

"Yes, well…Oh I don't know how to say this." She worried her bottom lip with her teeth. Even though I wasn't an empath like Jasper, I knew she was anxious.

"Just tell me."

"It's just that you make me so angry sometimes."

That I was not expecting. "How so?"

"Well, it's just that and I know you mean well but I feel like you are trying to control me all the time as if I can't make decisions on my own. You dictate our relationship; decide who I can and can't hang out with and you have even gone as far as picking my food out for me. It's stifling and it makes me feel like less than a person. I don't need another parent. " She laughed mockingly then. "In fact, I've been more of a parent than my own mother and father. The last decision my parents made for me was when my mom signed me up for ballet and we all know how well _that_ turned out. I've been running my life for many years and with the exception of the past few months, I don't think I did too badly."

"I didn't…" I started only to have Bella interrupt me again.

"Just listen, please." Bella placed her finger over my lips and I heard Alice's voice again telling me to listen. "_If_…and I mean _if_ I decide to marry you, I need to know that you will treat me as an equal, a true life partner. You will discuss things with me. You won't autonomously make decisions regarding me or us. I don't want a 19th century marriage. Like I said, I know you mean well and only seek to protect me but Edward, it makes me feel like a useless, incapable child when you do that and it hurts me that you don't think I am smart enough or competent enough or even trust me enough to do things or decide things on my own."

I hung my head in shameful remorse and wrapped my arms more tightly around her holding her close. I had no idea I was making her feel like this. All I wanted to do was protect her and never saw that I wasn't protecting but controlling her. I hadn't been treating her as my equal and for that I was ashamed.

"I'm so sorry Bella" I whispered. "Of course I think you are intelligent and capable. It's just that you are so necessary to me in ways I don't think you can comprehend that all my survival instincts kick in at the thought of any harm coming to you. I'm glad you told me how you feel."

"So you're not mad at me then?"

"Mad at you? For telling me how you feel? Never think that, love. I am madder at myself for not seeing it and what it has done to you and done to us. It won't be easy for me to change but I will promise to try and amend my ways. Though, I am _always_ going to be protective of you. I can't help that."

"I know you can't" She said snuggling closer.

"You may have to remind me from time to time." It wasn't going to be easy, I knew. Bella's safety and well being was my top if not my only priorities. But she was right. I needed to trust her if I wanted her to consent to be my wife. "And in turn I want you to promise me something." I said.

"What is it?" She asked and I could hear trepidation in her tone.

"If there is something, _anything bothering you_…I don't care if it's a headache, I need you to tell me. I don't care how painful you think it is for me to hear, your silence hurts me more."

"I guess that is how _I _try to protect _you_." She said. "It's the only way I know I can. But I will try to be more forthcoming as well."

We would heal…together. I felt more confident now that we had this conversation that she would soon decide to be my bride and we would have all of eternity together. If I was honest with myself, I knew I was too selfish to ever let her go. The part of me that I tried to keep hidden, the part of me that secretly wanted her to be of my kind was getting harder and harder to deny. It no longer was only what she wanted but what we both wanted.

Unable to stop the descent of my lips onto hers, I kissed her feeling her mouth mold to mine. I gently caressed my tongue along her bottom lip and felt her tremble with passion in my arms. It was an effort to restrain myself from laying her down on the seat of the truck and exploring her fully as I knew she wanted me to do. We were in a truck for God's sake, in the school parking lot. No! I reluctantly reigned myself in and gave her one last kiss before pulling away. I would not, _we_ would not do this until she was my wife. Besides I could so very easily kill her if I lost control.

"Forgive me, love." I whispered to her stroking her hair. Her eyes still glazed with passion.

"For what?" Starting or stopping?" She said grinning mischievously.

Bella POV


	18. Extracurricular Activities

Bella POV

Several weeks passed by without too much incident and before long it felt as if the Cullens never left…to the rest of the student body anyway. For me, I didn't know if that hole that had opened when they first left would ever fully close. Edward did his best to reassure me but I had to admit to myself that no matter what words he spoke, there was a part of me still waiting for the proverbial axe to fall…waiting for him to tell me that coming back was a mistake after all. I would never voice my insecurities to him, however. He had been through more than enough recently and I didn't want to add to his pain. I couldn't help but wonder, though, if my nightmares had somehow revealed themselves to him while talking in my sleep and he knew anyway despite my efforts to hide them from him. If he knew he never said a word.

I had placated myself with the fact that he did want to marry me and truth be told the idea of marriage to Edward grew more intriguing by the day. In fact, I really couldn't think of a reason _not_ to commit to him fully in that capacity. Edward was the only man I ever wanted… would ever and could ever want. I knew that as sure as I knew the sun would rise and set each day. The rationale of not wanting to get married so young was becoming less and less of an obstacle to my finally saying "yes" to his proposal.

I hadn't heard from Jacob and I didn't know whether to be saddened, grateful or worried. I knew he could not do anything in an official "wolf pack" capacity without any provocation. The treaty was still intact. But I knew Jacob and he tended to be impulsive and _that_ was what had me slightly on edge. _Would_ he act on his own and break the treaty because of me? I hoped not but judging from his reactions when I last saw him, I couldn't be sure.

Edward and I spent much of our time after school was spent on filling out college applications or should I say I was filling out applications, Edward was assisting me. The first one he had me fill out was for Dartmouth. I gave up arguing with him on that one. If he didn't believe I wouldn't get in, I would just show him the rejection letter once I received one. Thankfully, most of the essay questions were the same so I could recycle those.

Charlie only mentioned once that he thought I was spending too much time with Edward but once I said we were filling out college applications, he really didn't have much of an opposition to that. I knew he was only looking out for my best interests though. He felt that should Edward ever leave again, I would forever remain broken. I didn't argue with him because it was the truth.

One typically dreary Forks afternoon, Edward and I were at his house when he placed a whole new set of applications in front of me. I couldn't suppress the groan that escaped my lips.

"I thought we were done with these." I moaned wanting nothing more than to pick the stack up and launch it across the room. "I don't think I can feel my wrist _or_ fingers anymore."

"These are scholarship applications, love. Since you insist on paying your own way, I thought it would be prudent to fill these out."

"Ugh" I said burying my face in my hands.

He grinned. "Well, if you agreed to marry me what is mine would automatically become yours and this" he said gesturing to the pile of papers on the table "Wouldn't have to hurt your lovely hands filling these out." This was the first time he had brought up the marriage issue since he had first asked. I knew he wasn't expecting an answer so I didn't give him one even though my mind was almost completely made up.

"Even so…I would still want to pay my own way no matter what so it's a moot point." I grumbled reaching for the first set of papers on the stack.

Edward became serious then. "Bella, why can't you let me do this one thing for you?"

I sighed. I could swear we had this conversation already. "Because this isn't something small, it's _huge_. Because you have given me so much already and I can't give you anything in return. It just throws everything completely out of balance."

He rolled his eyes then and reached for me cupping my face in his hands so he could look directly into my eyes. "You have given me more than you know, more than I deserve. It is _me_ that has been thrown out of balance with the gifts you have bestowed upon me…your _forgiveness_." He kissed my cheek. "Your _love_." He kissed my other cheek. "_You_." He finally said placing a tender kiss on my lips. He pulled back and rested his cool forehead on mine. "I don't think you realize how inconsequential the amount of money is to me. I have…"

"No, don't say it. I don't want to know." I interrupted him. I could only imagine the amount of money that was available to him which made me feel even more insignificant.

He seemed like he was in an internal debate with himself. He briefly closed his eyes. "Okay then. Let's get to work."

I knew then I had won the battle but the outcome of the war was yet to be determined. I was proud of him though. He reigned in and didn't force the issue and I knew he made the effort as part of his promise to me to accept that I could make my own decisions.

Edward grabbed a bunch of papers from the pile. "I'll help you with these. " he said. "I think I can imitate your chicken scratch as much as it pains me to do so."

"We can't all have perfect handwriting like you." I told him giving him a playful punch on the arm which I knew he barely even felt.

"Years of practice my love." He said starting to write.

Emmett and Rosalie chose that moment to come in.

"What's this?" Emmett boomed a large smirk on his face . "For a recently reunited couple I'm sure there are better things besides homework that you can be doing. If you know what I mean." He said ruffling Edward's hair.

"Emmett" Edward warned in a growl.

"Oh Come on now Eddie. You know I'm right. I bet Bell wouldn't disagree." He winked at me.

"Aren't you supposed to be somewhere?" I asked him.

"Nope" he replied with a huge grin and sat down with us.

"C'mon Emmett" Rosalie said pulling him up. "Let's leave them to their school work while we enjoy some extracurricular activities." She said and they walked upstairs together, Emmett's tongue practically hanging out of his mouth.

"Could they be any more obvious?" I said.

"Just be grateful you couldn't hear what they were thinking."

I could just imagine. But Emmett had a point. What _were_ we doing wasting our time together with this? We needed a well deserved break. I moved to sit on his lap facing him and wrapped my arms around him.

"Speaking of extracurricular activities." I said. "Why don't we explore some on our own?"

"You are the epitome of temptation, love." He said threading his fingers in my hair and pulling me closer for a deep kiss…one that I felt to my very toes. He pulled back ever so slightly. "How could I ever have conceived that I could live without this…without _you_?"

"Hmm, I don't know. A momentary lapse of reason."

He chuckled. "I must have been insane." His mouth covered mine again, his hands moving from my hair down my back hitching my hips even closer to his. Liquid heat infused my entire body and I felt like I was melting. I was waiting for him to pull away as things were getting intense but his lips and hands showed no sign of stopping their exquisite assault. Moaning deep in my throat, I gripped his hair trying to pull him closer to me, if that was even possible at this point.

"Bella." He moaned letting me come up for air. The look in his eyes was dark with desire as he stared at me intently. In one fell swoop he swiped all the papers from the table and lifted me onto it, his body covering mine, his lips descending on mine once again. I was momentarily startled when his lips moved from trailing down my face to gently caress the sensitive area between my neck and collar bone. Clearly Edward was moving past all of his carefully laid boundaries and I wondered what had changed. What had caused him to suddenly stop being so cautious?

"Who are you and what have you done with my Edward?" I whispered as he was swirling his tongue in the most delicious pattern on my neck.

He pulled back suddenly as if finally realizing what he was doing, a shocked expression etched on his beautiful face. He looked around registering the fact that we were lying prone on the dining room table with a mess of papers surrounding us. "Oh, God. I am so sorry Bella."

I partially sat up resting my elbows on the table, his body still hovering over mine. Caressing his cheek with one hand, I stilled him. "It's fine. Believe me. I'm not complaining. I was just wondering when you decided not to be so…uh…careful." I wanted to kick myself for asking but I had to know.

He was still leaning over me, his brows creased in confusion. "I don't know." He said finally. "it's just that since I came back after so long without you…after finding you alive… after thinking you were dead, I…I don't know…I just have this insatiable need to be with you, to physically touch you. It's overwhelming. I didn't hurt you, did I?"

I shook my head. "No. I know you could never hurt me."

"But I so easily could have. The need was just _that_ strong. That would have been…unforgivable…and to nearly take you on a table no less" He looked thoroughly disgusted with himself.

"Edward please stop. Don't beat yourself up over this. I enjoyed it. I had hoped you did too."

"More than you know, my sweet Bella. More than you know."

He kissed me once more but this kiss was chaste in comparison to the ones before.

That's how Alice found us moments later.

"Really, Edward? On Esme's table?" We stopped, instantly separating to see Alice standing there with her hands on her hips and an admonishing look on her face. I felt the heat rise to my cheeks and Edward looked wholly contrite.

"Hi Alice." I said with a grin.

Alice POV

I was in a good mood, no, correct that, a _great_ mood. The vision was clear and I knew that Bella would indeed say yes to Edward's proposal this coming weekend…well 98% sure. And I had plans, big plans. So when I entered the house after coming back from shopping, it came as quite a shock when I saw Edward practically lying on top of Bella on the dining room table of all places. What was he thinking? Did his dormant teenage hormones suddenly decide to kick in? I knew instantly he would regret if anything progressed further than it had. He was old fashioned…he wanted to wait for a wedding night, no matter what his body was telling him to do. Ugh, when did I turn into a _mom_?

"Really, Edward? On Esme's table?" I glared at them with my hands on my hips. They looked at me like two deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car and separated instantly. I refrained from laughing and put on my best stern parental face. This was fun.

"Hi Alice." Bella said grinning at me.

"Don't you 'Hi Alice' me." I said indignantly. "Thank goodness it was me that found you _in flagrante ____**delicto **__**and not, God forbid, Emmett.**______**You're just lucky we don't **____**eat**__** on that table." **____**No, No, No, Edward. You're supposed to wait. **__**I mentally admonished him. At least he had the decency to look ashamed. Bella, on the other hand looked like the cat that ate the proverbial canary. I wanted to shout 'Good for you' to her for getting Edward to be less Victorian but I held back. Wedding night, wedding night. I kept repeating to myself. Edward must have been listening in because he looked at me questioningly. **_

___**Later **_

_**He nodded and helped Bella off of the dining room table. **_

_"**Sorry Alice." Bella said now feeling somewhat abashed as she began picking up papers from the floor.**_

_**I grinned to let her know all was forgiven. "Oh don't apologize. I just never knew homework could inspire such…passion."**_

_"**Yes..err…well." Bella fumbled, another blush rising to her cheeks. **_

_"**Been shopping Alice?' Edward said to get away from the awkward topic as he noticed the bags on the floor next to me.**_

_"**As a matter of fact…yes I have." I quickly thought about some Italian food recipes. No need to tell him that I was actually shopping for Bella.**_

_"**Anything interesting?" Judging by the look on his face, he wasn't fooled. What was in the bags was all part of my "revenge", so to speak. They just didn't know that yet. I would have to work extra hard at controlling my thoughts around Edward. **_

_"**I don't shop and tell." I told him smugly. He eyed me suspiciously. "Why don't you take Bella home so she can cook dinner for Charlie? Otherwise he is just going to eat another Salisbury steak frozen dinner. Too much sodium in those." I said. **____**When you come back, we'll talk Edward.**_


	19. Edward's Epiphany

Edward POV

When I arrived back at the house after taking Bella home, Alice, the little pixie was skipping around the house saying the word "Yes" repeatedly in every tone, pitch and cadence imaginable.

"What has gotten into you?" I asked her flagrantly curious.

She stopped and grinned widely at me. "I'm just trying to get you used to hearing the word."

It didn't take me all that long to figure out what she was referring to since it was the upper most thing in my mind of late. "You mean…Has Bella made a decision? Are you absolutely certain?" I tried to quell the overwhelming joy I was starting to feel until Alice gave me a definitive answer.

"As certain as I can be barring any complications within the next few days. You'll ask her this weekend."

I didn't like the bit about complications especially knowing mine and Bella's track record but I was hopeful, more than I had been in a long time.

"A warning Edward, she is going to want a wedding night, a human wedding night…well half human anyway. Though judging by what was happening on the dining room table, I think you want one too."_ Maybe you should ask Carlisle for some guidance._

"Edward was getting busy with Bella on the dining room table?" Emmett said coming down the stairs with Rosalie in tow. Great. This was all I needed. "Man I would have paid to see that."

"You were otherwise occupied." Rosalie purred.

"Yeah but Rosie, we can do that _any_time. Edward getting jiggy with Bella on Esme's antique table…I never thought I'd see the day. It's about time man. I was beginning to think you were dead." He said laughing at his own joke.

"Why don't you crawl back in the hole you came out of?" I hissed at him.

_Aww, c'mon Eddie you know I can't let this one go. _"Where's Bella. She didn't leave you high and dry did she?" He said looking around for Bella.

"He took her home, Emmett." Alice told him.

"Now I have to wait to tease her…damn." He grumbled looking like a little boy that had his favorite toy taken away.

"Uh, Emmett. I don't think that would be wise." Rose warned him. She must have noticed the murderous expression on my face. If Emmet wanted to tease me, that was fine…annoying but fine. However, I drew the line where Bella was concerned.

Unable to deal with anymore riddling from my siblings, I escaped to the comforts of my room. It was only here that I could be alone with the privacy of my own thoughts without the interference of others getting jumbled into the mix.

If I could count on Alice's visions and I knew that mostly I could, Bella would be soon making me the happiest creature on earth. I took the ring I had planned on giving her out of the confines of my drawer and pictured how it would look in her finger. It would be perfect. I could imagine no greater joy than to hear her say the word that she would be mine forever…to see the ring adorning her delicate finger. But I was getting ahead of myself. I had yet to ask the question and there was still so much left unresolved.

Truth be told, I _did_ worry that Bella wanted a "human" wedding night, as Alice had put it. Everything in me wanted to share that final bond with her…to truly make her mine in every sense of the word but at the same token my entire being shied away from anything that would cause her harm. Perhaps Alice _was _right. I needed to speak with Carlisle.

Then there was the matter of Bella's health…mentally and physically. She appeared to be getting better on all counts…her face didn't look as gaunt as it did when I initially returned but every once in a while when she didn't think I was looking, I caught an expression in her eyes that matched the exact expression she wore in Alice's vision when she dived off the cliff. Then there were the nightmares night after night that I was a virtually helpless witness to; her only balm upon wakening shaken and sweating was my cool touch and soft spoken promises. In her dreams was the only time she let go of her carefully controlled outward veneer and I got to see only a glimpse of the inner torment that still attacked her subconscious mind. I hadn't said anything to Bella yet but I was worried.

A knock on my door brought me out of my thoughts. Carlisle opened the door.

"Alice said you might want to speak with me?" He questioned.

"Yes. Come in."

He entered and closed the door behind him almost giving a false illusion of privacy, as if there was such a thing in a house full of vampires with impeccable hearing.

_He looks so happy lately. I had despaired I would never see him smile again. Thank you Bella. _I smiled at Carlisle's thoughts. After a century of despondency and a brief period of self imposed exile I had finally come to my senses and saw what everyone knew all along. Bella was my salvation…my saving grace. She and she alone had the power to make me happy…to bring color into my dark and gray existence. Without her there was nothing. My family adored her, as did I.

"What is troubling you? I hear Bella will say yes. Am I not correct?" He finally asked me, seeing that I was not forthcoming in my questions.

"Alice believes that is so." I confirmed.

"I don't understand." _You should be ecstatic._

"I am, Carlisle. But…" Usually so articulate I found myself at a complete loss of words. So much so that it seemed to all come spilling out of my mouth at once in a rush. "It's odd but since I came back and maybe even before then I have felt this overwhelming _need_ to be with Bella…in _every_ sense of the word. It quite literally causes me physical pain…like I almost can't breathe and feel an unbearable tightness in my chest. Frankly Bella and I…well mostly me…have been testing the limits of the physical boundaries I had so carefully placed. Now Alice tells me that Bella will most likely want to have a true wedding night and I am terrified that I will hurt her. And I worry about her Carlisle. I worry Bella is not healed emotionally from when I had left. I am afraid for her because sometimes, mostly in dreams, it seems that she is still in that place from a month ago when she wanted to end her life."

Carlisle out up a hand to halt me. "Whoa Edward. I can see now why you are so upset but surprisingly everything you mentioned is all linked."

"How so?" The connection escaped me.

_Hmm, how to explain? _"Okay. Let's tackle this one at a time and I will show you how the puzzle pieces fit together. Are you afraid that Bella would try to harm herself again?"

I thought about that for a moment. I had to be honest with myself. "I'm not much of a psychologist but I do know that when someone tries to hurt themselves they will usually try again."

"Let me ask you this then…do you think _you _are suicidal?"

I nearly felt affronted that he would ask such a thing of me. My answer was quick. "No, of course not."

"And yet you were about to fly off to Italy to ask the Volturi to kill you."

I ran my fingers through my hair. "That's different. I thought Bella was dead…my whole reason for existing gone. What else could I do?"

"Did you perhaps think that by leaving Bella the way you did, with no hope of you ever coming back that it would have been like _you_ were dead to _her_? That you took the reason for her existence away from her?" _As a human the after effects will linger for a time but as long as you keep your promise and stay, I don't see Bella taking such a desperate act again._

I hadn't thought about that, not really. "So what are you telling me Carlisle?"

_This is where the pieces fit together, my son. _He put a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Bella is your true life's mate and everything in you, everything that you are craves to be with her, to make her truly yours. That's how it is with vampires. Kind of like a much stronger version of a wolf's imprint. I can barely stand to be away from Esme for any extended period of time and I am sure if you were to ask your siblings they would tell you the same. Even though Bella is not one of us _yet_ it seems she was always destined to be. Vampires don't usually have humans as a life's mate and the bond between you and Bella is one of the strongest I have ever seen, even between two of our kind. It is truly a gift that you have been bestowed and I am happy that you are finally embracing it and cherishing it."

"And the wedding night?" I asked my voice coming out hoarse almost strangled.

"That's the easiest Edward. You have tasted her blood and yet she still lives. _That_ is testament alone to your strength and to the strength of your love. The physical act of love is a wondrous, beautiful thing but the physical act of love between life mates is as necessary as a human's need for air. I am actually quite surprised that you have been able to wait this long although from what Alice tells me it's becoming more difficult. I _do_ understand why you want to wait until your wedding however. You are truly a man of your time. But don't let fear keep you from your happiness. You have tried that path once before and it did not work out too well."

No, no it didn't.

_If you want to discuss this further down the road, my door is always open to you._

"Carlisle, thank you." I told him sincerely.

He nodded. "Will you be asking Bella this weekend?"

"That is the plan. In our meadow." I was both nervous and excited.

_How wonderful! _"Have Esme pack a picnic basket. I understand women think picnics are quite romantic." _Maybe some champagne. I won't tell Charlie if you won't._

"Somehow, I think Esme will opt for sparkling cider."

Carlisle made a face. "Hmm, I think you're right." _I see I have given you much to think about yet again. I'll leave you alone with your thoughts._

It was as Carlisle had said. All the pieces did fit together. Could it really be so simple and I have been agonizing over this for naught? Bella would be the first to tell me so, I smiled. Bella, I thought. Without even needing to check the clock, I knew that it was time to go to her.

I climbed in her window already knowing she would be waiting for me. There she sat on her bed, Indian style, reading. Judging from the books dilapidated state, I could tell it was a book she had read many times before.

"Which book is it this time?" I asked her.

Startled, she jumped then smiled. "You scared me."

Sitting down beside her, I breathed in her essence and softly kissed her lips. Forcing myself to pull away, I turned my attention to the book in her hands. "Wuthering Heights? How many times have you read this one?"

"A few." She shrugged putting the book aside and turned to me.

I stroked her cheek with my finger and she leaned into the touch. It always amazed and awed me that she was not repelled by my cold skin. "Mmm, I was thinking that we have had enough of college applications. Perhaps we could go to our meadow this Saturday. We have not been there in quite some time. "

Her eyes lit up at this prospect. "I would love that."

"Good. I'll even bring a picnic along." I smiled at her.

"Yes, we mustn't forget to feed the human." But there was no censure in her words.

I laughed and nuzzled her neck.

Bella made a mewling sound deep in the back of her throat and threaded her fingers in my hair. My body tightened in pleasure. "You seem unusually happy this evening." My Bella was always so perceptive.

"That's because I am happy. _You_ make me happy." I told her and God willing we would be happy for all eternity.

"I'm just so used to brooding Edward. What happened?" Her breathe hitched suddenly as I brought my lips to hers once again and kissed her tenderly. I pulled back and looked deep into her chocolate brown eyes.

"Let's just say I had an epiphany of sorts."

"Care to share?"

"Hmm, maybe later." I said dragging her into my lap and embracing her letting her know that talking was hot high on my list of priorities at the moment.


	20. Return to the Meadow The Proposal

By the way …I love reviews..they provide great writing fuel.

Bella POV

I had to admit that I was bemused by Edward's behavior of late. Ever since his "epiphany", which I was still in the dark about, it seemed that the veritable gloom and doom had disappeared from his demeanor and he was genuinely happy.

Today we were going to our meadow. I was glad the sun decided to cooperate and would shine for us this day.

My breath involuntarily hitched as I saw it. Gone was the dead brown growth. Instead purple, white, yellow and blue wildflowers adorned the overgrown green grass like an intricately woven tapestry. It was even more beautiful then I remembered, more beautiful than the memories in my dreams had allowed.

Edward must have noticed my sudden hesitance and turned to me, concerned.

"What is it? What's wrong?" He looked momentarily pained as he put down the picnic basket and took both my hands in his.

I almost gave him my typical response that everything was fine but he would recognize it for the lie that it was. I did give him my promise that I would be honest with him about my feelings, no matter how hard they were for him to hear at times.

"I came here once…after you left. I actually found it by myself." Edward winced at this confession. I was actually quite proud at the time that after searching for so long I had actually managed to locate it. "Everything was dead and barren. Almost as if when you left you took our special place with you. Then, of course, there was Laurent…" My voice trailed off as I shuddered with the memory of Laurent getting way too close before the wolves came.

Edward's grip tightened on mine and his topaz gaze locked on mine. "Tell me…everything." He said speaking through clenched teeth.

"I thought Alice already told you." I told him not really wanting to get into this conversation here and now.

"I want to hear it first-hand. From you."

"Do we have to do this now? It's so beautiful today and I don't want to ruin it with talk of Laurent or any other unpleasant things."

He thought for a moment then shook his head. "No." He said smiling as he kissed my forehead. "I'm sorry your last memory of this place was a horrible one. We'll make new and happier ones….come." He said taking my hand and pulled me towards the center and spread out a large blanket on the ground.

I lay on Edward's chest staring up at the clouds that moved and swayed across the late morning sky. His fingers wove through my hair as his other hand stroked lightly down my arm.

"That one looks like a dog." I said pointing up at a particular cloud formation.

"No it doesn't." He argued. "It looks like a dinosaur."

"A dog." I argued back.

"Since I have better eyesight...I say it's a dinosaur." We both laughed. It had been so long since we had done anything so care free and dare I say innocent.

"I used to do this as a kid." I told him automatically blushing at my inadvertent revelation.

"What?" He asked pulling a flower from the ground and placing it behind my ear letting his fingers trail down my jaw line.

"Lie on the grass and stare at the clouds, guessing their shapes. It was a game Renee and I used to play together. We would even spin around to make ourselves dizzy then lie down on our lawn and watch the sky spin." I looked at him then knowing now that this was the moment. My decision was clear.

"Mmm, I would have loved to watch you as a little girl. What does that one look like?" He said rolling over on his side and leaning on his elbow facing me as he pointed to a large fluffy white cloud.

"That's easy." I whispered huskily. "It's a cake." I turned to look at him then staring at him intently. "A big, tasty _wedding _cake."

I saw Edward's eyes widen and his own breath caught then. He looked at me with a silent question in his eyes and just as silently I answered, moving my head in an almost imperceptible nod. But it was enough for him to get him scrambling to his feet, his whole face alight with joy.

Before I knew it he had pulled me to my feet, one hand in mine and the other clutching a small square shaped velvet box. His eye locked on mine he slowly opened the box and in it was the most beautiful piece of jewelry I had ever seen. The ring was a long oval shaped with small gemstones elaborately laid into the ring.

"Oh Edward. It's beautiful." I whispered briefly tracing it with the tip of my finger.

He seemed inordinately pleased. "It was my Mother's. Now it's yours." He proceeded to kneel down on one knee in the traditional pose. I could feel the pricks of tears sting my eyes, threatening to overflow and a heated blush rose to my cheeks. He never took his eyes off my face. "Isabella Swan, I promise to love you every single day of forever. Would you do me the great honor of becoming my wife?"

The tears that had been in my eyes now flowed silently down my cheeks. "Yes." I told him. The answer was simple, confident, as if I was waiting for this moment my whole life. Gone were the doubts and the worries. I was going to marry Edward. I knew it as sure as I knew my own name.

"There it shall stay for the rest of eternity."He said as he placed the ring on the third finger of my left hand and kissed it reverently. It fit perfectly, just like us.

Edward POV

I picked her up and swung her around in my arms emitting a carefree laugh. She had said "Yes" and I knew that there never was, nor would there ever be anyone that was happier than I was. This moment would only pale in comparison to the day Bella would say "I do".

As I held my beautiful Bella in my arms I couldn't help but think I was wholly undeserving of this, of _her_. No! I would not let the brooding creature within me impede on this perfection. Yes, I was selfish, yes, I wasn't worthy of her but as I inhaled Bella's sweet fragrance, for once I didn't care. I _would_ allow myself this happiness. She was mine and I was hers. No matter what came before or what would come after, our destinies were linked together, irrevocably.

"If I would've known you would be this happy with my answer I would have said 'yes' weeks ago." Bella's voice said interrupting my thoughts.

I set her down and cupped her face in my hands. "I wanted you to be sure. And Alice chastised me about it. Apparently I hadn't asked properly the first time. I am glad you waited to give me an answer."

"Truly?" There was uncertainty in her eyes.

"It makes this moment all the sweeter." I chuckled softly as I heard her stomach emit a low grumble. "Lunchtime for the human?"

Bella scowled. "Trust my stomach to intrude."

"Come.' I said taking her hand leading her back towards the blanket. "Esme will be disappointed if you didn't eat at least _some_ of the lunch she made."

"You really know how to play the guilt card." She sighed sitting down cross legged. "So what's in the basket?"

Knowing Esme, she probably made quite a spread and I wasn't disappointed. Pulling out the containers, I called out their contents. "Let's see…fried chicken, salad, corn on the cob, chocolate mousse, cheese, crackers…"

"Whoa. I hope she doesn't expect me to eat all that. Maybe I'll bring some home to Charlie. I'm sure he'd love it."

There was something else in the basket…a bottle. At first I thought it was the sparkling cider that Carlisle and I were talking about. Only it wasn't. It was a bottle of Krug Clos Du Mesnil 1995, one of the finest, if not _the_ finest, champagnes in the world. There was a note attached.

_Congratulations! Champagne should accompany all human celebrations…I replaced the sparkling cider, obviously. Don't tell Esme. You're Welcome, by the way._

_Love Alice._

Alice…I should have known.

"What's that?" Bella asked looking at the bottle I had in my hand.

"Champagne." I told her holding up the bottle. "A gift from Alice."

Jacob POV

I had been sitting around the house just moping or tinkering with the old shit heap I was trying to turn into a car for the past few weeks…ever since Bella took that bloodsucker back into her life. But my hands were tied, bound by Sam and the stupid treaty that I could not break. I had even ran off to Seattle in a futile effort to imprint on some girl, any girl but I came home realizing what everyone else knew all along. It just doesn't work that way. It would have made my life so much easier if I could have found that one girl, the one that would make me forget why Bella had become so important to me. For some reason, the man upstairs likes to watch me suffer. I must provide him with some great entertainment. It sounded like one sick soap opera. Werewolf loves human girl who loves a vampire. Throw in a psychic, a doctor, a cop and a shaman and yeah, you pretty much had the makings of a ratings winner.

So many times I wanted to go to her but stopped myself. Sam stopped me. _She_ was under _their_ protection now, I was informed. But how could she be? Blood flowed warm within her veins. Her heart still beat even if its beats were only for him.

The rest of the pack wished I would just get over it already but they didn't understand. Hell, I didn't even understand. There was only one thing I knew with absolute certainty…I needed to make Bella mine. She was too good for the leech that broke her heart.

Charlie had come over today to see my dad. They sat in the living room drinking beers and watching a baseball game. Glutton for punishment that I am I couldn't help but eavesdrop on them from my room. Most of what I heard consisted of shouts and boos. Nothing useful. I guess Charlie refrained from speaking about Bella to my dad knowing that it might upset him or me. It wasn't until the post game analysis that Billy brought up the topic. I strained listen closely, putting down the piece of wood I was carving.

"How's Bella doing these days? I haven't seen her in awhile." Billy asked Charlie.

"She's doing good. Better than she has been."

"She's with the Cullen boy again." It wasn't a question.

I heard Charlie make a hard swallow. "Yeah. "

"You don't approve." Again, not a question.

"I'll tell ya, he's got her filling out her college applications and her school work has improved" He laughed humorlessly "But he hurt her so badly. I just wish it was your boy Bella was with." At least Charlie was on my side. "And I thought at least for a little while that was where it was headed but I was just fooling myself. Since he came back it's like the light that went out of her eyes the day he left came back again. He seems to really love her. I can say that much for him. The way he looks at her, it's like she is his whole world."

_She's mine too, Charlie, she's mine too. _

"And from what I can tell, the Cullens are good people."

To that statement, Billy grunted. My father was never one for many words when a simple sound would do.

"You don't like them much, do you?" Charlie asked him.

"I am not a big fan of _their_ kind." Billy replied. I knew what he was referring to but Charlie did not. I also knew Billy wouldn't say anything to threaten their precious treaty, the treaty that I had come to hate.

"What kind? You mean rich? They're not that bad. At least they don't flaunt it like some would."

"Yes, you would see it that way." Billy's reply was grim.

"I don't know. I feel like I'm going to lose her Billy…and soon too. She has always been a constant little thing and I can see where this relationship is headed or it may already be there for all I know."

Charlie was very perceptive, I thought balling my hands into fists at the mere thought that Bella would become one of them even if Charlie was misguided to think that he would be losing Bella to something as ordinary as marriage. It turned my stomach more than watching the leech kiss her. I jumped out of the window in my room unable to listen anymore.


	21. Never Bet Against Alice Part 1

A/N: This was originally going to be a one shot in a posting in and of itself but I decided to incorporate it into this story. Believe me it was quite difficult to come up with a situation where Bella would actually bet against Alice on but I think I nailed it. Edward POV in part 2.

Bella POV

I blame it on the champagne. That's definitely the only thing that could have made me delusional enough to bet against Alice. I lost…obviously. Wasn't it me that said "never bet against Alice"? So, here I sat on my bed waiting for the mischievous little pixie to arrive so I could "pay up".

It had all started out innocently enough. Edward and I went back to his house after our time in the meadow to bring the good news of our engagement to his family. Not that we needed to. Alice had already informed them. We were met by knowing grins as soon as we walked in the door.

_Flashback_

Emmett picked me up in a big bear hug and swung me around much like Edward had when I first told him my answer to his proposal. When he set me down, I swayed slightly feeling dizzy. Edward placed his hand on my shoulder to steady me before I fell down in an ungraceful heap on the floor.

"Careful Emmett. She's still breakable." Edward told him but there was no anger in his words.

"She's usually not this klutzy." Then Emmett came closer to me and took a whiff of me. "Bella, are you drunk?"

I look at him horrified. "What? Me? No." I responded. I only had 2 glasses of the delicious champagne. Surely that didn't qualify me as drunk.

Esme looked confused until she looked at Alice, who guiltily looked away but there was a slight smirk on her face.

"Alice. Bella is underage. What were you thinking?" Esme censured.

"I was thinking that she is _always _going to be underage so she might as well try some of the good stuff before it's too late."

But Esme couldn't stay mad for long. She was the next one to offer her felicitations. One by one each member of my new family congratulated us, even Rosalie although she wasn't quite as exuberant as everyone else.

"Bella" Alice said coming over to me with a pleading look in her eyes. "Best friend, sister of mine…"

"Maybe she has her own ideas of what she wants to so with her wedding Alice." Edward interrupted and I guessed he was reading her thoughts.

"Shush Edward. This is between us girls." She nearly growled back at him. "Now where was I? Oh... .can I please, please, please plan your wedding? I won't go overboard. I promise."

"Alice your definition of overboard and mine may vary quite a bit." I told her but I knew I would let her do it anyway. What did I know of wedding planning? I was only interested in the final result. Besides, I knew how much it would mean to Alice.

"Can we meet somewhere in between then?" She pleaded some more.

I rolled my eyes at her. "Okay but I draw the line at exotic animals, unidentifiable French food and want to give final approval for everything."

Alice jumped up and down excitedly, clapping her hands. "Thank you, thank you" She gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Bella, are you _sure_ you want to give Alice free reign?" Jasper asked. He knew his wife after all.

"I only want to marry Edward." I told him simply. "The rest is just window dressing." It was the truth and Jasper saw it as such judging by the serene smile on his face.

"Maybe your mom wants to help with the planning." Esme told me. "Mothers usually like to do that sort of thing."

Renee'! Oh my God. In all the excitement I hadn't once thought of how my parents would react. There was no way I could not tell them and it had to be soon. After all it took a lot of time to plan a wedding and we wanted to do it sometime in August. Crap, crap, crap.

"Bella. Love, what's wrong?" Edward asked concerned sensing my inner distress.

"My parents. What am I going to tell them? They'll freak out. I know it."

"Relax Bella. You will tell them tonight and it will be fine." Alice tried to reassure me but it wasn't working.

My breaths were coming faster and faster and suddenly I felt arms around me. It was Edward. "Breathe Bella" He said calmly and I felt Jasper's tranquil waves envelop me.

"Bella, I promise. Charlie won't react…much and your mom well she kind of has known all along so it would be no great surprise to her."

"You don't know Charlie and Renee…god, she's been telling me what a mistake she made getting married so young my whole life. There is no way they are going to take it well."

Alice suddenly got this look in her eye that I couldn't really describe. It looked very suspicious. "Care to make a bet?" She said.

"No Alice" Edward interrupted her. "Bella don't listen to her." He told me.

I usually wouldn't even conceive of betting against Alice but in this instance I knew I was right.

"Definitely." I told her.

"Okay then. When _I_ win, I get to dress you up the way I want on Monday for school. No compromises."

"Fine and when _I_ win, you can only play your Bella Barbie games with me when it comes to the wedding dress."

"Fine." She looked absolutely pleased with herself. "Deal?" She held out her hand.

"Deal." I said firmly and shook the hand she offered.

_End Flashback_

I should have known at the time. She looked so confident and everyone else save Edward, laughed. He told me later that she had been blocking him the whole time so he couldn't see or hear what was going in her head or else he would have tried harder to stop me. It wouldn't have worked though, I was being stubborn and I knew Charlie and Renee much better than she did. They would not take this lightly. So imagine my surprise when Edward and I sat Charlie down in the living room that evening to tell him, he barely batted an eye.

_Flashback_

"Are you pregnant Bells?" Charlie had asked, his whole demeanor stiff.

"No Dad, it's not like that." I told him.

"Charlie, I realize that I should have asked your permission first but I did propose and she accepted. I love her Charlie, more than you can imagine. We'll both be going to the same college next year…I won't be separated from her again. I am essentially old fashioned." He gave a crooked smile. "And I want her to officially be my wife before we go. We are asking for your blessing."

Charlie shifted in his seat, looking uncomfortable but as far as I could tell he wasn't going to blow. However looks could be deceiving. This could be the calm before the storm.

"Can't say I didn't see this coming sooner or later." He said. "Just wish it were later, is all." He mumbled under his breath. He looked at me square in the eye then. "Are you sure about this Bella, about him?" I knew Charlie was asking mostly because of what I went through when Edward left. I knew Edward thought this too judging by his involuntary wince.

"Absolutely sure." I told him confidently. Charlie looked more closely at me trying to ascertain if I were telling the truth or not. Satisfied, that I was, he nodded.

"I have some money saved up…it's not much but…"

"That's not necessary Charlie."

"Dad, you don't have to." Edward and I spoke at the same time.

This seemed to anger Charlie more than anything else that we said. I chalked it up to male pride.

Charlie shook his head, disagreeing. "Now, Bella. You are my only child and I know I haven't been there much for you. Make your old man happy. Please let me contribute something."

I looked at Edward. He nodded silently his consent. This wasn't for me, this was for Charlie. "Okay Dad. If it will make you happy."

Charlie laughed then, deep, belly shaking laughs with tears leaking from his eyes.

"Dad?" I asked alarmed. Maybe he finally cracked. I knew this was going to happen. 'What's going on?"

He wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes. "I can't wait to hear what Renee has to say about this after _you_ tell her."

All of the relief I was being to feel flew out of me with a whoosh like a deflating balloon. I felt Edward's hand making comforting circles on my back but it didn't do much good. Charlie handed me the phone with a grin on his face.

"You want me to call her _now_?" I asked appalled.

"No time like the present." Charlie replied.

I hesitantly dialed the number praying that she wouldn't answer and I could just leave a message. Fate wasn't on my side. She answered.

"Hi Mom." I said swallowing passed the sudden lump that formed in my throat. Edward was still making the soothing circling motions on my back.

"Bella Baby, it's good to hear from you. How are you?'

"Good, mom, I'm good."

"Bella? You don't sound like you. Is something wrong? Did you get into another fight with Edward? Did he leave you again?" Her voice was all sympathy as she shot questions at me like a journalist on crack.

"Uh, no Mom. Nothing like that. I, uh, actually have some pretty great news." At least _I_ thought so. I had no idea how Renee would respond.

"You're getting married aren't you?" She asked. There wasn't even an inkling of surprise in her voice. I was momentarily stunned. "Bella, are you still there? That's it isn't it?"

"How…how did you know?" I asked her when I was finally able to form a coherent word.

"Oh, baby. A mom just knows these things. I had a sense about the two of you since he came back. He would be a fool to let you get away from him again."

"You're not _mad_? I mean all that talk about marrying young being a big mistake…?"

"For _me_, Bella. A big mistake for _me_. Anyone with eyes can see how you and Edward are with each other. And I know you. You don't make rash, impulsive decisions like I do. You've always been the adult in our relationship. If you're sure than I'm sure."

I didn't know what to say at that point. I was stunned speechless. After some more small talk with Renee, who very definitely wanted to be a part of the wedding planning, I hung up and stared at both Edward, who looked pleased and my dad, who looked just as shocked as I was.

"Alice won." I announced.

_End Flashback_

The doorbell downstairs rang and I knew Alice was here. I could hear Charlie grumble incoherently as he made his way to the door to let her in. I heard something come from his mouth that sounded like "ungodly hour" before he opened the door to give Alice a cheerful hello. It _was_ an ungodly hour…5 am to be exact. Apparently, Alice felt she needed a lot of time to get me ready. Something that didn't sit well with my already fragile self esteem.

She burst into my door with a cosmetic bag in one hand and a duffel bag in the other.

'Good, you already showered and left your hair wet." She said giving me a once over. Then she peered at me more closely. "You didn't get much sleep last night did you?"

"No" I said derisively. "I kept imagining all the different things you were going to do to me."

She rolled her eyes at me. "Seriously, Bella. It's not torture."

"Feels like." I retorted with a snort.

Alice POV

This was going to be _fun_. Bella had played so easily into my hands. It was child's play really and I silently congratulated myself for my well thought out plan. I looked over Bella assessing the options as she looked at me warily.

"Okay." I finally said clapping my hands. "Off. Everything off."

A blush rose to her cheeks as she stripped down leaving on her bra and underwear.

"I said everything." I told her.

"Even…"

"Yes, yes." I was digging into my duffel bag to find what I needed. "We'll be sisters soon, no room for modesty here…ahh got it."

I showed Bella what was in my hands. She gulped eyeing the lacy blue thong and the matching lacy blue push up bra. "You want me to wear _that_?" She pointed at the beautiful garments as if they were rags. I was almost insulted.

"Every great outfit needs the proper foundation. One-No one wants to see your panty lines…hence the thong and two- this bra is perfect to show off your attributes in the top I picked out for you. Now get moving Swan." I said in my best drill sergeant impersonation.

"Yes Colonel Cullen." She responded with a smile and a salute.

After the underwear, I had Bella wiggle into black Capri cut, low rise skinny jeans that were so tight they could have been painted on. She had lost a lot of weight after we left but I was glad my assumptions on her size were correct.

Next came the top at which when I handed it to her she eyed it disbelievingly. "Uh, Alice I don't think this will fit. It looks a little small."

"Oh Bella. It's supposed to be that way. It cuts just above the navel. Here look" I said putting the top over her head. It too was tight. The blue was the exact shade that Edward liked on her. It was a flutter sleeve corset top with a scoop neck that exposed the top globes of her…ah...attributes. It barely qualified as a top bit the effect was devastating even before the make-up job.

Bella looked down at herself and frowned. "Are you _trying _to drive Edward crazy?" Then she looked up and must have noted the satisfied expression I was making. "Oh God. _That's_ it isn't it?" She looked appalled. "You _are _trying to make him crazy. This whole bet thing was a set up"

I was pleased she got it so quickly. "Now Bella. I still haven't paid Edward back from when he insisted we leave. I just wanted to make him sweat a little…not that he actually _can _sweat but you get the idea."

"And to think I fell right into your little prank. I can't do this Alice" She groaned.

"Of course you can." I said cheerfully. "Besides you lost the bet. You can't stiff me."

"Fine" She said grumbling "Do your worst." I knew I could get her when I threw her own honor code at her.

After she was dressed, I started on her hair, nails and make up. She couldn't be wearing her engagement ring with her nails looking like they did. I gave her a sexy smoky effect to her eyes and her lips a deep red pout. I flat ironed her hair to complete the look.

Pulling out a pair of low heeled shoes, I gave them to her. "I was looking at the stilettos but I didn't think you'd appreciate a broken ankle." It was killing me that she didn't have the proper footwear but I wanted revenge against Edward without having Bella get hurt in the process.

"Thank goodness for small favors." She replied.

When she bent down to slip the shoes on her feet, I noticed that the top of her thong was visible over her jeans. "Uh, Bella…you might not want to bend down so much at school today." I told her.

"Why?" Her expression was suspicious. Dare I tell her? No, that would make her even more self conscious.

"Never mind." I said shaking my head. " Here let's get a look at you." I eyed her from all angles. "Wait…I forgot one thing." I reached in my bag and found the small fake diamond stud I was looking for.

"What's that?"

"This is a belly button ring. Faux, of course since you don't have a piercing there." I inserted the accessory and took a look at my masterpiece. "Perfect! Go look in the mirror."

Bella gasped looking at her reflection. Could she see what I saw? She was transformed into "sex" personified…well as much as she could get away with in high school. Edward was going to go nuts. I wanted to shout with glee.

"Put on this trench coat." I said handing her the black coat.

"You just did all this to me and now you want to cover it up?"

"It's for maximum effect when you reveal yourself. Trust me."

She was hesitant but did as I asked and grabbed the purse I gave her along with her backpack.

"Ready?" She asked a little impatiently.

I looked at her suspiciously. Something was off. Of course! "Bella, hand me your bag." I held my hand out. She gave me the purse. "Not that one…your backpack."

"Why?" She asked cautiously. She hesitated too much so I took it from her. Opening it up I saw what she wanted to keep from me. Bella watched horrified as I pulled old jeans and a sweater from the bag.

"No Bella…you will not be changing your clothes at any time today." I told her satisfied that I thwarted her efforts to outwit me.

"You are one mean pixie." She said as we headed down the stairs.

"You remember that." I told her smugly.

Edward would be waiting for us at the school unaware of how I transformed his fiancé. I couldn't wait to see his reaction. This was going to be the most fun I have had all year.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N – Flutter Sleeve corset top by Victoria's Secret and Black Skinny capri's by Guess.


	22. Never Bet Against Alice Part 2

Edward POV

"Relax, Edward. I can feel the tension rolling off you in waves." Jasper told me as we waited for Alice and Bella to arrive at school. I had driven Jasper since Alice had virtually kicked me out of Bella's house at 2 in the morning and would be driving her to school. Now Jasper and I were both leaning on my car in the school parking lot.

"Sorry, Jazz. I can't help it." I told him honestly. Alice had told me to leave Bella's early last night to get some extra hunting in claiming I was going to need it. That alone made me unusually nervous. I complied, of course, all the while wondering what Alice had in store.

"Alice has dressed Bella up a number of times." Jasper noted. He was stating something that was entirely true. Alice had often chose to experiment her fashion sense on Bella before our absence however there was a particular mischief in Alice's eyes this time.

"This time is different. I can feel it."

"So you've suddenly become psychic now?" He said sarcastically.

"No. I just know." I said. Did he not see the malicious gleam in her eye as she made the so-called bet? She orchestrated the whole thing perfectly to her advantage and none of us were the wiser until it was too late. "I could only imagine what concoction of Alice's making that Bella will show up in. She didn't tell you, did she?"

"Yeah right." Jasper scoffed. "And risk having you find out? I don't think so. Besides you won't have to imagine for much longer. I can hear Alice's car now."

As if on cue, Alice's little car came speeding into the parking lot. Even though the spot next to my car was free, she parked nearly clear across the lot.

"We'll see you inside." Alice yelled out. "By Bella's locker." I watched her and Bella get out of the car and scurry inside the building. Even though I had very good eyesight, I couldn't get a clear view of Bella since Alice was blocking my line of vision. I was only able to see the back of her as they ran into the doors. The only thing I _could_ notice was Bella was wearing a long black trench.

"This isn't good at all." I muttered with a scowl.

"I may have to agree with you." Jasper said but couldn't suppress the chuckle that came out of his mouth soon afterwards. "Okay, lover boy. Let's get this over with."

Bella's full length locker door was open and although I couldn't see her yet I knew she was standing behind it. I also saw part of Alice's concealed body to. She must have heard us approach because suddenly from behind the locker door Alice's hand shot in a gesture telling us to stop.

"Stay right where you are. We're not ready for you yet." Alice said.

"Oh, come on Alice. The hair is fine." I heard Bella whine. I grinned, happy that she seemed to be enjoying this even less than I was. The grin didn't last long however when I saw a group of boys I never paid attention to walking down the hall, all of them eyeing Bella with their mouths gaped open.

"_Holy crap...is that Bella Swan?"_

"_Man, she is looking fine."_

"_I want to get me some of that."_

Their minds seemed to go blank when they saw me glare at them with nothing less that murder in my eyes and a low growl emitted unbidden from my throat.

Judging from the thoughts of the group that just passed by us, Bella looked very un-bella like and not in a way that was comforting to my self control. Admittedly, I had more patience than some but the threshold of that patience had just been crossed. "Alice." I said through gritted teeth.

"Okay, okay. Are you ready?" She said.

"Oh for God's sake Alice...cut the theatrics." Bella said as I saw her hand reach around for the handle of the locker and slam the door shut. When she turned to look at me I felt my whole center of gravity shift. Gone was my beautiful fresh faced Bella. In her place was this devastatingly sexy creature served up to tempt me.

I took in her face first. Alice had applied a professional hand with the cosmetics and the effect made Bella look like an ethereal temptress. I was entranced noting how the blue top accentuated her breasts and the tight jeans hugged her curves in all the right places. Alice had even given her a faux diamond belly button ring and I imagined myself removing it with my tongue. Wait a minute! Hold everything. My lusty thoughts suddenly came to a grinding halt.

"Holy hell!" I finally said my voice coming out sounding strangled even to my ears. Half the immature male cretins were already in love with Bella as it was. Now it seemed like the entire male population would be pining after her. I felt the jealous monster rage within me threatening to escape.

"Uh, Alice. Are you sure this was a good idea?" Jasper said. He must have noticed the swell of emotions running through me.

"Positive." She replied smugly sounding so wholly sure of herself. _Payback's a bitch, ain't it?_

She was doing this to punish me. It was all so clear now. Well I wasn't going to have it. No one was going to look at my Bella, _my fiancé_ inappropriately because of some scheme perpetrated by my sister for revenge. It was bad enough the boys did that already but now they had even more reason.

"Absolutely not." I almost shouted grabbing Bella's arm and pulling her with me as forcefully as I could without hurting her.

"Wait! Where are we going?" she cried out struggling out of my grip.

"You're going home to change." I told her.

"No Edward." Alice said taking Bella's other arm. "She lost the bet...she stays."

"Stop!" Bella said loudly then turned to me. "Edward, I can't go home. I have a test first period. I can't miss it."

"But, Bella." I pleaded. I saw tears suddenly spring to her eyes and I had no idea why. "Bella?" I asked tilting her head up so I could look at her closely trying to ascertain what caused her sudden distress.

"Don't…don't you think I look pretty?" She asked, her voice coming out a trembling whisper.

_Great Edward you made her cry. You better not make her ruin her mascara. I'll have to reapply it all over again. _This, of course, coming from Alice.

_For God sakes man, tell her you think she looks pretty. She thinks you don't like the way she looks and her self esteem just took a nose dive. _I heard Jasper's voice in my head.

She didn't think I thought her pretty? Was that what _this_ was about? I almost laughed at the absurd notion. As if she could just be merely pretty? But dressed like this…it was hard to form the words. Of course I preferred her fresh faced, girl-next door look. She truly didn't need any extra adornment. But if I were to be honest with myself, this version of Bella, all pout and sex, made my inner hormonal teenager fight to break free. _This_ Bella I did not want to share with _anyone_. If anyone was going to see her like this, it would be me and me alone. Not the whole damn school.

"Oh, Bella." I said wiping a stray tear from her cheek. "You're not just pretty. You're absolutely gorgeous…as you always are. I only reacted that way because my jealous nature got the best of me. You have to know that dressed like this, every boy…" I snarled out the word. "will by vying for your attention. I already feel like I am jockeying for position without you looking like you walked out of every man's fantasy playbook."

_That's better, Edward._

"Really?" She asked still looking uncertain.

I nodded. "Really, my love." I bent down to brush my lips across hers and couldn't help but deepen the kiss more than I had originally intended. She looked dazzled when I finally released her and I felt entirely pleased with myself. I felt the glare of several other male students bore into my back but I was the only one that could kiss her that way. If I had to continue with public displays of affection all day to keep them reminded of that, I would.

I heard Alice giggle and looked at her inquiringly. "Uh, Edward. I don't think that particular shade of lipstick looks as good on you as it does on Bella."

"Oh, hell." I grumbled wiping it off with the tissue she handed me. "You better give me some more tissues. I have a feeling I'll be needing more of them throughout the course of the day."

It was going to be one hell of a day.

English was first period and hence the test that Bella was so worried about missing. Briefly I calculated the odds of Bella coming home with me after the class but I knew she wouldn't. She would just claim she had missed far too much school this year already. I wanted to leave school early to get away from the torment but there was no way in hell I would leave Bella here alone… dressed like that.

Even the teacher was thinking about Bella in a way that a teacher should never think about a student. His little fantasy rang loud and clear in my head and it took everything I had not to launch over my desk and choke the life out of him. Bella clearly saw my tension and called me on it.

"What's the matter with you?" she whispered at me when she heard a low growl escape my mouth and saw that mu fingers were nearly embedded into the desk.

"I don't like the way they're thinking of you…even the damn teacher." Bella blushed scarlet like I knew she would. "After class I can take you home to change. You could come back and not miss much school at all." I pleaded with her wishing for once she would listen to reason.

"Are you crazy? Alice would kill me and dress me in something worse the next time. Besides Lauren Mallory dresses way more provocatively every day."

"But Lauren Mallory isn't my fiancée'. You are." It was getting harder to keep my voice down and I knew the teacher, lecher that he was, was going to come over here.

"Mr. Cullen…would you like to tell the class what has gotten you so excited. Was it perhaps the knowledge of an essay test on Faulkner next week?" Mr Brody said stopping at my desk and looked down at me.

"Yes, that's it sir." I told him not bothering to look him in the eye. If I did, I knew I wouldn't be able to contain myself.

He turned to Bella then his eyes drifting towards her chest. "And you Miss Swan?" _I bet those taste delicious._

CRACK! The edge of my desk broke off in my hand and everyone turned to look at me. Mr Brody glared down surprised at the piece of desk in my hand. "Sorry." I said with a smirk. "The wood must be rotten." I dared not bring any more attention to myself.

By the time it Bella had her gym class I was wound tighter than a rubber band stretched to full capacity. Damn Alice and her damn bet. I was making my way out to my car fully intending to listen to some soothing music with the hopes that it would take the edge off my anger when Alice ran over to me with a huge Cheshire cat grin on her face.

"How's it going?" She asked.

"As if you don't know." I hissed at her. "You did this all for the sole purpose of driving me mad and Bella is too honorable to go back on her word."

"Is it working?" She asked innocently.

"You know it is." I told her getting in my car, slamming the door and blasting the classical music cd I had in the disc player.

"It's only a few more hours Edward. I'm sure you'll manage…though try not to break any more desks if you please."

"I'm not making any promises." I told her.

She tapped my shoulder and I watched her walk away. Suddenly she stopped, then took off running after muttering an explicative I never heard her use. I tried to get a read on her thoughts but I got nothing. She was blocking me. This didn't bode well. Forgetting my plans to get some peace, I got out of the car and ran after her. I experienced a sense of dread when I noticed Alice was heading straight for the gym. Bella, I thought. Of course.

Alice POV

I would be in time. I thought to myself like a mantra as I headed toward the girls locker rooms. Edward would have my head with a big fat 'I told you so' if anything happened to Bella because of me. Plus I would never be able to forgive myself either and it would be entirely my fault. How could I not have seen this? It must have been an impulsive decision and I immediately cursed my faulty vision. I was so consumed with getting to Bella that I literally ran into Jasper on my way to Bella.

"Where's the fire, darlin'?" He asked noticing my distress.

"To the gym." I told him. "Oh and Jasper, whatever you do, DO NOT let Edward in the girl's locker room."

"What's going on?"

"Can't talk now" I told him already in motion again wishing I was able to run at my full speed. "Just remember what I said."

With any luck I would make it in time and no one would be the wiser.


	23. Boys and Bikes

Bella POV

"Crap, crap, crap." I muttered after stumbling for the fifth time on my way to the locker room before gym. "Damn Alice and her damn shoes." Without any more preambles, I took the stupid shoes off and ran barefoot to the gym. I knew was going to be late.

As I entered the locker room, I noticed that no one was there. Great, everyone must already be in the gym. That meant when I walked in, all eyes would be on me as the latecomer and of course, the coach would have something to say. How I hated being the center of attention. My outfit for the day didn't help any of course. Thinking back at Edward's reaction, I smothered a small smile. I had never seen him so out and out jealous before. It did worry me a bit however. I didn't want Edward exposing who he and his family were because he was being overly protective. There were a few times it had come close. Especially in English. I had no idea what he heard that would make him react so violently and part of me was glad I couldn't. It was disturbing enough to be leered at. Surely if Alice had seen Edward going overboard, she would never have dressed me like this, no matter how much she wanted her "revenge".

I was such in a rush that I messed up my locker combination three times trying get the stupid thing open. Then I heard a noise behind me. Maybe I wouldn't be the only one late to gym. That was a relief. When I started to squirm out of the ridiculously tight top Alice made me wear, I heard footfalls come closer to me. Heavy footfalls, ones that didn't belong to a female. Ones that definitely did _not_ belong in the girls' locker room.

My hands froze in place, no longer trying to take my shirt off.

"Don't stop." A deep male voice behind me said.

Startled, I whipped around to see Jeff, a new guy that just transferred in a few months ago. He was so big he could give Emmett some competition in the size department.

"You shouldn't be in here." I told him, pulling my shirt back down. The way he was looking at me was downright creepy and I thought I could almost feel my skin crawl under his gaze.

"I knew you'd be here. Waiting for me." As he walked closer to me, I retreated until my back hit the locker. There was nowhere else I could go. He had me effectively blocked in. I thought of the pepper spray I always kept in my bag but realized that I didn't _have_ my bag. I had the one Alice gave me. Crap!

"Are you freaking insane!" I yelled at him hoping that someone would hear me. Jeff just smiled eerily and shook his head.

"Insane? No. You see I have had my eye on you. I know you wore this just for me."

Okay, this was getting bad. At least it was only him and not a few drunken louts like there were in Port Angeles. But he was large. Linebacker large.

"I can assure you. I did not wear this for you." I told him scathingly hoping he would wake from his fantasy land and realize what he was doing before it was too late. Dear God, Edward would kill him.

"I think you need to leave, NOW." I heard Alice's voice say in a tone that had the threat of violence laced all of it. Alice! Thank God. She must have seen. I felt so much relief my legs nearly buckled beneath me.

Jeff turned to her and smiled. "Sorry, my mistake. I'm new here." He shrugged.

Really? He was going to use that lame excuse. Alice wasn't buying it.

"Yes, well just make sure you never make that _mistake_ again. Or any other _mistakes _that concern my friend Bella. Comprende?"

"Sure." He said and went to walk out the door.

"May I suggest using the other door? You don't want to run into her boyfriend." Alice called out to him contemptuously. Jeff quickly changed direction and went out the doors to the hallway.

As soon as he left, Alice ran over to me and embraced me in a strong hug.

"Oh Bella. I am so sorry. I didn't see this. He must have decided on impulse."

"Ow…Alice…can't …breathe." I groaned and she immediately loosened her hold.

"Sorry, sorry. Please say you'll forgive me." She pleaded, "He didn't hurt you did he?" She said inspecting me, her eyes wide with concern.

"No...just scared the hell out of me. He said he's been watching me. "I shuddered.

"Don't worry. I doubt he'll be bothering you again. I'll make sure of it." Her head turned to the doors. "Shit! – Listen Bella, Edward is going to come barging in here any minute. We can't let him know what happened. He'll go ballistic. Just follow my lead okay? I know you don't like to lie to him but trust me. You can tell him later when he asks you…and he will but he will have had ample time to calm down by then." Her voice was barely above a whisper and she spoke very fast but I got the gist of what she said.

Don't tell Edward…let her speak. Okay, I could do that, I thought as I nodded dumbly. I watched as Alice opened her pocketbook and grab some cosmetics out. What the hell did she have in mind?

She counted down 3-2-1 on her fingers than spoke ."Now Bella, when you need to reapply your lipstick after gym, make sure you use the lip pencil _after _the lipstick." Alice said loudly at the same time Edward came charging in. He skidded to a halt and watched us dumbfounded.

"Sorry." Jasper said with a shrug entering behind Edward. "I tried to keep him out but…"

"Bella, are you alright?" Edward asked me worriedly then looked at Alice.

"Why shouldn't she be Edward?" Alice asked him.

"Because you ran to the gym as if the hounds of hell were chasing you."

"And you automatically assumed something was wrong. " Alice finished for him. "Well there is." She said pouting.

"What?" He growled. I could tell his patience had reached the end of the line.

"A fashion emergency…that's what. I had to show Bella how to reapply her makeup after gym otherwise she just wouldn't look right."

Edward still looked suspicious as he turned to me. "Is this true?"

"I really don't know how to put it back on the way she did it." I told him with a shrug. Technically, it wasn't a lie. I really didn't have any idea how to achieve the look Alice created on me this morning. However, I was immensely grateful for the glitch in my brain that kept my thoughts silent from Edward. I knew without a doubt had he any clue as to what was really going on, it would be just as Alice said. There would be no containing him.

Edward still looked doubtful but he asked no more questions. He looked at Alice oddly and briefly I wondered what she was chanting in her head to keep him out. Jasper knew something was up as well. He looked at both Alice and I strangely and I knew he could feel the different emotions rolling off me, none of which could be caused my make up lessons.

"At this point I already missed most of gym so this is all a moot issue. There really is no point in going now" I said starting to leave.

Edward grabbed my hand and looked at me intently before bending down to kiss me. I knew he was silently trying to figure out if Alice had been telling the truth. "Let's sit in my car until lunch then." He said when his lips left mine.

"We'll meet you in the cafeteria." Jasper told us. Before we left, Alice gave me a pointed look. Don't tell Edward. Got it. I would have to distract him from asking any questions so I wouldn't have to lie. I could do that.

Edward didn't question me further about the "locker room incident" although I knew him well enough to sense his mind was brewing with questions. We sat in his car for the duration of the period. He held my hand, fiddling with the ring on my finger that he, himself had put there.

"I love the way this looks on your hand." He whispered. "Like it's always belonged there. I can't wait to call you my wife."

I didn't know how to reply with words so I leaned in to kiss him letting him know I felt the exact same way. He groaned and deepened the kiss molding his hand to the back of my neck to bring me closer. All too soon he pulled away and touched his forehead to mine.

"The way you look today…it's driving me crazy." He said breathing heavily.

"I believe that was Alice's intention." I pointed out matter-of-factly.

"Mmm. If she had dressed you like this for me alone, I would have to thank her." Edward's hand caressing my neck and shoulder was doing delicious things to my body. He began to nuzzle my neck and breathed in deeply. I could feel the whisper of his breath tickling me. I couldn't think straight.

I moaned and wrapped my arms around him. Suddenly he withdrew, raking his fingers through his hair. "I'm sorry Bella. I shouldn't behave like this, especially in the school parking lot. It's just that I can't think straight around you." I laughed suddenly and he looked at me questioningly.

"I was just thinking the exact same thing." I told him.

"C'mon, let's go." He said grinning, opening the door on his side of the car. "Before you get into anymore trouble."

I held back a snort. Trouble, I thought. That was becoming my middle name.

Lunch was the usual crowd. Angela, Ben, Jessica, Mike and Eric sat with us. I wondered briefly if they had ever noticed that Edward, Jasper and Alice never actually ate anything. If they did, not a word was said.

I saw Edward stiffen behind me and looked to see where the source if his sudden change of mood came from. Then I spotted it. Lauren had come over to our table and was whispering something in Jessica's ear that made her laugh. Since they were both looking in my direction, I assumed they were discussing me.

"Bella." Lauren said with a condescending note in her voice. "You _are_ aware that the ring finger on your left hand is kind of reserved for engagement rings and wedding bands, right? Or are you _trying_ to put ideas in Edward's head?"

I felt the heat rise to my cheeks and Edward placed a protective arm around my shoulders.

"Actually, Lauren." Alice started sounding just as patronizing. "Edward and Bella _are _getting married. He proposed this weekend."

Everyone's mouths gaped open in surprise and I wanted to crawl under the table. If it weren't for Edward's arm around me, I probably would have. Then Lauren started to laugh.

"Didn't your mother teach you about birth control? Or were you trying to trap him?"

"It's not…I mean…I'm not…" I stammered utterly mortified. I _knew_ this was going to happen. Of course the first assumption any one would make when they hear of two people in high school getting married is the girl has to be knocked up. Edward emitted a low growl and looked at Lauren with anger in his eyes.

"People do still marry for love." Edward said very softly but I could hear the barely contained rage in his voice. If Lauren knew what was good for her, she would shut up now.

"Well...duh. But not in high school."

"I suggest you keep your wrong opinions to yourself, Lauren. Otherwise Edward will get very angry." Jasper said trying to work some control over the situation. From what I could tell, Jasper's attempts at calming Edward down were having little effect.

She scoffed and flipped her hair behind her shoulders…it was such a Rosalie move, I almost laughed. "Oh, please. This news will be all over the school in minutes. Everyone will come to the same conclusion."

"Well I guess you'll just find out the truth in a few months then when I am still thinner than _you_." I told her scathingly. Alice looked at me with an approving smile.

"Well, _I _think the ring is beautiful. Congratulations to you both." Angela said sincerely. God bless you Angela, I thought.

It turned out that Lauren was right. Everyone _did_ find out and of course mostly everyone came to the same conclusion. I would just have to ride it out.

"I'm sorry." Edward told me on the way home. "You were right. They did make the wrong assumptions."

I waved away his apology. "No, it's my fault."

"Your fault?" He asked bewildered. "How is it your fault?"

"I should've never worn the ring to school." I sulked.

"Don't apologize for that. I love that you wear it. It'll be okay. The rumors will die down soon enough."

"I hope so. "

He gave my hand a squeeze. "We could always start a bigger rumor about someone else. I am privy to lots of useful information getting into peoples' heads like I do. Juicier gossip would take the heat off of you."

I smiled at him. "That's sweet but not necessary. I'll just deal."

Edward was driving at his usual fast pace but when we got closer to my house, he slowed down considerably. His expression was grim when I looked at him questioningly.

"Uh, Bella. Did you do anything recently to tick Charlie off?"

Now I was concerned. "No, why?" I answered apprehensively.

"Well, I can't hear _exactly_ what he is thinking. His thoughts are too muddled but he is very angry…at you."

"But I didn't do anything wrong."

"Since we are turning on to your street now I am sure we'll find out soon enough."

As we approached my house, I saw it. The source of Charlie's anger and now mine as well. My hands clenched into fists. Sitting in the driveway was my old fixer upper motorcycle. _Jake_. He did this and of course the tattle tale was nowhere to be found.

"Bella, what is _that_?" Edward said his voice sounding half strangled as he pointed to what was once part of my salvation (now my doom) when Edward had left.

I sighed. It was bound to come out sooner or later. "_That_ is my motorcycle."


	24. Explanations of Hallucinations

A/N: I am going away on a business trip so I don't know how long it will be until my next update so enjoy this extra long chapter. As always reviews are welcome.

Edward POV

"Bella, what is _that_?" I asked staring at the red death trap with wheels in Bella's driveway suddenly afraid if her answer.

Bella let out a long sigh. "_That_ is my motorcycle." She replied.

"_Your _motorcycle?" I asked hoping that my ears had deceived me and I heard wrong. The image of Bella on such a dangerous mode of transportation was horrifying to say the least. I tried to calm myself with the thought that she was sitting here safe beside me and not buried under that machine on the side of the road somewhere. The thing sat there mocking me, reminding me of all the mistakes I had made. Somehow I knew I had been the cause if Bella taking up this dangerous activity. All I needed was confirmation from Bella. It wasn't rational but I had a sudden urge to destroy it as if destroying I could erase all my previous wrongdoings, wrongdoings that I foolishly perceived were right at the time.

She nodded mutely still staring ahead at the offensive vehicle her arms crossed in front of her, a definite sign that she was angry…maybe just as much as Charlie was. "Might as well get this over with." She finally said already opening the car door to get out. Before she could, I grabbed her wrist effectively halting her. She looked at me surprised. I didn't care how illogical I was being, I wanted, no, _needed_ an explanation.

"What on earth were you thinking or were you…thinking, that is?" Bella winced and I immediately felt sorry. "I apologize. That came out wrong. It's just that the thought of you on that…that _thing_…well I can't even form the words."

"It was just a hobby I took up after you…well you know." Now it was my turn to wince. "Jake must have blown the whistle on me."

What did that mutt have to do with this? I wondered. Was he the one that put the ridiculous notion in her head that taking up riding would be a good thing, a _safe_ thing for her to do?

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN, I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE. GET YOUR BUTT IN THIS HOUSE RIGHT NOW!" Charlie yelled from inside the house.

"Great, he's even using my full name. Look, I'll explain everything later. Just let me deal with Charlie first."

I had no choice but to accept this. I would have to get the details later. "I'll be waiting in your room." I told her.

"I didn't expect anything else." Bella said caustically. I didn't mean to act like the overbearing fiancé however I couldn't let this go for some reason.

She walked to the house slowly like she was on her way to her execution. I almost laughed at the absurdity. Despite how angry Charlie was with Bella, I knew he probably wouldn't be too hard on her. Not as hard as I would be, were she my daughter. Charlie was all bark and little bite. Speaking of barks, I could smell the distinct odor of dog not too far away. When I was sure Bella was safely ensconced in the house, I drove off a little to hide my car and got out.

"You can come out from hiding mutt. I can smell you."

Jacob Black jumped down from the tree that overlooked Bella's bedroom window, the same tree I used nightly to gain entrance into her room. I felt a tightening in my gut at the thought that he could have used the very same means of entry or worse yet watched us when we thought we were alone. But that was impossible, I thought trying to calm myself. I would have smelled his stench immediately.

"I wasn't hiding, parasite." He said with a smirk on his face. _I wanted to enjoy the fireworks._

"What is the meaning of this? " I asked him through clenched teeth. I had to remind myself to stay composed. There could be no fight here, not with Bella and Charlie so close. Not to mention the neighbors that would get a show right out of a horror movie.

He shrugged, unconcerned that I was so close to beating him to a pulp. "Just thought Charlie would be interested in what Bella was up to." _If I can't see her I made damn sure he can't either._

Ahh, so that was his game. He thought to get Bella grounded. If he only knew that regardless, I would spend every night with her as I always did, he might not have bothered. Just as well. I had no intention of enlightening him. There was no telling of what he would do then.

"How very adolescent of you, _pup_. I warned you to stay away from her." I spat out almost wishing he would make the first move. But he looked wary now, like he knew I could read his thoughts, see his motives.

"I don't take orders from you, bloodsucker. She's not one of yours." _Not yet, not ever._

But she would be one of mine, I thought with a sense of satisfaction. It was amazing how much my position on that had changed since my return. I wouldn't let Jacob in on that fact however. It would only provoke the dog more and I didn't want to goad him into a reaction everyone would regret.

"Why don't you just leave? Go back to the hell where you came from." He told me when I didn't answer him.

If only he knew that the months spent without my Bella-and yes she was mine- was hell. A hell like I had never known before and never wanted to know again.

"Funny. I was just going to tell you the same thing."

I really wanted to end this conversation but I wasn't about to leave before he did. Inside the house I could hear the argument that ensued between Bella and her father.

"_Isabella Marie Swan…you are grounded!" Charlie yelled. _I could almost sense his face mottled red in anger.

"_For what?" Bella yelled back indignantly._

"Well, I got what I came for" Jacob said with a self satisfied grin. I wanted to punch it right off his face. "See ya, leech."

He backed away not wanting to turn his back on me and ran off. My full attention was now tuned into the war going on inside as I stealthily made my way into Bella's room and waited for her on the bed.

"_For riding motorcycles, that's what!"_

"_You never said I couldn't" _

"_I never said…? You can barely walk across a flat surface without tripping…it was implied."_

I cringed on Bella's behalf. She hated that she was clumsy but to have Charlie throw it in her face like that was unnecessarily hurtful. I wanted to come to her defense but he couldn't know that I was here. I also couldn't completely disagree with him either. Sadly enough I knew he was being unkind because he worried, as did I.

"_That's great, dad…just great. Thanks a whole hell of a lot. It's nice to know you have such confidence in me." _

"_I'm sorry Bella but you know it's true. You could have been hurt so easily."_

"_I had been riding that motorcycle for months. Obviously I suffered no great damage."_

Well, that phrasing was odd. "No great damage" obviously was Bella's way of stating but not stating that she had gotten hurt but not enough to sustain long term injury. This concerned me and only strengthened my resolve that there could be no more motorcycle riding. It would only be a matter of time before she would get badly hurt. I didn't even want to think of the ramifications if that were to happen.

"_I don't care. You're still grounded." _It was apparent that Bella got her stubbornness from Charlie.

"_You can't ground me. I'm 18."_

"_You're still under my roof." _Oh no, Charlie. Tell me you just didn't pull that card. Unfortunately, I didn't have to be able to read Bella's mind to know what was coming next.

"_That can be remedied." _Bella said in a determined voice. Then I heard stomping come halfway up the stairs then suddenly stop. _"Look dad, I don't want to fight with you. I really don't want to move out yet but I am 18, I am getting married this summer. Don't you think grounding me is a little futile at this point? I promise I'll get rid of the bike. I have no reason to ride it anymore anyway."_

Now that was interesting. What reason did she have for riding it in the first place? I would just have to wait for her to explain that one. Charlie's position had waned on the whole grounding matter. Bella's argument was logical and I knew punishment would no longer be an issue. He didn't want to fight with her anymore either, not when he knew he would be losing her in a few months anyway. I was also grateful Bella had agreed to get rid of the bike before I had to say anything. I knew Bella would not appreciate it if I treated her like the fragile human she was.

"_You're right Bella." _Charlie said. _"I don't want to fight with you with you either_. _I won't ground you but please don't…"_

"_I know, I know…no more motorcycles. I promise. Now, I am going to do some homework before cooking your dinner okay?"_

"_Okay…So...uh… what does Edward have to say about this motorcycle business?"_

"_I don't imagine he's very happy about it either."_

Now _that_ was a gross understatement as several other harsher adjectives came to mind. I waited patiently for Bella to enter her room. She was still wearing her trench coat as she barged in the room and threw her bag on the floor in a huff and I guessed that she didn't want to reveal what she was wearing underneath it to Charlie. He would have had apoplexy on the spot.

"Could this day get any worse?" It was a rhetorical question so I did not answer. I just raised my eyebrow at her and waited for her to continue with the tirade I knew was coming. She didn't disappoint as she paced around the room trying to organize her thoughts. She looked so adorable when she was angry.

"Ugh!" she groaned as she paced. I hid a smile so as not to raise her ire further. She continued speaking at an increasingly quick pace. "First, Alice makes me up at some ungodly hour to primp and preen me into the next Teen Vogue cover girl." She began ticking off her fingers. "Then I have to deal with the leers of the entire male population of the school, next I get accosted by the line backer from hell in the locker room, everyone thinks I'm pregnant and now my ex-best friend rats me out to my dad…ugh"

Red flag, red flag! My mind screamed at me. Although she spoke quickly, I caught every word and my mind seized on one thing, one dangerous tidbit of information that I didn't know about….accosted…by a linebacker? Someone accosted _my_ Bella and I wasn't informed until now?

"Wait. Go back. What did you just say?" I asked her sitting up from my relaxed position on the bed, all my muscles tensed now.

"I was just complaining about the day I had. You know, Alice, the whole school thinking I'm pregnant… Jake." Bella responded attempting to put on an innocent expression. She was definitely covering something up.

"You skipped over something." I informed her.

"I did?" She looked at me, her eyes wide.

"Bella" I warned. "What was it about the line backer from hell, _specifically_?"

"Oh, that." She gulped.

"Yes, _that._" I said grimly. There was no way I could let this go. I knew something was up with her and Alice in the locker room and I should have questioned them further about it then. All sorts of scenarios now rose to my mind, none of them good. If someone had hurt Bella, there would be hell to pay.

"It was nothing." Bella said with a wave of her hand.

"If it was nothing then why are you so hesitant to tell me about it?"

"Because you'll get upset." Of course, I thought. She wanted to protect _me_ and my feelings when it was so obvious that she was the one that needed protecting.

"I'm upset now." I took her hand in mine and looked into her eyes. "Bella, we've talked about this remember?" I said reminding her of the conversation we had to be truthful with each other.

She gave an exasperated sigh. "Okay, come on, let's go."

Now she had me confused. "Go? Where?"

"Your house." She said with a sigh as if was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Why?" I asked her cautiously trying to figure why she felt the need to go to my house to tell me whatever it was she needed to say.

"Reinforcements." Her answer was resolute. "If you want to know, I want to at least tell you some place where you can't overreact…err…much."

If I wasn't worried before, I certainly was now. She wanted to go to my house so my family could prevent me from doing whatever it was I would want to do after hearing Bella out? The scenarios in my brain were getting worse and more vivid as the conversation wore on.

"Fine but when we get there I want details. _All_ of them."

She nodded her consent and made some excuse to Charlie that she had to go to the library for research on an assignment. When we drove off in my car, I decided to ask her about the motorcycle. If I couldn't get an immediate answer on one issue, I was going to at least get some answers on another one.

Forcing a smile I tried to keep still the less then productive emotions rolling through me as my hands tightly clenched the steering wheel.

"So about this motorcycle." I started.

"What about it?" Bella asked me cautiously.

"I can't picture it." I told her. "It just doesn't seem like the type of thing you would do."

"Well, you don't have to worry about it anymore. I promised Charlie no more bikes."

Yes, she had promised him and I didn't doubt she would not break it however that wasn't really what I was concerned about.

"I'm relieved that is the case however I am curious as to why you took up such a dangerous activity in the first place." I was pleased with myself that I could discuss this rationally despite the waves of fear I felt at just the mere thought of her doing anything that could harm her. But I knew Bella well, knew that she would react defensively and angrily. The last thing I wanted was another fight between us.

"It's silly really. And really doesn't matter at this point."

It did matter. Everything about Bella mattered to me. "Even still. I would like to know."

"You won't like it."

"I'm sure I won't" I told her taking her hand in mine and giving it a gentle squeeze. "Just humor me anyway."

She blew out a reluctant breath. "It started out as a lark really. You see I discovered by accident that when I was in a dangerous situation, I could hear your voice. "I sucked in a breath and waited for further explanation. She glanced at me nervously and I nodded for her to continue. "The first time I was in Port Angeles with Jessica. We went to the movies." She furrowed her brow in thought. "When we left, there were these guys on motorcycles that looked like the guys that harassed me there the last time. When I approached them…"

"You approached them?" I yelled nearly losing control of the wheel.

She winced. "Do you want to hear this or not?"

After taking several deep breaths I was finally able to speak. "Please continue." This was worse than I thought.

"As I was saying…when I approached them I could hear you voice telling me to stop...to turn around and walk away. The closer I got to them, the more insistent and worried your voice became. It felt like you were there with me again. It was a dream come true."

I should feel grateful that the me of her hallucinations was guiding her in such a potentially harmful situation but it pained me to realize that she was desperate enough to place herself in danger on purpose for an illusion. Angela had told me what happened that night but actually hearing the events unfold from Bella's point of view was nearly my undoing.

"What does this have to do with the motorcycle?" I had a feeling I already knew but I had to ask anyway.

"I'm getting to that." She said disgruntled. "So I noticed that my neighbor was getting rid of two motorcycles and I brought them to Jake to fix up. He's a good mechanic. Anyway, I wanted to see if I would be able to hear your voice again once I started to ride. And I was right. As soon as I turned on the motor you were there again telling me to stop, warning me desperately not to do it. I did it anyway as I am sure you already figured out. It just felt so good to have you there with me even though it was only a vision I conjured up." She placed her hand on my thigh in a calming gesture and I tensed because I knew she wasn't finished. "You wanted me to be honest so I will tell you the need for you over rode everything else and if I had to put myself in a dangerous situation to hear it, well than that's what I did.

I didn't know what to say-how to react. It was true. I did want her to be honest but I had never expected this. "You risked your...life…to hear my voice?" I barely wanted to think about it let alone say it out loud.

Her hand came up to caress my cheek. "But it's okay now. You're here. I wasn't lying to Charlie or to you when I said I had no need for such things anymore."

As if that was any consolation. The hallucinations I could understand. Had I not seen her face, heard her voice everywhere I went? But this?…To purposely put her life in danger? I quickly pulled over to the side of the road unable to drive anymore and with a strangled sob I hauled her into my arms and buried my face in her hair. I wasn't being rational, of course but I had an overwhelming need for this close physical contact.

"It's okay. I'm right here." Bella said soothingly stroking my hair. I held her tighter.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered. What had I done to this beautiful girl? I was amazed and honored that she could forgive me after all that I had unknowingly put her through.

"It's not your fault Edward. It was me. I was the one being stupid. I should never have told you."

"No" I said pulling back only slightly. "I'm glad you did. I needed to know."

When I was composed enough to drive again, we continued on to my house. As we came up the drive I noticed Alice standing impatiently in the open doorway. Seeing her automatically brought to mind why we were at my house in the first place and I tensed again for what was to come.


	25. If It's Not One Thing, It's Another

Alice POV

"Okay Alice…Edward is no where near us now. Can you please tell me what the hell was going on with Bella before her gym class?" Jasper asked me in an exasperated tone as we entered the front door of our house. I was thankful he didn't question me about it earlier when Edward was in the vicinity but he knew why I didn't tell him. Jasper wasn't as apt in hiding his thoughts from Edward as I was.

Emmett and Rosalie who were in the middle of a fierce battle on an Xbox game were suddenly interested in our conversation.

"What's the matter with Bella, now? Did she hit her head on the locker door? Slip and fall in the shower maybe?" Rosalie snorted.

"No, Rose. I said turning on her with a glare. "She was very nearly attacked."

"What?" Emmett shouted nearly shaking the timbers of the house.

"Did you say Bella was attacked?" Esme said running into the room full of motherly concern. "Is she alright?"

"She's fine, Esme. I got to her in time. Thank goodness." Edward would never forgive me if something had happened. "It's all my fault." I told them remorsefully.

"How could it be _your_ fault?" Rosalie wanted to know.

"Do you recall the bet I made with Bella?" They all nodded and waited for me to continue. "Well, I kind of dressed her a bit on the provocative side today."

"A bit?" Jasper questioned, the sarcasm apparent in his tone.

"Okay…more than a bit." I conceded not wanting to have to explain myself to the highly curious room. "I wanted to get back Edward you see…for leaving…for making _us_ leave so I planned the whole thing out. To dress Bella in a way that would drive Edward bonkers." I told them honestly.

Emmett let out a loud guffaw. "I bet it worked."

"It did" I admitted. "All too well. The problem was, it had much the same effect on many of the male students in the school and I dare say some of the female ones."

"Poor Bella. She had no idea what she was in for did she?" Esme gave a sympathetic shake of her head.

"No and that's why it's all my fault. A new student, obviously one that wasn't aware that Bella is irrefutably with Edward, cornered her in the locker room of the gym right before she started to change her clothes."

Jasper began rubbing my arm in a comforting motion. "It's alright, darlin'" he soothed.

"He didn't…" Esme said with a gasp.

"No. I chased him out before he could do anything."

"But he would have." Rosalie stated confirming what we all knew.

"Yes, Rose" I looked directly at her so she could see the full implication of my words. "He would have."

I realized then, judging by the horrified expression on Rosalie's face, that as much as she may have resented Bella, Rose was extremely angered on Bella's behalf. What could have happened played heavily in her mind.

"Does Edward know?" Esme asked tentatively. She, like Jasper and I, feared the consequences of Edward's knowledge of this event. Rosalie and Emmett both wanted vengeance. I could read it on their faces even if I couldn't read their thoughts.

"Not yet…but Bella is bringing him here to tell him. She wants us to be able to stop him from getting revenge…something she would be unable to do if she told him on her own." I looked pointedly at Emmett and Rosalie to make sure they understood my meaning. In no way could they goad Edward into killing the human. It would only end badly for all of us. "I think I hear them now." I said as I approached the door and opening it.

Sure enough, Edward's headlights blinded me as soon as they came up the drive. I waited in the doorway, still unsure of how to both explain and apologize. Edward was going to be furious with me for inadvertently placing Bella's life in danger. Hell, _I _was furious with me. The whole event could be downplayed, however. It wasn't as if Bella was actually harmed in anyway. The brute never got close enough to touch her. That would probably be best. It was too late to lie and Bella wouldn't want to lie to Edward anyway.

Edward's face looked grim as he got out of the car while Bella looked anxious.

"I'm sorry Alice." Bella apologized as they both walked up to the door. Edward gave her a look to as if to say 'don't be ridiculous'. I wanted to tell her the same thing. She had nothing to apologize for.

"No, Bella. Don't apologize. You did the right thing by bringing him here."

Edward stayed ominously quiet as we walked into the house. Much was brewing under his surface.

"Yes Alice much _is_ brewing." He snapped at me in warning making me wince. Something else was going on, something I didn't know about.

"Motorcycles." He grumbled answering my unasked question. This time _Bella _winced. _Motorcycles?_ This was obviously a story for another time.

"Oh my, Alice." Esme gaped looking at Bella who had not changed her clothes from this morning. "I see what you mean."

"Yes...well…er...um…it seemed like a good idea at the time." I tried to explain but even to my own ears I sounded lame. It really _had_ seemed like a good idea but in the wake of what almost occurred, it was a horribly ill conceived notion.

"Holy crap Bella! Aren't you a hottie?" Emmett said surprised, to which Rosalie elbowed him in the gut and Edward growled at him. Bella blushed crimson red as she crossed her arms over herself in an attempt to cover herself up.

"For crying out loud, stop staring at the poor girl. You're making her uncomfortable." I yelled at them.

"ENOUGH!" Edward yelled, all pretense of tolerance suddenly snapping. "Would someone tell me WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" He looked at each of us individually finally settling his unnerving gaze on me.

"Nothing happened…not really." Bella said coming to my defense.

"Then why the need for 'reinforcements'? He asked with air quotes.

"Because of your predictable tendency to over react." I told him. "Nothing really happened. Someone approached her in the girls' locker room and made her very uncomfortable. I rectified the situation."

"When you say someone, do you mean a _male_ someone?" Edward asked through gritted teeth, his hands clenched into fists at his sides.

I rolled my eyes at him. "Well...duh." As if she would be uncomfortable by another female in the girls' locker room.

He glared at me as he heard my thoughts. Note to self; avoid sarcasm when Edward is angry. He nodded in agreement.

"Show me." Edward said. I knew what he was asking for so I showed him my memory of what happened. His whole body tensed and he released a low hiss as I played back the events in their entirety. Thankfully that kid didn't get any closer to Bella or God forbid touch her in anyway. There would be no stopping any member of my family then, provided I wanted to stop them if that were the case.

"And if you didn't get there in time?" Edward asked when the vision ended.

I shook my head. That he didn't need to see. "I'm sorry, Edward. I won't show you that."

"Alice…"

"Stop interrogating her, Edward. Enough." Jasper interceded on my behalf, instinctively stepping in between us in a protective stance.

He turned swiftly to Bella then to look at her questioningly knowing any further questioning of me would have to go through Jasper. "What exactly did he say to you?" he asked her. Bella bit her lower lip in uncertainty. I could tell she didn't want to tell him.

"It was really nothing of any importance." Bella said with a dismissive wave of her hand.

"Bella…please. For my own sanity, I need to know." He held her to him then, wrapping her in his embrace as if to shield her from what had already occurred.

"You have to promise you won't do anything."

"I don't think I can do that."

"Then I won't tell you." She told him with a stubborn tilt to her chin.

I knew Bella would win this argument. Edward was at a disadvantage since he couldn't just pluck the information from her mind and her insistence of procuring a promise out of him was a brilliant move.

"Okay fine_. I_ won't touch him." Edward gave a knowing look to Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie. They nodded back at him in full understanding of what he meant. Unfortunately for him, Bella caught the silent message.

"No Edward. Nobody touches him. I won't let all of you risk exposing yourselves because of this jerk. Please." Bella demanded stepping back from his arms and looking at him pleadingly.

There was a moment of tense silence as Edward inwardly debated with himself. He sighed. "You win." Edward reluctantly conceded. "Nobody touches him."

Bella paused, hew brows furrowed in thought. I could tell she was trying to think of the easiest way possible but I already saw the outcome, there was no easy way. No matter what she said or how she tried to sugarcoat the words, Edward was going to react badly.

"It's okay Bella, just tell us." Esme said comfortingly giving a reproachful look at Edward in warning. Little good it would do though.

Bella nodded and exhaled heavily. "Okay. So I was getting ready to change into my gym uniform when I heard footsteps approaching. Startled, I turned around to see the new kid, Jeff, standing there. I admit... it was creepy. He told me not to stop…changing my clothes, that is." She said with an involuntary shudder that did not go unnoticed by Edward. He growled low in his chest. "I told him to leave and hesaidhehadhiseyeonmeand ." She said really fast lumping all of her words together.

"Excuse me…what?" Emmett was the first to ask. "I didn't understand a damn word of that."

"I said hesaidhehadhiseyeonmeand ."

"Bella, I know what you're trying to do and it won't work." I told her. "She _said_ he said he had his eye on her and he thought she wore the outfit just for him." I finished with a cringe knowing what was coming next.

"HE SAID WHAT?"

"Edward calm down. Nothing happened. Nothing. Alice came in and got rid of him."

"He's been watching you Bella? How could I not have noticed that? "

Here it comes, I thought. This is where Edward has to blame himself.

"Yes, it is my fault, Alice." He looked at me with a tortured expression.

"Oh, get over yourself Edward." Rosalie interrupted. "Not everything that happens to Bella is your fault. She'd be the first one to tell you that."

"She's right dude. It's not your fault the guy is a lewd peeping tom." Emmett told him.

Edward scrubbed his face with his hands. "We all know what would have happened if Alice didn't show up." He looked at Bella. "I'm sorry. I thought I could keep my promise Bella but I don't think I can. The thought of anything happening further with this guy, well I can't even think straight."

"NO!" Bella. Esme and I yelled at the same time.

"No good can come of this. You promised Edward. Please don't break it." Bella urged taking his hands in her own.

_You don't want to shatter her faith in you Edward. Don't break another promise to her. You've broken so many already. _I mentally warned him.

Edward's shoulders slumped in defeat and he kissed her forehead tenderly. "I'm sorry my love. I'll keep my word."

"Well, we didn't promise anything." Rosalie said looking at the rest of us. "We can't let this creep get away with it."

Their arguing voices drifted off into the distance as I felt myself being tunneled into a vision. It was blurry with just random images at first. I saw the dense forest through rain fall and flashes of red moving quickly through the trees.

I gasped. "Stop Arguing." I demanded. "We've got bigger fish to fry."

They all became quiet at the same time and stared at me expectantly.

"What is it Alice? What did you see?" Jasper asked me concerned.

"Victoria."


	26. From Bad to Possibly Worse

**Author's Note:** I just want to add an explanation in response to some reviews on the last chapter. Firstly, when I had planned to write the whole Alice revenge subplot, it was originally intended as fluff but I added in the "linebacker from hell" as a catalyst for Rosalie to soften her attitude towards Bella since Rosalie knows what it feels like to be violated and she would feel some sympathy towards Bella even though Bella wasn't raped. Secondly, I never meant Edward to seem like the bad guy here. It's just that in Stephenie Meyer's own words: "Edward's big mistake is overreaction. It's in his nature to be too extreme…He's a very all-or-nothing kind of person, and it makes him unreasonable." It is also his nature to shoulder the blame even when it isn't his fault. Don't worry though; Edward still hasn't had his say to Alice yet. Thirdly and lastly, I tried to keep in the spirit of the books when it came to Alice as well as the rest of the family's sudden departure. In "New Moon", Alice never took any blame for leaving Bella behind. But if you look back at the series and have read the history of the books as well as "Midnight Sun", you will note that the whole family had uprooted themselves before for upon another member's request (i.e. : Emmett and Rosalie) so of course they would leave if Edward had asked them too since he never made that request before. Quoting Stephenie again but "Edward sees himself as a soulless monster destroying Bella's life and endangering her afterlife. The incident with Jasper acts as a catalyst, forcing him to act. He is determined to save Bella. He thinks the best way to do this is to take the vampires out of her life", hence the whole family has to leave. Besides Edward would have never realized the true depth of Bella's love for him had they never left Forks.

Okay, enough babbling and on with the story.

Bella POV

"What is it Alice? What did you see?" Jasper asked Alice.

"Victoria." She answered. That one word was enough. Jeff was no longer an immediate issue, not with Victoria looming so close on the horizon.

The mere mention of her name nearly brought me to borderline hysterics. I felt my breath hitch and my hands tremble. Somehow I had fooled myself into believing any threats by her were over but in the back of my mind I always knew that she would return someday. It looked like that day was finally here. I found it ironic that it wasn't so long ago that I would have begged for her to kill me should she have gotten to me but now I wanted nothing more than to live my life with Edward by my side. I felt Edwards's cools arms wrap around me in comfort as he spoke to me in calming, dulcet tones.

"It's okay. She won't touch you _or_ Charlie." He whispered close to my ear in his soothing velvet voice. He was so positive in his declaration that I almost believed him; I wanted desperately to believe him. However, my concern was more for Charlie and my soon to be family than myself.

"When and where Alice?" He turned to Alice and asked her. Although he was trying to calm me, I could feel the tension in his body.

There was a void look in her eyes as Alice was fully entranced in her vision. I could tell Edward was right in the vision with her, seeing what she saw.

"It's now or very soon. She's in the forest, running near the Quileute border. She knows we're back and is trying to figure out a way to get past us." Alice said still concentrating on the images in her head.

"What are we waiting for…let's go get her." Emmett said enthusiastically punching his fist into his hand.

"Wait!…she's running from something… Damn! Everything went black."

"The wolves." Jasper said explaining to the others about Alice's blind spot when the wolves were close. "Alice can't see past the wolves. They must be chasing her."

My mind briefly went to Jacob. Was he part of the group chasing Victoria? Would he be injured because of me? I mentally shook off the thought. Jacob had hurt me, had betrayed me because of his jealousies and his inability to let go of something that was never his. How could I think sympathetically of Jacob when I was in Edward's arms? But I did because at one point he _was_ my friend, the sun in my dark world. How quickly he had changed into someone I barely knew.

"She's ours." Emmett retorted like a child who had his favorite toy taken away from him. His voice infiltrated my morose train of thought and I was thrust back into the matters at hand.

"I'd rather have none of my family harmed so if the wolves get her first, so be it." Esme stated giving Emmett a reproachful look.

I sided with Esme on this. There was no way I wanted them hurt or possibly killed because of me. "She's right." I told them. "Let the pack have her." I didn't want anyone harmed but I knew who I couldn't live without. "Do you see anything else Alice?"

Alice shook her head sadly. "No, it's all dark. I'm so sorry. I can't see anything."

If there were any casualties I was certain I would hear about it from Billy or even Jacob himself. Billy would no doubt blame me as I knew I would blame myself.

"It's alright Alice." Jasper said embracing her in a reassuring hug. "Victoria didn't expect so many enemies in the area." He informed us drawing on his military knowledge and his intuitiveness. "She'll probably go off and lick her wounds, so to speak and try to come up with a new strategy."

"We'll be ready for her." Edward said clenching his jaw.

"No!" I said turning to face him gripping his shirt. "No one gets hurt. Not because of me. I won't allow it." As if I had any say in the matter. But I needed to say it anyway.

"Bella" he sighed in a placating tone smoothing my hair behind my ear. I felt the electricity of his touch seep into me and I resisted the urge to lean into his hand. I would not be distracted. "There are seven of us and only one of her."

"And if you factor in the wolves…there's no telling how many of them there are now." Jasper told him.

Edwards head whipped around to glower at his brother. "You're not suggesting we align ourselves with those mutts, are _you_?" he sneered, his opinion evident in the harsh planes of his face.

"We don't have to. They have been protecting Bella for months. If anything, they want to kill Victoria just as much as we do."

"It's true." I nodded. "First with Laurent and then right before you came back, they chased Victoria off."

I could tell Edward did not appreciate the reminder of what went on in his absence judging by the pained look on his face and I felt immediately remorseful for saying anything at all. "I'm sorry." I told him knowing he was internally chastising himself yet again for leaving. "Please don't continue to do this to yourself Edward. The past is over. I'm okay and we're together. That's all that matters." And it was true. He would never forgive himself for his past decisions. Instinctively I knew that even though I forgave him for it all. I just hoped it was enough for both of us.

He held me closer, resting his lips on the top of my head. "I know my love, I know."

"What do you think Victoria will do?" Rosalie asked Jasper for all of us.

He shrugged. "The only thing that makes sense is for her to seek back up or allies to aid her. She must know that between us and the wolf pack she can never win on her own."

"Does she even _have_ any allies?" Esme asked.

Edward was the one that answered her. He looked deep in thought as he spoke. "She's a nomad, a rogue. In the whole time I was tracking her, she wasn't with anyone else."

"You were tracking Victoria!" I yelled separating from his embrace to look up at him utterly horrified. I shuddered as the thoughts flooded through my mind at what could have happened and damned my all too vivid imagination.

He looked unconcerned as he looked down at me. 'It's of no consequence. As you can see, I wasn't very good at it."

Of no consequence, my ass, I wanted to shout. She could have killed him. I wrapped my arms around him again relishing in the fact that he was here with me and not having been burned in a funeral pyre somewhere.

"It's alright, love. I'm right here." He assured, holding me close to him once again.

"So if she has no known allies, then what?" Rosalie asked as if I hadn't even spoken.

My brain went into overload then as I started to put pieces of an uncut puzzle together and gasped as I came up with the absolute worst case scenario.

"What is it Bella?" Jasper asked looking at me curiously noting the expression on my face. I wondered if I looked as green as I felt. "Have you thought of something? "

"Unfortunately, I have." I told all of them, praying that I was wrong, that it wouldn't come to that. "Since we doubt she has any of her own cronies, what if…what if she were to create her own? I mean she is a vampire, right? With venom? I know it takes a lot of restraint to take someone's blood without killing them but what if _she _could?" I watched each of their faces as the implications settle in.

"Damn, Bella. A newborn army. They would defeat us all." Emmett breathed. He saw the possibilities just as I did.

If possible, I saw Edward's face turn paler than it's usual pallor. His jaw was set in a grim line and I could swear I saw a muscle tick by his eye. He even knew I could be right. It was one of the times I wish I wasn't.

Jasper looked doubtful and for that I was eminently grateful. He shook his head. "I admit it has merit but I have worked with newborns before. Training them is a long, arduous task. I don't think Victoria has the patience for that besides she would need help."

"But it is possible." Edward asked him bleakly.

"Yes" he confirmed. "It is possible."

"I'll keep watch for Victoria, Edward." Alice said determinedly. "No one touches my family." She gave me a look meant to reassure me. It didn't even come close.

Edward POV

How had things gotten so completely out of hand, so completely out of my control? I thought to myself as I lay with Bella on our bed in my room, her head on my chest. She had remained unusually quiet the rest of the afternoon as the rest of us talked about possible strategies and it worried me.

We had told Carlisle as soon as he came home from the hospital and he was concerned but not overly worried which relieved me. He didn't think there was a likelihood of Victoria raising a newborn army either. But she would do something he added.

"Bella, love." I said stroking her arm lazily. "I have to get you home. Charlie will be worried. You usually don't spend this long at the library." I joked trying to coax a laugh out of her.

She gave her smile little effort but I was just happy to get a response. "I suppose your right." She said getting up and putting on her shoes. My eyes drifted to her bent figure and I saw a hint of the g-string she wore underneath her pants. I scrubbed my face with my hand and groaned.

"What's the matter?"

"Here we are in my bedroom, on a bed, with you wearing those sinful under garments and I didn't even take advantage of it."

She gave me a genuine smile then. "Alice did say the perfect foundation to emphasize any outfit was what you wore underneath."

"I hope she bought more of them for you. I won't let them go to waste next time." I said playfully lifting her up so she was lying on top of me. My lips settled on hers in a passionate kiss as my arms went around her to hold her more closely to me. I craved this, needed her touch, her warmth surrounding me.

I didn't want to worry about Victoria, about Jacob or any of the kids at school. I just wanted to concentrate on my Bella and how happy and complete she made me. I didn't want to waste any time, not when I didn't know how much time we had left.

"Mmm, that was nice." Bella said with a satisfied sigh.

"I was hoping for better than just nice." I told her with a smile to let her know I was joking.

"How about wondrous and electrifying."

"I like those descriptions much better." I said playfully nipping at her earlobe with my lips.

"Do I have to go home?"

"I would like nothing more than for you to stay however; I don't think you want to get on Charlie's bad side right now. He's had a tough day."

"I suppose you're right. As always." She grimaced as she rolled off me and got up. She turned to me then with a thoughtful expression on her face.

"I was thinking…" she started. Oh no. Whatever was going through her head, I could tell I would not like.

"What, love?"

"What if we give Victoria what she wants?"

I hoped I did not hear her correctly. "What do you mean?" I forced the words from my throat as I sat up bracing myself for what was to come.

"Instead of playing this never ending cat and mouse game with her that can only escalate, why don't we give her me?"

I was off the bed like a shot as pain...scorching, blinding, white hot pain coursed through me just imagining it. "Absolutely NOT!" What was this about? Did she mean to set herself up as bait? She at least had the good grace to wince.

"It makes more sense than waiting around to see what she will do, Edward. Just think about it. I could appear vulnerable in the woods and the rest of you would lie in wait for her. The minute she got too close, you all could pounce. Problem solved." She was so blasé about it like it never even occurred to her that things could go horribly wrong. I adored her for the fact she would do anything to protect my family but we were vampires. We could handle ourselves with another vampire.

"Problem solved? Just like that?" I questioned her disbelievingly. "And what happens if she's quicker than we are?" I trembled at the thought of Bella lying bloody and lifeless on the forest floor.

"She won't be. You're quicker." Bella was so positive she was right in this.

"No, No, No. I forbid it." I had to keep myself from stomping my foot on the floor like an errant five year old. "Bella Swan you will erase that thought from your head right now." I reigned in my anger when I saw the shocked expression on her face. I embraced her again, needing to touch her. "I'm sorry. I know you think it's a good idea but you're talking about potentially sacrificing yourself. I can't live with that. We'll find another way. I _won't_, I _can't_ risk losing you again."

"It was just a thought." She said mumbling into my shirt.

"I know you're just trying to help" I told her breathing a sigh of relief that she would forget the dangerous course of action. "I'm sorry I reacted badly." And I truly was bit I wasn't sorry about the outcome.

"It's okay. I've come to expect it from you."

I grinned down at her. She knew me so well and yet she was still with me, still loving me. For that I was profoundly humbled. 'C'mon, let's get you home."

At Alice's insistence, she came with us to Bella's. I knew she wanted to talk to me so I consented to have hr tag along. She could get back on her own. I would be staying with Bella for the night. After we dropped Bella off, I pulled into a secluded side street near Bella's house and waited for Alice to speak.

She looked like she was about to cry if she could. I read her thoughts and knew she want trying to manipulate me but I wanted to hear her say the words out loud just the same.

"About today…"she started. "I am so, so, sorry Edward. I never meant for Bella to get hurt in any way."

"I know Alice." I said resigned but unwilling to let her off the hook completely. "You meant to pay be back for my previous transgressions but you didn't think about the consequences did you? I am _furious_ Alice, furious. It was just a joke to you, wasn't it? Let's drive Edward crazy, huh? Let's see how far I can push Edward before he breaks? Well it worked Alice. Are you happy now?" I yelled banging the steering wheel almost making it crack in two.

"I only meant to…" Alice began. I didn't give her a chance to finish.

"I know, I know…to pay me back for leaving…for making you leave. Well you know what Alice? I admit I made the biggest mistake of my miserable life by leaving but no one made _you_ leave Alice. You could have stayed."

"I left for _you_, Edward. For you and your damn misguided perceptions. _You_ were the one that wanted all the vampires out of Bella's life. You are the one that thought we were all a danger to her. It didn't matter to you how much it hurt her when we left, how much danger she could get into in our absence you just wanted to have your way and you got it and she almost died because of it. I would have stayed but I left for you, damnit!" She sobbed.

"Don't you _dare _tell me it didn't matter to me how hurt Bella was when we left. The knowledge of it very nearly _destroyed_ me." I couldn't let myself get so angered. Alice for all of her faults was still my sister. "So are you done, Alice? Have you gotten the revenge you wanted?" I whispered wearily.

"I never intended this." She said brokenly.

"Didn't you?" I replied. But I could read her mind, see that she didn't. She just wanted to make me crazed with lust and jealousy for my Bella. As if I didn't experience that enough on a daily basis.

""Do you think you can ever forgive me?" she sounded meek and I was disgusted with myself for making her feel this way. Alice was never meek despite her pixie like stature.

"Only if you tell me that you bought Bella more than one pair of lacy thongs." I grinned at her and I was happy to see the mischievous gleam back in her eyes.

"I knew you'd like those." She said giving me a playful punch in the arm. Her face turned somber then. "I can still see Bella as your wife and as one of us Edward. It's never faltered, not once. _That_ vision has only gotten stronger. I just wanted you to know that."

I nodded unable to speak of the joy that brought me. With all that had been revealed about Victoria, I still was unsure how about how it all would turn out. It brought me some solace to know that Alice's vision of the future, of our future was still clear.

"Show me." I whispered. And she did. It was beautiful. Bella and I were in our meadow. It was springtime; the flowers grew in abundance on the ground. Bella lay next to me with a purple flower on her hand, a golden wedding band on her finger. She was staring at me with such love in her eyes, butterscotch eyes that resembled mine. I closed my eyes committing the scene to memory. "Thank you Alice."

"You're very welcome."

Since I couldn't do anything about Victoria's threat to Bella, I decided to focus on another threat, one that I could do something about.

"So about this Jeff creep..." I said.

Alice looked at me warily. "Edward…you promised Bella." She warned.

"I promised Bella we wouldn't touch _him._"

I watched her focus on that particular vision and saw a smile spread over her face. "Oh, I see what you mean."

And she did. She did exactly.

Well, I hope I have sufficiently redeemed myself in this chapter and I hope you enjoyed it. Til next time…


	27. It Comes Crashing Down?

Jacob POV

We chased Icky Vicky to the Canadian border but lost her scent soon after. Her red hair flew in trails behind her as she made her escape and I heard her venomous laugh echo around me as she disappeared into the Canadian wilderness.

Damn the parasite bitch was fast!

Sam had us all regroup to return home to run patrol around our area. He was pissed and resolved not to let her escape again if she came back. We would have to double our efforts. As for me, I just wanted to separate from the pack for awhile to get me out of their heads and to keep them out of mine. It irked me that I had to ask Sam for permission to take an alternate route home. He knew my state of mind, though, so he let me go.

It felt good to run on my own. Felt good to have the wind blow through my hair…err…fur. I had to get away from the Sam, Emily, Leah triangle debacle. Well, not a triangle really. There was just Sam and Emily. Leah remained on the outside looking in, sulking and just being generally pissy about the whole thing. Sam couldn't help that he imprinted on Emily. That's how it went with us wolves. Unfortunately, since Leah turned wolf, we all had to be subject to her angst. I had had enough. I had my own shit to deal with; a certain Bella, Jacob, bloodsucker triangle. Only _I_ was the outsider looking in. A sudden horrible thought entered my mind just then making me stop in my tracks. Oh, God. I was the "Leah" in that particular scenario. Ugh!

The sun was setting when I finally reached the reservation and phased back into my human form.

"You okay?" Seth asked me as I neared my house. Seth was a good kid, the youngest wolf so far and was generally well-meaning. It was unfortunate that Leah was his sister.

"I could be better." I answered him as honestly as I could without going into a tirade over Bella.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Maybe later." I told him not really meaning it as I made my way into my house.

Grabbing a piece of fried chicken leg from the fridge and taking a hearty bite, I went in search of my dad to give him the bad news about Victoria getting away in case he hadn't already heard. I finally located him talking on the phone in whispered tones. He did not look very happy; in fact he looked down right disappointed and even a little angry. I watched him from the doorway of the living room surprised he hadn't noticed me or the sound of my feet stomping around the house.

"I wish I could tell you congratulations but…..yeah you know how I feel…thanks for letting me know anyway." Billy put the phone back in its cradle and just seemed to stare into space after that.

"Hey dad, what's wrong?" I asked still chewing on the chicken.

Billy looked up startled. "Son, I didn't see you there." This statement coming from a man who could see the smallest wiggle on a fishing line had me worried.

"Who was on the phone?" I was no genius but it wasn't hard to figure out my father's odd mood was based on whoever was on the other end of that call.

"Did you get that she-devil?" He countered ignoring my question. Okay, Now Billy was being evasive. What the hell?

His question almost threw me off balance but I recovered nicely. "Nah…that was a bust…next time though." I tried to sound confident. "Don't avoid the question, dad. Who were you talking to? I know something's up."

Billy inhaled his breath so deeply; it was almost like all the air was being sucked out of the room. He motioned me over to him with a wave of his hand and patted the seat next to him.

"Sit down, son. I have some news to tell you that you're not going to like."

Uh oh, _this _was not going to be good. Billy usually didn't dole out disclaimers before he spoke; he just said what was on his mind.

"That was Charlie on the phone." He started with a sigh.

Charlie? My head was reeling. Was Bella hurt, was she missing, did _he_ leave her again? All sorts of possibilities ran through my mind.

"Bella and Edward are getting married." All sorts of possibilities except _that_ one.

I heard tinny buzzing in my ears that escalated louder and louder until it was deafening. A red haze swam before my eyes before in turned into a vision of Bella in a wedding dress letting the leech pierce her flesh with his fangs.

"When?" I managed to choke out, feeling the word strangle me. Please let it be years from now, I begged to an unseen force. Even as I pleaded, I knew the uselessness of it. Knowing Bella, I would be lucky if the wedding wasn't the day after she graduated.

"Mid-August, I believe. Charlie wasn't too detailed."

Mid-August…okay, so I still had a few months to come up with something. "I…ah…I gotta go Dad." I told him running for the door, nearly stumbling in my rush to escape Billy's steely but sympathetic gaze. I had to find Sam. I didn't know all the details of the damn treaty but certainly Sam could see where this was headed once they were marri…no, I couldn't even think the word. It's not going to happen.

I didn't even bother knocking on Sam's door, just barged in. I was past caring at this point.

"Jacob, what's wrong?" Sam asked alarmed. I wondered if my eyes looked as wild as I felt.

"I need to talk to you…alone" I told him acknowledging Emily's presence in the room.

"I'll be right back." He told her giving her a kiss. I decided to wait for him outside at that point. I couldn't be a witness to their displays of affection, not when my own love life was in such turmoil.

"Take your time." Emily called out as Sam closed the door behind him.

Sam looked at me with his arms crossed over his chest. He didn't look pleased that I interrupted his domestic bliss. "Would you mind telling me what this is all about?"

"Bella is marrying the bloodsucker." I spit out the offending words.

Sam shrugged. "So?"

_So?_ I thought, _So_? Was he that dense that he couldn't figure this one out on his own?

"She's _mine_" I told him through clenched teeth.

He gave an exasperated sigh and rolled his eyes. "She is not yours. Bella has made her choice."

"It's the wrong choice….Can't you see where this is headed? He is going to turn her…make her a bloodsucking leech just like him…just like they all are"

"If and when that happens we will deal with it…and not one moment before"

"It'll be too late by then!" I shouted. That would mean I would have to kill Bella too. Did I even have the strength or the will to do that? Could I let another from the pack do that? There would be no way to find out. I would stop it before then. I had too.

"Marriage does not break the treaty. You know what does. I have told you before I _will not_ risk any members of my pack for the sake of your misplaced love."

"What if I go to the elders?" I asked him belligerently hoping they would see the logic where Sam obviously could not.

Sam didn't look too concerned. "You could try if you want but you'll get the same answer."

I would try then. There had to be something I could do. "Thanks for nothing." I grumbled walking off.

"Jacob." He called out to me. "When the elders turn you down…You cannot, I repeat _cannot_ go after them yourself nor will you do anything to any of them, including Bella to taunt them into breaking the treaty themselves. That is a direct order."

Damnit! I thought. Trust Sam to pull rank like that and virtually tie my hands. "What if I do?" I stubbornly asked. Seriously, what could they actually do to me?

"We won't back you and you would be excommunicated for such a grievous offense." Sam was blunt and to the point. He would do it, I knew. He was the Alpha and disobeying him, going against such a blatant command would make me no better than a traitor, in the eyes of the pack anyway.

Nodding, I backed away and was off once again. This time I didn't know where I was headed. Could I live with being cut off from everyone and everything that I knew? That was the question I needed to answer before I decided anything.

Bella POV

I should have known they wouldn't leave it alone. It had been two weeks since "the incident in the locker room" and subsequently 2 weeks since Victoria had made a special guest appearance. I had been so happy that they listened to me, for once. Nothing more had been said as wedding planning took precedence over everything…well Alice handled most of that with Esme and Renee often called them for updates and to give her input of course. That happiness faded a bit, however, when I came home one rare sunny day to hear my father grumbling to himself in the kitchen.

"Damn stupid kids".

"What's up Dad?" I asked as I poured myself a glass of soda.

"You know a kid by the name of Jeff Carpenter?" He asked as looked up from the daily paper at me.

What now? I thought. "Uh, yeah. He's new. Why? Did he do something?"

"You could say that." Charlie said somewhat amused. "His parents called in this morning. Apparently he was asleep in his car and woke up screaming."

"Okay." I said drawing the word out. I had never heard of a parent calling the police over their kid's nightmares before. "Overreact much?"

"The car was stuck in a tree." Charlie deadpanned.

The sip I had just taken of my soda came spewing out of my mouth all over Charlie. "Sorry" I mumbled giving him a paper towel and getting one for myself. "Any idea who did it?" I asked innocently. It seemed that revenge truly was a dish best served cold. Edward and his brothers were going to get an earful from me later. This had Cullen written all over it. I could just see Emmett bent over laughing his brains out when Jeff opened his eyes. They would have all been there watching from afar, even if it was a sunny day.

"Nope…no idea how they got the car that high up in the damn tree either. Poor kid was petrified." Charlie slid the afternoon edition of the paper over so I could see the front page. Sure enough, there was Jeff with a terrified expression on his face leaning out the window of his car which was clearly stuck in a tree. "Don't know how this made the front page or who got the picture. Though by the time I got there a large crowd had already formed. Poor Kid."

I tried to keep from laughing at the image of the big tough guy screaming like a baby when he realized his predicament. No wonder he wasn't at school today. By tomorrow, the "poor kid" would be lucky not to have this article complete with embarrassing photo plastered all over his locker, maybe even all over the school. I really should be angry. Edward disregarded my wishes to leave it and him alone. I had to admit to myself that although I wasn't pleased, I wasn't outraged either. Did I really believe Edward could let it be? If I had to be honest with myself, the answer was a resounding "no". I was just surprised he waited this long to act.

"You got some mail today." Charlie said breaking into my thoughts motioning to the counter where he kept all the mail. There was a thick manila envelope under the usual assortment of bills and direct mail offers. The first thing I noticed was the Dartmouth logo and the New Hampshire return address. It was too big, too thick to be a rejection notice. Sonofagun, I thought quickly undoing the metal clasp and taking out the contents.

_Dear Ms. Swan:_

_ It is with pleasure that I inform you of your acceptance into Dartmouth College…_

I scanned the rest of the letter in a state of suspended belief. The only question I had was did I get in on my own merit or did I have a little "assistance"?

"What is it?" Charlie asked coming behind me to read over my shoulder.

"I'm going to Dartmouth." I said turning to face him.

Surprise and elation lit his face. "My baby got accepted to an Ivy League school!" He shouted as he picked me up and swung me around in a move that would have rivaled Emmett. This shocked me more than the acceptance letter did. Charlie never exhibited emotions this way. He had a faraway look, however, when he finally put me down. "But it's on the other side of the country. I'll never see you."

"Of course you will. Edward and I will come back as often as we can." It wasn't really true, though. I most likely would have been changed by that point and given the unpredictability and blood thirstiness of newborns, I couldn't risk seeing Charlie until I was over that hurdle. I wouldn't even be able to attend Dartmouth for the first year at least. It would provide a good cover for leaving Forks.

"Oh, Bells, I know how it is. I was young and in love once too, you know." He said with a grin to give some levity to his words. "Two newlyweds just starting a life together in a new place. Not that I'm complaining and I know your intent is in the right place but to be honest, as much as I'd like for you to visit all the time, realistically, I don't expect it."

Charlie cleared his throat and turned away from me so I wouldn't see the liquid emotion in his eyes. 'Now why don't' you get out of here and tell your fiancée' the good news?"

I smiled. This time he didn't grimace or make a face when saying the word fiancée'. "Sure thing Dad. I love you." I gave him a quick peck on the cheek before I ran for the door.

"You too kiddo, you too."

I drove my truck through the long winding roads to Edward's. I was still trying to master handling the new steering wheel and column that Rosalie installed, complete with an airbag. Apparently, Edward had put her up to it not wanting to take any chances where my safety was concerned.

Taking the acceptance letter with me, I ran into the house and skidded to a halt when I came upon the scene before me. It was obvious I had interrupted an intense discussion that most likely had ceased as soon as they heard my loud engine come up the drive.

Edward turned to stare at me intently. "Bella, I have some bad news."

That phrase, the way he said it brought to mind many horrors but as I looked around the room I saw they were all there, all seemingly hale and healthy. I was just about to let myself feel relief that Victoria had not come back to harm any of them until my eyes focused on Edward again and I looked at him, _really_ looked at him. His mouth was set in a grim line and there was a tightening of the muscles around his eyes but it was the expression in them that stopped me cold. They look so tortured, so pained and in that moment I realized my worst fears were coming true…again. A flashback to a heart-wrenching scene in a forest not so long ago. Broken promises, hurt, pain, abandonment.

Jacob was right _all_ along. They were leaving Forks…leaving _me_. The acceptance letter fell from my hand and I watched it drift slowly to the floor. The hole in my chest that had just about sealed shut was now ripped open, if possible wider than before.

"No." I mouthed unable to create the sound to complete the word wanting to wrap my arms around myself to hold myself together. I didn't even register the perplexed looks on their faces as I did the only thing I could think to do at that moment. I turned…and ran.

XXX

I know…evil cliffhanger. Reviews are always nice (hint, hint)


	28. A Summons Disguised as an Invitation

Edward POV

Too sunny to venture outside, we all had stayed in with the exception of a pre-dawn retaliation excursion that brought me great satisfaction. Since I had been told of the near harassment of Bella by one of our own classmates, no less, I spent much time monitoring the thoughts of Jeff Carpenter. While Mike Newton's thoughts of Bella were annoying and juvenile at best, Jeff Carpenter's mind held a darker nature. He was annoyed that Alice thwarted his efforts and resolved to make another move soon. If possible, I hovered even closer to Bella during the school day, even while she was in her Phys Ed class; I remained close; keeping a watchful eye. If she noticed, she never said anything. No longer satisfied with giving the kid hateful, warning looks which seemed to have little effect, I decided it was time to act. So that is what we did.

Mindful of Bella's request not to "touch" the creep, Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper and I conducted our revenge.

_This has the Cullen Boys written all over it _I heard Esme's mind as she brought in the afternoon edition of the local Forks paper.

"Please tell me my boys are not responsible for this." She said holding up the paper. Her barely suppressed laugh belied the reproach of her words.

None of us had the grace to look sheepish or ashamed. Instead, Emmett let out a loud guffaw which caused a domino reaction of laughter around the room. Esme tried to look un-amused but was failing.

"You promised Bella you wouldn't touch him." She said looking around the room at all of us. _I wouldn't blame her if she got really mad at all of you._

"Technically, no one touched him." I told her as innocently as I could muster.

"Then would you please care to explain this." She said pointing at the picture of the terrified kid stuck in his car, in a tree. I laughed again looking at the picture. Rosalie captured him perfectly in the shot. "I'm waiting." Esme said looking directly at me knowing I was the one ultimately responsible.

"It was quite easy actually." I started. "Rosalie lured him out of the house and into the car using her…uh…err…feminine wiles. Jasper hypnotized him to sleep right before Rosalie very convincingly warned him to stay away from Bella and Emmett and I put the car in the tree. Rosalie snapped the picture when he woke up and sent it to the Forks Forum."

Esme shook her head at all of us. "I don't know whether I should scold you or be proud of you."

"Be proud of us." Rosalie said with a stubborn tilt to her chin. "According to Edward, this kid's thoughts were getting more disturbing by the day."

It was just then that Carlisle walked in the door. Right away I knew something was wrong. His mouth was set in a grim line and he was blocking me from his mind by reciting the various ways of aiding a victim with a venomous snake bite.

"You're home early." Esme said embracing him and giving him a kiss on the cheek. _He looks upset about something. _She thought.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Rosalie asked. We all tensed at Carlisle's unusually edgy demeanor.

Carlisle sighed deeply and removed a FedEx envelope from his briefcase and went to toss it heatedly on the dining room table. Before it made contact with the surface, I snatched it out of the air and examined the envelope. The package was marked "personal and confidential". The postmark was yesterday from Volterra, Italy. My breath hitched and I felt an overwhelming sense of doom impeding on my recently found happiness. Slowly I removed the single sheet of expensive parchment from the encasement. On the top of the page stood the unmistakable seal of the Volturi.

"You might as well read it aloud." Carlisle told me, defeat clear in his tone.

I cleared my throat and began to read trying to keep the alarm from my voice.

"_My Old Friend Carlisle,_

_Please forgive the manner in which this invitation was delivered. However, your presence is requested in Volterra with all due haste. I would suggest that you make arrangements for your travel immediately. Please bring the human girl with you. If you choose not to come, we will have no choice but to visit you. It is my hope that you make the right decision for all concerned._

_Respectfully Yours,_

_Aro"_

I felt the muscle tick in my jaw as my teeth clenched. This was not an invitation as the letter suggested, it was a summons. The fact that they knew about Bella, that they wanted to see her made my insides twist in fear. I looked up at Carlisle sure that the stark fear I felt was evident on my face. They wanted to take her away from me. How could they have found out about Bella?

"Victoria." I spoke hoarsely answered out loud my own question. It was obvious she had found her allies. I couldn't fathom what was worse dealing with the Volturi or Bella's idea of a newborn army. Both were equally terrifying. Fiercely, I turned to Alice. "How could you have not seen this?" I spat. "You were supposed to be watching out for her?" It was unreasonable to blame Alice, I knew but I wasn't feeling rational at the moment. Right now I was only looking for someone to blame. Alice was the easiest target. She took a step back from me, shaking her head. Her eyes wide with horror.

"I'm sorry Edward. I didn't see." Alice cried out. _Why didn't I see?_

"Edward, don't blame Alice. Even if she did know what Victoria was up to there would have been no way for us to stop it." Carlisle said trying to soothe the savage beast that was taking over me.

"We could have had more time to come up with a plan." I told him. He looked at me in defeat. It was useless, I knew. Plan or not, the letter was clear.

"What happens now?" Jasper asked his arm around Alice trying to console her.

"I have no choice. I have to go to Italy." Carlisle said resigned. _I'm sorry Edward_

"NO! You are not taking Bella. It's a death sentence, Carlisle. You are not handing her over to them like some sacrificial lamb for the slaughter. You know I won't let that happen. You can't ask that of me…of _her_" I shouted at him unable to control my fury. An image of them killing her nearly brought me to my knees. I couldn't see past the red haze of anger and tumultuous fear that ensnared my brain. I knew what it was like to lose her…knew the agony of her death. I couldn't live through that again…not even for the mere second it would take for the Volturi soon after once I unleashed my rage on them.

"You think I would do that?" Carlisle asked me. I heard the hurt in his voice and was immediately ashamed that I could think that of him. Of course, he wouldn't do that to Bella whom he loved as a daughter nor would he do that to me.

"No." I said bowing my head in shame.

"So what _do_ we do?" Jasper asked. "If Carlisle shows up alone or not at all, they _will_ come here and the results would be disastrous."

"I agree." Carlisle told him.

"Why don't you ask Bella what she thinks?" Rosalie interrupted.

I scoffed at her. I knew what Bella would do. She would throw herself head first into danger, offering herself up for the sake of me and my family. "You know she would go Rosalie. I bet nothing would please you more. What a convenient way for you to be rid of her."

"That's' not fair Edward." She pouted. "I may not like the decision she is making to become one of us but she is endearing in her own way. I don't want to see her hurt…well not anymore."

"ENOUGH!" Emmett shouted. "This is getting us nowhere. Why don't we all go and kick some Volturi ass."

Now that was an intriguing thought, if not a suicidal one.

"I could take Bella, if she agrees to go, of course." Carlisle started thoughtfully. I shook my head in dismay but he continued. "I could speak with them; make them see that regardless of what rules have been broken that she will be one of us soon." _I am an old friend. I can make them listen to me._

"You think you can reason with them? You think they would consider our side out of some sense of loyalty to you" I was aghast at the suggestion even while I fervently hoped that Carlisle was right. But the Volturi were so self important, high on their own power they, may just laugh Carlisle out of the door.

"It is not out of the realm of possibility." He told me. "Besides we have no other choice."

"What if you go by yourself and explain?" Esme asked. I could tell she wasn't so keen on the idea of serving Bella up to them on the proverbial silver platter.

"They would take it as deliberate defiance to their wishes and would not take it well." Jasper answered.

"If Bella chooses to go," I said swallowing past the lump in my throat. "Nothing will stop me from going as well."

"I never expected anything else. Alice can you see anything, any glimpse of what the future may hold?" Carlisle turned to her with the question.

"No decisions have been made. There is no way I can see." She said regretfully. "If Bella chooses to go, which I have a feeling she will, perhaps I should go with you as well…to even up the playing field."

"No!" Jasper said taking a protective stance in front of Alice. "You will not go. Aro would like nothing more than to keep you as part of his menagerie and would use any leverage he can get to do it."

"Jasper's right, Alice." Carlisle sighed. "It was good of you to offer but I won't have you placing yourself in danger as well. "

To have Alice there with us would have been perfect. She would be able to guide me in her mind of future outcomes. We would be going in blind now, if we went in at all. However, I did not blame Jasper for wanting to keep Alice safe. I knew exactly how he felt.

We deliberated for what seemed like hours, going over possibilities and could find none other than to do what Aro requested.

""I won't ask her." I sobbed brokenly when I regretfully realized there was no other alternative.

"I'll do it Edward." Carlisle told me. _I know it will be too hard for you to do._

I prayed to what whatever higher being there was that she would say "no".

We were all sitting in bleak silence when I heard the rumblings of Bella's '57 Chevy laboring up the drive. There was nothing I wanted to do more than hold her in my arms and never let her go but my body was frozen as I watched her run into the house and come to a dead halt as she saw our faces.

"Bella, I have some bad news." I told her grimly.

She looked at all of us bewildered then suddenly her face changed from confusion to absolute fear as tears welled in her eyes.

"No." She mouthed as the piece of paper she was holding in her hand dropped to the floor. And then she ran.

Shocked out of my immobile state, I ran after her and caught her from behind as she was just about to stumble face forward down the stairs.

"Let me go!" She shouted as she struggled, trying to shake my hold, kicking her legs.

I didn't understand. Why was she trying to get away from me? Her reaction to my words wasn't normal, completely irrational and it scared me.

"Bella." I tried to soothe her. "Bella, stop. Why are you doing this?"

She stopped her struggle and when I felt she wasn't going to try to run, I let her down safely my hands never leaving her. She turned to face me with an expression of such pain in her eyes it hurt just to look at her.

"You couldn't do this alone like last time? You have to let your whole family witness my complete humiliation?"

Her words made no sense to me. Like last time? What was she talking about?

"Bella, I don't understand what you're saying. Please tell me what's going on in that beautiful head of yours." I pleaded with her my hands still holding her in place.

"Don't pretend you don't know what I am talking about. You're leaving aren't you? Leaving Forks…leaving me."

My God! Is that what she thought? My poor, sweet Bella. How it must have looked to her when she came in the house. No wonder she reacted as she did. It hurt me however that she still had so little trust in me, in my promises, that our leaving would be the first conclusion that she made. I had only myself to blame for that. I was distraught, I wasn't thinking straight when the words came out of my mouth. I should have realized what she would think.

I nearly crushed her in my embrace then, holding her in my arms, feeling her sweet floral scent envelope me. "We're not leaving." I tried to instill as much conviction in that statement as I could.

"You're not?" She questioned still sounding unsure.

I pulled back just a little so she could see the truth in my eyes. I silently begged her to believe me "No. We're not. I am so, so sorry you thought that."

"Then what…? I don't understand." She looked at me confused.

"Why don't you come inside and I'll explain."

Bella POV

He is not leaving me, he is not leaving me I repeated in my head like a mantra trying to calm my erratic breathing as we walked back into the house to face the concerned looks of Edward's family. His hands never left me since he caught up to me moments before and for that I was grateful.

"Are you alright, Bella?" Esme asked me in her soothingly maternal voice as soon as we entered.

"Yeah. Momentary lapse of reason." I explained with a derisive smile. I was too embarrassed by my little display of dramatics to launch into the actual reason I left so abruptly. "So what's going on?" I asked to take the attention off of me and focusing it back to where it belonged. Whatever was going on in my absence was serious. Serious enough to scare the hell out of a group of vampires.

"You know who the Volturi are?" Carlisle asked me.

Fragments of conversations with Edward came back to me along with the memory of a near flight to Italy with Alice on a life saving mission. Fear came with the name. I nodded.

"I received this from them today." Carlisle handed me a letter typed on expensive paper. I silently read it's contents with apprehension. I was brought up short by the line "_Please bring the human girl with you."._ It was if they considered me an inanimate object, a package to be delivered. I thought of the implications of this letter, knew that that had somehow found out I was human, Victoria no doubt. I understood the danger it presented to my soon to be family and realized what I had to do…for them. I could not let them see my fear even though Jasper could probably sense it's magnitude. It would be counterproductive to let on the dread I felt at the prospect of facing this group of vampires that could very well destroy me. The choice was easy, though. If I had to give my life to ensure theirs, I would. There was no question, no deliberation on my part though I could only imagine that Edward would fight me tooth and nail on it as he had probably already been fighting with his family on it already. I, however, was resolved.

"When do we leave?" I asked Carlisle, no hesitation in my voice.

I heard Edward suck in a breath as his hand tightened on my arm. "No, Bella. Think about this first." Edward urged.

I cupped his cheek with my hand trying to convey with my eyes the sincerity in what I was saying. "Edward, if I don't go, you will all die. It isn't stated but the implication is clear."

"We could find another way." He said but one look at Carlisle's somber expression told me there was no other way.

"Carlisle believes he can use his friendship to dissuade them from their purpose." Jasper explained.

I remembered that Carlisle had lived with them, for maybe a decade. Surely that had to count for something. "That's good then isn't it? All hope is not lost."

"The Volturi expect strict compliance to the laws. Anything else is not tolerated." Edward said mostly to Jasper.

"But surely they will see that you have plans to change me." I said desperately trying to cling to any silver lining I could find.

Carlisle nodded. "That is what we are hoping. Aro can read every thought any one has ever head by a mere touch of the hand. If he touches us he will surely see our intent and perhaps give us some leeway. But Bella, I realize we are asking a lot of you and we have no guarantees of what will happen. You do have a choice Bella. If you do not want to go, then we will do as Edward said and find another way."

But Carlisle wasn't fooling me. I knew there wasn't another way. If there was, they would not be presenting me with this choice; they would have acted already without even letting me know what was happening.

"I'll have to think of an excuse to Charlie why I'm gone for a few days." I didn't want to consider the alternative that I would not be coming back.

"Oh that's easy." Alice chimed in acting like the situation wasn't as serious as it actually was. Perhaps she had seen some vision of the future, some glimpse that let her know what it would all be okay. "You are coming away with us girls to Seattle for the weekend to meet with possible wedding vendors."

"This goes against everything in me by allowing you to do this." Edward said raking his fingers through his hair in a tortured but resigned tone. I knew it did but I was glad he gave me the choice to decide on my own rather than bulldoze over any decisions I made. My safety was foremost in his mind and I knew it must be killing him inside to have me face something that he had no control over. I was also aware in the back of my mind that if I didn't come back, if the worst happened, he wouldn't be returning either.

"I'll send word to Aro and make the arrangements. We'll leave Friday afternoon and come back on Sunday." Carlisle said. His voice instilled confidence that we would all be coming back. "Thank you Bella." He said giving me a comforting hug.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Rosalie pick up the sheet of paper I had initially dropped when I first entered the house. With one eyebrow raised, she looked at me.

"Dartmouth, huh?"

In the scope of all that was happening, my acceptance into the prestigious college was anticlimactic. Apparently, the Cullens didn't think so as they one by one congratulated me.

"Looks like all that time at the dining room table paid off." Emmett said with a grin, an obvious attempt to throw levity on the situation. I blushed at the memory of Edward and I caught in an awkward but very passionate situation not 5 feet from where I stood now.

But now was not the time for such musings. Edward, Carlisle and I were going to Italy and God help me, we would be coming back.


	29. Volterra

Bella POV

Alice picked me up that Friday to take me over to her house before heading out to Sea-Tac Airport in Seattle. Giving the excuse to where I would be for the weekend to Charlie had been easier than expected. He was already resigned to the fact that Edward and I were getting married and never asked too much about the planning process. As long as he was told what to wear, what to do and where to stand, he was a happy man.

For me, I wished the only thing I had to worry about was wedding planning and not having to face the Vampire equivalency to judge, jury and executioner.

"Really, Alice? Fendi?" I asked as she proudly showed me the luggage she purchased for me that would be small enough to fit in the overhead compartment of the airplane so I wouldn't have to check any bags.

Alice seemed proud that I knew the designer label and I tried not to be insulted. I didn't grow up in hicks town USA, after all even though the only thing that alerted me to the fact that it was Fendi were the block letter "F"'s all over the brown bag.

"Well you are going to Italy. It's only fitting that you have an Italian bag."

"Because American Tourister would have been way too…err…American?" I said teasing her.

"Exactly!" She beamed. "And you don't have to worry, the clothes inside are all Edward proofed."

After Alice's last attempt to dress me, I wouldn't have been surprised if Edward handpicked each item himself. Though I didn't understand why my own wardrobe wouldn't suffice for the brief time we were going to spend in Italy. And no matter what the outcome was, I did know my stay there would be brief.

Alice was trying to alleviate my fears in her own small way but I just couldn't bring myself to stop and think of what was to come. As if sensing my unease she placed a gentle hand on my arm.

"Bella, I want you to know that despite this worrisome setback, my visions of you and Edward's futures together remain strong."

This caught me off guard considering that up until two days ago she couldn't see any clear visions at all. "You've seen something?" I asked her with hope clear in my voice.

She shook her head sadly and scrunched her face in a show of annoyance. "I still haven't been able to see _exactly _what's going to happen in Volterra but I can see past it. So try not to stress out too much."

Easy for her to say, I thought. My burst of hope fizzled and died.

As Carlisle, Edward and I boarded the first class portion of the plane in uneasy silence, I experienced a strange sense of déjà vu. After all, hadn't I done this very same thing with Alice only a few short months ago?

During the flight I alternated between drinking soda and drinking coffee, anything that had caffeine, feeling the need to stay awake by any means necessary, unwilling to succumb to the dreams that would invade my mind as soon as I closed my eyes.

Edward was a constant next to me. The whole way to JFK where we would catch the next leg of our flight, he held me, touched me, and kissed me, never for one second let me go unless I had to leave for a "human moment" after drinking so much. He tried to get me to eat but I couldn't. The thought of ingesting anything other than caffeine made bile rise to my throat.

"Please Bella, you need to eat something. I don't think you ate since lunch at school and that wasn't all that much." Edward asked me pleadingly. Under normal circumstances, I could refuse him nothing. But these weren't normal circumstances. How could I tell him that even the thought of eating something made my stomach revolt in denial?

"I'm really not that hungry." I told him.

Carlisle leaned over to look at me from the other side of the aisle. "Bella, I know you must be feeling very nervous right now and understandably so but I think Edward is right. The last thing we want to see happen is you fainting from hunger. It will not help our cause. I'll see if I can get you some toast with Jam. Is that acceptable to you?"

Sighing, I realized Carlisle was right. It would not do to show any weakness in front of the Volturi. I would need all my wits about me. I nodded in acquiescence.

"Excellent." Carlisle smiled and waved the flight attendant over.

Some of the tension left Edward's body as well. "Thank you." He said smoothing my hair and tucked an errant strand behind my ear.

I did feel better after I got something in my stomach and before I knew it we were boarding Lufthansa for the final leg of our trip. Next stop: Galileo Galilei Airport Pisa Italy

The first class cabin on the jet was designed specifically for the overnight traveler who wanted all the comforts of home; complete with semi-private beds and individual TV sets. Edward and I laid back on the bed after he closed the fabric partition blocking us off from anyone's view. The TV was on a low volume but I really wasn't paying attention to it. Instead I rested my head on Edward's chest and curled my body into him as he caressed my back in a circular motion.

"Are you scared?' I asked him, my voice sounding small to my ears. He didn't answer at first but kissed my forehead instead.

"No." He finally answered.

"Why not?" I asked him getting up to a semi sitting position so I could look at him.

He shrugged. "Because Bella, no matter what happens. We _will _be together. That is all that matters in the end anyway."

"Well that doesn't exactly make me confident. If you're thinking that this won't turn out well, why didn't you just change me when the Volturi summoned us? It would have saved us from all of this."

"Because I won't have this life forced on you when you're not ready." He said raking his hand through his hair. " Besides your sudden disappearance would raise too many questions; questions that could potentially expose us. Carlisle is going to explain that to Aro."

"Do you think that Carlisle will be able to reason with him?"

"Bella, if I for one second thought there was no hope, there is no way I would expose you to this…to _them_. I have faith in Carlisle as well as Alice's visions of our future…I have to. But what I said previously…we will be together no matter what."

"Edward Cullen, I hope you don't' mean what I think you mean." My eyes narrowed at him. "Carlisle wouldn't let you do that."

"Carlisle wouldn't be able to stop me" He said determinedly then sighed. "Just relax Bella and try to get some rest. We have a long day tomorrow."

I didn't say anything else after that not wanting to argue with him but I made a mental note to myself to have a chat with Carlisle about it. Turning my head toward the window as he spooned me, I retreated into my own mind. Before I knew it and despite all the caffeine I had, Edward was kissing me awake to get ready for the plane's descent into the airport.

While Carlisle and Edward went about the business of procuring a rental car, I took a much needed human moment to go to the bathroom, change, brush my teeth and run a brush through my tangled hair. When I was satisfied I looked presentable, I went to meet them outside. I noted, Edward's face was tense as he spoke to Carlisle although I couldn't hear what he was saying yet. Sensing my presence, he turned to me, his face softening as he took me into his embrace.

"We have agreed that Carlisle will do most of the talking." He told me. "I want you to say as little as possible. The less attention you call to yourself the better." That was fine by me and I hope my natural inquisitiveness would not rear it's ugly head.

"I intend to play this like a chess game." Carlisle informed us. "I know their weaknesses and their strengths after spending so much time with them and I intend to use those against him."

As vague as that was, at least he had a plan.

I spent much of the ride gazing out the window at the Italian countryside; its colors vivid with rich hues of green and brown, watching it go by in blur. None of us spoke much on the way and as we seemed to get closer to the city, Carlisle's pace slowed down.

The city itself was remarkable, the architecture ornate and centuries old. Carlisle parked us in an inconspicuous place where we could walk shrouded in shadow to our destination.

"The Palazzo Vito." Carlisle remarked pointing to a large castle like structure. "This is where the Volturi reside…though much of their domain lies in the underground portion. It is not open to the public with the exception of feeding days." He pointed out sounding almost like a tour guide.

Edward gave my hand a reassuring squeeze as we walked through the darkened underpass to the side of the building where we would gain entry. We were met soon after we entered by two male vampires.

"Demetri and Felix" Edward whispered in my ear. The one known as Felixwas tall and powerful and quite frightening. Edward took a protective stance in front me and emitted a low growl when it became apparent that Felix was eyeing me up and down; not as a meal but more as something else. My stomach did a flip-flop and all I wanted to do was run out of there, My flight or fight instincts were screaming for flight. Demetri was of slighter build but still tall enough to be intimidating.

"Aro is expecting you." Demetri said calmly. "Come, we will escort you to the lower levels."

I sensed some silent communication going on between Edward and Carlisle as we made our way through the corridors laden with fresco art works and alabaster statues. If we weren't under these circumstances, I may have admired the beauty of it all.

As we entered another darkened passageway, I felt Edward stiffen beside me as a small blonde haired figure came into view.

"Hello Jane" Both Carlisle and Edward greeted her. I was at a loss. Though her eyes glowed red, she was barely taller than I was and I silently wondered why Edward seemed so daunted by her.

"I was sent to see what was taking you so long." She sneered, casting an accusing glance at the other two vampires that came to greet us.

"They have only just arrived." Felix explained.

"Be that as it may, Aro doesn't like to be kept waiting." That snide comment was meant for us, I was sure.

We descended a steep, damp and dark stone staircase. Edward kept a firm guiding grip on me, helping me to navigate the stairs. The last thing I wanted was my clumsiness to get the better of me and fall. My luck the staircase would be the end of me before I even got to see the Volturi.

When we got to the bottom, the temperature must have dropped 20 degrees and I couldn't suppress the shivers that wracked my body. Edward, thinking the shivers were from fear (and admittedly some of them were) rubbed small circles on my back in an effort of reassurance.

Although the light was dim at best I observed my surroundings. Massive 30 foot double doors loomed ahead. On the left of those doors stood what could only be described as a receptionist's desk. How odd. Odder still was the girl that sat behind it with a bright smile on her face. She was actually tan with brown eyes; not red like the others, not butterscotch like Edward and Carlisle but brown. She was like me; she was human.

"Is she…?" I whispered to Edward.

"Yes."

"Does she know?" Although, how could she not?

"Yes."

"Then…why?...Oh ." I said in quick understanding. She wants to be.

"Yes."

And I thought, how hypocritical. The Volturi wanted to kill me for knowing about the existence of vampires and yet here they employed a human that knew probably even more than I did.

Almost as if he could sense my thoughts, I saw Edwards calculated smile. "Leverage." He mouthed not daring to make a sound.

As we entered the large chamber I experienced what Dorothy must have felt like when she finally gained entry to see the Great Wizard of Oz, only there was no kindly old man behind a curtain maneuvering controls. I suppressed the giggle that came to my throat as I pictured Edward as the Scarecrow and Carlisle as the Tin Man. No Bella, you are definitely not in Forks anymore.

The room was large complete with high ceilings, marble floors, stained glass windows and beautifully painted murals. Straight ahead sitting on what looked like thrones on raised platform were three figures dressed in black. There were others milling about, staring at us but it was these three that my attentions were focused on. Briefly I glanced over at Victoria who stood to the side with a smug smile on her face. Of course she would be here. Nothing would give her greater pleasure than to see me die with the exception that it was done by her own hand.

"Aro is in the middle" Edward leaned down to whisper to me. "Marcus is to the left and Caius to the right."

I saw the one called Marcus lean towards Aro and say something to him. I knew Edward could hear so I looked to him for an explanation. Edward's face held a one-sided smile "Marcus is telling Aro to tread carefully. That he has never seen a bond as strong as ours between two vampires let alone a vampire and a human." For some reason that made me feel better.

Aro stood up and walked towards us, his hands outstretched in greeting. "Carlisle, my friend. It has been too long."

"Yes it has Aro."

"You are looking well despite your rather…unconventional diet. I see you have brought your son, Edward and is that Isabella? I am so glad you decided to bring her after all. I had feared you would change your mind."

"You left no room for choice." Carlisle said with an edge to his usually calm voice.

"There is _that_ I suppose."

Edward stood rigid beside me. I wondered if he was getting as frustrated with the insincere pleasantries as I was.

"Will you get on with it Aro. We do not have all day." Caius voiced from his seat, clearly impatient.

"Victoria has told us that you have allowed a human in your midst. At first I did not believe her. I thought Carlisle would never do such a thing but here she stands before us…a human…a knowledgeable one." He said peering at me with unblinking red eyes.

Edward moved swiftly to stand in front of me in a protective gesture.

"She is Edward's mate." Carlisle explained. "We have intentions of changing her to one of us. You have only to touch me to know it is the truth."

"But why wait? Why has it not already been done? You have risked much."

"My son" I heard Carlisle emphasize the word "son" warning Aro of his relationship to Edward. "is very much a man of his time and wanted to wait until Bella and he are bonded by the sanctity of marriage before turning her. She is still attending high school." At Aro's amused expression he continued. "Her father is also the chief of police and we thought it prudent to wait until such a union took place. After all, her sudden death or disappearance would raise many questions…questions that would be wise to leave unanswered."

Aro nodded once, conceding the point. "Point taken. And when is this "blessed" event to take place?"

"Mid August." Carlisle answered him. Aro moved quickly to stand in front of Carlisle and took his hand in his. After a brief moment, he let him go. "You do not lie." He said surprised then took Edward's hand as if he needed more proof.

"La Tua Cantante." He said. "Her blood calls to you so much. Just thinking about it makes me…thirsty." Edward hissed pulling his hand back from Aro's grip. "How do you stand it, being so close?"

"It is not without effort." Edward informed him through clenched teeth.

The whole exchange was making me very nervous. Were the Volturi convinced of our intentions? I somehow did not think so. Aro was playing with us if the wicked gleam in his crimson eyes were any indication.

"I can see that. Tell me, you had thought her dead once and you were planning to come here to us to end your existence…would you ask the same of us now if I were to decide to not let your human mate live?"

Edward didn't hesitate. "You know that would be the case."

"Mmm yes, your thoughts were quite clear about that. Still…" he shrugged "It doesn't hurt to ask. It would be a waste to lose abilities like yours. I do find it interesting however that as powerful a mind reader as you are, you are unable to read _he_r thoughts. Shall we see who is the stronger mind reader?"

What? He was going to compete with Edward now over whose gift was stronger and my mind was the playing field? What if Aro _could_ read my mind? I saw Edward give Carlisle a terrified look. Carlisle nodded his head in reassurance.

"May I?" Aro asked politely holding his hand out to me motioning for me to take it.

"It's okay Bella." Edward told me. I slowly extended my hand. Aro grasped it quickly. I fought the urge to pull it from his grasp. His touch did not feel anything like Edward's or Carlisle's. No. Aro's skin was papery and cold. It was like holding hands with a lizard.

After a moment of heavy concentration, Aro looked directly at me. He didn't look happy. In fact he looked down right angry.

"Intriguing. I see nothing." I caught Edward's satisfied smirk in my peripheral vision. "I wonder then if Isabella here is immune to all of our gifts…Jane dear." He motioned to the small blonde girl who up until that point stood by and watched the exchange with barely disguised boredom.

"Yes master." The little girlish voice said.

"Go ahead."

At these words, Edward acted. He shoved me behind him so quickly I lost my breath. Carlisle caught me just as Edward crouched ready to launch at Jane. As he was about to attack, I heard her utter one word with a smile on her face as she stared at Edward.

"Pain"

Edward's feet rose a good foot off the ground, his face was contorted in agony. I struggled in Carlisle's grip.

"Stop her!" I screamed. "Can't you see she's hurting him?"

"It's okay Bella. It's just a mind trick. Edward will be fine." Carlisle tried to soothe me but even I could tell he was nervous.

How could he say that? Edward was clearly _not_ fine. He was being tortured, writhing from intolerable pain. But no matter how much I struggled, Carlisle's grip was stead fast. I stopped trying to fight Carlisle then.

"I'm okay. I'm okay" I told him. I hated to lie to Carlisle but it may be the only way that he would release me. He hesitated but removed his arms. As soon as he let me go, I ran in front of Edward.

"STOP!" I yelled at her. Edward dropped to the floor, Jane's invisible torture of him stopped as she turned her eyes to me. She could do anything to me as long as she stopped hurting him.

"Bella…don't" I heard Edward plead from his position on the floor behind me but I paid no attention as I looked at Jane.

She could have been shooting daggers at me with the evil glare in her eyes but surprisingly I felt nothing. Not one damn thing

"Amazing!" I heard Aro clap his hands and laugh. "Don't be too upset Jane. She confounds us all."

As soon as Edward picked himself off the floor with Carlisle's help, he had me in his arms holding me tightly. "You risk too much. She could have killed you." He whispered fervently in my ear. Didn't he realize I would risk anything…even death itself for him?

"And she tried to protect you as well. A human…so ready to sacrifice herself for one of us…a soulless creature."

"You know nothing about his soul." I told Aro though gritted teeth. Silence be damned. I was not going out without a fight.

"Such a waste." He made a tsking sound. "I wish could be sure of the future. Things can change in few months time." Aro said contemplatively.

If possible, Edward's hold on me got tighter and I knew Aro had come to his decision. And it didn't bode well for me.

"May I remind you that you employ a human that knows the truth as well?" Carlisle said. "It would be very hypocritical for you to destroy Bella when you have disregarded your own rules so blatantly."

"Gianna is of no significance." Aro gave a dismissive wave of his hand.

"He is right Aro. Surely you must see the consequences if we do not let them go." Marcus spoke up. Aro seemed to consider this and sighed.

"Checkmate." Edward whispered so that only I could hear.

Aro looked at the three of us and gave a false smile. He had a calculating gleam in his eyes that I did not like. "You are both right. But I trust that she will be changed before the summer is over."

"You have my word." Carlisle told him sincerely.

Aro walked right up to me and despite Edward's protective embrace, he held my chin in his cold hands. "I will be quite interested to see how you turn out…Isabella." He said my name like an eerie caress.

"NO!" Victoria screeched. She had remained silent throughout the whole encounter; I almost forgot she was there. "You can't let her go! A mate for a mate. He killed my James."

"Silence!" Aro shouted at her. "He wouldn't have killed your James if he did not attack Edward's mate first. Did you think I wouldn't see that?"

He turned back to us. "Go now. Have a safe journey back home. I hope when we see each other again it will be under more pleasant circumstances."

"We will be checking up on you" Caius said. "The Volturi do not give second chances."

"What of Victoria?" Edward asked of them.

"She will be our guest for a while. You need not worry about any interference from her. Not yet...anyway. I can't give you any reassurances when the end of the summer comes however."

"Thank you for your consideration." Carlisle bowed to him and signaled for us to say our farewells and leave in all due haste.

"Arividerchi" Gianna said with a smile and we hurried towards the stairwell. It was then that I noticed a group of tourists heading toward the chamber we just barely escaped from.

"Feeding day." Edward explained. "Don't turn around Bella, just move quickly."

These poor people were being herded to their deaths and they didn't even know it. I felt sick to my stomach. There was nothing I could do to stop it. As we made our way back up the staircase, I had to hold my ears to keep myself from hearing the screams that started. They reverberated through me like tortured echoes. My legs no longer wanted to hold me.

Edward saw I was on the verge of collapse and he picked me up bridal style, carrying me the rest of the way all the while whispering soothing words that made no sense.

When we reached the outside, Edward sat me down against the building telling me to put my head between my knees until the dizziness passed.

"I'm going to be sick." I warned them before turning my head to the side. Edward held my hair back as I lost whatever was left in my stomach. The bile burned my throat and I couldn't control my shaking body.

"Will she be alright Carlisle?" Edward asked him concerned.

"She'll be fine." He said. "Her body is just responding to stress overload and fatigue."

"I'm so sorry" I said to the both of them wiping my mouth on the handkerchief Carlisle handed to me. "I hope you are not disappointed in me." I felt the tears roll down my face. All I could think about were those poor people and how happy I was that I wasn't them.

"Disappointed?" Carlisle asked kneeling down next to me. "Bella. I am so proud of you, you have no idea. You were very courageous in there."

"I don't' feel very courageous." I felt weak and vulnerable. I felt human.

Edward rocked me in his arms as he wiped the tears off my face with his thumb. "Bella, love, you truly do not see yourself very clearly."

Carlisle glanced behind him. "Come, it would not do for us to linger here too much longer."

I glanced in the direction that Carlisle had looked and saw just a pair if bright red eyes glaring at us from the darkened passageway. I stumbled quickly to my feet and we headed towards the rental car. We were going home.


	30. There's No Place Like Home

Edward POV

Carlisle was right. Bella had been very courageous, more so than I had been. The pain Jane had subjected me to was nothing in comparison to the panic that overwhelmed me when Carlisle had let Bella go and she jumped in between us to protect me. To my utter amazement, it had worked. But the thought kept niggling me was, what if it hadn't? Would Bella have been able to survive Jane's attack if she hadn't been immune to her powers? Of course, knowing Bella, the idea that she could be seriously harmed if not even killed never occurred to her at all. Her only mindset was my protection not her own.

_I am never going to let her go again_, I thought as I tightened my hold on Bella in the back seat of the rental car as we made our way back to the airport. Even though we were on our way home, I couldn't help but feel that the gloom that hung over my head while inside the walls of the Volturi compound followed me through the scenic roads of the Tuscan countryside. I half expected one of the Volturi guard to whisper in my ear, "just kidding" and try to snatch Bella from my embrace. It made me want to hold Bella even closer…tighter until not even air could separate us.

"Are we being followed?" Bella asked nervously as she glanced up at me.

"No" I told her. We weren't but I could not bring myself to relax until we were in the air on our way back to Forks.

"Then why do you keep looking out the back windshield?"

How could I forget how perceptive Bella is? Mistakenly, I thought I was being subtle. Trust Bella to pick up on my unease "Just being cautious." I replied kissing the top of her head to reassure her.

"You know how Edward is when it comes to you, Bella" Carlisle said. _Really, Edward. Stop making her nervous. They made their decision. We're fine._

For now, I pondered. My eyes met Carlisle's through the rearview mirror and I gave an almost imperceptible shake of my head, only noticeable to Carlisle. His eyes widened slightly in turn. _"Is there something I am not aware off?" _ He asked silently in his mind.

I couldn't answer him, not then, not with Bella right here. She snuggled further in my lap watching the scenery go by.

We made it to the airport without incident managing to secure three first class tickets on the next plane out to the states. With an hour until boarding, Carlisle excused himself to call home and inform everyone of the good news that we all had made it out alive. Bella and I browsed through some of the airport shops to waste some time.

I ended up purchasing her a light blue hoodie with the word "Italy" printed on the upper left side in the colors of their flag.

"For the plane. In case you get cold." I told Bella responding to her questioning look. Maybe it was silly of me to pick up the souvenir. For all intents and purposes, our trip had been far from a pleasurable one and maybe she wouldn't want any trinket associated with coming here but it could also serve as a reminder that we survived…and would do it again if need be.

"You know, I've never been further east than Albuquerque…well except for an hour in O'Hare airport." She mused tracing the letters on the sweatshirt with her fingertips.

"We'll come back, I promise. After we're wed." _and you have been changed_, I thought silently.

"I'd love that though if it's all the same to you, I'd rather skip over Volterra." She said looking up at me with a half smirk on her beautiful lips.

"You have my word, love. No Volterra. Perhaps we'll go to Rome or Florence." I told her as we walked back to the waiting area where I spotted Carlisle perusing through an Italian newspaper.

"Haven't you already been there?" she frowned. "That would be boring for you, wouldn't it? Why not go someplace you haven't seen?"

"Because, you silly girl don't you realize that there is nothing I wouldn't give you." I said leaning down to kiss her temple. "And besides, to see those places through your eyes, it _would_ be like seeing it for the first time."

I was graced with one of her famous blushes. It appeased me slightly to see some color back on her too pale cheeks. Carlisle spotted us approaching and moved his luggage out of the way so Bella could sit down.

"I spoke with Esme and assured her all was well." He said to us. _ Bella looks quite fatigued Edward. We need to make sure she sleeps on the plane. I fear for her health if she continues on this way. _

I nodded in agreement. It hadn't escaped my notice that she had developed purplish smudges under her eyes due to stress and fatigue. "Are you hungry, Bella? Should we get you something to eat before we board?" I asked her.

"I'm not really that hungry." She mumbled. Her stomach growled, however belying the words she just spoke.

"Hmm. Wait here." I said and walked off to one of the kiosks that served food. When I came back, I handed her a cheeseburger and fries.

"Really Edward, I don't think I can eat this right now." She insisted.

"Your stomach says differently…Please, for me." I attempted to use my "dazzling" skills on her as Bella had so often called them. She clued into what I was doing immediately.

"You're trying to dazzle me aren't you?" she sighed not too happily Bella but she ate it anyway. "Satisfied?" She asked with a derisive smirk when she was finished.

I only gave her a knowing smile as an answer. My next "battle" was to try to get her to sleep on the flight.

"How about a glass of wine? It will help you relax" _and hopefully fall asleep. _I asked Bella after the plane finally took off.

"They won't serve me. I'm only 18." She whispered.

I couldn't help but chuckle at her admonishing expression. "Bella, we're still in Italy. Technically there is no drinking age."

"Oh." She shrugged, "Well in that case why not?"

Before she even finished the glass of merlot I ordered for her, she was sleeping soundly, her head resting on my shoulder. Carefully, I placed the pillow provided by the airline under her head and moved her gently so she was reclining in her own seat. I had to talk to Carlisle, to make him aware of what I knew and what it could possibly mean for mine and Bella's future.

Making sure that Bella was resting comfortable if not peacefully, I crossed over the aisle to sit in the empty seat next to Carlisle.

"Son, I can sense your unease. What is it?" He asked in hushed tones so only I could hear him. I turned to look at Bella again noticing the slight frown on her face. Even in her sleep, she noticed my absence. I looked back at my father.

"He wants her Carlisle. More than he wants me, maybe more than Alice." I whispered harshly barely able to contain the sudden fury that threatened to overwhelm me.

"Who? What are you talking about Edward?"

"Bella. Aro didn't let her live because we knew of Gianna and he didn't do it out of some sense of loyalty to you. No. He wants Bella to join his little menagerie." I spat out.

"Why would he want Bella?"

_Why wouldn't anyone want Bella_, I thought. It seemed all I was doing lately was trying to fight off Bella's pursuers and admirers. Oh, how Bella would laugh if I told her that but it was nothing more than the truth. "I saw in his mind, Carlisle. He is fascinated that Bella is immune to him as well as me and Jane and Bella is still human. He is practically licking his lips imagining what she will be like…what kind of immense power she will have once she is a vampire if she is this strong now."

"If that's true and I'm not saying it isn't, then why let us leave?" Carlisle asked genuinely curious.

"Because he cannot know what type of power she will have, if one at all once she is turned. He is only guessing and Marcus warned him of the tremendous bond we have. He didn't want to risk an all out war at this time without being positive." And it would be an all out war. There is no way I would ever let them or anyone take Bella from me.

"Hmm, that is a concern though I am not surprised. Aro has always liked to collect anomalies. It makes him feel more powerful."

I agreed. "Yes and with Bella becoming a part of our family in every true sense of the word, he is worried that with me, Alice, Jasper and her, that we will be the stronger coven. He will feel threatened." There is no way Aro would let another coven exist that was more powerful than his was. He would lie in wait and then he would strike. It was not without risk for him however, not unless he wanted to have the whole vampire community against him. He would need something that he could hold against us to make his actions justifiable.

"What are you thinking to do?"

"There are ways to stay ahead of the Volturi." I told him thinking of Alice. "But, if it comes down to where the family may be harmed, Bella and I will leave."

"No." Carlisle stated ardently. "We are a family Edward. We love each other and we will fight for each other. Everyone would agree with me on that."

He was right but I couldn't respond. There was no way I would put my family at risk. I could only pray that it wouldn't come down to that. I couldn't foresee any circumstance that would give Aro the cause to act but it wouldn't be unlike him to manipulate things to his own end. If it did come down to it Bella and I _would _leave and intuitively I knew I would have her blessing on that.

"Bella is starting to stir." Carlisle said nodding over to where Bella lay. "I think she may be having a nightmare."

Immediately, I went to Bella and cradled her in my arms, rubbing circles on her back in an attempt to calm her.

"Screaming…stop the screaming." She whimpered and my heart broke for her. Having to be a near witness to the execution of all those tourists as we made our escape was playing out, no doubt in vivid clarity, in Bella's nightmares.

"Shh, Bella." I whispered soothingly in her ear. "I'm here."

"Mmm, Edward" She murmured and snuggled closer into my chest. Once again, I was awed that this beautiful, courageous girl was mine and always would be. I knew to the depths of my existence that there would be no Edward without Bella and even more heartbreakingly so, no Bella without Edward. Those were waters we already tested.

It was mid afternoon when we finally landed in Seattle after our first stopover in New York. Bella had remained awake the entire time on the second leg of the trip. Her eyes did not look as tired but I knew the jet lag would eventually creep up on her. I was hoping to convince her to stay home from school tomorrow. There were only a few weeks left until finals and then graduation. Since Bella had already been accepted to Dartmouth, it wasn't like she would be missing out on anything important.

Alice POV

Being vertically challenged (because I really hate the word short) was inconvenient at times like this one as I tried to glimpse through the sea of people in the terminal for any sign of Bella, Edward and Carlisle. The whole family drove to the airport to greet them upon their arrival. With an exasperated sigh, I stood up on one of the chairs by the arrival gate.

"Too short to see, huh?" Emmett grinned evilly at me when he noticed me standing on the chair.

"Shut up Emmett." I glowered at him. He could be such a jerk sometimes. Why didn't I wear my heels today?

"Look, there they are." Rosalie said and I looked to the direction she was pointing.

I gave them the once over to make sure they all managed to comeback unscathed. I didn't have a doubt about Carlisle or Edward but with Bella, one never knows. Where were the triumphant looks? Weren't they supposed to be happier than this now that they had faced the Volturi and won? Only Bella looked relieved…well relieved and tired.

Edward had his arm around her shoulders guiding her towards us. Esme ran up to Carlisle and enveloped him in a hug, her eyes conveying what mere words could not; that she missed him desperately. It was an intimate moment in one of the most public of places. I looked away to honor whatever privacy they could maintain.

The rest of us went over to Edward and Bella. I went to embrace her but Edward wasn't letting her out of his arms.

"You can let her go for two seconds, you know." I told him with my hand on my hips.

"Sorry, Alice." As soon as he removed his arm from Bella, I embraced her in a hug.

"I knew everything would work out." I told her.

"It was a near thing." She said and I felt her shudder. It _had_ been a near thing. Despite my common sense, I had almost taken the next plane out after them to meet them there thinking that perhaps I could help. Jasper, who knew me so well, anticipated this and stopped me. It was only until later that day that I had "seen" the outcome would be favorable.

"So did you kick Volturi ass?" Emmett said roguishly to Edward.

"Thankfully it didn't come to that although I am sure you can figure that out."

That had been one of the possible outcomes that I saw. It was horrible just to think of it. I mentally shivered.

_Flashback Alice's Vision_

_"Pain" Jane had said with a triumphant look on her face._

_Edward's feet rose a good foot off the ground, his face was contorted in agony. Bella struggled in Carlisle's grip._

_"Stop her!" Bella screamed. "Can't you see she's hurting him?"_

_"It's okay Bella. It's just a mind trick. Edward will be fine." Carlisle would not relent his hold on Bella._

"_Enough Jane. I think we have made our point." Aro told her and Edward landed on the ground weak from Jane's power. Carlisle let Bella go and she ran to Edward cradling him in her lap, sobbing._

"_You son of a bitch." Bella seethed staring directly at Aro. His eyes narrowed at her._

"_Such a waste." He made a tsking sound. "I wish could be sure of the future. Things can change in few months time." Aro said contemplatively. "Alec." He nodded to Jane's twin._

"_No." Edward shouted from his position on the floor struggling to get up but it was too late. Both Edward and Carlisle were struck immobile by Alec's powers. They had no choice but to watch in horror as Aro walked slowly to Bella and pick her up off the floor by her arm._

"_LET ME GO! What are you doing to them?" Bella struggled but Aro was too strong. "My dear, I should think that's obvious. They would never let me fulfill my judgment if they were able to move. I had Alec here, help me out with that."_

"_Edward! Carlisle!" Bella screamed looking from one to the other in a state of panic._

"_I wonder if you taste as delectable as Edward claims." He said before bending down to sink his teeth to her neck._

_After a few moments, he let Bella go and watched with amusement as her body, drained and void of all life, crumpled to the ground._

_Alec relinquished his hold on Edward and Carlisle. Carlisle immediately went to Bella to check for her pulse or any sign of life but Edward didn't wait for a confirmation on what he already knew. Bella was dead. With a roar full of rage and pain, he launched at Aro only to be stopped by Demetri and Felix as they restrained him. He fought them using everything he had. His face a mask of deep agony. His mate, the woman he loved so absolutely had just been murdered before his very eyes. In that moment, Edward had lost all his sanity._

"_Why Aro?" Carlisle pleaded. "Why would you do this to my family?"_

"_You know the rules Carlisle. There are no exceptions. You may go."_

"_NO!" Edward shouted still struggling against the hands that gripped him. "I will kill you for this, I swear to it."_

"_Are you threatening me, boy?" Aro sneered._

"_It's not a threat." Edward rasped his eyes glittered like black diamonds._

"_Let him go." Aro told Demetri and Alec._

"_Edward don't!" Carlisle shouted._

_But it was too late. Edward may have been quick but Aro had many more years of experience. Within seconds it was over. Edward was dead. What was left of his body lay next to Bella._

_Carlisle sobbed, broken. He had lost two family members this day. He would never be the same man. _

"_Do you wish to fight me too, Carlisle?" Aro asked him. Carlisle shook his head unable to speak."At least one of you had sense." His tone was smug._

"_Will you at least make sure that they are together." Carlisle whispered, his eyes pleading this last request to Aro._

"_I think that can be arranged. Demetri, Felix take them to the pyre room. It looks like they will be burned together."_

_End Flashback Vision_

I shivered again thankful that that particular vision did not come to pass. I caught Edward looking at me and judging by the expression on his face, he had seen what I was thinking about. His expression was the same in the vision when he realized Bella was dead.

_I'm sorry. That was careless of me. But it's okay it didn't turn out that way. _

Edward nodded briefly though the burning look didn't leave his eyes. It was then that I fully realized what the major difference was. In the first vision, I had not factored in Bella's cunningness and determination to get away from Carlisle to protect Edward from Jane's mental assault. When she did, Aro realized that not only could Bella block his own gift as well as Edward's but she could block Jane's as well. His own curiousness is what allowed Bella to live. He wanted to see how she turned out! This is why Edward didn't exude the happiness it should have when I first saw him. He was worried that Aro would want her for himself. It all made sense now.

Edward confirmed this with another nod as he heard my thoughts. I would need to pay extra attention to my visions of the Volturi and Aro in particular once Bella has been changed.

"We should head back to Forks." Esme said breaking into my thoughts. "Bella looks exhausted."

"It has been a long trip." Bella conceded leaning into Edward's embrace barely disguising a yawn.

"Come, my love. We'll get you home." Edward whispered to her.

She smiled contentedly with her eyes half closed. "Mmm, there's no place like home."

I heard Jasper chuckle. "I may have to start calling her Dorothy." To which he got a playful elbow in the ribs.

XXXXX

Love reviews. And sorry for the delay but my writing muse has been intermittent lately and I struggled a bit with this chapter


	31. Alarm Clocks Can Cause Serious Injury

Bella POV

To keep up the charade of my weekend in Seattle with the Cullen girls, Alice dropped me off at home. Charlie was in the front yard weeding the lawn when he saw me getting out of Alice's flashy yellow Porsche.

"You look beat kid." He said wiping the dirt from the grass on his pant legs and came over to the car to get my carry-on bag from the trunk.

"Thanks for noticing." I mumbled taking the bag from him.

"She was a real trooper, Charlie. Barely complained the whole weekend." Alice called out through the window with a grin.

_Charlie?_ Since when was Alice on a first name basis with my father?

"So did you…..uh…get a lot accomplished?" Charlie asked us. I could tell he was still uncomfortable with the concept of wedding planning and all it entailed. After all my parents own wedding was a low key affair compared to what I knew Alice had up her sleeve.

"Oh, tons." Alice replied. It was a blatant lie, of course. At least I thought it was. She might have planned the whole thing over the weekend as far as I knew.

Charlie just nodded, not even bothering to pretend any more interest. I knew it was hard for him, even now to come to terms that not even 2 months after my high school graduation I would be a married woman. Come to think of it, it was kind of hard for _me_ to come to terms with it. Marriage to Edward was what I wanted but it never would have occurred to me even two years ago that I would be travelling down the same path as my parents by getting married so young.

After Alice drove off, all I wanted to do was go in my room and crash. The exhaustion that had been creeping up on me finally hit with full force. Charlie followed me into the house probably to make sure I didn't fall flat on my face.

"Jake's been calling all weekend." He told me as he leaned against the banister watching my slow ascent up the stairs. My whole body stiffened as I halted and turned around. Charlie's expression was part sympathetic, part rueful.

"What did you tell him?"

"That you were in Seattle for the weekend with the Cullens."

Oh, Jacob must have loved that. "What did he want?"

Charlie shrugged. "Dunno, He didn't say but he has been persistent. Calling here nearly every damn hour. You should call him."

And incite a riot? I didn't think so. Whatever Jacob wanted to speak with me about, it was a moot point because _I_ didn't want to speak to _him. _

As if on cue, the phone rang making me jump.

"Hello." Charlie said answering the phone. He looked at me a mouthed "Jake". I shook my head furiously. "Yeah, she right here." I gave my father the evilest look I could muster silently letting him know that I was not happy with this. Maybe I should cook him tofu every night for dinner as payback. Charlie paid no attention and handed me the phone.

"What do you want Jake?" I said impatiently into the receiver still glaring at Charlie. He smiled and walked back outside whistling.

"You don't _sound _any different." Jacob replied.

"I didn't realize I was supposed to." And then it hit me. ""Oh, you're checking aren't you? To see…?" I couldn't say anymore for fear that Charlie would overhear.

"Well it looked kind of suspicious when you just up and disappeared to Seattle."

"Don't' worry." I said acidly. "Your stupid treaty still stands."

"It's too bad. I would have loved to have had an excuse to kill some parasites." He sounded cheerful at the thought.

"If that's the case, I'm not sorry to disappoint you." I told him angrily and hung up the phone.

Why couldn't he just leave well enough alone? It was my choice, I thought grumbling, continuing up the stairs. But all thoughts of Jacob and treaties disappeared as soon as my head hit the pillow. Both my body and my mind were just too tired to with Jacob or the stupid wolf treaty.

I didn't know how long I had been asleep for when I felt a cool hand brushing my hair from my face. Slowly opening my eyes, I saw Edward, his pale face nearly glowing in the darkened room.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you." He whispered close to my ear sending pleasurable shivers down my spine.

"Mmm, s'okay." I mumbled, scooting over to give him space on the bed. He sat down on top of the covers next to me, pulling me into his arms. "What time is it?" I asked him trying to make out the numbers on my alarm clock.

"It's 1 am." He answered. "You should go back to sleep." He said sliding his hand up and down my arm in a caressing touch.

I snuggled closer to him trying to let the soothing motion of his fingers on my arm lull me back to sleep but the memory of my earlier conversation with Jacob kept replaying in my head. There was no way we could stay here after the wedding. We would have to leave right away in order to prevent a fight that no one would recover from. My breath hitched as the full force of it hit me.

"What is it? Did you have a bad dream?" He asked noting my sudden anxiety.

"I wish." I replied. At least a dream was imagined. No matter how terrifying I could wake up. There was no waking up from this.

"That doesn't sound like you Bella. What's wrong?" He stopped his caressing motion and placed his finger under my chin making me look him in the eyes. Oh, he knew me too well.

"It's just that we'll have to leave before…you know. I don't think we can ever come back." I told him seriously trying to prevent myself from biting on my bottom lip as I usually did when I was nervous.

He sighed and held me closer. "I know. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. " I soothed. " It's not your fault the treaty doesn't have amendments for choice."

"Hmm. If I may ask, what made you think of this now?"

"Jacob." I said without thinking, cursing myself right after blurting it out. Edward was suddenly tense, sitting up as if trying to see if the threat was here in the room with us.

"He was here?" He asked, his tone suddenly seething in anger.

"No, he wasn't. I swear."

"Bella." He drew out the sound of my name.

"He called." Edward visibly relaxed slightly. "I think he wanted to check…you know...to make sure I was still…err…human. Charlie told him I went away with your family and he just assumed…"

"That I turned you into one of us. I understand." He said kissing my forehead as much to comfort him as well as me. "I won't lie to you, it bothers the hell out of me that he's still trying to contact you…but at least it was only a phone call."

"He's not going to let it go." I warned him. "And it frightens me…_he_ frightens me."

"He doesn't want to let _you_ go. A fact that I can relate to entirely but I will not let anything happen to you, I promise."

"It's not me so much that I'm worried about."

"Why does that not surprise me, my love? But don't worry. We have until the end of the summer to make all the arrangements and you can make your peace with Charlie. That is if you haven't changed your mind?"

I was tempted to swat him but it would hurt me more than it would him. "Of course, I haven't changed my mind. After what we just went through, how can you ask me that?" My tone was indignant as I sought to assure him.

He let out a breath. "Just making sure. I don't want you to feel pressured into doing anything you're not ready for."

I smoothed the frown from his face with tender fingers and kissed him. His arms tightened around me, rolling me onto his chest as he kissed me back.

"Does that tell you that I'm ready?" I asked when our lips parted.

"Hmmm, I think I may need some more convincing." He said innocently trying to hide a grin.

"I think I can do that." I said as I kissed him once more. Oh yeah, I could "convince" him all night long.

The next thing I knew, the blaring buzz of my alarm clock made me jump and fall of the bed.

"Ow!" I yelled feeling my knee pop as I rolled over. My knee was already starting to bruise and swell. Well, crap. Charlie must have left for work already otherwise he would have called out as soon as he heard the thump of my body hitting the floor, not that it was an unusual occurrence.

I used my mattress for leverage as I hoisted myself off the floor and soon discovered that walking would be problematic. I took a shower, letting the water cascade over my injured knee in the hopes that the swelling would go down and got dressed. By the time I finished getting ready, there was no time to put an ice pack on my knee, so after grabbing a strawberry Pop tart as a breakfast to go, I hobbled to my truck to drive to school, grateful that the injured knee wasn't on my driving leg.

My supposedly reliable truck decided to be not so reliable. The engine sounded like it was stuttering on the verge of a complete stall out every time I tried to accelerate.

"Don't do this to me now." I muttered, praying the whole way to school that it would not break down on me. I made a mental note to have Charlie look at it since I was no longer on friendly terms with my usual mechanic, Jacob, and I was still reluctant to ask Rosalie for any favors even though she had been nicer to me lately.

Slamming the door of my truck, I tried to make my way through the parking lot to the school entrance. The pain in my knee was so intense, I could barely walk. I could feel my fast twist into a grimace with each excruciating step. No doubt Edward would notice as soon as he saw me and ask what happened. How embarrassing would it be to tell him, I fell getting out of bed. I could just see his reaction…face down a bunch of powerful vampires out to suck my blood, no problem but getting out of bed…catastrophe.

Putting on my best face of indifference and willing myself not to limp and my knee not to give out as it felt like it would do any second, I walked as best as I could manage down the hall to my locker.

"You're late, Ms. Swan." Mr. Bilby said as I entered my first period class. I really hated being late but it couldn't be helped.

"Sorry." I mumbled head downcast as I made my way to my seat, trying to walk normally. I noted Edward's surprised look as I slid into the seat next to him.

"I thought you were staying home today. You're still exhausted." He said whispering so the teacher couldn't hear him.

I shook my head. "I decided to come in. We only have a few weeks left. I didn't want to miss anything."

He seemed to accept my answer. Wasn't he the one that said I should experience all the human experiences I had left while I still could?

All through class, I kept stretching out my leg, not wanting it to stiffen up. I caught Edward raising a questioning eyebrow at me. Smirking, I just shrugged hoping he wouldn't question me further about it.

Edward POV

Something was wrong with Bella. Oh, she tried to hide it, whatever it was but I saw the unusually pale pallor of her face and the fine sheen of perspiration on her forehead. She was in pain and I was bound and determined to find out why.

As soon as the bell rang signifying the end of the class, I grabbed Bella's hand and pulled her to her feet. Her gait was unusually slow as we followed the other students out of the class. Once in the hallway, I stopped and turned to her, my hand holding her arm to steady her.

"Okay, what's wrong?" I could hear the escalation of her heartbeat as she became aware that I knew something was off.

"I don't know what you mean." She replied taking the opportunity to lean against the wall. "I'm fine."

_Fine…_I hated that word whenever it was uttered out of Bella's mouth. It always meant the exact opposite.

I noticed her she was taking pressure off of her left leg, favoring it somehow. "You have this tendency of downplaying things when you think I'll worry so don't be offended if I don't believe you. You are very clearly _not_ fine."

"I hurt my knee, okay? Are you satisfied now?" She said, her face flush from what I assumed was embarrassment. I was relieved it was nothing more serious.

"How?" I asked her musing over the various ways Bella had found to injure herself, most completely benign.

If possible, her face turned even redder. "I…err…kind of fell off the bed when my alarm clock went off." She explained looking away in mortification.

"_Kind of_ fell off the bed?" I couldn't help the half smile that rose to my lips.

"Okay, there was no 'kind of' about it. I fell off the bed. Can we go to class now? We're going to be late."

"Show me." I said crouching down pulling her pant leg up. I heard a sharp intake of her breath when the fabric got to her knee.

"Holy hell, Bella!" I seethed all my amusement disappeared as soon as I saw the angry discoloration and swollenness of her knee. This was not a simple bump on the knee. "Did you even put ice on this?"

"No time. I was running late."

"You need to have this looked at." I told her getting to my feet, wanting to pick her up and carry her out of school but instead she started walking down the hall to our next class. I winced every time she did. Bella was trying so hard not to show any discomfort but I could tell what this was costing her.

"Again, no time. I have to work after school. I switched hours with Mike so I could have this past Saturday off."

"I'm sure he'll understand."

"Edward, I made a commitment. I can't break it."

I opened my mouth to argue wither her but quickly snapped it shut. Judging by stubborn tilt of her chin, I knew this was an argument I probably wouldn't win. "Okay, fine but right after work, I'm taking you to see Carlisle."

"It's a deal." She said as we walked into our next class. "In the meantime…do you think you could be my temporary icepack?"

"I think that can be arranged."

Alice agreed to take Bella's truck home while I took Bella to work. There was no way I was letting her drive with her injury. Despite her objections, I insisted on staying with Bella at work in case she needed assistance. Mrs. Newton wasn't too keen on the idea when it was obvious I wasn't leaving.

"This is not a social place, Mr. Cullen." She said imperiously.

"Bella is injured." I told her. "I would just like to help her out."

"Edward." Bella said in a warning tone.

"My goodness, why didn't you say so?" Her tone was all sympathy now. "If you're hurt dear, you need to go home."

"I promised Mike I'd cover for him since he covered for me on Saturday."

"Nonsense. It's not like we're bursting at the seams with customers. I can handle the store by myself. Don't you worry about me. Now get going."

"Thank you ma'am." I said giving Bella an "I told you so" look even though the woman cared more about a possible lawsuit if Bella should injure herself further at the store than her well being.

"No problem and please be sure to tell that father of yours I said hello." _If I wasn't 10 years younger…mm, mm, mm._

"I will ma'am." I tried to suppress a grin. I needed to get Bella out of there before Mrs. Newton's thoughts turned x-rated. Now I knew where Mike Newton got his dirty mind from. All this time I thought it was the father.

As I escorted Bella to my Volvo, I could tell she wasn't too happy with me just by her stiff posture. I didn't mean to be domineering. I wish she could see that I was looking out for her own best interests especially when she wasn't doing it.

"Must you always get your way?" she fumed as she tentatively tried to get comfortable in the seat.

"When it comes to your health, yes." My answer was matter-of-fact.

"I can't afford _not _to work Edward. I need the money."

"No you don't. You don't even need to work there. You have me." Why couldn't she just accept that?

"It's not the same and you know it." She crossed her arms over her chest and a cute pout formed on her lips. I resisted the urge to kiss it away. It was obvious she wasn't in the mood to be "dazzled". "I _like_ to be independent. I _like _having my own money. I _do not_ like having to ask for it like an allowance for cleaning my room."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come across that way." I said instantly regretful. She was well and truly angry and I felt horrible for making her feel that way. Of course she wanted to work. She'd been independent for so long, never truly relying on anyone but herself. It would take her awhile to get used to the fact that she could rely on someone else for a change.

She blew out a breath. "I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have over reacted. I know you're just trying to be helpful."

"Not to mention you are in a great deal of pain which will affect your mood. Don't worry, you're forgiven." I told her leaning over to kiss her wanting to take the misery from her face.

XXX

"I must say I am surprised you have managed to walk on this at all." Carlisle said with a frown after examining Bella's knee in his home office. If anything, despite my ministrations throughout the day, her knee looked worse. _Seriously, Edward, I am astounded she was able to make it through the day without collapsing._

I shouldn't have listened to her and just brought her to Carlisle when I first knew about it. No, she would have resented me for that. After all the enemies we faced, the ones that seemed to do the most damage were the internal ones.

"Let's just say that through the years I have developed a high threshold for pain." Bella replied.

"Yes, I can see that. Did you treat it with any ice?" Carlisle gave me a concerned look as I shook my head giving him the answer to that question.

"Does Edward's hand count?"

"Sadly, no." _Even though I am sure to her it has some healing qualities. Really, Edward you should have brought her to me immediately._ "Did you hear a popping noise when you banged it?"

"Yeah, then I saw stars."

"Hmm, well, it appears you have an acute anterior cruciate ligament injury or what is otherwise known as an ACL injury." At Bella's horrified expression, he continued. "It's not as serious as it sounds. What that basically means is you have a small tear in your knee ligament."

"Ouch." Bella said with a slight grin which Carlisle returned. "So how do we fix it?"

"First, I'll give you some NSAIDS to help alleviate the pain. Then, I am going to give you a _real_ ice pack. You are to apply it 10 minutes on and 10 minutes off. I have a flexible brace you can wear on your knee to help keep it immobilized. You should keep it on for a week."

Bella made a face. "Do I have to wear one?"

"It's either that or it gets worse. Then I'm afraid you'll be walking down the aisle with crutches if you get my meaning."

"She'll wear the brace." I interceded. Carlisle nodded and left the room to get the supplies. "It's only temporary, love."

"I know. I just can't bear the thought of the extra attention. It's so embarrassing and mundane that I did this getting out of bed. It couldn't be something more interesting?"

I couldn't hold back the laugh that escaped. Most of it was brought on by relief. Although painful as her injury was, I knew it could have been something far worse. Within a few weeks hopefully she would be completely healed.

Alice chose that moment to come bouncing in the room in her usual manner, jumping onto the examining table and crossing her legs. "Does your knee injury mean you can't go shopping?" Alice said with a frown.

"Yes!" Bella and I responded at the same time for completely different reasons.

"You don't have to sound so enthusiastic about it." _Maybe I can get her a hot pink brace or maybe a blue one…oh, the possibilities._

"No Alice."

Bella looked back and forth at us, confused. "What?"

"Don't worry about it. Alice thinks she's funny." I told her brushing my lips along the back of her knuckles.

"Nice save, Cullen." Bella responded dryly.

"Speaking of saves." Alice said. "Were you aware that your truck was running funny, Bella? I noticed when I was driving it."

"Uh…yeah. I was going to have Charlie look at it."

"Oh, no need. I already asked Rosalie to check it out. You needed an oil change. There was barely anything left."

"That's odd. I just had that done last month."

Alice shrugged. "Well, there was no leak as far as Rose could see so maybe it's been longer than you thought." _Maybe she'll let you get her a new car, Edward. The new Mercedes Guardian is missile proof…perhaps that would keep your overprotective tendencies under control…at least while she is in the car._

I didn't think so but after our previous conversation, I didn't want to bring it up. The Mercedes sounded interesting though. I would have to look it up and see if I could get my hands on it. If Bella did indeed replace her oil last month as she said, then her truck _was_ slowly dying. If I could get her to agree to let me purchase her a car when hers finally goes, the Mercedes may be just the thing.


	32. Planning Phases

Jacob POV

From the side of the road, taking cover within the dense foliage, I watched as Bella's old truck sputtered past me towards Forks High, its engine straining to putter forward on the morning dew covered road. Thankful of my enhanced eyesight, I could see through the worn interior of the truck despite the glare of the early sun. It was obvious something was wrong with the thing bit she would never take it to me to fix it for her like she would have done in the past. I was no longer that person to her. Damn the leeches for their interference!

_Brow, her eyes are still brown. _The knowledge of it escalated my mood. I still had time. Though I had spoken with her yesterday, I still wasn't ready to believe her. After all, wasn't deceit just another bloodsucker trait? I could still recall the absolute panic I felt when Charlie told me that Bella went away for the weekend with _them_. I was so sure that at some point over the weekend Charlie would receive a devastating phone call telling him that Bella was dead. Only I would know that she wouldn't be- that it would just be a convenient albeit cruel cover for her imminent transformation. It wasn't the case however and I allowed myself a breath of relief. There was still time, I repeated over and over; a litany in my head.

An idea started to form at seeing the laboring truck and I smiled outwardly as pieces of the plan started to fit together. Images of a broken down truck – a helpless Bella standing on the side of a deserted stretch of road filled my mind.

I hid the image away quickly as I heard the footfalls of another pack member. In human form I turned to see who was approaching. _Seth._ Poor kid. It was hard enough for any of us to accept that one day you were just a guy on the verge of adulthood and the next; you'd be walking on all fours praying you wouldn't get fleas. But he was just a kid, barely a teenager. I did have to admit, he took to it a lot better than I did. But then again, he doesn't have a Bella in his life; someone he was told he had to stay away from. I snorted, yeah like I had listened to that.

"Hey Jake, Sam sent me to come get you." Seth said cheerily as he peered suspiciously at the road to try to see what had caught my attention. I wish I remembered what it was like to be like Seth, so unnervingly happy.

"What does he want?" I asked gruffly, still eying Bella's truck as it slowly made its way down the stretch of highway.

Seth shrugged. "Dunno. But I think it's important…at least Sam thinks it is."

I rolled my eyes. Sam thinks everything is important, especially himself. "Okay kid" I said ruffling Seth's hair with a smile. "Let's go see what the lord and master wants."

Seth returned the grin as I knew he would and I followed him back to the reservation. I needed to be careful from here on in and not let anyone else detect my plans even if they were a direct defiance of the order of the Alpha.

Sam met me outside of his cabin not wanting to disturb Emily as she slept. I tried to gage his mood but his face was closed off to me.

"I have news of the red haired one." He finally said and paused for my reaction.

"Did we catch her and I wasn't aware?" As preoccupied as I was, I really didn't think that was the case. No, something else was going on here, something that Sam was hesitant to tell me about.

He sighed heavily and looked away from my gaze. "No. The Cullen patriarch came to the border and told me that she was out of the area and would not be back until close to the end of the summer."

Sam met with Carlisle and actually trusted information given to him by that bloodsucker? Granted, he was the most benign of the bunch but he was still the enemy. I forced down the need to shout but my voice was seething nonetheless. "And you believed him? How do you know it wasn't a trap?"

"He has no reason to lie." Sam tried to explain.

"He is a vampire. Isn't that reason enough?" This was too rich, even for me. Since when did Sam trust a vampire? Was he even fit to be Alpha at this point?

"The red haired one is as much a danger to his family as she is to us." He did look at me then. His eyes were hard but were imploring me to listen to him. Instead I just saw a red haze of anger blurring my vision.

"Bella is _not_ part of his family." I spat, feeling myself tremble with rage. Even though I said the words, in the back of my mind I didn't believe them…not really. Even without a legal ceremony, the Cullens had pretty much claimed Bella as one of their own and as much as it galled me, Bella was a willing participant.

"Yet." Sam finished. His expression turned sympathetic then and the last thing I wanted was his pity. "Listen Jacob, I know this is painful for you but you need to move on. Bella is marrying Edward…as distasteful as it is…it will happen. We cannot interfere and not break the treaty. I have assurances from Cullen that they will be far removed from here before the change happens and they won't ever be back."

So, Bella, in her insane desire to be with her leech lover would abandon Charlie and everyone she loves? This was crazy and I was not going to let it happen even if Sam was resolved to let it go. Wasn't intent to break the treaty enough cause for action even if it would be broken out of our boundaries? And what of Victoria? It was just a bit too convenient for me that the parasites just happened to know when the bitch would come after Bella again.

"How do you know about Victoria's time line? Did Carlisle tell you how he came by _that_ particular piece of information?"

Sam shook his head. "I won't tell you that Jacob. You are too angry right now to hear it. Perhaps when you are in a better frame of mind I will share with you the entire story. I only told you this much so you wouldn't feel the need to patrol so much." He cocked his head and looked at me as if he were seeing right through me. "You've changed, Jacob. You're not yourself anymore."

"Who am I then?" I asked flexing my jaw. I knew I was being belligerent but I didn't care.

"I don't know but there is a growing darkness inside of you. Perhaps you should seek the Shaman for advisement."

"Sure, sure." I muttered not listening anymore as I walked away. I wanted to escape from Sam before he could elicit a promise I had no intention of keeping.

Bella POV

"Alice! You're not supposed to sign a knee brace." I squealed when Alice signed her name with a grand flourish in blue permanent marker to the flesh colored fabric that covered me knee. I wanted to avoid attention, not attract it.

"Says who?" Alice asked, one eyebrow rose in query. I knew that look. It was the "don't argue with me look", although it was usually reserved for our shopping escapades when she wanted to buy something for me I would never wear.

"I don't know, _'they'_. " I replied with a frustrated wave of my arms. "You know the same omnipotent 'they' that say you can't wear white shoes after Labor Day."

"Oh no, Bella." Alice shook her head in mock censure. "That's not 'they', that's Vogue."

Edward chuckled at our exchange, his hand entwining with mine. "You won't win, love." He said placing a kiss to my temple and let his head rest on mine. His attention turned back to the office door as Carlisle walked back in the room with his supplies. I paled when I saw he was holding crutches. He couldn't…he _wouldn't._

"Uh, uh. No way Carlisle." I started to shake my head, staring at the offending things. "Just give me the pills and I'll be out of your hair." I was all set to jump off the examining table until Edward stopped me and eased me back gently.

"Sorry, it doesn't work like that Bella." Carlisle managed in a patient and indulgent tone. "You will find it incredibly difficult to walk with just the brace. The crutches will aid you."

"I can always carry you everywhere." Edward told me with an upward tilt of his lips and a leering gleam to his eye making me blush profusely at the image he presented.

As much as I relished the feeling of being held in Edward's arms, I could not fathom him carrying me around to every class like a helpless child. He _would_ do it too. Of that, I had no doubt.

"This is starting to feel like a conspiracy. Give me the stinking crutches." I said with a grumble holding my hand out for them. Carlisle, obviously pleased that I was going to comply, handed them over to me.

"You wound me, my love." Edward playfully put his hand over his heart.

"If you use those crutches like you're supposed to, you won't need them by the time of the graduation party."

"Alice." Edward warned. Apparently, he wasn't too excited about the prospect of a party either.

Alice's statement made my insides curl in anxiety. Graduation party? Since when? Hadn't Alice learned her lesson considering how well the last party, my birthday, turned out? I couldn't help the groan that escaped past my lips and it had nothing to do with the pain in my knee. "Alice, why are you doing this to me?"

"Oh, c'mon Bella. It will be your only _human_ high school graduation. It _should _be celebrated. And besides it's good practice for me to get ready for the most important party of all…your wedding. I haven't had much experience in throwing human parties, you know." She sounded indignant and almost reprimanding and I couldn't help but feel the slightest bit ashamed. Deep in my heart I knew she was doing this for me because she loved me as a sister and this was her way of showing it.

"Sorry, Alice. I know you're just trying to be a great sister. I promise not to complain too much."

With a broad smile, Alice clapped her hands in delight. "I knew you'd see it my way. I already sent the invitations this morning."

I saw Carlisle roll his eyes as he gave me an indulgent smile. "Please forgive Alice, Bella. If you really are uncomfortable with this, it can always be cancelled."

"No." I said trying to fake a smile but I knew it came out as a twisted grimace instead. "It's fine."

Edward insisted on helping me into the house after driving me home as I was still getting used to the crutches. I smelled the aroma of pepperoni pizza as soon as we walked in the door and briefly wondered if I would be condemning Charlie to a life full of take out once I left. Not that he would mind so much but I am sure his body would.

Charlie sat perched on the couch with a slice of pizza in one hand and a beer in the other. His attention was solely focused on the Mariners game on the television set.

"I'm home." I called out as both Edward and I entered the living room.

Charlie took one look at me and tried unsuccessfully to prevent the gulp of beer he just drank from spewing out of his mouth.

"Jesus Bella! What did you do to yourself this time?" He exclaimed. I couldn't help but notice the suspicious glance he gave to Edward. As if Edward would ever hurt me, vampire or not.

"Relax dad. I just fell out of bed."

"Must have been some fall."

"She has a slightly torn ligament in her knee. My father already examined her." Edward told him, explaining further.

Charlie shook his head in exasperation. "What am I going to do with you, Bells? I hope you're prepared for a lot of emergency room visits with her, Edward."

Edward wrapped his arms around my waist. "I guess it's a good thing my father is a doctor."

"At least it will save on the paperwork. If I had a dollar…well let's just say I'd be living more comfortably."

"Or at least be able to afford a personal chef." I mumbled caustically. "Pizza again, Dad?"

Charlie had the grace to look abashed. "Guilty as charged." He held up is hands. "I thought you were working late tonight and the game was on, so…"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it." I interrupted him. That was Charlie. Stick him in front of a baseball game with a pizza pie and a six pack and he was a happy man.

"You're welcome to join us." Charlie said clearing his throat, offering a rare invitation to Edward.

"Thank you, Charlie but I have to go home. Finals are coming up." Edward declined gracefully as I knew he would. With the exception of the time I dared him, I never saw him eat human food, aware that it would make him the vampire equivalent of sick to his stomach. He had assured me however that he would indulge in a bite of wedding cake to keep up appearances.

"Oh, right. Well good luck with them. Not that you'll need it…getting into Dartmouth and all."

Edward presented an awkward smile, shifting his weight onto his other leg. "I'll pick you up tomorrow for school." He told me giving me a kiss on the forehead. He never seemed to kiss me on my lips when Charlie was around.

"You don't have to. I can drive." Not that I wanted to but Edward was doing too much for me already.

"With your propensity for accidents, I'd rather not take the risk." He said sincerely cupping my cheek in his hand looking at me tenderly.

Well, there was that. I couldn't really argue with him given my track record. I was beginning to feel like the proverbial damsel in distress with Edward always coming to my rescue in some manner or another and I didn't like it. I had always been self sufficient, standing on my own two feet…more or less if you didn't count tripping on those same two feet.

"I don't think I have ever seen that boy eat." Charlie mused after Edward left. "He's not one of those vegetarians, is he?" He made a face that let on how distasteful he thought the idea was. No one would ever mistake Charlie for being anything but a meat and potatoes man.

I felt my face turn heated with color. "Uh, sort of."

If Charlie only knew what type of vegetarian Edward really was, he would flip. I almost laughed at the thought. A carnivorous vegetarian. What an oxymoron. It did bother me, keeping this whole other life from Charlie as I looked at him, his attention turned back to the game. He was so blissfully ignorant of the supernatural elements that existed in his peaceful corner of the world, elements that it had only taken me mere months to pick up on. How was it that I could see it when nobody else could?

I never was one to indulge in fantasies about vampires or other mythical creatures. The novels I chose to read were more classical in nature and that didn't include Bram Stoker's Dracula, although I never thought to ask Edward if he actually _did_ exist. My life had always been centered in reason and logic mostly because Renee had been the complete opposite when I was growing up. I needed to balance it out somehow. And yet here I was engaged to a vampire, my ex-best friend a werewolf and to me they were as real as my own existence. Funny that.

Reflecting back on that fateful day in biology when we first met, I was aware that the same traits that repelled the other students from the Cullens were the same traits that attracted me to them perhaps because they were so much like mine; their desire to avoid attention yet the need to blend in despite standing outside the circle of society. Yet they could never blend being as they were whereas I never had the problem…well before my involvement with Edward anyway. I was used to being part of the framework; invisible unless one actually took the time to look for it. An observer, never a participant. Except now I was the one being observed. It wasn't the most comfortable feeling but I could never be regretful for whatever it was that brought Edward to me. He was my other half; the better part of me even if he didn't think so.

Edward POV

Bella called it practice. I called it pure, sensual torture; the delicious feel of her body beneath mine, my legs encased between the silken feel of her bare thighs, the scent of her womanly arousal. As I devoured her mouth, the monster in me roared to life, demanding me to take was rightfully mine, to cross the line into unchartered territory and fuse us together irrevocably. My hands unconsciously wound themselves in her hair as I relished the feel of her hips undulating against my painful arousal. My inner conscience begged. _You need to wait Edward. Not until the wedding night can you do this._

It was that voice that called forth my sanity. With reluctance, I pulled back. Hands shaking with dissatisfied lust, I buttoned the shirt that she had so expertly unbuttoned so I could feel her skin against mine. I looked over at Bella whose face was petulant and suppressed a frustrated chuckle.

"You have to go to work." I told her gently removing her hand as she tried to pull me back to her.

She angrily glanced at the clock next to her bed. It was a Saturday morning; nearly a full week since she had hurt herself and she had promised Mrs. Newton that she would go back to work today.

"I suppose you're right." She admitted as she brushed a hand through her brown waves. She looked adorable and sexy with her kiss swollen lips that I had to force myself not to succumb to my baser instincts and finish where we left off. "Can we practice some more later?" she asked with a sly grin.

"Everything but the final act." I agreed. The more we were together like this; the less terrified I was that I would actually kill her on our wedding night. The monster in me wanted to claim not kill and for that I was grateful.

I drove her to work, still reluctant for her to drive herself. There were squad cars parked outside of Newton's and I was instantly on high alert.

"My dad's here. I wonder what happened." Bella spoke asking the same question that entered my head.

I parked across the street and we both went inside. Nothing seemed to be out of place though Mrs. Newton was highly anxious as she spoke with Bella's father. Her hands were gesticulating wildly as Charlie asked her questions.

"Over $10,000 worth of camping equipment gone. I don't understand." I overheard her lament to Charlie.

"I'll need to see a detailed list of the inventory that's been taken, Ma'am."

"Of course." She nodded and went to her computer to print out a list. In terms of burglary, it could have been a lot worse but this was a local mom and pop store. $10,000 was a lot to them.

"Dad, what's going on?" Bella asked her dad while Mrs. Newton was preoccupied.

"Bella, I forgot you were supposed to work today. Hello Edward."

I nodded a greeting. "Has there been a robbery?" I asked him though I already knew the answer.

"Yeah. Looks like the place was hit in the middle of the night so thankfully no one was hurt. The back locks were jimmied and the door busted down." He said nodding to the back door. Even from this far away I could see the splintered wood of the door frame. It looked like a battering ram got to it.

"Oh, Bella. I'm sorry I didn't call you. It's just been so…" Mrs. Newton said to Bella as she handed Charlie the list.

"It's okay Mrs. Newton. I understand."

"Do you have any security tapes?" Charlie asked her once again turning the conversation to the matter at hand.

Mrs. Newton visible paled. "No…I…uh…My husband never installed a security system. We never thought…we always assumed…" The woman was frazzled, looking this way and that cursing herself for not arguing with her husband when he refused to put an alarm system in.

"It's okay. It'll just make our job a little tougher but we'll do all we can." Charlie tried to assure her. _Why do people never learn…precaution is the best protection. _Charlie was clearly bothered with the woman's lack of foresight.

"Hmm," Charlie muttered looking at the list. _Cabin tent, portable grill, catalytic heater, sleeping bags, first aid kit, portable generator…_"looks like someone is taking a mighty fine camping trip and doesn't want to foot the bill." He finally said.

That summed it up, I thought as I listened inside Charlie's mind ticking off the items stolen. It was curious that no one touched the cash register.

"Do you still need me to work today?" Bella asked politely. Personally I would rather not have Bella stay here knowing the place was just burglarized. Without thought my hand tightened around hers in a subconscious effort to keep her close to me out of the way of any potential harm.

"Huh? Oh I hadn't thought of that…I know I should stay open to recoup some of my losses but I don't think I can focus today."

"Do you have insurance?" I asked her knowing full well that it would take hours just to deal with any insurance she may have.

"Oh. Thank you for reminding me, Edward. That will probably take a better portion of my day. Bella, dear, you don't have to stay."

"Are you sure? I can handle the store while you deal with the rest."

I sighed. I wanted to tell her not to push it, to take the day off gracefully with no argument. But this was Bella; always concerned about doing the right thing.

"No. It's okay. Really. Go home."

After Bella said goodbye to Charlie, I drove her back to my home.

"Well, that was bizarre." Bella muttered as we got into my car. "I wonder why no cash was stolen."

I wondered the same thing but I wasn't going to let it concern me any longer. I had better things to think about. Bella was here, next to me and we would have the whole day together. The entire town could be burglarized for all I cared.

Alice and Esme were going over the RSVP's for the graduation party when we walked in the door. Right away I noticed the fierce scowl on Alice's face. _She couldn't even make it to her graduation, one of the most momentous occasions in her life. I would have even bought the plane ticket. Well, I'll make damn sure she makes it to the wedding if I have fly there and drag her here myself._

Alice apparently was on the war path and I instantly felt sorry for the person that provoked her wrath.

"Alice, what's wrong?" Bella asked her nervously. Alice looked up at her, the scowl replaced by a sweet smile. I don't think it fooled Bella and it certainly didn't fool me.

"Your mom won't be able to make it." She said agitatedly waving the rsvp in front of her. "Phil." She sneered the name. "Broke his leg and they won't be able to fly out here."

"It's okay Alice. You don't have to be angry on my behalf." She shrugged pasting an insincere smile on her beautiful face.

Bella was upset and understandably so as much as she tried to hide it. I didn't need Jasper's gift to read that. I found myself angered and hurt for Bella's sake. As much as I should be thankful for Renee's flightiness where he daughter was concerned; it did after all mold Bell into the woman she became, the woman I loved, it was the complete lack of regard for Bella and her feelings that galled me. Renee could have decided to make the trip by herself even if her husband couldn't make it. Bella, as her daughter, should be her number one priority.

_Rein it in, Edward. This is Bella's mother. She didn't mean to hurt Bella. _Esme's thoughts reached out to me. No, she may not have meant it but the results were the same. Esme was right though. Bella wouldn't like to see me upset at Renee. She would only place the blame on her own shoulders.

"Mostly everyone else is coming though." Alice said trying to be cheerful.

"Did you expect anything else, Alice? Everyone has been dying to see the inside of this house."

"Good. They can get it out of their system them so by the time the wedding rolls around everyone's focus will be where it should be…on the bride." She replied.

XXX

A/N: Sorry no evil cliffhanger on this one but I have set up much drama to come. Stay tuned…


	33. Graduation Day

Bella POV

The few weeks leading up to graduation passed by in a blur with the weather becoming slightly warmer to mark the passage of time although I had it on good authority the mountain range directly above our small town stayed like the depths of winter all year round. My knee, which had begun to heal, was painful but manageable. Carlisle had assured me that it would take at least six weeks before I would walk without a limp to mark the pain. It did not please me that I would be limping across the stage to get my diploma but at least the crutches and the brace were gone.

School was a waste of time for those of us who had already received our college acceptance letters. In English we would watch movies based on old classic novels. This was my favorite part of the day not because of the movies themselves but because when the teacher shut off the lights in the classroom, Edward would skate his hand up my thigh sending shivers of electricity through me. I had to give him credit for being so stealthy but as practiced as he was, I could tell he was just as affected by it as I was.

Alice was expecting a big crowd for the party and I was the taste test dummy for the food since for obvious reasons she couldn't be. We finally decided on ordering heroes and plenty of appetizers and chips. She wanted something more extravagant but I told her to save it for the wedding. High school kids didn't go for fancy fare like caviar and finger sandwiches.

The only dark cloud that seemed to be hanging over the town was a string of seemingly related small burglaries; the Newton store being the first of a few. The next place to be hit was the local grocery store and after that logs from the lumber yard. No money was stolen; only the inventory. Charlie was upset on how slow the investigation was going and by the fact that none of the shopkeepers had been vigilant enough to have security cameras installed. They all took it for granted that Forks being a small town wouldn't attract a criminal element like Seattle would.

Charlie made sure I always carried a full can of pepper spray with me since Newton's got robbed.

"Keep it in your pocket, Bells. Not your purse. You want to be able to get to it easily." He had said. I put it in my purse anyway. If he only realized how inconvenient it was to stick it into the pockets of my tight jeans not to mention I didn't always have pockets.

The night before graduation, I helped with setting up the decorations for the party. Alice, being Alice went a little overboard and was commanding everyone like a drill sergeant. Emmett and Jasper strung the lights outside on the trees along the road leading up to the house. Edward was responsible putting together the music mix. Esme and Rosalie decorated the inside while I made the various dips. It was the one thing they trusted me with since ladders were out of the question for me; with or without my bum knee.

"I hope I made enough." I said as I felt Edward's arms slide around my waste and rest his chin on my shoulder.

"I'm sure you made plenty, love. Why don't you relax for a bit? You've been standing on your feet for a long time."

I looked around the kitchen at the mess I made. Empty boxes, cartons and bags littered the Esme's beautiful granite counter tops. "I have to put all this away and clean up first."

"No you don't" He said and before I knew it he was whizzing around the kitchen so fast he left image trails behind him. The kitchen was spotless moments later and I just gaped at him. "I have my uses you know." He said with a smirk.

"You sure do." I stood up on my toes and pulled his head down to mine for a kiss. He backed me up against the counter encasing my legs between his and his hands lightly gripped the sides of my head as he pulled me closer deepening the kiss.

"Edward!" Alice shouted from the living room. "What's with the classical music? We want people to dance. Not sleep."

Edward groaned pulling away and rested his forehead against mine.

I chuckled. "Duty calls."

""I'll be right back. Then I'll take you home. We have a big day tomorrow."

Before he left I took the opportunity to trace my fingers in circles on his chest. "Are you staying over tonight?" I asked him seductively.

"You keep doing that and I may have to" He sighed then in overly dramatic sorrow. "But no, we have plans to go hunting tonight. Having one human in the house is easily tolerable especially since it's you." – He grinned- "but having 65…well we don't want to chance it….Is your dad taking to tomorrow to the ceremony?"

"Yeah. He took the day off."

"EDWARD!" Alice screamed again. "These songs aren't going to change themselves."

"C'mon" he said taking my hand in his and walked us towards the living room. "If she's like this now, God help us when it comes to the wedding."

"Vegas is sounding better and better all the time." I agreed with him.

"I heard that!" Alice accused playfully from the other room

Of course she did. Damn vampire hearing.

I didn't get much sleep that night. I never did when Edward wasn't beside me. But this was worse. My mind kept straying to the milestone before me and subsequently the bigger milestones yet to come. It was all happening so fast. Part of me wanted it all to be over already, to be married to Edward for eternity and the other part wished time would slow down, if only just a little.

Groggily, I made it out of bed when the phone rang. Charlie must have picked it up because it didn't ring after the second time. After putting on my robe, I carefully made my way down the stairs to see who was on the phone.

"Yeah. Okay. I'll be there." Charlie hung up with a grim look on his face.

"Was that Mom?" I asked hoping it was her calling to wish me congratulations but I knew it wasn't. If it had been her, Charlie would have handed me the phone.

He looked up surprised, not aware that I was in the room with him. "Sorry. I didn't see you there."

"So it…uh... wasn't Mom?" I asked sullenly.

"No. I'm sorry. She'll probably call you later. That was the station. They need me to go in." He said approaching the subject with hesitation.

"Today?"

He raked a hand through his hair. "Yeah. There was another burglary. The gun and hobby shop this time. Weapons were stolen."

"Weapons? You mean like guns?"

"That's exactly what I mean. Maybe knives too." I must have looked really upset to him because he gave me a sympathetic look. "Oh, shit, honey. I'm sorry. I'm going to make your graduation. I promise. I'm just going to be a little late. Do you think you can drive yourself?"

"Sure dad. This is important to you. Do what you have to do."

Charlie got off the couch an embraced me in a bear like hug. It almost reminded me of one of Emmett's hugs, except much warmer temperature wise. He tilted my chin up with his thumb. "I wouldn't miss this day for the world. I hope you know that. I'll be there as soon as I can."

"I know that Dad." I said my throat convulsing as I was trying to hold the tears back so he couldn't see how upset I was.

"I'll see you later. Love you kiddo."

"Love you too Dad."

He gave me a rare kiss on the cheek and after picking up his badge and gun, he left. First my mother, now my father. I knew this was important. Stealing weapons was a serious matter. Chin up, Bella, I scolded myself. Stop being so darn selfish. Charlie would be there…eventually. I knew he would. So I would just be driving myself to my own graduation. So what?

After hopping in the shower, I dressed in a short black tank top dress and matching bolero jacket courtesy of Alice. After the last fiasco I was hesitant to wear it but Alice assured me that it would be perfect. The graduation gown would cover it throughout the ceremony and the jacket lent it an air of respectability, that was until I would take it off when Edward and I would be finally alone after the festivities were over. The flats I had to wear with it were necessary given the state of my knee but I was never one for heels anyway, not with the balance issues I had.

I finished getting ready and glanced at the clock. I just had enough time to drink some coffee and eat a pop tart hoping the carbohydrates would elevate the sudden down turn of my mood. Just as I finished off the pastry, the telephone rang. I debated answering it, knowing that it might delay me but thinking it might be Edward, I picked it up.

"Hi baby." It was Renee. It was official, I was going to be late but at least Renee called. She hadn't totally forgotten her daughter.

"Hi Mom."

"I'm so sorry I couldn't be there today but you understand don't you."

"Sure I do. It's okay." I assured her. It wasn't her fault that Phil broke his stupid leg. She continued to prattle on how Phil was doing, on how great the weather was in Fort Lauderdale, how fulfilling her life and how much she missed me. Every so often I would make a noise just to let her know I was still there and she wasn't talking to thin air, though I doubt she would even notice if she was. Never the less, despite how flighty and scatterbrained she could be, she was my mom and I loved her.

"I can't believe my baby girl is graduating high school today. And I'll be a mother-in-law by the end of the summer. I feel so old." She lamented.

"Mom, you could never be old."

"You're such a sweetie for saying that. Listen, I just wanted to wish you congratulations."

"Thanks."

"I want you to take lots of pictures and please try to be in some of them."

"I will." Renee was well aware of my aversion to being in front of the camera as opposed to behind it but I knew that although she couldn't be here today, my graduation was still important to her.

"Promise?"

"I promise."

"Good girl."

"Um, Mom, I have to go. I'm running late." I said as I looked at the clock once again. It took about 15 minutes for me to drive to the school and the ceremony was due to start in five minutes.

"Oh, sure. Have a great time at Alice's party and don't forget to tell Edward I said hello."

"I won't Mom."

"Love you baby."

"Love you too Mom."

The weather was typically dreary filled with cloud cover, I noticed as I got in my truck and started it. Pulling out of the drive, my truck started to make those laboring, puttering sounds again.

"Oh, no. Not today." I grumbled as I drove slowly down the wet winding road towards the school. "How is this even possible?" I knew I was talking to myself but I didn't care.

After one particularly loud sputter and shake, the truck just died.

"Shit!" I was at least a good 5 miles from the school if not more. It was way too far for me to walk even with a good knee. I popped the hood and got out of the truck slamming the door.

Peering into the engine, I realized I had no idea what I was looking for. "Who am I even kidding?" I grumbled as I closed the hood. Just for good measure I kicked the tire.

"Ow! Crap! Ow,! Ow!" I yelled out hopping up and down on one foot. Bad idea, Bella. Now both legs hurt. Completely irritated with myself, I yanked open the door and fished my cell phone out of my purse and called my dad, praying he would not be too busy with his investigation to answer.

"Dad!" I said into the phone as soon as he picked up.

"_Bella. Where are you? I'm at the school. Everyone's worried about you. Shouldn't you be here by now?"_

"I know, I know. The truck died. I'm about 5 miles from the school. Can you pick me up?"

"_Yeah. Just give me a minute to tell Carlisle and I'll be on my way."_

It was ironic that I was the one that was late and not Charlie. As I was putting the phone back in my purse, I heard a faint rustle behind me.

"Hello, Bella."

Startled, I turned around to see Jacob standing there. He looked _and_ sounded different. There was an unholy light in his eyes and a cruel twist to his lips. As I inspected further, I noticed him holding a gun in his hand. Instinctively I backed away until my back was against the truck and I could move no further. If I ran, he would just catch me.

"It was you, wasn't it? You were the one behind all the burglaries."

He shrugged indifferently. "You caught me…now I caught you." He stalked closer to me, closing the gap of space in between us to grab my upper arm. I hitched my breath in pain, felt the skin already starting to bruise.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I asked him with an angry stare.

"Keeping you from making the biggest mistake of your life." He spat and yanked my arm. I tried to pull away but I was afraid my bone would snap from the biting force he was putting on my arm.

""I won't go with you Jacob." Strangely enough, I wasn't afraid of the gun he was holding. He wouldn't shoot me, not if he thought he was trying to save me.

He sighed unpleasantly. "Now how did I know you were going to say that?"

The last thing I saw was the butt of the gun as he raised it and slammed into my head. There was a burst of pain and everything went black.

Edward POV

We arrived early at the school. The football field was adorned with metal folding chairs and a fabricated stage complete with podium and microphone. I was hoping to have some time with Bella before we were scheduled to sit in our assigned seats. Since I was a "C" and she was an "S" we wouldn't be sitting near each other during the ceremony.

Scanning through the sea of yellow caps and gowns, I couldn't locate Bella nor could I smell her scent. It was beginning to worry me. My gut clenched. Something was off.

We were being herded towards our seats by the teachers but my concentration was elsewhere. Where the hell was Bella?

"She'll be here Edward. She's probably just running late." Alice whispered to me as we sat down. She too noticed Bella was missing.

"Calm down. Charlie's not here either. Isn't he driving her here?" Jasper told me.

I forced myself to relax. They were right. It's just where Bella was concerned I would always worry. My attention alternated between the empty seat where she _should_ be sitting and to the entrance of the Spartans field. I looked over at the rest of my family sitting in the bleachers. They, too, looked disturbed.

The principal started to speak then, his voice echoing in the open air. It was the same typical speech that I had heard too many times to count so I didn't bother to listen. I spotted Charlie entering through the gates then and watched him look over the crowd of graduates. He was _looking_ for her. Why? Shouldn't she be with him?

I nudged Alice sitting beside me. "Charlie's here but not Bella." I informed her through clenched teeth trying to rein in my apprehension.

"I don't know what's going on Edward. I haven't seen anything"

I observed Charlie go up to Carlisle and Esme.

"_Have you seen Bella?" _He asked them.

"_No" _Carlisle shook his head. _"I thought she was with you."_

"_There was another burglary this morning. I had to check it out. Bella was going to drive herself."_

Fear, sharp as a knife's edge pierced me. As I went to get up to find out what the hell was going on, Jasper prevented me by putting a restraining hand on my arm.

"What the hell are you doing, Jasper?" I seethed.

"Preventing you from overreacting. Now sit down." He ordered.

I heard the distinct sound of Charlie's cell phone ring and I strained to listen to what was being said.

"_Bella. Where are you? I'm at the school. Everyone's worried about you. Shouldn't you be here by now?... Yeah. Just give me a minute to tell Carlisle and I'll be on my way."_

Charlie closed his phone and turned to Carlisle. "_Bella's truck broke down about 5 miles away. I'm going to go pick her up."_

I sat back down visibly calmer. "_Did you hear that Edward. Bella's safe. It's just her truck."_ I heard Carlisle's thoughts directed toward me. Nodding once, I turned my focus back to the stage where the Valedictorian was now giving her speech.

"You see Edward. Everything is okay. Bella is fine. Though I can't say the same about her truck." Alice said.

As speeches went, it was short and to the point. Something I was grateful for albeit uncommon after hearing my fair share throughout the years. Our row was instructed to stand and wait for the calling of our names to receive our diplomas. I took the opportunity to search again for Bella. Her seat was still empty. I had to force myself not to panic. They probably just had to wait for a tow truck or maybe pull the truck over to the side of the road to get it out of the way. If she wasn't here soon, she would miss receiving her diploma entirely.

"Isabella Swan." The principal called into the microphone. There was absolute silence as students began to look around them. He cleared his throat. "Isabella Swan." He called out again louder this time and still no Bella. I heard a dim buzz around me as our other classmates spoke in low tones wondering as I was about her whereabouts.

"_Maybe she's in the bathroom."_

"_She probably fell down again somewhere."_

"_I hope nothing has happened to her."_

"Something's wrong Edward." Alice said fearfully, placing fingers around my wrist, her eyes wide in panic.

It was then that I heard it, actually listened for it; the distinct sound of police sirens about 5 miles away. The distance Bella supposedly was when she called Charlie to pick her up.

That was it. I wasn't waiting anymore. I got up and tried to walk at a human pace to where the rest of my family was sitting in the bleachers. Alice and Jasper followed me, none of us caring that we were interrupting the graduation ceremony. Our sole focus was Bella.

I heard the unmistakable sound of Alice's hitching breath behind me. Halting in mid stride, I spun around grabbing her shoulders, giving them a slight shake. Jasper hissed at me but I didn't care.

"What, Alice, What?" I asked desperately. Terror was strangling me to the point where I could barely function.

Her eyes were the saddest I had ever seen them when she looked back at me. 'I…I can't see her anymore Edward." Her bottom lip trembled as she spoke.

I saw into her mind. There was nothing but a black void where Bella's future should be. I wanted to roar in grief. No! She is alive…she has to be.

As we ran to our cars, I shed my cap and gown, tossing them carelessly on the ground. Jasper and Alice jumped in the car with me and the rest of my family went into Emmett's jeep. My tires screeched loudly as I sped out of the parking lot.

"Don't…don't you dare manipulate my emotions, Jasper." I said harshly as I felt the influence of his gift.

"It won't do you or Bella any good if you go into whatever situation this is half cocked."

He was right, I knew he was. But I needed to feel this anger, this pain.

The street ahead was a mass of flashing lights and squad cars as I skidded to a full stop and jumped out of the car. Bella's truck sat idle in the middle of the road as if nothing was wrong. I spotted Charlie in the fray of police officers. His thoughts were a chaos of splintered fragments. He looked up at me with such stark fear in his eyes that it was all I could do not to sink on my knees in agony. The force of it matched my own. My steps slowed down as I got closer to the middle of the scene, terrified of what I would find there.

It was then that I saw it; an evidence marker by a wet spot on the dark pavement. I didn't need vampire eyesight to know what it was. I could smell it. It was blood…more specifically, Bella's blood.

Alice POV

SNAP! I could literally hear the already frayed tether that linked Edward to his sanity sever the moment he saw Bella's blood on the ground. We all watched horrified as my brother sunk to his knees before the puddle reaching out to touch it but stopping his hands from actually connecting. His shoulders shook with dry sobs and his face was a twisted mask of agony.

Please, please let her be alive, I prayed to whatever deity that would listen.

It was Charlie that placed a comforting hand on Edward's shaking shoulder. "We don't know if it's her blood, son."

"It's hers." Edward whispered hoarsely his face buried in his hands. His tone suggesting there was no doubt in his mind who the blood belonged to.

"We need a DNA test to be sure."

Edward rubbed his palms to his eyes as if trying to halt the flow of tears as he got up slowly moving like a robot that was low on power; _like an old man._

When he turned to look back at us; his family, I gasped at what I saw. His features were suddenly gaunt and his eyes dark as pitch. I saw his steely resolve when he turned back to Charlie.

"What happens now?" He demanded.

Charlie's answer was brief and full of resolve. "We search."

He nodded and made his way back over to us, anger etched in the lines of his face.

"It's the wolves." He said so low that only we could hear. "Specifically one wolf. His stench is all over this place."

"I never liked that stupid treaty anyway. Let's get us some wolf dinner and get my baby sister back." Emmett clapped his hands and licked his lips in anticipation.

"Now wait a second." Carlisle interrupted. "Before we do anything, we should talk to Sam first. He may know what's going on.

"I never questioned your judgment before Carlisle but I'm doing it now. Are you insane? Sam is the alpha…he probably perpetrated the whole thing."

"Edward! We are all worried for Bella but that's no way to talk to your father. Apologize right now." Esme reprimanded.

Edward immediately looked contrite but I could still sense the seething anger underneath. "I'm sorry Carlisle."

"I understand, son. Look, I know you don't trust Sam, I really don't either but we spoke not too long ago. I don't believe he would have done this. He preserves human life. He wouldn't have taken Bella…not like this. I will go to the borderline and see if he knows anything."

"You won't have to. He came to us."

Edward was looking to a point behind where Carlisle was standing. I followed his gaze to see bright yellow eyes staring back at us eerily. The wolf walked silently backwards into the shelter of the trees beckoning Edward to follow.

Unnoticed by the police who were busy tagging the crime scene both Carlisle and Edward followed Sam, leaving the rest of us behind.

Our house became command central that night. The food and refreshments so carefully prepared for the party guests now served as sustenance for the various search parties that came in and out of the house. We had enough space to provide a rest stop for Charlie's men and as well as the space for a complete communications set up.

Night had fallen swiftly with no word on Bella. Esme and I had stayed behind to keep the searchers well fed and full of caffeine while Edward, Carlisle, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett joined the search.

Carlisle had told us that Sam was sure that Jacob was the one that took Bella…that he had been acting strange lately and rarely shifted into his wolf form. Edward surmised that he did that so the rest of the pack wouldn't be privy to what he was up to. The Quileute's would search their own territory along with some of Charlie's men as we were bound by the treaty to stay off the reservation. Edward was not too happy with that arrangement. He felt the treaty was already broken.

As the hours wore on without any positive word, our worries increased until they were a living breathing thing. I felt completely helpless and bound by the limitations of my ability. If Jacob never left Bella, there was no way I could see her…no way I could tell if she were hurt or even alive. Judging by what Sam had to say, Jacob may be so far gone in his obsession with Bella that her death would be the better alternative. If he couldn't have her, he wasn't going to allow anyone else too. And that frightened me more than anything else.

Taking a brief moment to calm myself, I looked around the room at the various townspeople that were converged in our living room. It seemed like everyone in Forks had joined the search. Esme sat down next to me and placed a comforting arm around my shoulders. The stress and worry were apparent on her face too. She had claimed Bella as one of her own long ago and she worried as any real mother would.

"It's amazing how a situation like this brought the town together." I didn't realize I spoke aloud until I heard Angela return my comment.

"I have only seen it like this once before and Bella was the one missing then too." She said.

"What do you mean?" Esme asked curiously. No one had told her what happened on the day we left months ago, but I knew.

"The day you left last September." Angela said softly. "Bella just disappeared. Sam of the Quileute's found her near catatonic in the woods. We had a search party then too."

"Oh, dear God." Esme exclaimed, her hand covering her mouth in mortification as she blinked back tears that could never fall.

"She was taken this time." I reminded her fighting the images in my hand of all that could have occurred in the hours since Bella went missing.

"We'll find her. Edward will find her." Angela said comfortingly. "You have to believe that."

Yes, I had to believe that because God help us all if they didn't.


	34. Breaking Her

Edward POV

For the first time since I met Bella, I could say with absolute certainty that the blame for this could not be laid at my door. The knowledge of that however offered me no peace nor did it dampen the torturous agony that ignited within me the moment I spotted Bella's blood so carelessly spilled on the ground; blood that was as sacred to me as any blessed religious icon to a devout follower of Christianity. I tried to stop myself of conjuring the images that would have caused it to be there. It would serve no purpose but to emotionally cripple me. I could not afford to be hindered that way.

Charlie ordered the search party teams to go off in various directions. He too was trying to detach himself emotionally from what had to be done but he was meeting with as much success in that as I…absolutely none. Unlike myself, Charlie had no idea who had taken Bella. He wouldn't want to know…he wouldn't believe it if he did. After all Bella and I had been through, the latest going against the Volturi and winning only to be bested by an immature, volatile wolf made me almost physically ill, if that were possible.

Hours had gone by and by this point it seemed like we were literally running in circles. I couldn't get a handle on Jacob's scent. It seemed to be everywhere and nowhere at the same time. The sky was getting darker, the winds picking up, the temperature dropping. Someone had mentioned there was going to be a blizzard high up in the mountains and they were fearful of it reaching the lower grounds where we were. I prayed the mutt had the forethought to have something warm for Bella wherever he took her. She was such a slight little thing, I feared the barest whisper of a cold breeze would make her ill. God may have mercy on the wolf if anything was to happen to Bella but I would not.

Charlie was looking at a map of the area, circling in radius' going outward from where we were and trying to establish a possible distance that could have been travelled in the time that had passed. It would have been a good method if we were dealing with a normal human but we weren't. I had opted to be on the search team with Charlie hoping I could covertly use what knowledge I did have to guide him in the right direction. He had needed a break though, so now we were standing on the border of my family's property; Alice's party lanterns hanging from the trees providing some lights.

"You should tell Charlie what you know. It will help with the search." Carlisle told me glancing over at Bella's father.

I snorted at this. "He doesn't want to know."

"It doesn't matter. He is her father and has a right to the knowledge. What he does with the information is up to him."

Deep down I knew Carlisle was right. I couldn't delay this conversation any longer. Walking over with trepidation to where Charlie was, I stood in front of the light casting a shadow on his map. Annoyed that I was hindering him, he looked up at me.

"I believe it's Jacob Black that has Bella." I informed him matter-of-factly, bracing for the denials that I was sure would come.

_Jake…naw. I don't believe it. _Charlie scratched the shadow of beard on his jaw. "Jake would never hurt Bella. Sorry, Edward. I just don't see it." He shook his head. The gesture angered me.

"You don't _want_ to see it, Charlie. It's a big difference."The words came out harsher than I intended but he needed to see the blatant truth.

_Who the hell does this kid think he's talking to? _Charlie's face reddened in anger. "Don't think I don't see what's going on here. Just because you're jealous that Jake was a serious contender for Bella doesn't mean you can accuse him of this." He thought I was saying this out of jealousy? Precious time was being wasted because he wanted to deny the truth of my words. "Jake loves Bella. He would never hurt her, not like this."

"He's obsessed with her. Don't confuse it with love." I told him. From behind Charlie, I caught the intense dark glare of Billy Black, Jacob's father. I didn't see any fear in his gaze or any sign of malevolence in his mind just a determined resolve to do what was right. "If you don't believe me, why don't you ask your friend?" I nodded in Billy Black's direction.

Charlie turned around to look at his best friend. "Billy?" Charlie questioned, his tone was uncertain and confused.

"I'm sorry Charlie. As much as I have prayed that it is not so, what the Cullen boy says is true." He handed Charlie a crumpled piece of paper. "I found this in Jacob's room. You'll notice that most of the items on that list match what has been stolen recently."

Charlie saw it then, the truth written all over Billy Black's face and scrawled on the paper before him like a beacon of light over a dark sea. "Aw, hell, Billy." Without questioning him further, Charlie took the radio from his side holster. "I need an APB on one Jacob Black…6'8" approximately 270 pounds, black hair, brown eyes. Consider him armed and dangerous. He will have my daughter with him so handle with extreme caution." He gave a sympathetic look towards the somber Quileute man he always considered his closest friend. "If possible, bring him back alive."

"Thank you for that." Billy Black was fearful of the outcome as much as he was ashamed that is some could commit so abhorrent an act as kidnapping an innocent. "I'm not making any promises." Charlie muttered. "I might as well get the Mounties in on this too. He may have found his way into Canada by now.

I thought differently. Where ever they were, I knew it was not too far away. Jacob had too much with him to travel too far. But we head searched every square inch of the area and found nothing. I urged myself not to give up hope. Sam had informed Carlisle and I that due to Jacob's withdrawal from the pack, even if he did change into wolf form they wouldn't be able to merge with his mind to find out where he was. Jacob was his own pack now. A terrifying thought to be sure.

I would not fool myself into thinking that the wolves, regardless of Jacob's actions, would not do everything in their power to prevent actual harm to come to Jacob at the hands of my family. No, his downfall, no matter how much I hated it, would have to be done at the hands of the humans or the pack.

That rationale would break into a thousand pieces however, should Bella not survive. No amount of pleading by Carlisle would stop the bloodlust that I knew would consume me if that were the outcome. I would kill Black and enjoy it. She _was_ alive. I had to keep repeating that to myself. She might be hurt but she was still alive.

Bella POV

The first thing I became aware of was the jackhammer like pounding on my skull. I reached up, my hand trying instinctively to go towards where the pain was emulating from only to find I had limited use of my arms. I drew a sharp intake of breath as I realized my hands were tied. At further examination, I found my legs were tied up as well. I struggled against the tight bonds. The attempt was futile. _What the hell happened to me?_

"I didn't mean to hit you so hard."

I heard the gruff words and the memory suddenly returned…my truck, Jacob, the gun, darkness. My eyes snapped open and I scooted backwards away from the voice only to back into a cold nylon wall. Jacob sat, legs folded watching me cautiously as he whittled a piece of wood with a small knife. A wave of nausea rolled in my stomach and I tried to fight off the dizziness that threatened to pull me into unconsciousness once again.

"What did you _do_ Jacob?" The words came out panicked. I wanted to rub my arms to ward off the cold. It was freezing in here, wherever _here_ was.

"I told you, Bella. Preventing you from making the biggest mistake of your life."

"By k...k…kidnapping me? You tr…tr…truly are ins…s… sane." My teeth were chattering as my body was convulsing in shivers. The dress I was wearing was not made to insulate against this bone chilling weather. I heard the wind whip around outside the tent and as I eyed the distance between me and the opening, I knew my chances out there were no better than the ones in here.

"Oh, for heaven's sake Bella, even if you did manage, tied up as you are, to escape me, you wouldn't last 10 minutes in that. In case you haven't noticed, it's a blizzard out there. No one is coming on or off this mountain. Now get in the damn sleeping bag." Jacob told me as if he were reading my thoughts. He saw my hesitation. "Unless you don't _want_ all ten toes."

It was awkward but somehow I managed to crawl into the sleeping bag not because he ordered it but because I knew if I were to survive this night and try to get away, I would need to keep warm.

If I couldn't talk him into taking me back, I may have to take my chances. I needed to sit here and bide my time, to allow my body to rest for what was to come. Though even at my full strength, I feared I wouldn't be able to get away and survive. "Edward is going to kill you for this."

Jacob actually laughed. Was this a joke to him? "Oh, Bella. You really are too funny. Edward is probably dead by now as well as all of your leech friends. They would have crossed the treaty line as soon as they realized you were missing and the pack would have attacked and killed them."

No, I thought. It couldn't be true. The pain was overwhelming; drowning me. Think logically Bella. It was dark now. That would have been hours ago. Edward would have known I was missing soon after Charlie discovered I wasn't by my truck. Oh God, Charlie. What he must me going through right now.

"You're lying. If that were the case, you would have returned me hours ago."

He shrugged. "Maybe. Maybe , not. You'll never know will you?"

Never know? Was he planning on keeping me forever? Forcing the idea of Edward being harmed out of my head because if I believed that all would be lost for me, I spoke again. "How could you do this to Charlie? I can't believe that Sam would condone this either."

"Charlie? He would thank me if he knew the truth." He chuckled humorlessly then. "And Sam, well let's just say that a Black was never meant to follow a Uley."

I tried to recall all the stories I had heard from my days spent on the reservation. I knew that Sam was the alpha by default because Jacob didn't want the responsibility. If Jacob wasn't following Sam anymore that could only mean that Jacob was acting on his own. That was not good.

"I can see you finally figured it out. That's right Bella. I went rogue so to speak. I don't follow anyone now."

If I thought Jacob was dangerous before, that danger just increased a hundred fold. He was not bound by any rules or ethics anymore, just the ones created in his own mind to justify what he had done and whatever he was going to do. He had truly crossed the line from sanity to something else. My Jacob, the one who helped me through the worst time of my life, the one who had such an easy smile and a light heart no longer existed. In his place was this cold, calculating monster. Was it possible that somewhere in there the old Jacob still existed and if he did, could I bring him out?

"Jake, you don't have to do this." I pleaded with him.

"Sure I do Bella." He seemed almost cheerful.

"You could bring me back. I'll convince my dad not to prosecute you."

"And your precious Edward?" He sneered. "Surely you don't think he'll be as agreeable even if you could convince Charlie, do you? If he's not already dead that is."

No, he wouldn't be. Edward would be in a rage, killing Jacob would be the foremost thought in his mind and nothing I could say would stop him. Not that I wanted to at this point.

"How long do you think you can keep me here Jacob?"

"For as long as it takes."

"As long as it takes for what, exactly?"

"For you to realize you love me and not that bloodsucker."

Love him? As if that could be ever be possible, especially now. All my pretenses of trying to bring out the old Jacob disappeared. "If you really love me as you claim to, you wouldn't be doing this. How could I love someone who had taken me from my home, Jacob? Someone who bashed me over the head and kidnapped me, taking me to only God knows where? Tell me Jacob, how could you think I could possible love you after this?"

Jacob POV

I shrugged. "For argument's sake, let's say you're right." I could tell I surprised her with my comment and she looked at me with distrust. If she didn't believe harm had come to the Cullens, I had to break her another way. Knowing Bella as I did, I knew she would care nothing for her physical safety. After all, this was a girl that dove off cliffs and rode motorcycles not so long ago. No, I needed to lay bare her insecurities. It wouldn't be that hard considering they were so blatantly obvious.

"I know I'm right." She claimed indignantly, her chin going up in a stubborn tilt.

"Well then this must get pretty tedious for your precious Edward."

"What gets tedious?" I could tell my statement confused her. Good.

"Saving you. I mean how much longer can he keep this up before it becomes boring, constantly bringing you back from the edge of death? I don't think he'll be able to do it much longer. In fact," I drawled getting ready to go in for the proverbial kill. "I'll bet that's why he abandoned you in the first place…he couldn't take being with such a weak human."

Bella's bottom lip trembled and I watched as tears started to spill from her eyes. Bullseye!

"No." She shook her head violently. "You're…you're wrong!"

"Am I? Am I really?...Think back to all those conversations we had when you could barely hold yourself together to even function. You had even said so yourself…you weren't good enough for him. He told you didn't belong in his world. He was right." I let the words sink in, saw the wheels turning in her mind as she mulled over what I had just told her. "And when he found out you didn't succeed in killing yourself like he thought, he felt obligated to take you back. I mean you tried to commit suicide over him, what was the guy supposed to do? He's just stringing you along now, pretending everything is great. Then he'll start dropping little hints when he feels your getting strong enough and when the time is right he will leave you again.

"So…what …I belong in your world? Is that what you're saying? If I am so damn pathetic why would _you_ want me?"

"But I do want you. I love you Bella. You _do_ belong in my world. You wouldn't have to change for me Bella, like you do for him. You could remain human, we could get married, give Charlie those grandkids he wants so badly. Your bloodsucker can't give you that Bella."

"I. Don't. Want. You. " She said fiercely, her hands clenching into fists causing her knuckles to whiten. "Even if you were right about Edward. Which you are _not._ I could _never_ love you."

Rage, swift and sure flowed through me at her words. I threw the knife I was whittling with to the ground and I watched pierce the earth inches from where Bella sat. She flinched and stared back at me with horror in her eyes. I didn't care. She wasn't listening to reason. My body started to tremble. I needed to calm down before I phased. In this close proximity to Bella, I couldn't risk it.

With a growl, I exited the confines of the tent which suddenly seemed suffocating. The wind blew hard flakes of snow at me. Instantly they melted as soon as coming in contact with my heated skin. I hadn't lied to Bella about the storm at least. The weather really was wicked out here. I couldn't even see 2 feet in front of my face which meant it was doubtful anyone else could if they somehow managed to figure out where we were.


	35. The Peril in the Mountain

Bella POV

Jacob's behavior was erratic and uncontrolled. One minute he was professing his love and the next he was trying to degrade me. His moods were giving me whiplash and I was sure that his sanity, what was left of it, was being stripped away at a fast pace. My time was limited, of that I was certain. I buried all thoughts that Edward could be dead, perished in his fury to find me. We were connected to each other. I knew…deep down to the very depths of my soul… I knew that if Edward were dead I would feel the loss immediately as if some intrinsic part of myself, the most significant part that belonged only to him would be ripped away leaving nothing but the bodily shell of myself behind. It was how I knew that Jacob had spoken falsely, out of desperation, trying to use my old insecurities against me.

"I. Don't. Want. You. "I told him feeling the fury of my words thunder within me. "Even if you were right about Edward. Which you are _not._ I could _never_ love you."

I watched cagily as he shook trying to quell the tremors of his body that had nothing to do with the freezing temperatures. The knife he was holding sunk into the ground by my leg so suddenly I flinched. He was on his feet so quickly it was unnerving. For the first time since I woke up, I felt dwarfed by his presence in the tent. He loomed over me breathing heavily, a warning in his eyes before he stalked out into the cold night air. His form casting an ominous shadow on the billowing walls of the tent.

I let out a breath of relief and redirected my focus to the weapon sticking out of the ground. Jacob in his anger, unwittingly left the means of my escape behind. Swiftly moving because I had no idea how long he would be gone, I maneuvered my body so my mouth hovered just over the hilt of the knife. With a quick prayer, I used my teeth to pull the knife from the hard ground, scrambled backwards to the sleeping bag and dropped the knife into my palms.

I bit back a curse as the knife sliced my finger when it landed. I couldn't think of that now. Focus Bella. I chastised internally. Angling the knife within the confines of my bound wrists proved to take some effort. Despite the ultra cold temperatures, beads of sweat gathered on my forehead as I positioned the knife and began to cut through the rope. My only hope at this point was that I didn't mutilate my hands in the process.

Edward POV

Something wasn't sitting right with me as the pieces tried to fit together in my head. We were missing something…something imperative to finding Bella. It hovered just out of reach but it was there. My family gathered behind me waiting for instruction of what to do next. Many of the searchers left the evening, opting to go home to their nice warm beds, thankful it wasn't their loved one they were looking for. We didn't have that luxury. There would be no rest for us, even if we did need it…not until Bella was back in my arms again.

"Charlie, let me see that list Jacob left behind." I demanded holding out my hand.

He shrugged. "Sure kid." He handed over the crumpled piece of paper with the wolf's child like scrawl. As I red down the list, it hit me. We were wasting our time. "Everything he stole points to a very cold destination." I said excited that I had figured it out. "He's not traveling on the ground. He's traveling up."

We all looked above us to the jagged mountains that loomed over the town. Charlie audibly gulped beside me.

"I hope to hell that you're wrong about this." He said but knew the truth of my words. "Mac," he called out to one of the deputies that hovered nearby. "Call for a chopper. We need to get on that mountain."

The deputy gave him an incredulous look. "Are you crazy Chief? No one is gonna fly up there. It's too risky. There's no visibility up there."

Unfortunately, he was right. Because of the storm any attempt of an air rescue would be delayed until the snow and wind let up. We didn't have that kind of time. With every passing moment, I could feel Bella slipping further and further away from me.

"Damn it." Charlie muttered. "Put one on call then. As soon as this godforsaken storm lightens up, I want to be ready."

"There is another way." I spoke softly. He turned to me understanding written in the eyes that were so much like Bella's I wanted to weep.

"You mean climb?" He shook his head sadly. "Son, we don't know if she's even up there"

"We don't know that she's not. I'm willing to take the risk, Charlie. Are you?" My anger was getting the better of me now. The human façade was weakening and all my predatory instincts were screaming at me to fight for survival and my survival was linked to Bella's.

"In case you haven't noticed, that whole ridge is unsurpassable."

Not to me, nor my family. "I'm an expert climber." I told him. "I could go."

_We could all go Edward. Let's bring Bella back home. _Emmett silently urged. He was getting restless with inactivity, his weight shifting from one leg to the next in anticipation of the next course of action.

Charlie looked horrified. _The fool kid would freeze to death before he made it halfway up that mountain_. I stared him down, commanding him with my eyes to see what I saw…that there was _no _other way. Charlie's mind was blank as he looked back at me, his face expressionless as he stood immobile and unresisting to my will.

_Son, you need to calm down._ Carlisle's soothing voice entered my head as he placed his hand on my shoulder. _You will be of no help to Bella if you inadvertently reveal yourself. _I looked down breaking my eye contact with Charlie, ashamed at myself for trying to "dazzle" Charlie into agreeing with me.

Momentarily stunned, Charlie didn't respond at first. But now that my mental hold was broken, he came back at me in a fury of words. "Are you freaking crazy? I'm not letting a civilian go up there, not on my watch. Not to mention how would I explain it to Bella if her fiancé gets killed trying to save her? Do you really want to put her through that?"

"Chief." A disembodied voice from deep in the darkness of the forest called. "I think I found something."

Before I could follow after Bella's father, Rosalie yanked me back.

"What do you think you're doing?" She demanded through clenched teeth. "You're going to blow our whole cover with antics like that."

I couldn't keep back the growl from my throat. I didn't want to. "Why are you still here?" I seethed, pissed that she would stop me and chastise me as if I were some young child. "You should go back to the house and gaze into one of your mirrors."

"Cut it out, Edward." Emmett spat in a harsh whisper. "She's been searching just as hard as the rest of us."

He was right of course. Rosalie hadn't stopped or complained once in her search for Bella, not even inside her own mind. I was letting my desperation and anguish distort my judgment. Not that any of it would matter if Bella didn't return to me.

"Shit, I'm sorry Rosalie." I apologized.

Jasper's phone rang, momentarily startling all of us. It was Alice, I knew by the ringtone.

"_You need to get to her right now." _I heard Alice screech through the receiver.

"Calm down Alice. What happened?" Jasper's voice was trying to be soothing but I heard the undercurrents of panic beneath his words. The panic that served to increase my own.

"_I can see her, Jazz. She manages to get away from him…a few hours from now I think. …and God that stupid dress I made her wear…she's so cold and she's hurt. He's chasing after her. I can't see…all the snow…but Jazz she will freeze to death if he doesn't get her first. Please Jazz you have to get her. Please. I can't lose my sister…not again."_

In all my years, I never heard Alice so frantic. The pain of her cries staggered me, made me weak.

"See if Alice knows where she is." I implored Jasper resisting the urge to grab the phone and ask her myself.

"Alice… honey calm down. I need you to tell me where she is."

"_On the mountain. Please. Tell Edward to hurry."_

Jasper hit the end button of the phone. When he looked up at me his eyes were as fierce and determined as I imagined my own were. "I suggest we find a way to convince Charlie. We're going up that mountain." He said.

"Hell yeah." Emmett replied. "Let's bring my baby sister back home."

Bella POV

Almost there, I thought as I sawed through the thick rope. The knife was sharp as I quickly found out after slipping a few times and cutting my own wrist. The rusty smell wafted up to my nose and I could almost tasted the coppery, metallic flavor as I watched the drops fall one by one onto the surface of the sleeping bag. Dizziness started to darken the edges of my vision, the side effect of my own weakness for the smell and sight of blood. No! I pushed down the nausea. If I was going to die, it wouldn't be because of this.

Jake was still outside probably seething. His shadow suggested that he sat just outside the tent and I could smell wood burning from a fire he must have lit. Some of the smoke leaked into the tent making my eyes water. At least he wasn't trying to torment me anymore. Or maybe he was just taking a breather, trying to come up with something even more insidious than what he's already done. Besides the head bashing, he hadn't tried to physically hurt me…yet. As volatile as he was, I didn't want to chance it. There were far worse things he could do to me. The mere thought made me slice harder into the rope.

With one last pull of the ropes I was free. Hurriedly, I untied the ropes on my ankles and valiantly fought against breaking into a victory dance. I may have won this battle but the war was still being fought. I was using the sleeping bag to apply pressure onto my wounded wrists when I noticed the fire outside going out.

Shit, he was coming back inside. I kept a tight grip on the knife as I sunk lower into the sleeping bag and prayed he wouldn't notice his knife wasn't where he left it. If I pretended to sleep, maybe he would leave me alone and just go to sleep himself. I concentrated on evening out my breathing. Sleeping people didn't breathe heavily in fear.

I felt his presence looming over me in the darkness as if he were trying to ascertain if I was really asleep. Finally with a heavy sigh, he sat down.

"Give me some credit, Bella. I know you're not really asleep."

I kept silent and as still as I could. Now that the adrenaline had worn from cutting through the ropes, the cold was starting to seep into my bones again. The heater in the tent provided little if any warmth against the below freezing temperatures.

"Okay, play it that way if you want." He said hunkering down a few feet from me. "I got all night and you're not going anywhere." He chuckled to himself.

Edward POV

Rosalie had opted to go back to the house to let the others know what we were planning, not that she needed to with Alice around but she had no desire to come with us and we really didn't need her any way. Her being there would look suspicious.

I heard Charlie's thoughts before I saw him as he was making his way back over to us. _Kid needs to get his eyes checked…mistaking a wolf print for a humans…idiot._

"It was nothing." He spoke out loud when he neared us. His expression turned from disgruntled to suspicious as he looked at us. We had agreed that Carlisle would do the convincing. It would sound more logical coming from a father to father approach than if I were to bring it up again. In truth, we did not need Charlie's permission at all. I fully intended to go up the mountain regardless of what Charlie had to say about it.

"Charlie." Carlisle spoke carefully putting a hand on Charlie's shoulder. Charlie was uncomfortable with that, knew my father was trying to soften him to whatever he was going to say next. He looked at my father's hand so casually placed and looked back at Carlisle direct in the eyes.

"I'm not going to like what you're going to say, am I?"

Carlisle actually grinned slightly. "It's not as ominous as all that. I just wanted to inform you that my sons and I have decided to head up the mountain to look for Bella."

_He's just as crazy as the rest of them. _Charlie shook of Carlisle's hand. "Don't you think I'd go up that damn mountain myself if I could? I am doing everything humanly possible to find my daughter, Carlisle but what you want to do, it's not possible. It's a damn death trap."

"We all know you're doing your best but my sons and I, well, we truly are expert hikers and have climbed more precarious mountains and in under more extreme weather conditions. Charlie, I love my sons. I would never allow them to make the attempt if I wasn't absolutely positive they would be successful."

"And I'm supposed to be okay with this?"

I wanted to tell him he didn't have a choice.

"It's the only place left to look. We've searched everywhere else and speaking as a doctor, I'm afraid the longer Bella stays up there, the more risk she is under, not just from Jacob Black but from hypothermia and frostbite, just to name a few." Carlisle paused for a dramatic sigh. "I consider Bella a daughter as well, not usurping your position, you understand, but I want to bring her back as much as you do. If we have the means and the capabilities, why not take advantage of them?"

I had to admit, Carlisle's argument was convincing even to a man as stubborn as Bella's father. Charlie's thoughts were warring with each other. He was desperate to get Bella back but his conscience was telling him not to put our family at risk. I couldn't stay silent any longer.

"We're not asking your permission Charlie. We _are_ going but out of respect we wanted to let you know."

Charlie gave me a steely look, his lips set in a grim line. "Then I'm going with you."

When I went to disagree, Carlisle stopped me with his thoughts. _We'll need him. His presence may be the only thing that will prevent an all out war and would keep suspicion off of us should Jacob not return alive._

I knew what Carlisle was saying was logical but it still left a sour taste in my mouth. Everything in me cried out for the death of that mongrel by my own hands and my father was taking that away from me. Emmett, on the other hand was more than ticked that Charlie wanted to come with us but even he questioned whether or not Charlie had the physical ability and strength it took for such a dangerous mission.

"You ever mountain climb, Charlie?" He asked.

My mind was invaded with memories of Charlie in his youth, an exuberant teenager to be sure, clumsily climbing the very mountain that loomed before us. "A long time ago." He shrugged. "Haven't done it since I was a kid and to be honest never in weather like this."

"No worries there. We'll harness you on my back and we'll get you up that way."

Charlie looked skeptical to say the least. "No offense kid but I don't think that's the best idea you ever head. "I'm heavier than I look." _All those damn steak and potato dinners, _he added in his mind.

Emmett grinned. "None taken but I'll tell you a secret." He lowered his voice to a whisper. "I can bench twice your weight and not break a sweat."

"Is he serious?" Charlie asked Carlisle.

"My son is very strong." My father agreed.

It was settled then. With Charlie piggy backing on Emmett, - I mentally reminded myself to get him a pair of snow goggles- he wouldn't be able to tell how fast we were going. Jasper insisted on coming along as well telling me that we might need his gift to calm the mutt down. It would be disastrous if he phased in front of Charlie, if he hadn't already phased. That particular thought brought a grief so intense it beckoned to steal what little composure I had left.

With hiking equipment donated by Mr. and Mrs. Newton from their store, we geared up – the only one actually needing it was Emmett who had Charlie secured in a harness on his back. Carlisle had his medical bag with him. We all prayed he wouldn't need it but Alice's earlier vision claimed otherwise.

Sam came running up to us as we were standing by the base of the mountain. "I'm coming too." _I may be the only one that can talk sense into him bloodsucker and you know it. _That may be true but he also wanted to make sure we didn't rip his former pack member to shreds.

"Fine" I told him through clenched teeth, "but I am not making any promises."

He nodded once. "I can live with that."

"Let's hope so." I said cryptically.

Sam didn't need the hiking gear anymore than we did but he put it on anyway. It was decided that he and I would go first, then Emmett with Charlie, Carlisle and finally Jasper.

"Thank you for doing this." Charlie spoke sincerely, his voice muffled through the thick scarf around his neck, as we started the treacherous climb.

It was Emmett that spoke. "Bella's my sister. Even if she's not blood related, she has always been part of this family."

Charlie cleared his throat uncomfortably. _I didn't realize how much I needed to hear that. I really have been too hard on the Cullen boy._

If I wasn't so worried for Bella's safety, I would have smiled. Charlie was having a change of heart.

Bella POV

I must have actually fallen asleep because the next thing I knew I was listening to Jacob's chainsaw like snoring reverberating through the small shelter. He was so deeply asleep, I knew I had no other choice but to act and to act quickly. With utmost care, I slid out of the confines of the sleeping bag, physically cringing at every whisper of noise, continuously glancing in his direction to make sure he didn't awake. There was no time to look for anything warmer to wear and I did the only thing I could do. I bundled myself up in the sleeping bag, gripped the knife I still had and tried to slowly and silently crawl out of the tent.

The opening I created while trying to slither out caused a burst of snowy wind to come inside. Shit! The disturbance of air was enough to wake Jacob up. I was out of time. His hand shot out and grabbed the sleeping bag. I scurried out from under it and stumbled through the tent opening. I felt a sudden unrelenting grip on my ankle as he tried to pull me back inside.

"Where do you think you're going Bella?" he asked, baring his teeth in a menacing smile.

"Away from you." I spat back as I tried to grip the hard ground with my fingernails and kicked out with my legs hoping to land my foot in his face.

"Stop fighting me Bella."

Never! I thought. I managed to kick away from him but as I stood up and started to run, he grabbed my ankle again. I fell forward, my already bad knee breaking the fall and bit my lip to keep from screaming. He was almost upon me now. I could feel his hot breath at the back of my neck.

Gripping tighter on the handle of the knife, I twisted around and plunged blindly. At his yelp of pain, I knew I had hit my mark. I pulled out and kept plunging, scooting further away as I did so. Blood spattered on my dress and across the snow but I was too afraid to let it affect me. I felt his hand loosen on my leg and he backhanded me across the face sending me flying. I saw stars when I landed but I knew if I succumbed to them all would be lost.

He hovered over me then, breathing heavily. "You won't get away from me that easily." He threatened with a snarl.

With as much strength as I could muster, my arm pulled back and I let it fly. With a sickening sound, the knife was embedded right by Jacob's eye.

Not waiting for him to recover, I ran into the shelter of the trees, ignoring the wind, ignoring the pain, ignoring the frigid air. _No matter what happens, Edward…always remember I love you._


	36. Hostage Negotiations

Edward POV

"You okay back there, Charlie." I heard Emmett shout over the roar of the wind. We were halfway up and moving way too slowly for vampires – for humans, we set a skyrocketing pace. I had the advantage of being first on the climb so I could move faster than the others but Carlisle insisted I temper my speed in the off chance that Charlie could see me through his snow covered protective eyewear.

"Fine, Emmett. Can't see shit but doing fine. We're moving kind of fast aren't we?"

"We caught some great ridges. It's making it easier to move up." Emmett explained, the lie rolling easily off his tongue.

_No matter what happens, Edward…always remember I love you._ Startled by the sound of Bella's voice in my head, I nearly stumbled and lost my foothold. Her voice echoed through me like a caress and I felt the warmth of it flow through my veins, eagerly ingesting it in like a starving man that was offered the most succulent of foods. It was the sweetest sound I had heard since Bella's disappearance.

So entranced with hearing the sound of her voice, _in my head_, at first I didn't think about the ramifications. As I tried to wrap my thoughts around it, a hard knot of panic in my chest grew swiftly. I glanced down at Carlisle to see if he heard it too. In his mind I heard no thoughts that conveyed he had heard her. Why? Why could I hear her, _now_, suddenly and like _this_? It was as if one of my fondest wishes had come true under the very worst of circumstances. It reminded me of the short story, "The Monkeys Paw" * that I had read many years ago. The words weren't audible in the traditional sense, they were in my head. Why did it sound like she was saying _goodbye_?

"No!" I growled pushing myself to move faster ignoring Carlisle's demands to slow down. He didn't realize the stakes had just gotten higher. _Don't give up, Bella. Don't you dare give up! I'm almost there._ I repeated the words, a frantic mantra in my brain willing her to hear me. _Please_, I begged.

No longer did I care about whether or not Charlie could see me as I raced up the mountain. Carlisle's worried thoughts barely registered as he followed. There was no time to respond. Sam, seeing me fly up the mountain, quickly followed. His thoughts were erratic, wondering what could be the cause of my sudden burst of speed.

As I reached the summit, my eyes scanned the frozen wasteland in front me be looking for any sign of inhabitants. Sam and Carlisle caught up, both flanking my sides for very different reasons.

"What's wrong, Edward?" Carlisle asked me. _You took off so fast._

"I heard her call to me." I explained stiffly, still searching the snow-covered silence.

"Heard who?" He was confused and rightly so. I was confused myself. "I didn't notice anything."

"Bella. I heard Bella."

_Interesting. _"What did she say?" Carlisle's mind was processing the information, quickly coming up with various theories.

"She told me, that no matter what happens to remember she loves me." My voice cracked in a sob, no longer able to bear the weight of the meaning behind her sweet verbal embrace. "Do you know what that could signify?"

"That we need to find her and quickly." _We will have more time to discuss the possible causes and implications of this later._

And just like that, he cut his mind off to me, refusing to reveal anything further and it scared the hell out of me.

Emmett, Charlie and Jasper joined us moments later. As Jasper helped Charlie down from Emmett's back, I prowled forward.

_Shit, Edward. One minute you were right there, the next you were like a cannonball. Where's the fire? _Emmett's thoughts were screaming at me.

Fire! That's it. My brain registered the scent of cold embers from burned wood not too far in the distance.

"This way" I pointed, running as fast as I could allow. So close…we were so close.

We arrived at the campsite and found it abandoned. As I got closer to it, it was obvious that there had been a struggle. Blood, both Bella's and the mongrel's stood out in bold relief against the pristine white of the snow it rested on.

"Jasper, keep back." I called out to my brother in warning.

"My son has a problem with the sight and smell of blood." Carlisle offered in way of an explanation to Charlie.

"Guess he and Bella belong to the same club." Charlie supplied. But Charlie wasn't doing so well with the sight of Bella's blood either. His faced was pale but I sensed in him a determined resolve. He examined the sight carefully as he would any crime scene.

He kneeled down observing the footprints and indentations in the snow using a high powered flashlight. "There was a struggle here" He pointed, aiming the beam of light across the snow and got up to follow the disturbing patterns in the snow. "There was another struggle here and it looks like she may have gotten away but he followed her…that way." He gestured towards the dense woods. "The fires old but the tracks look fresh enough. I don't think we're too far behind them."

I didn't wait, I ran trying desperately to ignore that the larger human prints had turned into wolf prints along the way. _I can't see you, Edward. Why can't I see you? _It was her voice again, calling out to me desperately. I'm right here; I wanted to shout to her.

Sam caught up to me, matching my stride. "He's phased." He sounded worried but it was no match for my own worry. His mate was safe at home.

"I'm aware of that fact, believe me." The echo of Bella's plea still reverberated through my head.

"I never thought he'd hurt her." He shook his head in confusion.

"Didn't you? " I seethed. "You need to be more aware of your own pack, Sam."

"Hey, I'm not the enemy here. I want to help Bella."

"But you want to help your mutt friend more." He wasn't fooling me. "I told you I am not making any promises and I meant it. As it looks now, I don't think I could keep one if I did."

I felt my whole body ignite in terror as I heard a high pitched scream…Bella's scream, quickly followed by an angry roar.

Bella POV

I climbed as far up the tree as I dared after running around in seamless circles trying to disguise the direction of my footprints in the snow. By now, I had imagined Jacob being so angry, he had phased into his wolf form using his heightened sense of smell to track me. Years ago I had learned that wolves couldn't climb trees, so here I sat on the highest branch I dared to get to. I huddled into the branches hoping they would offer some shelter from the bitter wind which sent stabbing flakes of wet snow cutting into my cheeks. My teeth were chattering so hard every living creature up here must hear them…if anything could actually live up here that is.

_Don't give up, Bella. Don't you dare give up! I'm almost there…please. _It was a frenetic plea.

Edward! It was Edward's voice coming to me just like my old hallucinations when I craved all things that gave me an adrenaline rush in my desperate need for Edward. They had resurfaced. But where were the images that were supposed to come with the voice. Why couldn't I see him? Was this some sort of sick joke played by fate? I actually was sitting here, most probably at death's door…I couldn't feel my body anymore…and I was only allowed half a hallucination?

It's not fair, I wanted to cry out. _I can't see you, Edward. Why can't I see you?_

"Gotcha!" Jacob called out, jumping into my line of vision as I stared at the forest floor. He was actually grinning maniacally as if he just won some perverse game of "hide and seek". "I told you, you wouldn't get away from me that easily."

His wounds that I inflicted had already begun to heal. Dried blood, the color of rust streaked down his face making it look like war paint. The eye I came close to with the knife was completely bloodshot now making him appear more twisted than ever.

I felt the stinging tears roll down my face. "My God…I don't even know you anymore."

"Sure you do Bella." He said cheerfully. "I'm still Jacob." And for only a split second I saw a glimpse of the old Jacob, the Jacob that was my friend until his features slipped until an evil mask once again.

"No." I shook my head. "The Jacob I knew wouldn't do this. The Jacob I knew was kind and compassionate. He joked with me and helped be rebuild motorcycles and taught me how to ride them. No…the Jacob I knew is dead." And God help me because it was the truth.

"Come down from the tree Bella." His voice turned commanding now. "Don't make me come get you."

I gripped the tree trunk tighter and looked down. It was a fifteen foot drop and I didn't think the chances of jumping and getting away unscathed were any good taking into account the injuries I already had but I had to try.

"Okay. If that's how you want to play it." He started to climb up the tree. When he was just about in arms reach of me, I pushed out and jumped, praying that the snow would help break my fall.

I landed with an oomph and the momentum of my jump caused me rolled down hill into a clearing. Without any thought, I limped-ran and stopped when I saw what was before me. I was at a dead end. In one direction, Jacob was coming for me in the other nothing but a cliff and the sky.

They say when you are about to die you see your life flash in front of your eyes but they never tell you if it's the life you led or the life you're _supposed_ to lead. Well, in that infinitesimal moment I saw both. Memories of my child hood mingled with the life I would have with Edward. And what a beautiful life it was. Until awareness came back to me once more.

I screamed just as I saw Jacob pounce on me with a roar. He landed on top of me throwing me to the ground so hard the wind was knocked out of me and I was grasping for breath. My frozen limbs started to tingle from the heat of his body pressed against mine. I struggled underneath his scorching body, kicking and punching but if he felt it, he gave no notice. He grabbed both of my damaged, bloodied wrists with hand and held them above my head.

"I should have thought of this before." He panted, his hot breath blowing in my face, his hips grinding into my thighs. "You can never be _his_, if you're already mine first."

"No!" I cried feebly as I saw his intent, my head flailing from side to side but I felt like I was drowning in something thick. Everything slowed down. I wanted my body to fight but I felt so weak and tired suddenly. No longer was I cold and I didn't know of it was from Jacob's heat or if something more dire was going on. His other hand made a grab for the bottom of my dress. I twisted my hips trying fervently to escape his probing hands.

"GET OFF OF HER!" The voice an angry, violent snarl but it was the most beautiful voice I ever heard.

Edward POV

The snow had all but abated entirely as Sam and I raced through the trees to where the sounds of struggle were coming from. The rest of our group weren't too far behind having heard the screams themselves but we would get there first. My mind envisioned all of the things that could cause Bella to scream like that and all of them sent stabs of pain through my once beating heart.

The trees gave way to a clearing and I saw them immediately; their bodies illuminated by the snow. Bella was struggling against Jacob, her face a picture of terror and his of maniacal glee. I halted in my tracks, hesitant to get too close for fear of what he might do. Even though all my instincts were shouting at me to kill the enemy, one false move and Bella could be lost to me forever.

"GET OFF OF HER!" I snarled, the words ripping through me as I clenched my fists at my side.

"Jacob!" Sam shouted simultaneously. "Stop this now!"

Jacob turned to us, a slow, evil smile spreading over his face. "Looks like the cavalry has come." He jumped up and grabbed Bella in a choke hold against him. She hung there like a ragdoll; her head would have lolled to the side if Jacob didn't have such a tight hold on her neck, most of the fight already gone out of her.

"Edward." She whispered my name ending in a gasp as Jacob tightened his grip on her. Her glazed eyes could barely focus on me.

"I'm here, love." I said unconsciously taking a step forward, quickly assessing her condition with my eyes. Her face was bruised, scratched and bloodied and her wrists had suffered much the same fate but it was her color that had me worried most of all. Some of her extremities had taken on a blue-gray color and her heart was laboring in it's fight to function. Clearly hypothermia had already begun to set in and if we didn't get her warmed up soon, she would die. Even Jacob's extreme body heat was only helping minimally.

"Not another inch, leech…you too Sam." Jacob demanded as he pulled out a revolver from his waistband and pointed it at his former friend. Shooting me would be useless and he knew that.

"Jacob, you don't want to do this." Sam said holding his hands up showing no intent to harm. "She needs help Jacob..even you can see that."

"Don't you dare tell me what she needs, traitor. She's fine. Right Bella, tell them you're fine."

He nuzzled her face with the gun in a caress and my insides clenched. Bell didn't respond.

"This isn't our way Jacob. We're supposed to preserve human life." Sam pleaded still trying to get the mutt to see reason. Couldn't he tell that Jacob was far beyond reason now?

"But I am preserving it, Sam. While you're aligning yourself with the enemy, I am preserving it."

I heard Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper and Charlie come up behind us. Carlisle's thoughts were screaming at me. _She needs a hospital…right now!_

_What the hell does he think he's doing with my sister _Emmett internally shouted.

"Welcome to the party gentleman. Sorry we can't stay long." Jacob laughed at his own joke. There was nothing in his mind that suggested, he was the slightest bit unnerved. It nearly made me physically ill at the hold he had around Bella. She had yet to say a word. It had me troubled, since she was usually the first one to say something.

I looked at Jasper, silently pleading for any assistance he could give.

_Already on it, Edward but he's fighting me. I think I can keep him from phasing though. And Bella is just numb._

We needed to get her out of here now. Desperation was clawing at me and I felt I could not maintain a calm façade much longer.

_Edward. Stop! Do not let your emotions override your logic. _Carlisle must have noticed the tension emanating off me as I debated on a method of attack. He was right, though. Any sudden move on my part could prove disastrous…for everyone.

_This ends now _was Charlie's determined thought as he took the safety off his own gun and aimed. "Put the gun down and let Bell go."

"You gonna shoot me, Charlie?"

The bastard was trying to act like his feelings were hurt. Charlie's hand wavered for a split second, then with a steely resolve held it firm once more.

"I'll do whatever it takes to bring my daughter home."

"Why? So she can marry _him_?" He nodded in my direction. "I won't let that happen."

"What about Billy, Jacob?" Sam pleaded. "You're all he has left. Don't do this to him."

"Shut up." Jacob shouted. "Don't bring my father into this."

"Bella needs medical attention." Carlisle's calm voice broke into the tension. "She'll die if she doesn't get it."

"You're one to talk about saving lives, doctor _leech_. Did you ever stop to think that I would rather see her die than be like him, like _you_?"

Jacob was coming dangerously close to revealing our secrets. So far, Charlie just thought Jacob's ramblings were that of a madman. I wasn't sure how long that would last however. Bella's condition was weakening and I didn't know how much longer _I _would be able to hold out without acting. Already, I noticed he was slowly backing up away from us towards the edge of the cliff. If I weren't so afraid Bella would be killed in any exchange between the wolf and I, I would have lunged after him before the others arrived.

Bella POV

Through the cold induced fog in my brain, I quietly observed the disturbing exchange noting that Edward's patience had reached the end of the line. There would be no favorable outcome, not this time. We were stuck at an impasse. Jacob wouldn't let me go and no one would act because they were afraid for me. This, I knew instinctively. Charlie still pointed the gun though looking for a clear shot. There was none. Jacob held me against him like a shield and I felt cold air wafting up and biting at me as we hovered too close to the cliff's edge.

Poor Charlie, I thought. It would kill him if he had to murder the son of his best friend even if it was to save my life. And Edward, he wouldn't survive my death…like I would never survive his. I had to create a diversion, at least do something to help them. If there was anytime I hated being a weak human, it was now.

_Be strong Bella. You can do this. _I repeated to myself as an idea came to me. Swallowing past the lump in my throat, I closed my eyes and used the only weapon I had; my teeth. I clamped down hard on Jacob's enormous arm, my bite like a pit bull and I felt immense satisfaction of hearing him howl in pain.

It all happened so quickly after that. I didn't realize I was going for the gun until I grabbed it from Jacob's loosened grip. The shouts and snarls behind me barely registered as Jacob and I struggle for the gun.

"Take the shot." I heard Jasper scream out and I didn't know if he was yelling at me or at Charlie.

Two gun shots rang out echoing loudly into the night. I smelled the acid burn of gun powder the same time I felt Jacob's body jerk backwards pulling me with him and I was falling.

"NOOOO!" Edward's screaming denial was the last sound I heard.

A/N – Another cliff hanger!…don't worry I'll update soon!

*"The Monkeys Paw" by W.W. Jacobs (1902) - The story is based on the famous "setup" in which three wishes are granted. In the story, the paw of a dead monkey is a talisman that grants its possessor three wishes, but the wishes come with an enormous price for interfering with fate.


	37. Rescue Ops

Edward POV

At first I couldn't believe what I was seeing as Bella bit down hard on Jacob's arm. Before I could even spring into action, they were in a face-off grappling for the gun. Distantly, I heard Jasper scream at Charlie desperately to take the shot. I wanted to tell him not to, Bella was not quite out of the way but I couldn't make my voice function in my fear.

Two gunshots went off nearly simultaneously then and the sound jolted me as if I was the one that had been shot. Jacob's body jerked backwards as the bullets slammed into him. It all seemed to happen in fast forward and slow motion at the same time as I watched helplessly as Bella was pulled over the edge with Jacob.

"Noooo!" I screamed running forward, stopping myself at the rim. I couldn't bring myself to look…didn't want to see Bella's broken and bloodied body lying on the ground way below me. Grief bubbled over and spilled forth as I sunk to my knees, curling my fingers in the snow, sobs ripping through me violently. I was too far gone; suffocating…drowning in my anguish that I barely noticed Charlie on his knees beside me.

"Thank God, Oh thank God." Charlie's breaking voice breached through my wall of sorrow. Why would he be thanking God…unless?

Taking a deep breath, trying not to let my hopes get too high for fear they would plummet, I peered over the chasm, bracing myself for what I would see. Bella and Jacob lay on another ledge about 10 feet below the one we were on. It looked like she had landed on top of him thus breaking her fall. As I examined more closely, I noticed the shallow rise and fall of her chest. She was alive! I rejoiced as I heard the distinct sound of her heartbeat, the only heartbeat. It was labored and weak but it was there.

Controlled chaos ensued quickly after that with Carlisle barking out frenzied orders.

"Jasper, I need you to run back to the tent and get the sleeping bag. Charlie, radio in for a MedEvac. The storm has quieted. They should be able to get one up here. Emmett, give me the harness and some rope. Edward, I need you to go down there and put Bella in the harness to so we can lift her up." _Gently, son. I do not know how badly she has been hurt._

With harness in hand and not a care to what Charlie would think, I jumped onto the lower ledge, landing next to Bella. She was lying face down, on top of Jacob. Most of the blood on her was his. He had been shot straight through the heart; a fitting end I supposed. I slowly turned her over, careful not to jar her any more than necessary before carefully placing her onto the harness. She was unconscious, her pallor nearly gray and translucent and I had nothing but the sound of her heart to give me solace. I felt the familiar burn of venom rise through my throat when I smelled the blood but it was nothing but a mere annoyance. My whole being shied away from anything that could cause her harm.

"Edward." She whispered in the barest of breath, her eyes remaining closed. "So c…c…c…cold"

"Shh, my love. Save your strength." I calmed, smoothing the hair from her face. It had dried tackily to her head by blood from her head wound. She went still once more fading back into oblivion as her heart stuttered and regained it's slow, unhealthy rhythm. It took every ounce of restraint I had not to change here right then and there and be damned with the consequences. Hell, I was already damned. What was one more make against my blackened soul. If it meant my love would live, it would be worth it. It was only until Carlisle's voice broke into my consciousness that I could tear away from the thought.

"Is she ready?" He asked.

"Take her up." I replied and with a tender kiss to her brow, I followed the harness back up the side of the cliff, keeping it steady in my grasp.

Jasper was already there waiting with the sleeping bag. Carlisle gave her a cursory exam before she was covered up. As he catalogued her injuries in his head, I felt myself tremble and shake in my helplessness.

_Concussion, Scalp lacerations, wrist lacerations, Contusions around the neck and wrists, re-torn knee ligament, two cracked ribs, possible ankle sprain, need tests to confirm internal bleeding…_

"Carlisle" I groaned pleadingly when I couldn't take anymore.

"Her injuries are severe." He said with a sigh "but I don't believe life threatening. What worries me most is the hypothermia. If her body temperature falls below 82.4 degrees , she could suffer coma or cardiac arrest. She's perilously close to that now."

He wrapped her up tightly in the sleeping bag and shook his head in concern. _This wont do. The blanket is too cold from sitting out to do any good. I wonder…_"Sam, can you sit with Bella. You have the highest natural body temperature. It will help tremendously."

"Sure." He said already taking a position beside Bella. I couldn't help but be jealous that it was him providing warmth and not me. I was too afraid to even hold her hand for fear that my chilling temperature would send her spiraling into the cardiac arrest that Carlisle feared was nearly eminent. Sam's thought were chaotic, flitting from deep sorrow at the loss of a friend to unrelenting anger at Jacob and even himself for the events that occurred. He was resolved to do anything that could help. I began to respect him in those few moments.

"Is she going to be okay, doc?" Charlie asked swallowing past the lump in his throat at the sight of his daughter looking so pale and lifeless.

"As long as we get her medical attention soon, she should be fine. I've brought my medical bag but what's in there will only help with the superficial wounds. My main concern at the moment is keeping her warm."

Charlie had the forethought to call for two helicopters; one the MedEvac to take Bella to the hospital and one to take the rest of us off the mountain. It was decided that I would ride along with Bella, Carlisle and Charlie while the other took Emmett, Jasper and Sam. Sam decided he would be the one to tell Billy about Jacob so Charlie could concentrate on Bella. Jacob's body would have to unfortunately ride with us so he could be delivered to the coroner's office in the morgue of the hospital. Even in death, I didn't want him anywhere near my Bella.

It wasn't any surprise that Esme, Alice and Rosalie were waiting for us at the hospital when we arrived. All of them turned to me with concerned looks in their eyes when they noticed my slow approach. Most of my mind was down the hall where Bella had been rushed to be examined more carefully.

"Edward. What happened? I could only see you coming here." Alice said jumping up from her seat.

"Jacob's dead." I said, my voice flat; disguising the turbulent emotions that lie underneath. "Bella killed him."

"Oh, dear." Esme gasped. _Poor Bella._ "Where _is _Bella, Edward?" Worry for her new daughter clear by the telltale tremble of her chin.

"Carlisle is examining her now. I won't lie to you all…she's hurt…very badly." I just barely managed to get the words out, my voice breaking.

"She'll be fine, Edward. I promise." Alice tried to comfort me.

I was only marginally relieved. My main concern wasn't what would be but what was. And right now, Bella was suffering.

"Did he…you know…?" _He didn't rape her did he? _Rosalie's horrified words and thoughts slammed into me hard, nearly staggering me. It was something I never allowed myself to think for I knew if it ever entered my mind, my sanity would be completely lost. Now that Rosalie posed the question, I had to force myself to reflect back to when I first saw Bella struggling under Jacob on the snow.

I shook my head. "I think…I mean… he tried…but I…" I couldn't finish. If that were the case, I'd want to bring him back to life just so I could have the pleasure of killing him all over again…and it wouldn't be quick like the first time around.

"I'm sure Carlisle would be able to tell us more." Esme said placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Try not to dwell on what you don't know for sure."

"Esme's right, Edward. It will only tear you apart." Rosalie agreed. _You need to be strong for her…she will need that more than anything and I can help to…if she'll let me. _I truly did not expect Rosalie's kindness or compassion for Bella but I was grateful for it. Her own suffering at the hands of her old fiancé and his friends obviously gave her a common bond with Bella now. As a consolation, it was weak.

Alice was looking into the distance, hey eyes glazed over not looking at anything in particular then she turned to me and smiled. "No, Edward. I don't believe he did. I would have seen evidence of that when I looked into her future just now." The future she just hid from me…just in case.

Charlie, after filling out the necessary admittance paperwork came to join us to wait for Carlisle's news. Emmett and Jasper arrived soon after as well as Sam and Billy who arrived separately.

My eye was on the old Indian in the wheel chair. His face seemed to have aged drastically since I last saw him, the lines in his weathered face deeper. His black eyes stared at me, not in anger or censure but in remorse and sorrow. _We have all paid greatly this day with our blindness and still have much to atone for._

Emmett and Jasper on the other hand looked as restless as caged animals as soon as they spotted Billy Black. They did not know his thoughts as I did.

_He better not be here to cause trouble…dead mutt or not. _Emmett's thoughts as well as his tension fused body language stating he was itching for a fight as well as any words could have. But there would be no fight, not now and maybe not ever if I was reading the older man correctly.

It was Charlie, pale and haggard, that approached Billy Black. _How do you apologize to your best friend for shooting his son? _Charlie grappled with the words in his brain but none of them seemed to convey what he felt. Charlie, on fact did not deal the death blow to Jacob Black; only succeeding in hitting him in the arm. It was Bella that shot him through the heart with his own gun; an act that I still felt the terror from. It could have all gone so wrong, I thought. It could have been Bella.

Charlie sighed deeply and wiped his face with his hand. We were all curious to see how this played out.

"Sam told me what happened." Billy said with regret in his voice.

"Billy, I…" Charlie started, guilt and shame evident in his voice and body language but Billy quickly interrupted him.

"Don't Charlie." He held up his hand. "You are not only my best friend but you are also a good man, an honest man and I owe you honesty in return. You did what you had to do to save your daughter. My biggest regret is that I didn't do what I should have done to save my son." At Charlie's confused expression, he explained. "We…I…" he glanced at Sam. "didn't see how deep and dark Jacob's obsession had gone with Bella." He paused and sighed. "Maybe I _did_ see it…I don't know… but I chose to deny it…and that is _my_ albatross to wear, not yours and not Bella's. She made a choice" – he shuddered – "and instead of accepting that choice, no matter how much he disagreed with it…Jacob chose as well. He chose to spiral deeper into madness."

Charlie looked at the floor, his face reddening. "If that is the case, Billy than part of the blame rests on me as well. I encouraged Jacob in his pursuit of Bella…even after Edward returned." He looked at me apologetically, fearing what I would have to say to his admission. I remained silent, however. I already knew he did that and as much as I wanted to, I couldn't fault him for it…not 100% anyway. He had thought I was no good for Bella. It was the bitterest of ironies that I had left her because I thought the exact same only for her to seek refuge in a friendship with a monster that proved to be more dangerous than I.

"No, Charlie." Billy denied. "You had no way of knowing. No fault lies with you."

While I understood where both parties were coming from I couldn't accept the fact that no one was putting the blame where it really belonged; on the shoulders of that mongrel that lay dead on a cold slab in the morgue. I kept my opinions to myself; it would serve no good to voice them here.

An hour later the ER was filled to capacity with people all asking about Bella's condition. Most of them felt they were entitled to it, as if they had some personal stake in Bella's life because they had helped search for her. I couldn't afford to be ungracious, however. No matter what the cost was to me, I answered their questions as politely and patiently as I could before it all became too much. I needed to get out of there; away from their thoughts and most especially their mindless chattering gossip. Of course they had no idea that I could hear even their most discreet whisperings.

I stalked down the hall in search of Carlisle in the hopes that he would have some news to tell. Carlisle exited one of the doors, closing it quietly behind him.

"I heard you coming." He explained.

I didn't engage in any preliminaries. "How is she?" I asked.

He sighed. "She's still unconscious and perhaps that is for the best right now. I gave her a CT scan to check for any internal hemorrhaging and thankfully there was none. Believe it or not, by her landing on Jacob and not the ground, it probably saved her life. We are working on getting her body temperature up and so far our methods are proving slow but successful. Her heart rate is being monitored closely as her heart is not functioning as well as I'd like it to at this point. Hopefully will be back to normal soon. She is currently being cleaned and readied to be transported to a private room. Once she is there she will be allowed visitors."

Most of the information was good news but there was still one question I had to ask. "Carlisle, I need to know…was Bella…was she raped?" The venom burned in my throat and I tried to swallow past it as I asked the question physically bracing myself for the answer.

Carlisle's look was sympathetic. He knew how hard it was for me to ask. "No, son. She wasn't. "

Some of the tension left my muscles and I released the breath I didn't realize I was holding. "Thank God." I buried my face in my hands briefly before scrubbing them up my face to push back my hair.

"Edward. I am very proud of you son. Once again you astound me with your remarkable restraint where Bella's blood is concerned." The comment came out of nowhere and surprised me at first.

"It's not restraint, Carlisle." I told him in all seriousness. "It's love."

He smiled warmly. "Yes…yes I suppose it is." He patted me on the back, a gesture he hadn't done in a very long time. "Now do me a favor and bring Charlie back here. I need to give him the update on Bella's condition."

Bella POV

_Beep…beep…beep. _Stupid alarm clock, I thought as I blindly reached over to slam down on it. A cold hand grasped my wrist, stopping me. I slowly opened my eyes to stare into Edward's near black ones. He had purple smudges under his eyes and his bronze hair looked like he had run his fingers through it many times. I looked down at myself to see the all too familiar site of hospital attire at the same time I became aware of an IV needle in my arm and oxygen tubes in my nose.

"That's not my alarm clock, is it?" I asked still hoping I was hallucinating.

"No."

'It's heart monitor, isn't it?" At my disgruntled tone he nodded his head, a hint of smile ghosting his lips. "I was afraid you were going to say that." I closed my eyes again trying to recall exactly what happened to me to be in here again. I should be paying rent at this point. My breath hitched until I was nearly panting and I heard the monitor speed up as the events came back in vivid color. Jacob…_Oh God_…Did I kill him? He attacked me and I _shot_ him…there was a cliff…a fall…I thought I was dead.

"Bella?" Edward asked frantic already moving. "Should I call Carlisle?"

"No. Please stay. It's…well…I just remembered. That's all."

He sat back down again absently stroking patterns on my arm, soothing me. The monitor went back to sounding off a steady rhythm.

"How do you feel?" he asked.

I took a slow inventory, noting my bandaged wrists and braced knee, the various bruises on my arms, I felt the bandage on my head. "Hmm, not as bad as I thought I would."

"It must be the morphine drip." He supplied.

"Remind me to thank Carlisle for that."

As conversations between the two of us usually went, this one seemed strained and awkward…too superficial considering what preceded it. There was much more underneath that wasn't being said, which was fine by me. I wasn't ready to launch into a narrative about what happened. My brain was still foggy…from the head injury or the drugs I didn't know.

"Where's Charlie?" I asked looking around the room.

"Carlisle convinced him to get some dinner. It's 6pm…you've been unconscious for nearly 15 hours." And Edward had been here for all of them, I thought.

"And Ja…" I couldn't finish his name but I had to know what I did."

"He's dead." Edward said,his eyes and voice flat.

I could feel my eyes widen as I gripped Edward's sleeve in desperation. "Please say it was me that killed him and not Charlie." The heart monitors went crazy again sending a nurse rushing into the room to check.

"Ms. Swan. It's good to see you're awake. Are you alright? Are you in any pain?"

"She's fine." Edward answered for me. "She just remembered what happened. Can you page my father? I am sure he would like to examine Bella himself."

"Right away Mr. Cullen." She said and walked out of the room.

"You need to calm down, love. It's not healthy to get so worked up." His fingers continued their soothing caress.

"You didn't answer my question, Edward."

He sighed. "Yes, Bella. It was you." He stiffened then and a his eyes suddenly looked haunted. "Of all the stupid…idiotic…why Bella? Why would you risk yourself like that?" – He started to speak quickly as he usually did when he was agitated and I had to focus hard to keep up. "When I saw your intent…what you did and I could do _nothing_…nothing but standby and watch helplessly. You nearly gave me a heart attack…not an easy thing to do, that. And when I saw you fall off the cliff. I never experienced such gut wrenching pain. Why would you do that Bella…why?" His hands trembling hand clenched into fists as he brought them to cover his face.

I couldn't stop myself from wincing. If he was trying to make me feel guilty he was doing a commendable job. It killed me to see him so anguished but there had been no other way at the time.

"I had no other choice." I whispered.

His head came up swiftly, dark torment turning to confusion. "Explain that, please."

I never got the chance because that was the moment that Carlisle came into the room, his smile fading as he saw the expressions on our faces.


	38. Aftermath Part One

Edward POV

"I had no other choice." She whispered.

_No other choice, no other choice, no other choice_…the words reverberated through my head like an echo across an endless sea of space. But she _did _have a choice. As soon as the mongrel had let her go after she bit him, she could have run away…let Charlie take the shot. She didn't. _No other choice…_I felt disjointed...confused by her words. _No other choice…_Why?

I raised my head to look at her. "Explain that, please."

The answer never came. Carlisle chose that inopportune time to come into the room, his eyes as well as his mind full of censure…all of it aimed at me.

_Edward! I understand why you're upset but now is not the time. _"Bella, how is my favorite patient?" he asked her with a smile.

"I've felt better." She admitted disgruntled as she nervously plucked her bed sheets with her fingers, casting a sideways glance at me.

I felt instantly remorseful for my tirade. After expecting to her something entirely different…something that perhaps would make some sort of sense even if it was tinged with Bella's convoluted logic, her actual answer took threw me off balance. _No other choice._ The words taunted me.

"Edward, why don't you tell your brothers and sisters that Bella is awake? I am sure they'll be happy to hear the good news." _I would like to examine Bella now. _

I nodded but what I really wanted to do was stay. This would be the first time I left her side since she had been given a room and I wasn't sure if I could bear the separation again. Logically, I knew she would be fine in my father's capable hands but emotionally, even the smallest of distances caused anxiety. Could vampires suffer panic attacks? Apparently they could.

I squeezed Bella's hand and kissed her brow. "I'll be back soon." I assured her.

But I didn't go to my family. Knowing Alice, she would be aware of the moment Bella awakened down to the second now that the wolves were no longer hanging around. No, I was compelled elsewhere. Cautiously, I made my way down the stairs to the basement entering the morgue area. There was no one around, thankfully to stop my entrance.

The unpleasant smell of formaldehyde and antiseptic permeated the air. A few bodies covered in blue sheets were lined up inside the room, not yet placed into the metal drawers inside the wall. I knew Jacob's body was among them, waiting to be autopsied. Quickly, I checked the toe tags finally stopping at the one that was marked "Black, Jacob". I flipped down the sheet so that his face was revealed to me. His eyes were closed and his mouth not yet sewn up, nor was his body exsanguinated and replaced with embalming fluid. I could still smell his tainted blood. Instead of it being any temptation, I was sickened by the odor; of both his blood and the wolf stench he retained even in death.

"You lose, Jacob Black." I spoke harshly to the silent corpse. "You tried to take away from me the sole meaning of my existence, the one thing that keeps me tethered to this earth and you _failed_. But make no mistake" – my teeth clenched together as I felt the rage rising in me again – "Had you succeeded, _nothing _would stop me from reaping my vengeance. Even in death, I _would_ find you."

My breath came in rasps as I tried to calm the monster in me. He was dead, I repeated to myself. He couldn't hurt Bella anymore. I didn't bother to place the sheet back over his head before I walked away. It felt like too reverent an act to me and he wasn't deserving of that type of respect from anyone, least of all me.

Alice met me outside of the stairwell doors on the floor Bella was on. Her sympathetic look conveyed to me more than words could that she knew where I just came from.

"Did it help?" she asked, her eyes looking at me sorrowfully. For some reason, I couldn't bear her compassion, not when the monster was still so close to the surface, not when the monster in me felt cheated out of killing the dog and…the man (if I could apply that term to myself) felt everything to the point that he was near numb. It was a good thing Jasper was not near, the emotions I was feeling would break him.

"No" I said flatly, shouldering past her. But Alice wasn't letting me go that easily. She kept pace with me as I walked back towards Bella's room.

"Carlisle is still examining her." _You weren't gone that long, Edward. _I could almost hear her eyes rolling.

"It doesn't matter." I told her as I continued my progression down the hall. Nothing mattered but me being with Bella.

"Edward!...Edward stop." It was the pleading in Alice's tone that caused me to halt and turn to face her. "You can't see her…not when you're like this."

"Why? Have your visions told you something?" I asked feeling less than polite.

"No. Call it plain old fashioned women's intuition. I don't need Jasper to tell me your emotions are all over the place and the last thing you want to do is to let the wrong one out…especially in front of Bella. She may get the wrong idea."

"So what are you suggesting then, Alice?"

"Come…sit with the family for awhile. Calm down…then go to Bella. I _know_ it's hard for you to be separated from her right now…but trust me on this…_please_."

I sighed, shoving my hands through my hair. Alice was right. Bella would take one look at me and assume that whatever I was feeling was her fault. On top of everything, I couldn't add to her already significant burden.

"Everyone's still here?" I asked her surprised, not expecting they would endure the wait for Bella to wake with me.

"Well…we _did_ go home at one point…for appearance's sake more than anything else but when I knew when Bella was going to regain consciousness, we came back. You're not the only one that loves her, ya know…even Rosalie does in her own way."

"I know, Alice, I know."

Yes, I did know that. I had realized as much when I had ignorantly made the decision for the whole family to leave Forks all those months ago and they rallied against me even as they complied with my wishes…all except for Rose. It was one of the reasons I couldn't stay with them after we left; hearing the accusations in their minds, enduring the pitying looks, listening to the pleading to go back. It was too maddening to endure. So I had taken the easy way out and I left them behind as well, only to wallow alone in my own self pity and dark torment.

Bella POV

"I'd like to apologize for Edward's behavior." Carlisle said as he began to check me over. "He hasn't been handling this well."

"I know." The truth was I didn't even know how I was handling it either. But then again I really had just woken up so maybe the full effect didn't hit me yet or the painkillers were numbing my brain as well as my body.

"Everything looks good so far." He said as he marked my chart. "Your body temperature has increased to a normal 98.6 degrees but I am going to recommend keeping you here for a few days to monitor you for any symptoms of pneumonia."

"Pneumonia?" I parroted.

"With the onset of hypothermia, your immune system was compromised and unfortunately the chances of pneumonia increased drastically. So, I want you let me know immediately if you feel any tightness in your chest or if you get the slightest cough…I don't care of you think it's just a tickle in the throat. I want to know about it. I'm also going to let the nurses know to check you at regular intervals for any increase in body temperature although I am sure Edward would be more than happy to handle that job."

Great, I thought. From one extreme to another. And yet another thing for Edward to worry about. "And the oxygen, do I still need it?" I asked with a grimace, pointing at the uncomfortable tubing in my nose.

"It's actually not oxygen but heated air to go direct into your system to bring your temperature up. The IV has re-warming fluids as well. I believe we can take these out now."

At least I'd feel less like a science experiment and more like myself with only the morphine drip going into me. I squeezed my eyes shut as Carlisle took some of the tubing from my arms. Going in or coming out, I hated needles.

I heard Carlisle's amused chuckle. "Go ahead say it" I joked, opening my eyes when he was done. He was shaking his head bewilderedly. "You can't believe after everything that I am still afraid of needles."

"That pretty much sums it up." He said with a quirk of his lips. He turned his head towards the door. "Ahh, I can hear Esme and your mother coming down the hall. She is quite anxious to see you."

Knowing Renee's propensity to over-react, I wasn't sure "anxious" was the proper term to use.

"I'll let you and your mother have some privacy." He paused, an uncomfortable expression passing over his features and he gave me sympathetic look that had me very nervous.

"Carlisle?" I questioned. "What's wrong?"

He shook his head and gave me a small smile. "Sorry, I forgot how perceptive you are. It's nothing terrible, really. It's just that now you are awake and coherent, I am sure the police will want to talk to you about what happened. I can hold them off if you like…tell them you're not up to it yet."

The offer was tempting, I couldn't deny it. But did I really want to delay the inevitable? "It's fine. I'd rather get it over with so I can get on with my life." A terrifying thought occurred to me that made my heart nearly stop. "You don't think I'll be arrested for murder?"

Carlisle looked shocked that I would even think that. "No, of course not, Bella. Why would you even say that?"

"I shot him…I killed Jacob." My hands fisted in the bed sheets as I tried to control my ragged breathing. The effects hadn't hit me before but they were certainly doing a number on me now.

"Bella. Calm down. No one is arresting you…not for self defense. There were six people including your father there when it happened. We all gave our statements attesting to the fact that his intent was clear to kill you and you were defending yourself. Plus, your father's colleagues are the ones conducting the investigation. No one is putting you in jail, Bella."

I relaxed visibly at that just as Renee entered the room with Esme. Judging by the initial look of shock my mother gave me, I was glad I hadn't thought to ask for a mirror. I must look a lot worse than I thought.

"Mom." I didn't know how happy I'd be to see Renee until that exact moment. She ran to the bed and stopped abruptly.

"Oh, Bella." She said, her chin trembling. "I want to snatch you up in a big hug but I'm terrified to hurt you."

"I look that bad, huh?"

"No, baby you're beautiful." She said opting to grasp my hand instead while her other hand smoothed my cheek.

"We'll come by later." Esme said quietly with a wink at me as she and Carlisle left the room.

Renee sat down on the side of the bed, careful not to jostle it too much. "Now, tell Momma all about it." She said. I almost laughed at the ordinary statement used for such an extraordinary circumstance. It was the same phrase she always used whenever something happened, whether I had a skinned knee; which happened quite often or a bad day in school or any type of problem any normal teenage girl would have. The funny thing was with a vampire as a fiancé and an attacker that was a werewolf, I was not a normal teenager.

Renee, it seemed was in full maternal mode and for the first time in a long time I was grateful for it. She always tried to be my friend and more often than not, I actually felt like the parent but in times like this, when it really counted, she was just my mom.

I gave Renee the Readers Digest version of what happened, knowing full well she was too fragile to be able to handle the gory details. I couldn't leave out the fact that I killed Jacob. She would find out about it anyway from someone else.

"If I had just come here for your graduation, this would have never happened." Renee lamented, her feelings of guilt clearly showing in her eyes.

"No, mom." I tried to assuage her. "It may not have happened yesterday but it still would have happened. It seems he was planning this for some time." That much I had gotten from Jacob, himself.

"I'm just so glad he won't be bothering you anymore." Renee said smoothing the sheets around me.

"So, what do you think of Esme?" I asked wanting to change the subject. I knew at any moment the police would show up to question me and I needed to take a break from thinking about Jacob just for a little while before launching into it again.

Judging by the expression on Renee's face, I could tell she was momentarily stunned by the question before her face relaxed into a smile. "She's just lovely. I couldn't have asked for a nicer mother-in-law for you" – she shook her head. – "Listen to me…mother-in-law?…it makes me feel so old."

"You're not old mom." I reassured her. "She is great though, isn't she?"

"She was so worried about you. Just like she would be if you were her own daughter. It made me a little jealous actually…but I feel better about this whole marriage thing knowing you're going to be well cared for by Edward's family. And Edward…"she chuckled briefly. "He obviously thinks the world of you. Esme told me he hasn't left hospital since they took you in. Just like last time." She finished with a sad smile.

I cringed a little knowing she was talking about the time in Phoenix last spring when I was attacked by James.

Over Renee's shoulder I could see two policemen hovering in the doorway of my room. I knew it was time to give my statement. Swallowing past the sudden lump in my throat, I beckoned them in.

"Sorry for interrupting, Ms. Swan but we'd like to get your report on the incident so we can wrap up our investigation." One of them said apologetically as he walked in the room. I recognized them both from my brief visits at the police station. My dad, I knew wouldn't be allowed to take my statement for a variable of reasons, not the least of which being that I was his daughter and he was personally involved.

I slowly moved into a sitting position. "No. It's okay." I told them as I grimaced from the sudden twinge of pain throughout my body.

"Would you like me to get Edward?" Renee asked me. "I'm sure he'd like to be here."

I nodded. Selfishly, I wanted him with me though I could imagine what cost it would be to his self control for him to hear what happened prior to him showing up.

Renee didn't have to move far. Edward strode purposefully in the room taking the seat beside my bed, automatically taking my hand in his and bringing it to his lips. The two officers glanced at each other uncomfortably.

"I trust my being here won't be a problem." Edward looked at them with a steel glint in his butterscotch eyes almost daring them to argue with him.

"Uh, no…Mr. Cullen…that's…that's fine." One of them stammered out.

He nodded resolutely and turned to me. "I needed to be here." He explained. I didn't question him because as much as I hated to admit it to myself, I needed him here too.


	39. Aftermath Part Two

A/N - Sorry for the long delay but I have been swamped lately and could not find as much time for writing as I would have liked. That being said, I hope you enjoy this latest installment.

Edward POV

Charlie was sitting with the rest of my family as Alice and I walked into the small waiting area on Bella's floor. He must have noticed my frazzled appearance because he immediately stood up. The action didn't surprise me really after all this was the room people waited in terrifying limbo to see if their loved one would live or die.

"Edward, Is it Bella? Is something wrong" he asked frantically.

I tried to smile to allay his fears but it just felt like my face was twisting in an unnatural position. "She's fine Charlie. She's up and downplaying everything." I told him. I didn't see the purpose in mentioning that I could literally feel the pain she tried to hide from me every time she moved, every time she took a breath. He would find out soon enough now that she was awake. At least while she was unconscious from anesthesia we could all pretend however naively that she hadn't been almost at the brink of death…beyond the reach of even the most sophisticated of medical practices.

"Yeah…that sounds like Bella." He said with a half smile.

"Renee is with her now." Alice chirped in beside me trying in a futile attempt to squelch some of the overwhelming tension in the waiting room.

"Good." He swallowed hard, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. "That's good. She needs her mother right now." He looked around towards the rest of my family suddenly uncomfortable. His mind was a jumble of thoughts. "Uh Edward…can I have a word in private?"

"Sure Charlie." I said motioning for him to walk with me. I could hear my family's questioning thoughts as we made our way slowly down the hall. "What's on your mind?" I asked him.

"About what I said to Billy earlier…about encouraging Jacob. I'm sorry Edward. It's just that he always seemed like a good kid and you…well you had broken her heart." I winced at his disjointed memories of a near catatonic Bella. "If I knew…I wouldn't have..."

"You couldn't have known." I replied taking pity on him. "You only saw what Jacob wanted you to see."

"But _you _knew." It wasn't a question. When I faced him, I could see the muscle ticking in his jaw, a sign of his annoyance at himself.

I nodded once. "Yes, Charlie. I knew." My eyes never wavered from his. I wouldn't lie to him. Not now. There was already enough deceit between us.

His face flushed and he turned away silently berating himself for being so blind. I heard Carlisle before I saw him and Esme round the corner. "_The police are about to question her, son. I know you will want to be there."_

"If you will excuse me?" I said to no one in particular as I walked swiftly towards Bella's room.

I strode purposefully in the room taking the seat beside her bed, reaching and taking her hand in mine as I brought it to my lips. She still looked paler than usual and I could detect the tightening of muscles around her eyes sending a silent message that she was still in pain. Discreetly, I pressed the button for the morphine drip to allow a little more into her system.

It was only until I ensured her comfort that my focus drifted to the two officers as they glanced at each other uncomfortably.

_Is he even allowed to be in here? He was a witness. _I heard the questioning thoughts of the taller of the two.

"I trust my being here won't be a problem." I looked at them directly, daring them with my eyes to refuse me.

"Uh, no…Mr. Cullen…that's…that's fine." The shorter one of them stammered out.

I nodded and turned my attention back to Bella. "I needed to be here." I explained when I noticed her brows furrow in a mute question.

On the other side of her bed, I heard a delicate shift of movement. _I should stay to support her but I don't know if I can handle hearing this. _I heard the tortured thoughts of Renee as she bit her lip in much the same fashion as Bella often did when she was conflicted or nervous. "Charlie's down the hall. Maybe you want to say hello?" I told her giving her the "out" she so desperately wanted. At her thankful look, I gave her a small smile.

"Bella?" she questioned.

"It's okay, Mom. I'm sure Dad would like to see you. We'll catch up more later, okay?" Bella gave her mom's hand a reassuring squeeze.

"If you're sure?"

"Positive." She replied. After Renee had left Bella turned to me. "Thank you. I don't think she would be able to sit through this. She's fragile, you know."

So are you my love, I thought but wouldn't utter the words aloud. Instead I tenderly smoothed her hair with my fingertips. I was only partially right I had to concede to myself. Bella more than made up for her physical fragility in her strength of spirit and courage.

"Miss Swan? If you're ready, we'd like to take your statement now." One of the officers interrupted.

Bella straightened in the bed and I could tell she was mentally trying to prepare herself. She squeezed my hand…a light grip of support…for her or me, I did not know. "Okay." She said. "Let's do this."

The officer spoke into his small hand held recorder. "Officer Jenks and Officer Wilson taking statement of Miss Isabella Marie Swan for the crimes enacted against her by Mr. Jacob Black."

Bella winced beside me at the words. I absently rubbed soothing circles on the back of her hand with my thumb.

Officer Jenks started the line of questioning. "What was your relationship with Mr. Black prior to yesterday's events?"

"He was my friend…my best friend." Bella answered in a small voice. "Until Edward came back." She looked at me apologetically. I wanted to assure her that none were needed.

"Were you aware of any romantic inclinations that Mr. Black had for you, if any?"

There was that apologetic look again. Bella was hesitating in her answer, her teeth gnawing on her bottom lip. "He didn't say it in so many words but I knew he was."

"So you retained this friendship with him although you knew he wanted more?" Officer Wilson interjected.

I could feel my lips curl at the thinly veiled accusation. "Do. Not. Even. Go. There." I hissed vehemently through clenched teeth. How dare he make it sound like this was Bella's fault.

"Edward, It's okay." Bella tried to assure me but I was having none of it.

"No, Bella. It is _not_ okay. You nearly…" I tried to force the words out. "You nearly _died _and he has the gall to accuse you of initiating the attack? I don't think so."

"We're sorry, Mr Cullen. We're just trying to establish motive." Jenks said remorsefully while giving the other officer a reprimanding look. "Miss Swan?"

"He said he was content to be my friend." She looked nervously up at them. "…I didn't lead him on. He knew how I felt… That doesn't make me a bad person"

"Of course it doesn't." Jenks told her. "Can you tell us when he stopped being content just being your friend?"

"When Edward came back." Her brows furrowed in thought. "But he always knew. I never lied to him about that."

"Knew about what, Bella?" Wilson prompted.

"He always knew that my heart belonged to Edward."

"So he was angry that Mr. Cullen came back into your life? Did he confront you about that? Make his anger known?"

"On several occasions. Once he actually grabbed me. Left bruises on my arm."

"Did you tell your father?"

She looked at him wide eyed and stunned as she shook her head. "No Of course not. I didn't want to start any trouble between Charlie and Billy Black. They're best friends. I thought I could handle Jacob on my own."

Inwardly, I berated myself for not letting Charlie know what had happened those few times. At the time I had deceived myself into believing that I could be Bella's sole protector and I had failed…my mistake in judgment nearly proving fatal.

"Okay. Let's talk about yesterday morning."

Everything Bella had told them up until this point I already knew. I felt my whole body tense with the realization that I would finally gain knowledge of what actually occurred between the times she was taken and when I came upon Bella struggling underneath the mongrel on the frigid mountaintop.

Even unable to read her thoughts, I knew Bella so well that when she turned to me with a worried expression marking her delicate features, I knew what she was going to say. Before, she even opened her mouth; I placed my finger over her lips to quiet her.

"I'm staying." I told her in no uncertain terms.

"But." She mumbled from under my well placed finger.

"No." I shook my head. "You need me here. Not even the four horsemen of the apocalypse could drag me away."

And it was true even if she didn't want to admit it. It killed me that I couldn't be with her…protect her when she was in her darkest, coldest hours. I was going to make damn sure I stayed with her now.

She gave me a tenuous smile at my words. Not caring that the officers were watching intently, I replaced my finger with a gentle brush of my lips over hers and whispered in her ear.

"I love you."

I felt her body lose some of it's tension which was what I was aiming for. I sat back down in the chair still holding her hand in mine and nodded for the officers to continue.

"You were on your way to your graduation ceremony, correct?" Officer Wilson asked her.

Bella nodded slowly. "Mmm, yes. My dad was called away to work…a robbery, I think. So I had to drive myself. He said he would meet me later at the high school. On my way, my truck just stuttered and died. I called my dad right away to pick me up."

"When we checked over your vehicle for any trace evidence, we found that there was no oil left which is probably why you stalled out." Finks explained.

"But that's impossible. I just had it changed." Bella exclaimed indignantly.

"It's not impossible if Mr. Black siphoned it out. We also know that he was responsible for the robbery at Fred's Ammo yesterday morning causing your father to be unable to take you to graduation."

"He had this all planned out didn't he…to the last detail." Bella said, a note of horror mixed with anger coming into her voice.

"It's alright, love." I murmured to her. "I've already arranged for your new car although you won't be able to drive it for a few weeks at least."

"What do you mean…a new car? What's wrong with my truck? Doesn't it just need more oil?"

The officers held back a grin and perhaps under better circumstances I may have smiled along with them. It was obvious that Bella knew nothing about cars. "When you drive with no oil, it kills the engine I'm afraid." I explained to her. Just as well. She needed a new car. I made sure she got the safest one out there.

Bella's beautiful mouth formed a small "o" as she realized exactly what I was telling her. Finks cleared his throat just then obviously wanted to get back to Bella's statement. Bella gave me a look to let me know that this conversation wasn't over. I held in a sigh but the truth was I knew she would balk over me buying her anything…let alone a new car. For some silly reason I could not fathom she reasoned that if I bought her anything it would tip some cosmic scale of balance out of her favor…as if the existence of her and her unconditional love hadn't irrevocably changed me…made me a better man wasn't enough. To me it was everything.

"Tell us about when Jacob Black showed up." Wilson said.

I held Bella's hand tighter, letting her know that she wasn't going to go through this alone a second time. She went on to explain how Jacob had snuck up on her from the cover of the woods, how he cold cocked her in the head with his gun as her hand absently went to fidget with the bandage on her forehead; how she had woken up cold and in pain with her hands and feet bound.

The monster in me fought for control; to rip apart the corpse that lay in the morgue as I listened in excruciatingly vivid detail of my love's ordeal. A part of me _wanted_ to give the monster free reign; to wreak havoc but I quelled the beast reminding myself that my wants and needs had no place here, not when Bella's needs came first. So I continued to sit and hear feeling the quake of rage in my body synchronize with the tremble in her voice as she told her tale.

"Did he untie you?" Finks asked her when she hesitated to take a breath and a sip of water from the plastic cup I provided for her.

Swallowing, she shook her head and closed her eyes leaning back against the headboard of the hospital bed. I could see a few tears leak from the sides of her eyes. "No." she finally said. "He was trying to torment me…not physically." She amended with a quick panicked glance in my direction when she heard the low growl that escaped from my lips. "It was more of a psychological torment. You see I was trying to convince him to let me go but he wasn't rational at that point although he pretended to be. He told me…he told me that I didn't belong with Edward and the only reason why Edward took me back was out of pity and obligation…that he would grow tired of me and toss me away again."

The rage I was barely holding back nearly broke the surface at her words. She had to know it wasn't true. "Never." I whispered gutturally. She ran her small fingertips down my cheek.

"I know." She whispered back with a sad smile. "I told him that I would never want him and he got so angered he threw down the small knife he had been whittling with and he stormed outside. The knife landed close enough to me that I could grab it with my teeth. After I dropped it into my hands I began to try to cut through the ropes, hence why my wrists look like the way they do." She said with a shrug of her shoulders.

My beautiful, resourceful girl. She had managed to get free by herself. My momentary relief was short lived when she started to speak again of the horrors she was forced to deal with in the hours that came ahead.

"I pretended to be asleep when he came back in the tent only to fall asleep for real. When I woke up he was sleeping and that is when I tried to leave." Bella paused for a shaky breath. The retelling of what happened was starting to take it's toll. My eyes glanced towards the monitors by her bed side, checking to make sure her blood pressure stayed within normal levels. They were elevated somewhat but she wasn't in any danger zone…yet. If that happened, this interview would have to halt immediately.

"Bella. It's okay. You're doing great." Wilson said in a calming tone.

Bella gave a small nod and stared straight ahead lost in her memories. He hand squeezed mine tighter. "He must have heard me cause he woke up just as I was crawling out of the tent. He grabbed my ankle trying to pull me back so I kicked at him, scrambling to loosen his grip so I could get away…I did for a moment. He caught me again. We struggled. I still had his knife. I stabbed at him…repeatedly. It's still a blur but I remember running away criss crossing my tracks as much as possible so he wouldn't be able to tell which way I went. I climbed up a tree hoping he wouldn't find me up there. It was so cold. I remember thinking I was going to die." She stopped and inhaled deeply. "I didn't want to die." She said her chin quivering as she looked at me once again.

There was nothing I wanted to do more at that moment than embrace her in my arms to let her know she was safe…to assure myself that she was safe. That Jacob Black could never hurt her again.

"He found me." Bella finally said. "He taunted me again. I could tell he was going to climb up after me so I did the only thing I could do…I jumped out and away. When I landed, I kind of rolled down some sort of incline towards the edge of the mountain. He ran after me and jumped on top of me. I knew then what he was going to do. I tried to fight but he was much stronger. I couldn't feel my body anymore. I was numb. That's when Edward and Sam showed up and then everyone else. I am sure you know what happened at that point." She said with defeat in her voice and a casual wave of her hand.

The all too vivid memories assailed me again at that point as my mind conjured up the visions of Bella trapped with a gun pointed at her head and the rest of us rendered immobile unable to do anything for fear of the outcome. I had to turn away to collect my composure; to try to clear my mind of the horror that would remain with me for the rest of my existence.

"We did take a statement from the others but we would like to hear what happened from your point of view." Finks told her.

"Is that really necessary?" I bit out through clenched teeth. "Hasn't she been through enough?"

"It's imperative we get all the facts, sir." Finks replied solemnly. "Bella, I wouldn't ask unless it was important. We need all the information so none of this can be questioned."

"I understand." Bella nodded, her brows wrinkling. "It is almost a blur. But I remember thinking we were at an impasse. No one could do anything when Jacob had the gun and we were standing so close to the edge. It was up to me to create a diversion. So I bit him. He let go of me momentarily and before I knew it Jacob and I were struggling for control over the gun."

"Why didn't you just let you dad take the shot if he had the opportunity?"

The very question I wanted to know the answer to. As I watched her intently, she looked at me. Judging by the expression on her face, she knew I was not going to like the answer.

"Because I didn't want Charlie to have to kill his best friend's son. I don't think he could have bore that kind of guilt…no matter what he would have said to the contrary. At the time I felt I had no other choice."

My gut clenched at her words. _No other choice. _There were those words again. Of course she had a choice. Did she really think Charlie could live with the guilt if she died? Did she think _I _could live with it? Never could I forget the image of her falling over the side of the cliff nor the agonizing feeling that came with it. It was one hundred times worse than when Rosalie had told me that Bella had jumped to her death months ago because this time I was a witness to it.

I was so involved with my thoughts, I barely noticed the two officers thanking Bella for her time before exiting the room. Finding it difficult to sit still any longer, I got up and went over to the window staring blindly at the night sky. My emotions were tumultuous at best.

"You're angry." Bella said softly. I could hear the faint rustle of her bed sheets as she shifted her position on the bed and heard her slight intake of breath from the pain the movement cost her.

I clenched my jaw and closed my eyes, not daring to face her just yet; not knowing how to answer her.

"I'm sorry, Edward. I wasn't thinking clearly at the time. I know it must have been excruciatingly difficult for you."

I turned to her swiftly then, stalking over to her; unable to tolerate the distance between us and gave her a kiss marked with desperation and hunger.

"Difficult is the understatement of the century, love." I rasped when our lips finally broke apart. "You can never do that to me again."

Before she answered me I heard Charlie walking towards the room. His thoughts rang out loudly. He was nervous in his anticipation to see Bell again.

"Charlie's coming. I informed her. "I…I should go. Change my clothes." I shrugged.

"Keep up appearances. I know. You look hungry too"

"It's manageable. I'll be back a little later. I don't want to be away from you any longer than I have too. I already have clearance to spend the night." I finished with a small grin.

Bella stroked my hair. "It's alright Edward. If you need to feed you should go. I'm perfectly safe here."

I looked up and spotted Charlie leaning in the doorway with his hands in his pockets. I nodded a greeting to him and kissed Bella's forehead tenderly.

"I'll see you later. I love you." I whispered to her before leaving.

"Love you too." She called out. I left with a final glance trying to resolve that she was in fact safe and the cuts and bruises that marred her face as well as the emotional damage she suffered would heal in time.

Bella's POV

Charlie walked in after Edward said his goodbyes and sat in the chair that Edward just vacated.

"That boy really loves you." Charlie said nodding towards the empty doorway.

I suppressed a snort upon hearing Charlie refer to Edward as a boy. If he only knew. "I know. I really love him too." Was all I responded.

"So how are ya doing, kiddo? I must say you look a lot better than the last time I saw you." I noticed he shuddered slightly at his own words. I could only imagine what I must have looked like when they first brought me in.

"I've been better but I'll live." I said nonchalantly. It would have served no purpose to tell my dad that every move, every breath was painful. The morphine was starting to wear off. I was merciful that I was able to cover so well while Edward was here. He didn't need to suffer anymore on my behalf than he already did.

"Yeah. You sure are a trooper." – he let out a breath then and I saw a glisten in his eye – "I am so sorry Bella…for not protecting you…for pushing you towards Jacob. If I hadn't then maybe you would have come to me sooner when he was giving you problems."

How did he know about that? Unless…"Did Edward tell you about that?" I asked, my eyes narrowing.

"You bet he did." Charlie let out a derisive chuckle. "It's a hard pill to swallow knowing you could have prevented your little girl from being hurt."

"Char…Dad. Don't blame yourself. I doubt I would have told you even if you hadn't liked Jacob so much. So really…you couldn't have prevented it anyway. Jacob was sick."

"Edward knew." He supplied still insisting on taking some of the blame.

This time I did snort. "Well Edward almost has like a sixth sense when it comes to reading people. It can be downright scary."

"In this case, it saved your life."

I fought to suppress a yawn but Charlie noticed anyway. The day was taking it's toll on me and I was exhausted even if I had spent much of it unconscious.

"You're exhausted and here I am rambling on. You should get some sleep."

"It's okay dad. I'm not that tired." I said trying to cover up my fatigue, not ready to say goodbye to him just yet.

"You always were a lousy liar, Bells." He laughed. "Go on get some rest. I'll come back in the morning." He gave me a kiss on the cheek before leaving.

Despite the pain I was in, I quickly fell asleep.

Sometime in the middle of the night I woke up feeling like I was on fire. It was then the horrible wracking coughs started.


End file.
